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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Carrying on from willenium's excellent idea of a projects board where B3TANs can collaborate......Which B3TANs would you choose for a collaborative project, based on their online persona?
I'd choose Enzyme as the spokesman for the first UK euthanasia clinic.
Alt: Doing anything exciting today? I'm being dragged to a trade show at the NEC that has the most tenuous of connections to anything I might be interested in but lunch will be free. Ah well.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:15, 160 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
I'd collaborate with Monty to beat your fucking head in for starting shit threads(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:27,
Reply)
I have no idea.It was rather bizarre seeing Enzyme being used as an expert recently on BBC, knowing that this is the man I've seen absolutely off his face.
Alt: Work, then go home, collect laptop, go to another house, more work, depending on what time I get out of there, go to another house, more work.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:28,
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North West TonightSomething to do with ethics, I wasn't paying a huge amount of attention.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:31,
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I'd collaborate with AA to roll bella down a hill in Gloucestershire (
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:33,
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IS THERE SOMETHING THAT YOU NEED TO TELL THE CLASS(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:38,
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I can only remember him whining on offtopic about him not being able to spray his custard over crackhouse(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:40,
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He's a nullo. That's all I'm saying.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:41,
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i had to look that up, Enzyme needs to be chased from the internet and beaten with sticks(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:44,
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still listening to Gang Starr.I'd collaborate with Monty on a club night based entirely on 85 to 2005 hip hop and 76 to 86 post punk.
Next level ill shit yo.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:28, Reply)
Would you wear matching turquoise shirts?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:31,
Reply)
I might collaborate with chompy to do some gang rape(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:32,
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I wouldn't collaborate with any of you.As you're all a bunch of complete losers.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:34,
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You could collaborate with dozer and stand on each others shoulders inside a rain coat to fool Cinema staff into letting you watch 12a rated movies(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:36,
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:38,
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You could collaborate with 6 other people of a similar stature to run a successful mining businessWhilst simultaneously hiding a prIncess from an evil witch.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:41,
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I'd collaborate with Jeff and Stunned to host a lolb4sh.Oh hang on.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:34,
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will you be Dj-Ing this year? What poptastic tunes from the hit parade will you play?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:38,
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Nah not playing this year.I barely got a chance to talk to anyone last time (which was excellent) so this year it's just 'drinking in the pub' - I might have a few bods back afterwards at which point I will unleash the TOM SAWYER CUT-UP of myth and legend.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:39,
Reply)
You should do us all a favourAnd DJ.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:45,
Reply)
I've bought a megaphone so everyone can hear my EXPERT OPINIONS more clearly.I'm so thoughtful.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:51,
Reply)
I wouldn't collaborate with anyone here sorryonline persona, offline persona it doesn't really matter.
No offence or anything
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:38,
Reply)
i wouldn't want to be emotionally vulnerable... not againI'd also have to brush up on the Insolvency Act again due to the inevitable disaster that would follow
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:48,
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No need! I'm a fucken expert on it.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:50,
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you should thank allah that you got to keep Chateau Boyce(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:54,
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In'sh'allah I can hang on a bit longer.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:57,
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:06,
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Meeting between my dear pal and his legal contact at 11am today.In related news I am getting access for 7hrs on the 29th when my mum's up. I'm going to be in top form for the lolb4sh.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:08,
Reply)
excellent news all round!is there a dress code at this place? i have some of those new shorts that look like a mini skirt and some new heels that i want to wear, but i don't want to turn up looking like a tart at a funeral or something equally Wrong...
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:12,
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Putting the fun into funeral(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:12,
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i've just reminded myself of nellie boswell yelling "she is a tart"that programme was shit
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:16,
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Our Aveline was from Sunderland, fact fans(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:17,
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Which one?There were two.
Actually I don't care.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:19,
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Ooo-weeee-ooohYeah thanks for that.
