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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I have a teensy bit of a hangover.
How are you this fine (!) day?

There's some soggy snow coming down but it won't settle. Why is it that whenever it's wet or snowy I find myself in sneakers with fucking great holes in?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 8:48, 144 replies, latest was 14 years ago)
I wish I had a hangover.
Instead I have a cold. Pants. I'm going christmas shopping at lunchtime so that'll be hell. My mate's buying me a McDonalds for lunch though so it's not all good.
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Fri 16 Dec 2011, 8:51, Reply)
You don't need enemies

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 8:53, Reply)
I've never had a burger in MaccyD's.
I'm tempted by the chicken. What about the beef? OMG the choices.
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Fri 16 Dec 2011, 8:58, Reply)
Eat nothing, avoid eye contact, leave.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 8:59, Reply)
Never?
Well you have to have a Big Mac then, just so you can have the 'Oh, this is lovely'...wait five minutes 'Oh, I feel a bit sick now' experience that so many people know so well.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:00, Reply)
Fuck that, it's the Festive Deluxe.
Contains "A slice of cheese made with Emmental". Awesome. www.mcdonalds.co.uk/food/beef/festive-deluxe.mcdj
Or do I go all Tarantino tribute and have a Royale with Cheese?
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:02, Reply)
No!
From experience I can tell you that whenever McDonald's puts a 'special' on the menu it is invariably shit. You don't even get the 'oh, this is lovely' part of the experience, you go straight to the 'oh, I feel a bit sick'.

But, you know, do what you want. Just don't crying to me later...
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:03, Reply)
Hmmm, maybe the chicken.
www.mcdonalds.co.uk/food/chicken/chicken-fiesta.mcdj?dnPos=0
OH THE CHOICES
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:04, Reply)
That looks horrendous at this time of morning.

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:12, Reply)
I have never eaten a Big Mac
I once had the veggie burger they introduced about 15 years ago. It was shit.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:02, Reply)
Their vegeburgers are alright these days, I have one occasionally.
Oh, ok, I have had a burger in MaccyD's. Just not a meaty one.
(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:03, Reply)
I think vegetarians are excused from eating Big Macs
on the grounds that their fragile gay stomachs couldn't handle it.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:04, Reply)
They had just started springing up everywhere before I became a vegetarian
But we were far too middle class to ever visit such an establishment (there was even a successful campaign in my area to prevent one being opened.)
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:09, Reply)
Ha. Basildon welcomed them with open arms.
I'm fairly sure they rolled up their sleeves and helped with the building just to get it ready sooner.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:10, Reply)
*teensy hangover highfives*
I'm in a bad mood but only because my family think I've been in a bad mood.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 8:53, Reply)
Ha.
As Jon Richardson has it:

"What's the matter with you?"
"nothing"
"Honestly, what's the matter?"
"Nothing"
"Really, what's the matter with you?"
"Well, now? You."
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 8:55, Reply)
Exactly!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 8:56, Reply)
I have a hangover
And a cold. But you know what...

I don't care. I really don't.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:00, Reply)
^ punk is still alive, ladies and gentlemen

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:04, Reply)
Is your phone broken
You cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:08, Reply)
It is.
I was on the phone to Lusty yesterday afternoon and it just died completely.

Not working at all - it's still under warranty so they are changing it today but I will lose some hilarious video footage of Len which makes me feel very sad. All the pictures are held elsewhere though so not a total disaster.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)
Because you are a poor ragamuffin who only owns shoes with fucking great holes in
It's wetter than a hen party at a Chippendales show in Norwich today. Also; freezing. Why isn't it snowing?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:04, Reply)
Because snow only falls when it's slightly above freezing.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:05, Reply)
I don't think my opinion of "freezing" can be taken as any kind of barometer
My logic is as follows; December, pre-Christmas + rain + cold = snow. Or at least it fucking should.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:06, Reply)
You just made that up, didn't you?

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:15, Reply)
No.
Saw it on QI I think.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:17, Reply)
In their general ignorance round then.
Of course snow can fall below freezing. Otherwise it wouldn't snow in...well...huge parts of the world where it snows.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:19, Reply)
I'm off to The Lake District in 4 hours time.
Where it is actually snowing proper, real, settling snow.

