Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Well it looks like Jeff killed OTTomorrow I go back to work at my former employment, only to help see.
It will be grand to be smug and all neener neener since the guy that took my job lasted about 3months.
When were you last all smug and neener neener?
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Lisette von Falcon, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 3:39,
181 replies,
latest was 14 years ago)
'When were you last all smug and neener neener?'Just last week - on Friday actually. I too went back to my ex-employer and saw some old colleagues, all of whom now know that, although I was made redundant, I've returned to the same industry in a national role with a very substantial payrise (and a better car).
I'm also just about to swan off with their biggest customer. Shame.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 8:13, Reply)
No matter how many times you post this you still come across as a prick(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 8:24,
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Starting the week as you intend to go on eh?(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 8:28,
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If it carries on like this I'll delete my account and kill myself(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 8:32,
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There are others who should do so before you. Too early in the day to name names though...(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 8:38,
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Everyone's frightened of you naming namesIT'S ALRIGHT PEOPLE NOBODY EVER NAMES NAMES ON HERE IT'S ALL USELESS HYPERBOLE YOU CAN COME OUT NOW
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:03,
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Riding the cotton pony again Rory?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:45,
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I bet you work as an estate agent.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:09,
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When my impression of an ambulance was better than everyone else's.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:08,
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It's not going to get better than this today, ladies and gentlemenLeave the internet, do not stop to pick up your belongings.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:28,
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This weekend just goneI won 3 games of "James Bond Scene It!" on the trot.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:11, Reply)
Was this success tainted a littleby your failure to wash and dress all weekend?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:33,
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Wash AND dress on a weekend?You posh cunt
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:44,
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I will have you know I showered more than usual this weekend.A whole ONCE.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:56, Reply)
I often have to engage "croissant" mode in workI am normally quite good at foreseeing when something is going to go tits and why. Trouble is, when this is pointed out ahead of time, no-one does anything about it, hence the need to occasionally lean back on my balcony and quaff wine
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:18,
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Last time I was at the supermarket.My son decried in a loud voice to me that we were not buying any junk food and he was looking forward to having his fresh tuna steak with butternut squash and cabbage, as the cake and pie masses wobbled around the place.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:25,
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Was this when you were forcibly evicted from Scotland?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:27,
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hey man, not cool. the clearances still hurt.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:27,
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Do you have one of those posh Scottish accents like Ronnie Corbett?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:32,
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If you like.More Rab C than Ronnie I'd say.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:44,
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I thought you were one of those filthy wop typesI imagined you to have an accent like Sean Connery playing the title role in "Berlusconi; a tale of coitus and corruption".
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:48, Reply)
I was imagining Armando IannucciOnly shorter.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:49,
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you love it darth, admit it.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:55,
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part wop, sound like filth wrapped in shortbread.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:53,
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At least I can support one team that won't finish last :'((
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:01,
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I'd go with ItalyAt least they're new enough to the Six Nations to have an excuse
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:06, Reply)
You're too late TrotterEveryone has deleted their accounts and killed themselves.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:41,
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Just you and me then TanglesIn the Kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man can play some brilliant practical jokes
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:44, Reply)
Just one more thing...(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:47,
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If I ever needed a ruthless, clever detectiveHe'd be the one-eyed get
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:48,
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\o/09:52 on a Monday has to be a new record
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:52,
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or can have a wank wherever he wants(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:48,
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Morning DarthI await AA's arrival so I can point and laugh
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:43,
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Morning mateWho do you fancy to go down? I think it's fairly safe to say that you're out of it now... my proclamation, about a month ago, that Blackburn are "irredeemably fucked" is looking slightly dicey now.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:45, Reply)
I said in work that Blackburn will not be relegated, just to spite the fans hating KeanHe is doing a canny job with a fucking dire squad.
