Time for a new thread; Relationships:
Best? Worst? Why?*
Marriage? Do you believe in the principal of it?

Alt: Worst restaurant experience?

*Note to Swipe - this is not yet another opportunity for you to moan about the homo.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:19, 96 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I am married to my university "sweetheart"
Never really had a proper girlfriend before that.

Alt: Wimpey
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:21, Reply)

So you married the first one you found as you realised you're so ugly you'd never find another one.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)

you're my wife now!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:26, Reply)

This is pretty much how it went

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:27, Reply)

I've been thinking about marriage more and more.
I don't see why I need to get married to the partner but I'm thinking I'd quite like to.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)

It's worth it so you don't have to say "partner"
which makes you sound like a gay, business partners or a nonce
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:28, Reply)

Take up dancing with your girlfriend
that way it works on two levels
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:29, Reply)

I like that about it :'(

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:30, Reply)

i'm not against the idea of marrigae, but weddings can fuck off
i see no reason to blow thousands of pounds on a party just to say i love the woman
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:29, Reply)

very much this.
we'd probably just pop to the registry office then get pissed down the duck.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:30, Reply)

i like the idea of hand fasting

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:30, Reply)

what?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:32, Reply)

a pagan marriage ceremony where you get your hands tied together
doesn't need to be done in a church or any of that, could jsut invite a few people and have a nice day
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)

fair enough.
we're not into religion and that so it's just signing the docs for us really.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:34, Reply)

can i be best man?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:37, Reply)

YES!!! wow, this is turning out to be one great day!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:41, Reply)

My wife and I had to get married in a cathedral, despite not being religious, as her mother is an Elder of the church and would have been very upset if we hadn't.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:37, Reply)

See, this is the sort of thing that puts me off
I don't see why it's any business of anyone's other than the people getting married. Your beliefs trump hers. Should I have religious children, I would far rather that they gert married I the way that makes them happy, rather than attempt to satisfy my beliefs.
( Kroney, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:41, Reply)

Our view was that we wanted to get married and weren't too bothered where (more interested in the reception venue) and as it meant a lot to her mother then why not.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:43, Reply)

my dad is a priest.
fuck religion and fuck what other people want.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:41, Reply)

my mate's bf's ma recently found god and is insisting on doing their wedding ceremony
they're not even engaged. he HATES this for many reasons.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:43, Reply)

Best was Anna
Met her through a friend, we hit it off quite quickly. Ended up snogging her mate by accident the first time we got together, she laughed about the misunderstanding, when I explained it months later, at that point I knew I was 'in love' (I was 16, so not really). I was with her when I moved from Skelmersdale, and she managed to keep me sane when I was having real problems with the new area and new people, etc. We lived miles apart, but her Mum couldn't have been more accommodating, picking me up from the station, home, etc. Whilst Anna was at college/dancing, her Mum and I would go out shopping, we'd cook together, it was awesome. Truth be told, if it wasn't for her Mum, I don't think we'd have lasted half as long as we did.

Worst - Charlotte.
Lovely girl, absolutely filthy in bed, great fun. However, she was suspicious, liked trying to play mind games, whined a lot, wanted everything her own way, etc etc. We're friends now, it's far easier than being together.

I believe in marriage, I think it's an excellent idea. See family, have lovely day, get hammered.

Alt: Before christmas, I went out for a meal with work. The meal was spectacular, absolutely fantastic. The reason it was a bad experience is that I brought the food back up about half an hour later, not happy about that.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)

i think we might have known the same charlotte

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)

If you're as old as you claim to be, I certainly hope not, as she's younger than me.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:34, Reply)

i had no idea she was as young as she turned out to be at the time
she'd be early twenties now, 23 maybe?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:35, Reply)

21 now, I think

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:37, Reply)

i'm trying to think back to how long ago vs how old she would be and i'm coming up blank
we're taking about a fairly short, sweet looking girl, dark hair, pale skin, blue eyes, currently engaged to a bloke possibly called adam?
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:39, Reply)

Nope, she's single, brown eyes, and bright red hair

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:40, Reply)

sounds like a right twat

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:50, Reply)

Yep

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:53, Reply)

*stalks AA's FB friends*

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:30, Reply)

Hooray!
Yes, I believe in marriage. Quite strongly, as it happens. Which I suppose is a bit odd as I don't believe in religion at all. As an institution though, it should be respected.

