Rant o'clock
Please feel free to unload your frustrations in an arcing spurt all over this thread. What is REALLY fucking you off today?

Alt:
What is excellent about today?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:46, 126 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

My sister. Can't go into details but I'm fucked off.
Alt: bugger all.
( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:48, Reply)

I'm on a meh day today
The prospect of sloe gin and steak is keeping me non-postal
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:51, Reply)

I'll have the sloe gin
you can keep the steak
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:59, Reply)

It's only the thought of an awesome weekend after this that's keeping me sane.

( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:01, Reply)

What are you up to on it?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:03, Reply)

Off to DG's and tourettes for the weekend. Noel will also be attending.

( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:05, Reply)

Sounds ace, have a great time

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:08, Reply)

Iss mah birthday weekend!
*wiggles*
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:12, Reply)

Hopefully Mildew won't tread on your balls

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:12, Reply)

Cool have a lovely time

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:20, Reply)

I've just spurted at City Link
I think I'm done for a while

hmm well it's Friday that means dinner and wine and then curled up on the sofa watching a film with my lovely other half when I get home later
/vomit inducing sappy shit
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:48, Reply)

Club Cloppicana is open for business!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:50, Reply)

It's always open for business!

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:56, Reply)

+ because we can't get shutters big enough

(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:08, Reply)

:(
*sells your towel rail*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:10, Reply)

SADFACE!!!!!!

(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:16, Reply)

lolz only joking

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:23, Reply)

It's still not december 1st and I want to start on my lego advent calendar.
However, I have done next to nothing so far today and gotten away with it.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:50, Reply)

£12 in Wilkos, apparently

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:51, Reply)

BOSH!
I got mine from Argos. Wilkos didn't have any.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:55, Reply)

If I dont get one for my birthday, I'll get one from there

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:56, Reply)

This year it features the classic nativity scene of a burglar getting nicked by a policeman on a snow ski and put in jail

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:57, Reply)

I'm hoping for the space one, TBH

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:01, Reply)

I've got that PUDDI PUDDI song stuck in my head.
I don't even know the words, apart from the "PUDDI PUDDI!" bits.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:22, Reply)

I think that's the only words.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:31, Reply)

Nah. It goes
PUDDI PUDDI
PUDDI PUDDI
A squibble bibble
GIGA PUDDI!
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:42, Reply)

My paint still hasn't arrived.
I'm so angry I made a lego table then flipped it.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:51, Reply)

mark morrison, earlier

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:53, Reply)

Haha!

( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:01, Reply)

Nah, that's maffers when his bday presents didn't arrive.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:05, Reply)

has he lost his mac?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:03, Reply)

The ridiculous travelling time tonight,
the people at the job centre, and that I just broke my diet for the first time today.

Alt: Nothing in the least. Though at least the travelling will give me time to think I guess.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:54, Reply)

What did you break it with, it better have been worth it.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:56, Reply)

It wasn't at all
but I was starving and I didn't want soup or carrots, so I had onion rings and maybe a beer
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:59, Reply)

DUN DUUNNNN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHH
it's ok, but don't think "oh I've slipped up once what's the point of dieting any more" because that's stupid.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:59, Reply)

True, but it's been three months
and although I've lost, it has been slowly and in ridiculously tiny amounts so I'm getting to the point of frustration.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:00, Reply)

*coughs to clear throat*
YOU ARE NOT FAT
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:02, Reply)

You've never met me!
I could be like the Houses of Parliament.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:03, Reply)

Full of dicks?

( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:22, Reply)

She's so full of semen she once got mistaken for a submarine

(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:31, Reply)

That's the best way to lose weight.
Keep at it Amberl!
(PsychoChomp, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:03, Reply)

Alt: Have had three very good telephone conversations with headhunters and applied for 4 jobs today.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:58, Reply)

Every commuter in London
Whether you walk, cycle, drive, bus, or taxi, fuck you ALL.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 12:59, Reply)

I do cartwheels to the office when I work in London.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:04, Reply)

You're okay then.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:09, Reply)

It's tiring but I don't want to upset Himjim.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:10, Reply)

It's cool brah
If you doing cartwheels at least I can see you.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:12, Reply)

haha

( WormuIus, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:16, Reply)

My own pickiness is pissing me off. I'm trying to move, but I hate everything I'm seeing.
I've got three potentials lined up for tomorrow and I know I'm going to hate them all already just from the pictures the estate agencies have given me. I have a very specific list of requirements and so far only the one flat has met them all. Unfortunately, it also failed the criteria that I hadn't realised I was applying.