I fancy Wolves, Wigan and maybe Bolton. Any team who bought N'Gog on purpose desrve to go down
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:47,
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Liverpool bought him on purpose too.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:49,
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Yeah, but that could be "for future greatness"Bolton saw him "play" in the Premier League
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:50,
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I'd love to say "I told you so"but the fat lass hasn't had enough WKD to hit the karaoke yet.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:57,
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I never doubted it would go to the wire mateIt's around this time of year that the press comes over all unnecessary that Ferguson has got his squad firing on all cylinders at just the right time. Even though he does it EVERY FUCKING YEAR. Which is how they keep winning stuff. It's not rocket surgery.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:59, Reply)
It's hard to argue with them factsKean's getting more flack than he deserves just because the fans see him as a Venky's puppet. Alex McCleish on the other hand is a useless shitehawk.
Wolves fo sho now I reckon. Bolton because they don't have any goalscorers. I reckon Hughes will pull QPR out of it at the last so it's between Wigan and Blackbrun.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:51, Reply)
I think they should all try to score more goals than they concede.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:52,
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Tangles is Alex Ferguson?More Kevin Keegan actually
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:53,
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wigan are like an ugly spotty teenager. couldn't score in a brothel with 50 quid wrapped round his cock.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:56,
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I'm not sure why but I always find myself rooting for Wigan when the annual relegation scrap loomsReally I should be hoping they get relegated so Martinez can make a go of being a proper, grown-up manager
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:57, Reply)
they are proper shit but at least they try.wolves, fuck me they are dull.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:02,
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They're knackered this timeSacking McCarthy was only a good idea as long as they had someone lined up to steady the ship, all they've done is trim the wage bill.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:03, Reply)
That's what I want you to think Mumps ;-)Were there rumours of my untimely demise? Because I refuse to believe anyone would be that arsed.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 9:46, Reply)
I was smug, seeing Scotland beaten by Ireland this weekend.I'm a Scot, and know that they get fucked at everything. So when my compatriots and family tell me, yes, they'll do it this time, I feel smug, knowing , no, they'll get fucked, but do it with a certain style, and hospitalise a few of the opposing team too.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:02, Reply)
ANOTHER Scot?No offence mate but I'm pretty sure Mumps has taken us over the limit already, I'm arranging to have some of his limbs removed to better fit the permitted quota.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:05, Reply)
I lost my legs in the 'stan darth.why you got to bring this up? not cool bro.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:08,
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*searches Google maps for a part of Glasgow ending in 'stan**gives up*
Awwwwww
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:09, Reply)
it's glasgowstani now, stop being racist.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:10,
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this shocking stereotype makes me want to stab you in the face.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:13,
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Bring it on, bitchI had a Phall the other night, I feel manlier than I have for months
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:14, Reply)
hahahahahahahaa!!!Brilliant!
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:19,
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I'm off out on Saturday for spicy nomsEDIT: Here
www.valleyrestaurants.co.uk
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:19,
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That was my one treat this month, tightening the belt etcOn the upside am getting pretty good at home-made curry. The trick is to make it so spicy that the missus won't eat it.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:22, Reply)
hahaha!Good plan
I am out with a Mr Paul Daniels and his lovely wife for this curry
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:24,
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You'll like thisNot a lot, but you'll like it.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:28,
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I hope to like it a lotThat restaurant is the best Indians in Newcastle
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:31,
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It had better be at those prices(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:36,
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Start a new one thenThread, not life
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:05,
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All I've currently got to talk aboutIs the car part I've just ordered. Hardly thread-worthy stuff. Although I did make a girl hate my guts after only having met me twice.
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Kroney, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:10,
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This deserves moreTell the group
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:12,
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It took her two meetings? wow, quite the tolerant type then.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:12,
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Isn't it. It was a case of she was interested, I *really* wasn't.Attempts at polite extraction failed, extremely aggressive texts followed. I feared for my rabbits.
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Kroney, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:15,
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oh dear, tha bad eh?I hope you didn't shag her, they go fucking mental if you shag them then tell them to fuck off.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:16,
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I did notThe world's most unenthusiastic kiss was plenty. It was visibly cringing when it happened.