I'm going to be singing that shit for the rest of the day now.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:22,
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'dress like a Shoreditch prick' is the code, I fear.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:13,
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so a pair of "suit shorts" and heels will probably be perfect prick-attire thennice
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:14,
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Works for me!I should try it.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:18,
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if we get smashed enoughwe can swap outfits later on.
you're so much taller than i am, your legs will go on for MILES. oooh.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:19,
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Except for the pictures I request, right?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:28,
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i suppose i did promise you a cockgazit might as well be monty's, as he strains to keep it inside my shorts (after we've swapped outfits, i mean!)
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:41,
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ironic scarf, tight jeans and a fixie, then?hoxton chic, braa.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:26,
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Leggings, a vest, some flouro sneakers and lensless glasses.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:28,
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really?Jesus, London gets cuntier by the week
No offence, like.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:29,
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are they really shorts, or is it still tight jeans rolled half-way up the shin?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:35,
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shall i let the grey streak in my hair take over?(
rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:15,
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Ideally.If you could also pre-load on drink and drugs before you arrive, that would also help.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:16,
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It works for me! You should try it.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:17,
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It works for me! You should try it.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:21,
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It works for me! You should try it.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:17,
Reply)
Fat slapper.You'll fit right in.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:15,
Reply)
don't make me threaten you with MOAR violenceotherwise my fist will fit right up your japs eye
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:15,
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It works for me! You should try it.(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:18,
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Kroney can collaborate with any occupying forces.Nakers can be used as an example of why euthanasia is a good thing.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:42,
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I don't mind the easy and pain-free death for my face,but I do object to this American made-up word.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:13,
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Ape, for the lolsAlt:
Nope. I need to further berate the estate agent for telling us the viewings were Tuesday, then texting and changing to Wednesday 15 mins beforehand, only to find the people turned up at our house anyway. Stupid fucking bitch
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:02,
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estate agents being idiots?whatever next, sporters? Pontiff cathlolcism conundrum?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:31,
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well given my background in lettings and then being a property lawyerand rory's property interests, i'd have said rory, and we could have made MILLIONS.
but having seen that he is not ^ keen ^ to work with b3tans i will go into some kind of venture making kitten shaped cakes with lusty and selling them to b3tans. we'll be RICH and rory will be SORRY.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:05,
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every day is full of regretssome days there aren't enough tissues in the world for my tears
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:53,
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hilarious strikethrough involving spunk and your granny's fish brisket juice(
rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:54,
Reply)
uhhh why the fuck would I want to work with these losers?!they're on the other fucking side of the planet.
I nominated to be a student rep on campus next year. FREE FOOD WOO!
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:21, Reply)
Because I'm an evil scientist?(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:38,
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But do you have a lair situated inside a volcano?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:40,
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I'm a traineeI'm allowed to stroke a white cat occasionally. and one trapdoor into the shark tank per ten years service.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 10:00,
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Always with the fucking sharks!Give it a rest, old boy.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 10:02,
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I'll collaborate with anyone who can fund my plan to rid the world of fucktards.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:27,
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I'll be needing some top biologists. You're IN.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:35,
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If you can do PCR and DNA knock out/in I don't care.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:38,
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Yeah I can do PCR, gel electrophoresis, recombination of dna.I've only done the recombination in bacteria though. We used viral genes and stuck them into the bacterial genome. Was cool.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:41, Reply)
Similar with human cells.Just different viruses.
You did recombination into the genome, not as a plasmid then? good stuff.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:47,
Reply)
*gazzes bank account and sort code number*(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:30,
Reply)
Sounds interesting What is the plan, and how much funding is required?
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:30, Reply)
It involves eugenics and genetic manipulationSo, a fair bit, but not as much as you'd think. I've got most of the kit already. Ethical approval is the problem, so I'd need, say, Rory, DZR and Swipe to engineer a regieme change to a benign dictatorship to ensure our plans are passed. Probably fronted by a coalition of Monty and Two Hats.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:34,
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My PCR machines are a bit out of date though.Need a bit for some new ones.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:37,
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So you've identified the DNA responsible for fuckwittery?A Nobel prize surely awaits.
Or is it something similar to shooting anyone with neck tattoos or who has a hood up when it's neither cold nor raining, etc?