I am a ridiculous creature.

Alt: This morning I had chocolate for breakfast and last night I, like, totally made out with a fit girl.
( Kroney, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:06, Reply)

Did it have visible otters?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:08, Reply)

It was near a bella pasta

(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:09, Reply)

is that the place you get a roll with every order?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:11, Reply)

HAHAHAHA
Oh man I almost cracked a smile there.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:16, Reply)

It's hard to tell if you're smiling or not
as there is always food in front of your mouth
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:17, Reply)

it lid
( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:08, Reply)

Beggers can't be choosers

( Kroney, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:09, Reply)

I like nosing around flats
I lucked out when I found mine though. I had to kill two other potential people to get it but totally worth it. And the police haven't caught me yet.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:10, Reply)

I find the whole thing exceptionally tedious.
The only place I actually really liked was too expensive and too incovenient. Fuck flats.
( Kroney, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:11, Reply)

The only thing my flat doesn't have is a garden/outdoor space.
Or a subway opposite.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:12, Reply)

There's one place I'm interested in seeing tomorrow
but it's not available to move into until mid-January, which fails the "move by early December" criteria. It very probably also fails the "room for all my stuff" criteria.

Ballbags.
( Kroney, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:15, Reply)

No room for your ballbags?

( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:15, Reply)

They take up a lot of space.
I've been single for at least three months now.
( Kroney, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Why are you moving from where you are now?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:18, Reply)

Because the commute is costing me way too much now.
Also, I want to start looking for work elsewhere and not in London. Reading looks promising, and I would prefer to not have another five years of 60 mile round trips every day.
( Kroney, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:19, Reply)

Nothing is pissing me off today.
I had a full night's sleep and feel awake and energetic for the first time in absolutely months and months, so I'm uncharacteristically happy.

Alt: see above.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:09, Reply)

Alt: I'm not at work, that is pretty excellent
So I've spent all morning rehearsing for a gig. And then to ice this sweet cake I have just eaten a potato masala dosa. Go me!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:17, Reply)

Potato Masala Dosa is the thing to say
On a bright Hawaiian Christmas day
That's the island greeting that we send to you
From the land where palm trees sway.
Here's we know that Christmas will be clear and bright
The sun will shine by day and all the stars at night
Potato Masala Dosa is Hawaii's way
To say merry Christmas to you
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:29, Reply)

How lovely. Did you write that?
I can imagine you tapping it out with your hooves as your trainer attempts to decipher the code and note it down.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:32, Reply)

I should probably make this quite clear.
Normally I am baldmonkey, but I'm not bald (although I do shave my head) and I am not a monkey.
Also, although I am here under the username Personality Horse, I am not a horse. I don't even have a personality.
I am, like all humans, an ape. A personality-free ape with average amounts of hair.

And no, I didn't write that. It's a SUPERB Bing Crosby song.
Surpringly, Bing Crosby is not related to Bill Cosby even though their names are similar. You can check this on wikipedia.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:40, Reply)

13 minutes until home o'clock

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:47, Reply)

Christ.
I've two and a bit hours to go first.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:48, Reply)

Why do only fools and horses work?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:49, Reply)

Worst program EVER

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:50, Reply)

You prefer spin-off series The Green Green Grass then?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:52, Reply)

Not a patch on First Of The Summer Wine

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:53, Reply)

and it's classic spiritual succesor 'My family'

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:54, Reply)

GOODNIGHT SWEETHEART.
This is like the sitcom version of Mornington Cresent.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:55, Reply)

EASTENDERS!
The bird off of My Family was Nigels daughter in Eastenders
(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:57, Reply)

HOLBY CITY!
Nigel from eastenders is now in Holby City
(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:57, Reply)

WHY DON'T YOU?!
That was a shit programme as well.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:59, Reply)

EXTRAS

(PsychoChomp, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:59, Reply)

STAR TREK TNG!

