Stolen from reddit.
If you could pick one moment in your life where you could see your life Split into two timelines And get to watch the other play out, what moment or decision would you pick And change to see that timeline play out whilst still living your current?

Alt; vaginas
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 20:55, 94 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

I'd choose January 2002
and immediately divorce the arse off my ex wife and take her for every penny she had, rather than hanging around hoping she'd change her mind.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:01, Reply)

You go girlfriend.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:05, Reply)

Actually I might have held back on the divorce
and inherited her properties and lump sum pension when she died. Then married the missus.

20/20 hindsight.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:06, Reply)

Mine would be similar
leaving the stupid boyfriend long before he became the stupid husband. Probably about 2006. Preferably before.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:09, Reply)

or perhaps when I got my A levels
I did quite badly, but got a place at uni anyway. There was a moment when the woman on the phone hesitated before saying I still had a place. If it had been a no, I think my life would have been very very different
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:11, Reply)

Probably the moment right before logging in and reading this post.
Alt: Cunt
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:37, Reply)

everybody hates you tangles.
Because you get so angry, online.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:42, Reply)

I tried to convince the Mock Turtle you weren't Rory earlier
but my phone was dicking around and not posting comments. Evidently I am a terrible human being and a techno luddite to boot.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:46, Reply)

thanks D Jizzle
But it's kinda funny.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:48, Reply)

The thing is, you post more than Rory even when he's banned or nuts deep in a rent boy
so it doesn't follow that you're a Rorypuppet. The purpose of puppets is to come out of the woodwork every now and again to provoke a reaction, not to engage in general banter and stuff. Unless you're QuentinC.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:52, Reply)

Never a truer word spoken

(Craig Colclough I've been on the telly you know. And in the papers, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:54, Reply)

Haha
You're my favourite one.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:56, Reply)

also, he's funnier than me.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:56, Reply)

I think we can all agree on that.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:56, Reply)

truly so

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:58, Reply)

"Funny" is subjective.
Many people think the Lee Evans is funny. That doesn't make them right.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:57, Reply)

Peadofiles in mothercare go "I'm sweating like Lee Evens on a stage"

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:27, Reply)

Has he been stepped then?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:52, Reply)

No, it's just it's potato harvesting season or something.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:55, Reply)

NO YOUR ANGRY

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:47, Reply)

I'm not you know.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:50, Reply)

No, it seems unlikely.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:53, Reply)

probably back when i was 21 and decided to move back into my parents house
I was working 2 jobs, it was hard, but I lived on my own and if I had continued I probably would have a more fulfilled life and maintained a responsible adulthood
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:43, Reply)

fulfilled but fucked
consider that man, consider that
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:17, Reply)

Rocking in here tonight, innit?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:47, Reply)

Any minute now it's going to pick up and get really exciting.
Just wait....
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:48, Reply)

Any minute...

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:50, Reply)

*doesn't hold breath*

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 21:50, Reply)

Here it comes....

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:02, Reply)

Ta dah!

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:03, Reply)

IT'S B3TH!!!!!!!!!!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:05, Reply)

It so is!

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:06, Reply)

I told you it would be worth hanging around, Davvo.
....Davvo?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:06, Reply)

Hello?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:50, Reply)

Is it me you're looking for?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:54, Reply)

I suppose I'd be interested to see where I'd be now
if I hadn't run away to live with a creepy old man off the internet.
Or if I'd studied something else at university.

alt: Yeah, I've got one of them.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:03, Reply)

Living alone?
Or perhaps with some other creepy man?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:09, Reply)

Almost certainly one or the other.
Thing is, if I'd known back then what I know now, I would have been more confident around actual, real life men. I might even have done proper dating and that.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:13, Reply)

Hindsight is a wonderful thing

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:15, Reply)

Innit.
You're never going to be younger or more attractive than you are now.
Which, when you think about it, is fucking depressing.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:17, Reply)

D:

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:19, Reply)

Here to help.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:19, Reply)

Not true
I'm hotter now than I was when I was younger
( Kroney, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:22, Reply)

Face it Krones, you've peaked.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:24, Reply)

Maybe I have now
but youth isn't everything. I am much better looking at 32 than I was at 22. There is photographic evidence, but I'll be fucked if I'm producing it.
( Kroney, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:26, Reply)

I feel the same
We're all swans here, Kroney...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:29, Reply)

Meh
No ellipsis needed. I'm not saying it out of vanity, it's a fact.
( Kroney, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:30, Reply)

I have a tendency to overuse ellipses.
I got better too, just not by much.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:35, Reply)

i'm hoping I'll grow into my face

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:31, Reply)

^this.
I seem to have a small head but a huge face.
and sloping shoulders.
And no lips.
And a squinty eye.
And a big red shiny nose.

