Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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If you could wipe out one person from history (alive or dead), anyone at all, who would you choose and why?I mean, you could wipe out that person at work who stopped you from doing something, or that guy who went out with that girl who she chose over you.... or you could wipe out Ceaser or hitler or whatever.
And how would [your life/the world] be different?
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 12:57,
118 replies,
latest was 15 years ago)
Pffft, proper mindpiss that one.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 12:58,
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I'd have a crack at mitochondrial Eveand replace her with a fuck-off massive robot with a laser in its face. We'd all be cyborgs and would most likely have flying cars by now.
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 12:58,
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Hold up now, no one said anything about replacing(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 12:59,
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I'm taking your game and making my own.I'm a maverick, I've never stuck to the rules, some say I have a cold prosthetic heart, others that I'm the son of the devil, but in truth I'm just a bit shit.
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:00,
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:03,
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no, I'm sure he warms thatbefore ramming it up some poor unsuspecting farm animal.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:06,
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Can I have several goes?If so, Lee Harvey Oswald, and if JFK still carks it, whoever the blame falls on next. And so on, until we know who did it. The consequences would be either that the CIA would be dismantled and the American political system collapse in on itself as a result of the corruption and scandal discovered at its rotten heart, with Canada and Mexico seizing their opportunity to assimilate the varying states into their own countries, and the USSR winning the space race and eventually making Top Gun and Armageddon in Russian... or Lyndon B. Johnson would never have been President.
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You have thought too much about this one(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:04,
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Top of my head, mateI thought it would be more interesting than my stock response, "that cunt Michael McIntyre"
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I want a truth raywhere you can see what actually went on. That would be excellent
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:06,
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^thisbeing as I am a nosy cow, and I want to know everything about everything.
Within reason.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:08,
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Doesn't fit the question thoughUnless there's a specific scientist who opposed and obstructed the constructon of a truth ray. Obviously we'd need a truth ray to know who that was.
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:09, Reply)
JUST GIVE ME MY FUCKING TRUTH RAY(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:10,
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It would be enormously useful at football matchesAlthough it would ruin the English sports fan's second favourite pasttime; complaining about unfair refereeing
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:11, Reply)
Can't a man dream, Darth?If we want an all-encompassing truth ray, who are you to stand in our way? I demand SCIENCE work on it immediately!
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:11,
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I for one am terrified by this prospectIf my boss got hold of one he'd know how much time I spend talking to you lot instead of working
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:12, Reply)
+ with your hand on your willyor, in your case, someone else's willy.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:14,
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I think it's because he has realised that no one gives a shit(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:19,
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I don't really care what anyone else thinks, as you should have realised by nowIt's because B3th should be capable of much better than that
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:21, Reply)
knowing and caring are different things(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:27,
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Now you're just being sillyI'm not sure how old you are but I'm sure you weren't around and handling firearms in 1963
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:17, Reply)
but if canada took over? grossand mexicans are worse than pikeys
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Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:20,
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Would that make any difference at all?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:04,
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He's hoping that whoever would have got the Deputy PM/national scapegoat job would have had a surname that rhymed with "cronies"(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:06, Reply)
I'd get rid of my internet nemesisthe consequence of which being there would be a lot fewer strikethroughs on this board.
Alternatively, get rid of Genghis Khan and about a quarter of the world's population would cease to exist, thus easing overpopulation issues. More oil for everyone!
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:05,
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You'd be more offended if I answered a question without mentioning youyou attention-whore.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:09,
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You know me so well, LOINWe're clearly meant to be *gazes into oddly-timed sunset*
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:10, Reply)
I'm baffled, show your workingsre. alt
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:08,
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I think it's along the lines ofgo back far enough and everyone is related to everyone else.
Then twisted with a lack of scienceskillz
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:09,
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i think i heard somewhere that like 40% of the population is related to him down the line(
Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:12,
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if that is truethen the same could be said of anyone alive at that time who had a few kids.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:12,
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I know, I'm saying that people alive now are related to people alive back then(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:14,
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but more people are related to him than joe schmo that cleaned the castle towers(
Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:22,
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man, i love jesusi went out without trousers this morning and it started raining and it was like jesus was telling me to get inside and put trousers on
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Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:38,
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were you wearing something instead of trousers?(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:40,
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You've got two parents, each of your parents had two parents and so on and so onso does everybody else alive today. You don't have to go too far back before the amount of people required to pass genetic material on to you exceeds that of the population of that time.
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Kroney, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:33,
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By the time you go back 15 generations, the number is up to 65536 peopleand 15 generations is what, about 300 years? You're still only in 1711.