(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:01, Reply)

last friday orf the month, if we start at 8:30 and skip lunch we can leave at 2
every other friday is 4pm finish
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:49, Reply)

I'm just surprised that there is STILL so fucking long left.
I am borrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:54, Reply)

3 hours and 40 to go here.
you bastard
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:49, Reply)

why are you now a badger?
are you trying to infiltrate us?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:52, Reply)

If he can do it, so can I.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:54, Reply)

What?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:55, Reply)

I can't decide between Personality Badger and baldadger

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:56, Reply)

Can you decide on Bollocks Badger?
Or was that not you? If it was you, that was my favourite sock puppet account ever. Even better than INTERNET LAWYERMAN QC.

If it wasn't you, I'm not surprised.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:58, Reply)

Nothing can ever beat igor
Or police dog.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:02, Reply)

igor was cool.
so was police dog.
but which one was best. there is only one was to find out...

AN INDEPENDENT ENQUIRY
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:04, Reply)

I don't think I've ever had a sock puppet account that I haven't made explicitely clear was me.
I mean, me and Two Hats fucked about a bit with the previous Personality Horse account, but I think it was still clear it was at least me.

The Personality Horse accounts were supposed to be so that we could promote Personality Horse stuff on links. I ego-searched one day and saw that a couple of people over here were still pissing and moaning about me all these years after the baldmonkey account was banned from QOTW. So I came over to entertain myself by being a prick. Personality Horse got banned. In the mean time, I noticed there were some decent folk over here these days. Monty and battered for instance. So with this new account, I've come over to not be a prick.

And they all lived happily ever after the end.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:04, Reply)

Is that a Bing Crosby song?
I like that sit-com he does where he is a doctor with a cute family. And his sweaters.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:06, Reply)

No. It is an ALF Garnett song.
ALF Garnett was a puppet alien star of a sitcom in which he comes to earth to live with a typical English family of racist old bastards.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:08, Reply)

plus, you don't need to constantly be here.
I did point out on several occasions you used to be funny before epic waki cuntery seemed to take over.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:06, Reply)

i was never funny. i've checked.

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:07, Reply)

Look.
Here's an early example of my "wit":
207.44.242.20/talk/173847
I'd love to go back and kick my fucking teeth in.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:24, Reply)

personality baldbadger

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 13:58, Reply)

personalitupid fat baldbagdger

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:05, Reply)

After discovering B69 wasa a badger too
I decided to join the trend. I for one welcome our new badger overlords.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:07, Reply)

Worst reason ever.
;)
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:18, Reply)

I get bored easily and change superficial things like hair colour and username.
I would call this a "Bowiesque" trait but I fear it would summon Monty .
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:24, Reply)

I just meant that you won't do your credibility much good quoting me as an influence.
Or something.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:31, Reply)

Credibility? Wossat?
I give not one fuck.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:41, Reply)

Well that's gonna be just grand then ;)
Welcome to the club!
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 16:23, Reply)

Nothing, I am very happy currently!
Alt: The lunch I just had. Payday chippy run, I am very full, and very happy about it.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:03, Reply)

*smugly happy fives*

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:08, Reply)

Woo!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:09, Reply)

Alt:
My dad just phoned me saying he's got us all tickets for Chelsea away on Boxing Day. Complete surprise and there was no way I could afford a ticket myself seeing as they're fucking £55 each. I love going to football with my dad and brother.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:11, Reply)

Got your outfit planned?

( girlinthehole, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:12, Reply)

He's going to steal his dads coat.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:16, Reply)

I reckon it's too far away for him to plan.
He might find the perfect item in the pre-christmas sales though.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:34, Reply)

Just bumped into an old friend in town
who took the time to tell me that I am now a much better dancer than he is.

That was nice.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:12, Reply)

You know he was just trying to get in your pants, don't you?
I assume he succeeded?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:13, Reply)

A gentleman never tells, b3th
I will, though; yep
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:19, Reply)

What ho Darth.
Life good?
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:26, Reply)

None too shabby, thank you sir
That said my boss is shortly to sit at my desk for training purposes, likely curtailing all b3ta fun for the rest of the day.

Hope you're well
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 25 Nov 2011, 14:31, Reply)