*goes off for a cry*
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:33, Reply)

BUT YOU'VE GOT A GREAT PERSONALITY!!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:36, Reply)

Fat birds generally do.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:38, Reply)

I don't think you're allowed to say you're fat
you weren't anyway, then you lost weight.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:43, Reply)

I'm still overweight.
Wish I wasn't though.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:44, Reply)

She doesn't even really have that.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:38, Reply)

: (

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:39, Reply)

Do you know the really sad thing?
Al's RL friends can't understand why he's so mean online.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:41, Reply)

It's because he can never have the man he truly loves.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:43, Reply)

I've totally gone off him since he fell off the face of the planet.
I don't care anymore.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:45, Reply)

he's got a tetchy keyboard

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:43, Reply)

They all think I'm an obnoxious prick.
I read it on the internet so it must be true.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:45, Reply)

actually, I think I probably am too.
Which isn't hard.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:24, Reply)

I don't think you were supposed to see that, Cavers.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:20, Reply)

it makes me sad

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:25, Reply)

I might get more attractive!
Er...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:19, Reply)

Imagine a 4 year old saying that, bokes

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:30, Reply)

I bet you would, as well.
Nonce.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:31, Reply)

How's the other end of the spectrum grave digger x
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:37, Reply)

at least I'm legal

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:38, Reply)

Touché

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:45, Reply)

Yeah, evil ex
*yawn*
( Kroney, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:23, Reply)

I'm sensing it's a theme in here.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:24, Reply)

Well, mine lasted longer than a lot of marriages.
Bitterness aside, it would be interesting to see what would have happened if I'd slagged about in my twenties rather than being relatively faithful.
( Kroney, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:27, Reply)

Was that really an option though?
I heard you weren't all that when you were 22
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:30, Reply)

No, but I started improving by 24/25
I was unrecognisable by 27.
( Kroney, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:31, Reply)

Was that when you had the sex change?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:39, Reply)

Yeah
Christ, but I was an ugly woman
( Kroney, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:45, Reply)

It's a puzzler.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:30, Reply)

alright arsebishops?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:43, Reply)

If I hadn't kept my mouth shut when I noticed the application number on my college rejection notice didn't match up with the one that had been quoted in earlier correspondence,
I might have got into college, done some nice adequate A-levels, gone on to a nice adequate yeenie, got a nice adequate degree, settled down with a nice adequate lass in a nice adequate new-build and become a nice adequate loyal Tory voter living in nice adequate white-collar comfort.

Then again, given what the work situation's like for young folk these days I'd probably have wound up spending the rest of my life living with my mam and having to work for free.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:52, Reply)

It's true, the more you say a word, the less sence it makes

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:38, Reply)

Thinking about it, I'm sure that my life would be amazing
If only I'd done everything completely differently.
So yeah, thanks for bringing me down and ruining my whole night, Bobby.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 22:58, Reply)

I wish you'd all never been born.
The saga of the Rory poem rolls on.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:01, Reply)

The joke is on you because I've actually been trolling you the whole time!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:04, Reply)

legless, give Tangers back his login.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:08, Reply)

legless Miggyman
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:15, Reply)

When a load of drivel is posted by a self-important dullard who won't stop replying again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again just to get the last word in,
that's amore the only way to win is not to play.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:06, Reply)

That is hurting my icredibly drunk brain.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:07, Reply)

I'm back from the pub.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:21, Reply)

That's nice,

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:26, Reply)

It was lovely.
I caught up with a mate I've not seen for a few weeks.

How is b3th world?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:31, Reply)

Spinning abbout. Abs a bit funny at e dhes.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:44, Reply)

I hope it feels better than it reads.
What are you heading to the Mecca of the West Country?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 18 Jul 2012, 23:47, Reply)

I suppose the moment I finally decided I was bored of academia is an important one
I'd be interested to see how my life would have changed had I gone along.

Alt: They are good fun.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 19 Jul 2012, 0:05, Reply)