I can't wait. Assuming the snow doesn't give Virgin Trains an excuse to shut down for the day.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:05, Reply)
That sounds brilliant mate
Hope the view of whichever bit of English countryside your train gets stuck in for three hours because of a bit of snow is pretty.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:08, Reply)
If I can get past Lancaster before that happens, I'll be happy with the view.
Apart from the fact that I've just realised it will be dark, so that's no good.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:11, Reply)
Pop out of the train and set fire to something
WIN
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:15, Reply)
I really like Lancaster.
Despite it being in the shitty north.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:25, Reply)
Yeah, it's alright there.
It's not a fun station to be hanging around when you've got 45 minutes between trains mind you.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:28, Reply)
Go through to Oxenholme and wait outside of Kendal
Or alternatively go through to Carnforth and have a coffee in the cafe where Brief Encounter was filmed...

Top Northern tips here folks.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:32, Reply)
I can't do either.
I know the journey well, I've done it loads, but I'm going to Ulverston, so I need to change at Preston or Lancaster depending what train I get out of Euston so Oxenholme is no good and you can't get to Carnforth without making the same change at Preston or Lancaster anyway.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:33, Reply)
Well thats shite...
I suggest you go back and hide in The Knares...

(Basildon reference right there folks)
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:35, Reply)
Hahahahaha.
The Knares needs knocking down and replacing with, well, pretty much anything would be an improvement. They could have picked up Dale Farm and put it in The Knares and it would have raised the average socio-economic grade a level.

(apologies Uncle Pete and Auntie Belinda).
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:40, Reply)
Ah happy times
It is so shite that I no longer live there, and have to put up with living in the Lake District
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:44, Reply)
That is the exact same move I'm contemplating making if I can find work up there.

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:54, Reply)
What do you do?
Apart from not a lot and fuck about on here?
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:04, Reply)
I've very carefully not said what I do on here and I'm not going to change that now...

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:09, Reply)
Fair play...
I was going to see if I could point you in the right direction...

I would do the same
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:47, Reply)
Are all Basildonians drawn to the Lake District then?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:56, Reply)
fortunately I was only there for a while
I would love to say I am proudly from Sarfend, but that is nothing to be proud of
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:05, Reply)
It is compared to Basildon.
I actually really like Southend. I'd happily live in Leigh at least.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:10, Reply)
I think most Basildonians are drawn to anywhere that's not Basildon.
I escaped to London for years but got drawn back. It's like Carlito's Way.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:10, Reply)
Without wanting to piss on your lovingly prepared chips
It really isnt snowing up here in the frozen and backward north...
Little bit on the ground but nothing worth hiding the body of a frozen tramp in.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:30, Reply)
Care to make a guess as to the result tomorrow?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:09, Reply)
Yes and no
Yes I'll make a guess and no I don't want to. You'll batter us.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:10, Reply)
I have no hangover
I'm on a nice dry bus and I wrapped my last present last night and for the first christmas I can remember I'm not even overdrawn.

Let the hate bigin.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:05, Reply)
*jumps queue*
Actually I'm not overdrawn either.

/notallowedanoverdraftlolz
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:06, Reply)
*Not allowed an overdraft high-fives*

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:07, Reply)
*joins in*
*gets left hanging*
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:11, Reply)
WooT!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:11, Reply)
you been learnin silly words from that there Cavey
Mornin Beej
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)
Morning Mr Q.
Woot means Yay!
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:17, Reply)
I know what it means, I still thing you caught it off Cavey
In other news: Yay! Elastica on my MP3 player.

And yes Monty, I know and I don't care.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:19, Reply)
*dances*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:22, Reply)
and now we have Ty Cobb
Awsome song. *bus-boogies*
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:25, Reply)
*Bigins hatin'*

(TheColonel, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:14, Reply)
YEAH
Stupid fat gay cunt pantomime twat
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)
That's a lot of hate.
Has he done something to wrong you personally?
(TheColonel, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:17, Reply)
Not apart from all the sodomy, but I rather enjoyed that
Hey, this was your idea. I was just joining in to try and feel like I belonged.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:18, Reply)
I object to allegations of pantomine.
Morning hun
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:17, Reply)
Morning sweetums
Are you well?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:19, Reply)
Fine thanks
Awaiting my inevitable christmas cold, but no sign of it yet. I want snow.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:20, Reply)
I want enough snow to be pretty
but not enough to interfere with a) the trains or b) my delicate sense of balance, as either could royally fuck up my Christmas. That said, apparently we're taking Ms Foxtrot's niece and nephews ice skating on Saturday. I might run a pool on which part of me I break.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:23, Reply)
Frenulum