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Kroney, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:20,
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Klingons are fucking awful(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:20,
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I fucking love star wars!(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:20,
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Have you tried moist toilet paper?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:29,
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I have never done such a thing I am a gentleman.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:21, Reply)
I see what you've done hereFuture reference; "spill your guts" is a euphemism
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:13, Reply)
he was a showgirl(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:14,
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i don't think thats the next line, thanks for ruining my day sportscow(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:16, Reply)
It's fun to stay at the ...(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:22,
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Any cunt can MerengueNo technique whatsoever, it's even easier than Salsa. Basically this broad is not all that.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:26, Reply)
Salsa is much more difficultOr a merengue?
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:29,
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Salsa's harder than Merengue cos the leads are more complicatedBoth are an absolute piece of piss compared to Ballroom. Anyone who tells you otherwise is a liar.
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:37, Reply)
I think we're alone nowThe beating of our hearts is the only sound
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:55, Reply)
whatwaht top ho!everything hunky dorey in hetville, how the devil is the situation back in gayton?
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those damn russkies took constantinople, foxtrotthank the almighty for those plucky french
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:22, Reply)
How many times have their valiant rearguard actions saved us?I think that brings us up to... one!
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:24, Reply)
i wouldn't say saved, more redistributed a little bit of wealth and power from those barbaric ottomans(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:25, Reply)
Your valiant rearguard actions are more than one, surely?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:25,
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They're more deterrents distributed by word-of-mouth than actions at this pointI say word-of-mouth, I mean graffiti
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:27, Reply)
aww wicked cool!I like to do bunny hops and endo's on my bmx.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:20,
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oh man i wish i could do an endomum won't even let me out without a helmet :(
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:22, Reply)
come round to mine, mum never checks once I'm out.I just asked and she said we can have tizer and crips too!!!!!
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:27,
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I thought you'd be a Blood(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:29,
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oh boy, this is going to be awesome.we can play batman on the xbox and if you can stay over we can do camping in the garden!!!
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:30,
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waitwaitwaitwaitBatman, or Lego Batman? I ain't allowed to play violant games
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:31, Reply)
Well I ain't gonna tell on you but I have both.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:34,
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i don't know which is more violantin real batman you kill people but in lego batman you hit them til the explode into peieces, i might not come around after all
sorry for messign you around
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:38, Reply)
aww man sadtimes :'(still, I get to have crips and tizer!
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:39,
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woohoo!oh wait, the new tizer that tastes like fizzy piss or the proper tizer thwey had back in 1998?
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:40, Reply)
you can still get real tizer online, along with proper sweets.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:43,
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OMFG :OOOOOI'll be there after school, meet you by the gates. You'll know me by my headbrace
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:45, Reply)
Only witty and charming(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:21,
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A man walks down the streetHe says why am I soft in the middle now
(ombabba-OM)
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:29, Reply)
not smug todaymade myself very ill this weekend. this morning is a struggle.
last time i was smug? some dull work-related tale that happened on friday, which will HOPEFULLY save my client about £1M. but we'll see.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:22,
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This is the problem with arse to mouth, the risk of infection is quite high(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:27,
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Apparently it is OK if it it the same person(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 11:00,
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You have lost all vodka tolerance is whyYou fool
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:27,
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yesit turns out that if you eat nothing on saturday, drink a metric fuckton of vodka, then get up on sunday and eat the first piece of pizza you've had since december, you will spend the next 24 hours throwing up.
i'd do it again though. great weekend.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:42,
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Your guts must be in shockEAT SOMETHING YOU MUPPET
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:57,
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i don't get why fat people think not eating will make them thinit doesn't
(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:59, Reply)
I knowLook at the fucking kites on all those Ethiopians
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 11:00,
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Morning you flange of fetid fanny flapsThe mist has cleared and it is sunny in london town, I have a very busy week ahead, so I'd better crack on.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:24,
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It was fucking lovely yesterday!Went down to the seafront for a wander and played on all the 2p machines
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:28,
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Giving them a dehumanising nickname doesn't lessen their parents' pain(, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 10:34, Reply)
When humidity has reached more than 100% and the water starts to appear as vapourBut that's not important right not
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Mar 2012, 11:02,
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