I'm fantastic.
Went for a five mile run earlier, now I'm lounging around in my pants. Gonna give my old man a ring in a sec because he's got a day off and I fancy bowling round town with him in tow.

Alt: I think my paperround when I was fifteen. I could barely see straight and did that comedy thing on a bike where you stop cycling and gradually wind to a half, and fall perfectly sideways. Last time I was fucked at work was when I pulled an all nighter after I saw Arctic Monkeys at Brixton. Spent all morning trying to get rid of the leftover bugle in my schnozz and got called into the manager's office. People were complaining that I was at my desk completely spaced out and picking my nose. Great days.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:07, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

I had a little sniff last night, but all the coke was stuck to the bag, meaning I had to gum it
Fucking hell, drinking with numb lips is a little odd, isn't it?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:18, Reply)

I much prefer bags to wraps, but it does get well sticky in them things.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:24, Reply)

Tis a bit of a pain.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:25, Reply)

I prefer suitcases.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:26, Reply)

Have you started tidying all evidence from the flat?
Out of respect for Lustys Mum.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:30, Reply)

I've done a bit.
When I get back from seeing my daughter tomorrow I intend to spend all day and evening sorting the place out.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:31, Reply)

Bloody hell, how much 'evidence' do you have lying around?

( girlinthehole, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:33, Reply)

How many half wraps and small bags with bits of grass do you hope to find?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:34, Reply)

There is a wrap of DMT down the back of my records which still needs retrieving.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:34, Reply)

Not done any of that for ages.
is it still legal?
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:38, Reply)

I can't believe I managed to not do drugs ONCE while I visited you.
I was fully expecting to be introduced to the culture. :P
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:44, Reply)

He may be a drug addled old cunt but I doubt he would have loved the thought of turning you into one.

( girlinthehole, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:49, Reply)

turning you into one sharing.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:52, Reply)

Once I had an envelope pretty full of speed.
I was walking round Soho with it with a mate whilst we were wearing giant sombreros. Subtle.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:31, Reply)

I once had a sombrero full of cocaine, whores and mariachi players.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:34, Reply)

Was it a TARDIS?
You know, Time And Relative Dimension in Sombrero?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:36, Reply)

Trumpets and Roxannes Dancing in Sombrero.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:45, Reply)

Hahahahaha

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:49, Reply)

That's impressive

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:55, Reply)

Backforming an acronym is impressive?
    Unless you're borderline illiterate then surely anybody can do it.
    Maybe that's why this place is dying.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 10:14, Reply)

*holds up two '10' cards*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 10:15, Reply)

I prefer cans
it tastes wrong out of bottles.

Wait, am I doing this wrong?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:38, Reply)

You are doing it very wrong.
Cans over bottles? Are you fucking nuts?
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:39, Reply)

plastic bottles, I'm talking about.
I'm sure it's fine out of glass ones, but we're not allowed glass up here in case the weegies get hold of it.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:40, Reply)

It sounds like you live somewhere ace.
Plastic bottles are wrong, yes. Although no one agrees with me when I say lager tastes far better out of a (glass) bottle than a pint glass.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:42, Reply)

Stella, true.
But after that, it's down to the state of the taps
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:44, Reply)

I don't know if I agree about that
but on an amusing tale of pretentiousness and stupidity, when I lived in That London^TM I would occasionally frequent a crap place called Bar 38 in CG. Becks on draft was £3 a pint or £3.25 for a 275ml bottle. Everyone was standing around drinking bottles and could not see the fuckwittery of doing so. Still, I suppose you have to drink less piss for your money if you think of it that way.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:45, Reply)

Proper Becks, or shitty 4%?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:49, Reply)

This was more than 10 years ago
they hadn't invented becks driving lager.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:56, Reply)

That stuff is vile in most places.
Just a terribly poured pint.

Normal Becks is wonderful.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Yeah that's ridiculously stupid. I'm just saying I prefer the taste out of a bottle.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Oh, and actually where I live is lovely
it's just sometimes they get through the fence that separates us from west lothian, so we must be vigilant.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:47, Reply)

Only the lowest dregs of the riff raff barrel drink lager out of the bottle.
The sort of cunt who can't tuck in his Ben Sherman shirt and puts too much cheap gel in his spiky receding hair and disguises his bank teller body odour with half a can of Boots Junglish pit spray. Is that the sort of cunt you are? I bet it fucking is.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:49, Reply)

Stella out of bottles is pretty wonderful, I find.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Tuck your fucking shirt in.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Yes Sir.
*tucks*
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Lager tastes (marginally) better out of a bottle
because lager tastes like shit. A large part of taste includes the use of other senses, such as smell. If your drink is in a pint glass you can smell it as you drink it. If it is in a bottle, you are not sticking your nose inside when you take a swig.
In conclusion, drink shit drinks from a bottle; drink good drinks from a wide-brimmed glass.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 29 Jul 2011, 10:13, Reply)