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:25, Reply)
Lol

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:31, Reply)
Waiting, waiting
Mrs Dupinblue was due to give birth last week. The lazy cow still hasn't, so today when I go out for my work Christmas lunch I am going to have to remain sober. This is shit.
Day to day I can avoid/ignore everyone at work by staying in my office and being aloof with anyone who comes in, but today I'll be stuck at a dining table with them as they get drunk.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:05, Reply)
What a selfish bitch.
You should punch her in her milky tits.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:06, Reply)
*squirty doink*

(NoeI «:::P:::» «:::E:::» «:::R:::» «:::V:::» «:::E:::», Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:08, Reply)
The poor child
It will never have a proper birthday. Selfish bastards the pair of you.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:13, Reply)
I'm going to call it Jesus and tell it that everyone is celebrating its birthday.
Not sure how this fits in with my fervent atheism.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:22, Reply)
I am hungover to fuck
I think I managed 8 pints of Stella and a bottle of red last night. I need bacon
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:09, Reply)
you need better taste in beer is what you need.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:14, Reply)
I don't understand why people drink Stella.
Is it just the macho stigma associated with it?
It tastes horrendous.

Give me a nice pint of Skol any day.
(TheColonel, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:16, Reply)
Oh, TheColonel.
Thank heavens you're joking about the Skol.

There are worse lagers than Stella - Red Stripe, for example, is barely even a beer. It's a repulsive chemical approximation of it. Foul.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:19, Reply)
Jamaica's finest export I'll have you know.
I thought you of all people would know that.
(TheColonel, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:21, Reply)
Seriously though, a local discotheque sells this by the can.
And the droves of plebeians guzzle it down.

Ugh.
(TheColonel, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:23, Reply)
Ugh,
They should stick to marijuana production and jerk spice rubs.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:27, Reply)
Clubs are the only place I've ever seen it sold I think.
I used to drink it at whatever that all night Indie club in the LA2 was called as it was the cheapest beer they sold.

And, frankly, I was never that fussy about what I drank anyway.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:27, Reply)
I think I've drunk it under similar circumstancesSometimes it's the only beer
*sadface*
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:29, Reply)
I used to love Red Stripe.
No surprises there then.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:21, Reply)
this is not a defence
There are also many many better beers
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:22, Reply)
There are indeed
but at least Stella is a clean, properly-brewed beer. Its loutish reputation is a little unfair.

Those of us of a, err, certain age will remember their old ad slogan 'reassuringly expensive'.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:28, Reply)
which I always thought clashed with my opinion of it as cheap pisswater
I'm not a lagar man as a rule, so what lagar I drink I am picky about. Peroni I like and Moretti ans Staropramen, 'scuse spellin, on my phone
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:32, Reply)
Staropramen I find to be a bit too dark and smelly, same with Kronenbourg.
Peroni is great, I also love Asahi but Kirin Ichiban is the best lager I've ever had.

I do like a brown beer or two in winter, but on a hot summer's day I do love a chilled lager.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:35, Reply)
I used to think that about beer on a summer's day
But then I discovered golden ales (such as this beauty: www.williamsbrosbrew.com/contemporaryales.php?id=38#top), and no longer subject myself to that gassy misery.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:39, Reply)
you have a good point
Well done hippy.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:40, Reply)
see, I'm like this in reverse
I mostly drink brown beer, but on a hot day I'll drink Lager.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:39, Reply)
And this is in reverse, how?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:41, Reply)
he drinks lager, but with the occasional brown beer when it's cold
I drink brown beer but with the occasional lager when it's hot. Do keep up.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:56, Reply)
So you both drink beer and enjoy lager on a hot day
Another devastating b3tan intellectual is in the party house
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:06, Reply)

in reverse
(TheColonel, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:43, Reply)
Not hungover but was making boozy chocs this morning and may have eaten a bit for quality control.
Hic.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:14, Reply)
SNOW!
I'm off to shoot elephants.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:15, Reply)
Ours is melting

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:17, Reply)
Where do you live, Personality Horse?
Just generally, I'm not inviting myself round or anything.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:18, Reply)
DON'T TELL 'IM, PIKE!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:19, Reply)
He only wants to come round for a bath...