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Kroney, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:44,
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Go back another 5 generations and the number's at over 2 millionby now you're in 1611 and the population of the UK is only about 6 million at that point. Two more generations and at about 1540, you're up to 8 million people required and the populaton stands at about 5 million people.
Genghis Khan lived in the 1250s or thereabouts.
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Kroney, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:47,
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No point, everybody alive today is related to Genghis Khan.And also Joe the cess pit cleaner. Fact.
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Kroney, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:49,
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awbut i was really starting to get interested in what you were saying
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Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:55,
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No, I think it was more along the lines of him having more kids than anyone, evereven more than Josef Fritzl.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:13,
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probably had some impactI'm fairly sure that they talked about it on QI using Charlemagne as an example, and said that it wasn't just because he had loads of kids, but just because he had some, and it was really long ago.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:18,
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Oh, I know fuck all of the man, apart from the Mongols having a discernable impact in terms of murder and rapine on the worlds population(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:12,
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hmmmm, tricky so random(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:09,
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yeahI'm forever tripping over three-wheelers.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:10,
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Little fucking thingstoe of experience
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:11,
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thealternativefact, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:13,
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Children left the trikes for my toes to find(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:14,
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Bonothat cunt
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:07,
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I'm deciding if the two is some reference to Vipros and Bono being two cuntsor if you're just being a retard
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:23,
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you know that Bono is from the band U2 right?(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:26,
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No I live in a caveand have no knowledge of any pop culture. I also think it is all shit. I am monty, I will use my five pounds to buy MASSIVE DRUGS
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:28,
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sounds like a wise move(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:32,
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thanksI was going to email you, but I've lost your address...
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:36,
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Actually, if we could twist the rules and bring someone backI'd choose John Smith. He would have made a brilliant prime minister, and we would never have been subjected to that gurny cunt Blair.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:12,
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This is a good ideaHe seemed like a decent chap. Awfully bad timing to die then
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:14,
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I have decided I'll never do it all...so I won't do any of it.
Until my boss comes back in...
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thealternativefact, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:14,
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Naughty Clendrix!*dances* I think I may have convinced Charlie that whoever os working a six day week can leave at 3pm on Wednesdays *dances more*
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:15,
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No I have been shit and sitting around in the sun mainly(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:17,
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maybe in the winter when it's not sunny outsideI think I'm just angry abotu the rip off prices. If my feet weren't still bleeding I'd go walking. But sitting on the roof in the sun is soooo much easier and nicer
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:20,
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The man who decided that it would be a good idea for mobile phones to be able to play musicAnd then sold his idea to a company that allows chavs to buy their phones.
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Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:11,
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i think i may take out george w. but i'm not sure how i feel about it really
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Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:13,
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Not so keen on pretzels though(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:14,
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I bet he was more entertaining before he was on the wagonlike, when he was a cheerleader, for instance.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:15,
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I imagine so...he was pretty entertaining while he was on it.
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thealternativefact, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:17,
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I'm choosing to believe you mean a much older George Wand would like to know who you'd put on Rushmore in his place
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:15, Reply)
Obvious answer is obviousArnie!
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:16,
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I'd put Jackie StalloneAnd some neon lights saying "Jacs is WATCHING YOU" and maybe some laser eyes. And people would drive past with their eyes shut screaming MAKE IT GO AWAY
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:17,
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I retract my obvious answer and choose this one
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:17,
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If Americans ever stop being scared of Muslims and shoebombersand need terrifying back into line, this is an excellent idea
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:19, Reply)
you choose wrongi mean george w. bush
not the founding father of our country
*sings national anthem*
*forgets half the words*
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Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:21,
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I realised that Your 43rd President was something of a let-down compared to your 1st. Or 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th or 8th. Van Buren was a fucking twat though.
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:23, Reply)
something of a let-downwell that's putting it fucking mildly
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Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:27,
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I can't decided if my favourite president is the 22nd or the 24th(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:27,
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I can't decided whether I give a single solitary flying fuck about this sub-thread, no waitI can, it's boring
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:31,
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Way to up the interest there.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:33,
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my favorite was the 124thfree pizza on thursdays
so awesome
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Lisette von Falcon, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:39,
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I was an American president!I got impeached too
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:35,
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Just seen the list of presidentsAnd it says that George Washington didnt have a party... You would think that someone would have at least bought him a balloon or something
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:43, Reply)
Is this a tree reference or do you have some previously undiscovered evidence that Washington was a nonce?
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:50, Reply)
It was a tree referenceI cannot tell a lie
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:51,
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That wont keep the CIA away materun now... Caves are teh best place to hide
(, Tue 12 Apr 2011, 13:53, Reply)
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