I now have new DMs and have to go through the terrible process of wearing the fucking things in so they're comfy and knackered looking.
Any ideas?
( girlinthehole, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 14:56, 5 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Put them on a horse for a couple of days

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 14:56, Reply)

Well the horse is going to look silly with only one pair of boots on.

( girlinthehole, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:00, Reply)

The perfect excuse to buy some more boots!

(Bazongaloid, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:07, Reply)

Yay!

( girlinthehole, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

Mink oil should soften up the leather nicely.
Also, wearing them round the house to allow your sweat and skin oil to soften the leather should do.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Mon 15 Aug 2011, 14:57, Reply)

Mink oil???
Were any minks hurt in the process of extracting the oil?
( girlinthehole, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 14:59, Reply)

I hope so
they're horrible creatures.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:00, Reply)

Yes.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mink_oil

You could also use macadamia nut oil or sea buckthorn oil. But as you're wearing leather DMs I didn't think you'd be bothered about that.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:09, Reply)

I don't eat mink.

( girlinthehole, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:11, Reply)

This is a good point though
I'm pretty confident animals had to die for you to wear those boots, same as they'd have to die for you to eat steak.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:23, Reply)

Fill them loosely w/newspaper and tie them into a "ball" with string.
Leave over night. Wear. Repeat.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 14:59, Reply)

What if you simply encouraged a cat to play with the ball of string overnight?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:00, Reply)

Works for me Al.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:01, Reply)

How about
Just wear them for a bit?
I know it seems like a long-winded process, but in the grand scheme of things...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:00, Reply)

But she's a bit older than us
time gets more precious. The time she's spending wearing her new DMs is time she could have been spending getting fingered in the toilets of her local pub.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:02, Reply)

why couldn't she wear the DMs for this?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:05, Reply)

Because it's really hard to get your knickers off over the boots without taking them off.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:07, Reply)

just push them to one side
some people quite like this. or so i've heard.

next!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:08, Reply)

They get in the way of a good fingering
you have to devote one finger, or part of your hand, to keeping the material out of the way.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:14, Reply)

Tear them off then

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:16, Reply)

Harder than you'd think
Especially as northern pants are all made from sacking.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

and old ladies wear pants that go from their waist to their knees...

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:21, Reply)

it's in a pub toilet
who said anything about it being "good".

anyway, she can hold her own pants out of the way!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:17, Reply)

If you can co-ordinate your thoughts into doing anything but wibbling and drooling
then it's not a particularly great fingering...
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:22, Reply)

Haha

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:26, Reply)

Also, with BGB's advancing years
The time it takes to break in a pair of DMs will pass by in the blink of an eye.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:07, Reply)

Lol

( girlinthehole, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:06, Reply)

bash them against the wall of the house for about 20 mins
my friend did this when we were kids and they looked all cool and shit.

she went to bed. her grandma lovingly polished and cleaned them all up for her.

i don't know who was more pissed off the next day.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 15 Aug 2011, 15:02, Reply)