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:24, Reply)
Monty:
www.thewoodmovie.com/images/cache/screen_image_105595.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:30, Reply)
In about 20 years that will be him
If he can afford the hat
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:35, Reply)
I'm being bullied!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:36, Reply)
Look at the name of the soap powder and all!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:37, Reply)
hahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:03, Reply)
I thought I was being quite complimentary
By giving you 20 years. Given a shave and a haircut and a bowlre hat the resemblance is uncanny
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:37, Reply)
What sort of person does not know that Personality Horse are a Portsmouth based band?

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:37, Reply)
I grew up in Winchester,
and thus turn my posh nose up at your smelly town.

Does it still reek of shit when the tide goes out?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:53, Reply)
Fuck yeah.

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:56, Reply)
What, no marzipan?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:21, Reply)
Gloria Estefan

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:24, Reply)
Belle and Sebastian

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:25, Reply)
Belle and Sebastian

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:27, Reply)
Bob Marley was a rastaman.

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:29, Reply)
Overcook your pasta, man

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:31, Reply)
Carl Lewis was a faster man.

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:34, Reply)
How's your chronic asthma, Nan?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:35, Reply)
Joins in
I once had sex in an Astra Van
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:36, Reply)
I film penne on my pasta-cam

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:37, Reply)
Don't tell them your master-plan

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:38, Reply)
Can you lend us a gasper, pam?

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:39, Reply)
No babies; I'm a jasper, Fran.

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:44, Reply)
you mean Jaffa, man.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:54, Reply)
So I do. What a stinking gash I am.

(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:57, Reply)
is it too snowy out for me to fly my chopper?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:38, Reply)
That's how Mike cunting Smith nearly killed Sarah Greene and mashed up her pelvis

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:40, Reply)
WHAT A PRICK
was she the one from alive and kicking?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:47, Reply)
mind you, i'd have smashed her pelvis given half a chance

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:05, Reply)
So would my dad.
he called Mike Smith a prick forever more after that.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:40, Reply)
Because you are a tramp
i got 10 hours sleep last night, but I'm still knackered, I'm guessing it's ME
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:40, Reply)

E S

I got there two mixed up once and told a gut just diagnosed with MS to suck it up and get over it.

Luckily he was a cunt
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:44, Reply)
Someone helpful on the radio the other day suggested a large percentage of teenagers have ME
that's why they are so lethargic and lazy
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:46, Reply)
a lot of teenagers have you?
you fucken dirty paedo cunt
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:15, Reply)
First song my We7 playlist has conjured for me today
is Suicide Commando's charming paean to tolerance and love, "Die Motherfucker Die". Which would have been perfect yesterday or the day before, but today I'm in a really good mood.

Why hasn't someone invented an incredibly lazy device like a mood-detecting iPod?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:44, Reply)
There's an app for it on Android
*smugs*
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 9:54, Reply)
Ah, but, you have to suffer the ignominy of having an Android phone
Which makes you bent.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:07, Reply)
I am also slightly hungover.
Despite being unemployed scum, however, I am unable to languish in bed sleeping it off as I have to be awake for when the electrician comes fifteen minutes ago to fit the oven that was delivered yesterday.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:13, Reply)
MANFAIL

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:19, Reply)
It's an electric oven Rory.
It's replacing a shit gas one, therefore it needs wired in. I'm not a qualified electrician.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:43, Reply)
work christmas party last night, think i might be dying
although some bright spark has brought cheese instead of chocolate for her birthday treats. so i am going to cure the hangover with delicious offensive stilton.

the ex just sent me a link to a song he thought i might like. by dj eternity. called "you belong to me". i am torn between laughing and crying at how anybody could miss the connotations of this!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:33, Reply)
sounds delibertae and creepy
my xmas do is tonight too, where are you off anywhere nice?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:34, Reply)
nah
it's no deeper than "i liked this song, what do you think?"

last night was clerkenwell house. tonight is my friend's engagement party. and i hate her fiance. oh well.

where is yours?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:39, Reply)
Am I in some parallel universe?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 16 Dec 2011, 10:54, Reply)

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