I'll avoid answering the other questions in order to keep the Star Trek gags to a minimum. I'm considerate like that.
( Kroney, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:26, Reply)

best is probably the one i'm in now
its just very grown up, quite relaxed and everything is doen on mutual terms, plus she's dead sweet and caring and patient and that. We did discuss marriage yesterday tho, i'm definitely not up for that again.

worst was a single mum i was seeing years back, proper nutcase who started arguments over everything and couldn't get through a day without some massive drama

i don't think i've ever really had a bad restaurant experience, but i did walk out of a restaurant in richmond once cos i'd waited half an hour and all they'd managed to do was take my order and bring me a drink
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:27, Reply)

i've never dated a homosexual and moved and stored all of his stuff then allowed him to treat me like crap tho
swings and roundabouts
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:28, Reply)

how long was the first marriage Q?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:29, Reply)

4 years too long
but we both moved on to better, happier relationships. no bitterness
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:30, Reply)

that's good to hear.
I guess it makes it easier if you ain't got kids, I've assumed you don't have kids.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:31, Reply)

yeah we don't, she does now
i think we were just too young, she had a lot of unrealistic expectations of marriage.

The reality isn't all sunshine and candy floss
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:32, Reply)

+bus

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)

PCA

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:34, Reply)

I wish I had some candy floss :(

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:35, Reply)

wanna come to the fair?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)

boy, do I ever!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)

Worst - she who shall forever be known as The Biter
She did fuck me about quite a lot as well, but I principally remember her teeth.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:29, Reply)

+ing
NONCE!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:29, Reply)

Very good
*applauds politely*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:30, Reply)

vagina dentata
*shudders*
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:31, Reply)

Didn't get that far
I dread to think what she would have done to it. I bet her fanny drips battery acid
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:35, Reply)

OH MY GOD I'M SO HUNGRY
As you were
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:31, Reply)

Same, got home made lasagne and some steamed veg for lunch though, woo hoo!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:32, Reply)

You can both fuck off
It's not the lunch, it's the not snacking and failing at not thinking about lunch
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)

Haha
Also - https://twitter.com/#!/danroan/status/179892785409818624
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:37, Reply)

Can't decide to have chips, mash or roast potatoes with the gammon.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:38, Reply)

If the roasties are good, go for them.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:40, Reply)

I'm going to have roast gammon in the staff canteen today.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)

Never had a bad relationship, they've all been good in their own ways.
I like weddings and the idea, but not met anyone I'd consider marrying yet.
Bella Pasta.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:32, Reply)

Is that a pasta roll?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)

It's a fat Italian chick.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:34, Reply)

Ha!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:34, Reply)

Rape is not a relationship.
Not a long term one anyway.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)

i am going to reply to this with some hilarious lafter, but please be aware that it is purely sarcastic and i in no way find you amusing at all
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:38, Reply)

I don't care if I get married or not, apart from giving me a proper way to refer to the missus it doesn't seem to change much.
But I'd like to get married just so I can turn to any religious people and confirm that the gay couple across the street getting married has not, in point of fact, changed anything about the value of my own marriage so would they kindly fuck off and get their own house in order without interfering in anyone elses.

Oh, I forgot the alt: I ate pig trotters in a place in Tallin and, although the experiece itself was not unpleasant, the next 8 hours becoming intimately acquainted with the backs of various Tallin bar toilet doors was not fun.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:34, Reply)

I think the concept of gay people getting married
Is a rather nice one.
( Kroney, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:38, Reply)

I don't really feel any different about it to the way I do about any church wedding. It's not for me, but if you want it then you should be allowed it.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:39, Reply)

sadly it'll never happen :'(

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:42, Reply)

it can already up here.
just not in church.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:46, Reply)

you'll never get a gay marriage in a church.
it's against cannon law.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:47, Reply)

badum-tish

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:49, Reply)

i think cannons are just more of a BOOM
if yours also has a TISH, something's wrong with it
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:51, Reply)

it's got a puncture :(

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:54, Reply)

that's very sad

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:54, Reply)

I think we will get it. Eventually.
Canon law has to be subserviant to civil law, no? So a concerted campaign to get civil law changed to make it illegal for churches to refuse to marry on ground of sexuality could work.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:16, Reply)

It might but I fail to see why that's a good thing
I'm sure most of the Episcopal churches, CofE, etc will do it if they want eventually. Why force churces? as in, why would you want to get married in a place that doesn't want you? You don't have any legal right to marry in a church just because "it's pretty" .. you are obliged to at least pretend to follow the religion, for instance
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:27, Reply)

sadly no.
it matters little what the law says, a priest makes his vows to uphold canon law, so can't marry a gay couple.
unless canon law is changed then there isn't a way round this.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:27, Reply)

all my relationships have had great bits and sad bits
the main thing is to be fulfilled whether you're single or in a couple and not rely on someone else to make you happy, i think.

