Definitely horrific.
Fuck me this hurts.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:15, 1 reply, 14 years ago)

WTF?
Are you back up North then Baz?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:23, Reply)

Can anyone here relate to Baz's stories?
Or does everyone read them with their eyes as wide as mine?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:25, Reply)

I read them in Ross Kemps voice,
os more acurately in John Culshaws impression of Ross Kemp. "an then I could see it was about to all kick off, so I was out of there"
(PsychoChomp, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:52, Reply)

Have been for a few weeks.
One of them spat in my eye on Saturday night and then had the cheek to call the police when I refused to leave his front door after he ran inside. Spitting is my number one hate in the world, I'd rather someone knocked me out over being spat at. Went for an inspection last night because if it's the last thing I do I will kill one of them/burn their house down and two of them piled out and now my head is badly dented. At least I think I broke one of their noses. I'm genuinely a pacifist, and unless someone does something to me I will never do a thing towards anyone. These guys have it coming.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:28, Reply)

Is the spitting related to the not being able to see?
If so, you better see a doctor sharpish, no?
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:31, Reply)

No the not being able to see is because one of them got a clean punch to the side of my head.
Well they got many clean punches to the side of my head. I'd call the police back on them but my housemate can't risk anything like that because someone's been kicked off his course for something similar.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:33, Reply)

What's the beef over?
Why would he spit in your eye?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:34, Reply)

Well when me and my mate came back on Saturday.
A lad who was staying with our other housemate (knows him from back home) was standing at our door with a bloodied nose. He'd come back from town and asked the lads eight doors down (they were outside in the road) if they knew what number we lived at cos he couldn't remember. Apparently this was an unreasonable thing to do and the bullying twats kicked off at him. So when we saw him he told us what happened and pointed to the people responsible (they were still outside), we went and had a word with them. Asked what the hell their problem was and I was spat at. Honestly I'm going to make their lives an utter misery, I'm too stubborn to let it drop.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:42, Reply)

They sound like a right bunch of cunts

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:42, Reply)

calm down 'fruit of the loom'
if you confronted them and you're going to "make their lives an utter misery, I'm too stubborn to let it drop" you're as bad as they are.

Rise above it, or are you not man enough?
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:53, Reply)

If it was possible I'd call the police and report them.
But I can't. As previously mentioned, I'd never hurt anyone and I go out of my way to avoid confrontation. But when confronted with cunts of this magnitude there is no way I'm rising above it.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:57, Reply)

How about you talk to them when you're all sober?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:59, Reply)

or just leave it
you know, like a grown up
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:59, Reply)

bit difficult with neighbours though innit.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:00, Reply)

not really
they're several doors down. If they kick off you walk away and if they continue to harass you go to the police.

You don't get dragged into a fight like a child
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:02, Reply)

I just want everyone to get along tf

(PsychoChomp, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:03, Reply)

this will result in an all out FEUD between us, psychochomp

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:05, Reply)

NO
gay daisy chain.

you know it makes sense.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:01, Reply)

this is the answer
it's always the answer
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:02, Reply)

yes
although you have to wonder how it works in practice. do they all have to heave in time, like rowers?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:04, Reply)

I;m heaving at the thought.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:08, Reply)

If you think about the mechanics of that
you'll see it couldn't possibly work satisfactorily. You'd have to offset the rhythm.

Person B in the queue would have to be going backwards at the same time as Persons A and C were going forwards.
( Kroney, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:09, Reply)

do you really think my brain is capable of envisaging that kind of mechanics?
it must work, because people do it - a gay friend of mine has been in a chain of 9, he tells me - but HOW?!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:11, Reply)

All aboard the bum train

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:13, Reply)

If you're all going backwards and forwards at the same time and rate
then your bits aren't going to be moving at all, relatively. I don't see how that could be fun.
( Kroney, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:13, Reply)

they'll still be somewhere warm and tight
and there'll be a lot to look at. i think the novelty factor would do it.

if you were into that sort of thing, anyway.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:21, Reply)

I can't imagine anybody would be there to take in the view.

( Kroney, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:22, Reply)

er, dude
i think they'd ALL be there to take in the view. as part of the overall experience.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:24, Reply)

Needs MOAR cox

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:11, Reply)

Haha!
Prof Brian?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:11, Reply)

ouch
don't make me laugh.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:04, Reply)

Yeah', deffo, go down the park, take a few Fruit Shoots, some carrot sticks, babybells and make daisy chains, although I think we might be out of season.
I suppose they could braid each other's hair.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:29, Reply)

you'll be dead by christmas
think of the children!

Internet hardmanning is not big or clever
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:59, Reply)

Barry, listen up, you see, I'm from the streets too.
When a rival gang would impose on our turf, when things got serious, when rap battles don't work anymore.... we have a tickling fight. We bowl up to the rival gang, and start tickling their sides, and they'll do the same to us. Eventually we're all laughing so much that we forgot what the beef was all about and we can go about our lives as normal again.

A man's got to do what a man's gotta do, no feather dusters, hands only.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:55, Reply)

I've tried fluffy fingers.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Thumb war?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:02, Reply)

Do you live in Hollyoaks?

( Kroney, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:38, Reply)

No but I do sometimes feel someone's swapped my life with the plot of a terrible straight to DVD action/romcom film starring Adam Sandler.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:42, Reply)

You want to be careful
if they're starting scraps over being asked house numbers. There's something not kosher there.
( Kroney, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:44, Reply)

I know exactly the type of people they are which is what riles me further.
Posh knobhead toffs from Surrey who like to bully people when they have the chance. I'd never call the police normally but seeing as the cheeky twats did it to us I'd love to phone them now and tell them I was assaulted. Only thing stopping me is my housemate has begged me not to.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:47, Reply)

Not his fault is it?
Two options, either full on feud or leave well alone.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Alternatively, 3am petrol bomb.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:52, Reply)

I never once said it was his fault and fully respect his wishes.
And full on feud it is.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:52, Reply)

you're gonna end up in jail
and your kids will starve and your wife will kill herself
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:55, Reply)

IT'S GONNA BE MURDAAA!1
Several 'uni' students rowing over something or other for the rest of the year. Timothy might even get his glasses broken. Before you know it Barrys got the Nigerian Whites up to sort the whole thing out.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:00, Reply)

I think there's probably more to the story than that.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:53, Reply)

somebody give this man some head
he's clearly hit it with a nail
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:54, Reply)

Yes, someone give me head ffs

(PsychoChomp, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:01, Reply)

Haha, don't all rush at once.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:03, Reply)

These guys live 8 doors away, phsyco girl lives 4 days away.
That's some crazy ass street you live on.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:56, Reply)

I think he lives in a Space song.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 9:58, Reply)

*click*
Watch out for No 59
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:09, Reply)

it's almost like Barry's the mental one and the cause of it all

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:01, Reply)

I thought you'd be well up for it, Gonz
it's Hollyoaks
( Kroney, Tue 11 Oct 2011, 10:05, Reply)