worst dates, however... that's a whole other story. being cheap/skanky and having shit manners are probably the biggest sins. luckily both the worst offenders were the same twat, so it can't get worse than that (or it hasn't yet).

worst restaurant experience - my own fault for being fussy, but places in spain that didn't do anything vegetarian, so i would end up with cold vegetables swimming in oil or a piece of bread.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:41, Reply)

ful
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:45, Reply)

it's not always about the food, AA

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:46, Reply)

i think he was thinking of his asshole

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:48, Reply)

all of mine have had their positive points.
yeah, I believe in the principle or else I wouldn't do it, but each to their own.

alt: curry house on the isle of wight. I don't think any more info should be needed.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 11:45, Reply)

my 'Nuff Said' detector is twitching...

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:19, Reply)

two boat crews, shit food, awful service
we were the only people in there and they still took 3 hours to produce food. We refused to pay and the owner literally kicked off. Great fun. Not.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:24, Reply)

Are you sure it wasn't in Torquay?

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:25, Reply)

nah, yarmouth on the IoW

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:28, Reply)

Good here, innit.

( Kroney, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:15, Reply)

I leave for 20 minutes and it all falls aparty

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:17, Reply)

Your birthdays must be dull if you think this is a party.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:20, Reply)

Best: Current.
Worst: None, genuinely. Even though my ex wife pissed me around at the end, up until then I was quite happy. Plus I get the last laugh, purely through still breathing.

I must believe in the principle of marriage since I've done it twice. Although I can't stand wedding cake.

Alt: at the Edinbash of 2009 I had the most insipid food I've ever tasted at a Greek restaurant just off Princes Street. It was dire. When asked if we'd enjoyed the meal the missus told the Greek waiter exactly what she thought, using his native tongue so he was under no illusion at just how bad it had been. I later found out that the restaurant had been used as a front for some major criminal activities and closed down.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:17, Reply)

Best is always the current one I find.
Worst would have to be my marriage (details probably still available on one QOTW posts) Breaifly summarised: Married a nutter 8 years younger than me (still managed to be her second husband) ignoring warning signes a blind man would have sen and promptly got her up- the duff and married her.

Oddly enough I'm not totally against marriage, but I have no interest in the paper work or ceremony, it should be between the people involved, a simple promise, I'd keep the legal side separate. I'd also make divorce easier.

Alt: I went to a little Chef once. I'd not have thou8ght, before that, that you could make a sausage inedible.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:18, Reply)

I do think that anyone who doesn't think their current relationship is their best
might want to question why they are actually in it at all.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:21, Reply)

Well, indeed.
They were all good at one point, but they also all went wrong for some reason (in my case a taste for nutters)and in retrospect were wrong. Current if definitely the best because I've not worked out what's wrong with her yet, so I can pretend there isn't anything.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:24, Reply)

Best relationship: Perhaps to be expected, but my current one. Early days though, but the signs look very good.
Worst relationship: 2 immediately spring to mind - my marriage (she was mental, lazy, controlling, and a fat munter), and my last relationship (she was mental, paranoid, humourless, controlling, clingy - but the sex was very good, not surprisingly - the mentals always are, aren't they?)

Marriage: tried it once before and certainly in no hurry to try it again. It does seem to work for some people, but for many it's absolute fucking torture - loveless, sex dries up, kids and finances the only thing stopping them splitting up, etc.

Worst Restaurant: a meal out for 4 just before Xmas. The service was terrible - it took us over an hour to get the starters, and we eventually went somewhere else for the main course.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:20, Reply)

Loosely related to the restaurant question
but why is it do people think it's ok to eat down the phone? What on Earth makes them think I want to listen to the sound of their chewing? It's vile. Unutterably vile.
( Kroney, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:32, Reply)

Alt: Off the top of my head, Ms Foxtrot's 21st birthday
Big family meal at a new Thai restaurant. Everything was going swimmingly until a chunk of unidentified meat surfaced in her soup. Nothing undermines confidence in a meal like a horde of suspicious vegetarians.

I ate the soup, obviously. It was a bad experience for her, not me.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:33, Reply)

Sorry, had to.
a chunk of unidentified +my
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:37, Reply)

Ah, the old "hole cut in the bottom of a soup bowl and restaurant table" gag
Always a classic.
( Kroney, Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:40, Reply)

It's worth getting a scalded cock, just to see the look on her face.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 14 Mar 2012, 12:43, Reply)