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:38, Reply)
that's not really fair about the hood thing though.What if their body temperature is naturally a little low and they feel the cold more than you? Then you're just shooting someone suffering from mild hypothermia, and that's a tad extreme surely.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:40, Reply)
If your body temperature was unusually lowwouldn't you feel the heat more acutely?
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:41,
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I mean, I don't knowNot a doctor...if that wasn't already clear
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:42,
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Maybe.I dunno. My body temperature is a little low and I feel cold all the time. Maybe I just have bad circulation.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:43, Reply)
I'd like someone in the know to clear this upWhen I've had a high body temperature in the past I've felt very cold. So logically the opposite should be true. I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS RIGHT!!!
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:44,
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I'm far too busy with my new business venturewww.thrhorses.com/
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:51,
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Your body temperature, as in core, is exactly the same as anyone elseor you'd be dead. You've got, as you say, poor circulation in your extremities. and that makes you feel cold. IT's pretty common in women because of tissue make-up differences. You can rectify it by a fuckload of exercise, though.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:46,
Reply)
If they're feeling hypothermic when it's 20+ degrees Cthen there's something very wrong with them!
I meant wannabe gangstas rather than those who are merely a "bit cold".
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:42, Reply)
No, I'll just knock out some intron repetitive sequences and knock in a reporter sequence That expresses something like GFP or Cherry when the nerve cells in the optical nerve are exposed to something like Britain must be stopped, X factor or Big Brother.
Then, once a week, everyone has to go and stand under a fluorescent light source. If you glow green or red, double-tap to the head and into an unmarked grave.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:43,
Reply)
We'll just put a tax on purchases at Iceland and KFC to cover it.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:48,
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We could get some really nice suits made MonceYou know, like REALLY nice.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:45,
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Like it! Military-style.I was thinking more 'salmon pink zoot suit with cape and shorts' for me. Like Rufus Thomas wears in 'Wattstax'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:51,
Reply)
Man, that'll suit youWe're going to be the sexies boys in the whole UN!
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:53,
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*removes shiny green suit with red lining from Amazon wishlist*No, I mean, I'm sure it will look great on you Tee Aitch.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:51,
Reply)
When I get it I'll let you try it onI can take some pictures of you on my iPhone. Also, I'm going to need an iPhone.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:53,
Reply)
I'm not sure how my skill set fits with this role.What are the day to day demands of the job?
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:42, Reply)
sartorial elegance, Dozer.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:44,
Reply)
LEISURE CENTRE MANAGEMENT mainly.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:45,
Reply)
Hey MontyIs there a dress code for lolbash? Only I have these shorts that look like miniskirts that I wanted to wear. I think I might pair them with some slutty heels. Oh man, I hope somebody else doesn't turn up in the same outfit. Is there going to be somewhere for me to lock up my fixie?
So Enzyme doesn't have a penis, eh? That explains a few things. If I didn't have a penis, I'd probably be tedious, too. I mean, I've barely got one as it is and I'm already pretty fucking boring.
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Kroney, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:41,
Reply)
well, be fair Kroney, you're a pretty fucking boring person anyway.The size of your penis won't change that fact.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:42, Reply)
there is no way he'd risk competing with my legs, it's all goodhis cankles are nothing like as rounded and chunky
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rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:43,
Reply)
It's only lethal if you're a weakling.I have survived nearly 21 years here, and I'm doing just fine.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:47, Reply)
Mine'll be a laaaarge cognac, BoycieNOBODY has made this joke before
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Kroney, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:50,
Reply)
I have read and re-read this but no. I do not get it.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:56,
Reply)
It may - MAY - be a reference to some sort of television programme(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:57,
Reply)
That could explain why I've no idea what he's on about.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 10:03,
Reply)
Anyone see Neil Oliver's superb programme on Vikings last night?It was brilliant but it did mean I missed a Peter Sutcliffe one on 5. My brother texted me updates from it though.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 10:05,
Reply)
So often I go through the tv guideand go "ooh, a documentary on sutcliffe/manson family/fred west/etc" then glance across "oh....it's on five"
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 10:08,
Reply)
No, there's just something about docu's on Fivethat aren't quite right.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 10:11,
Reply)
They tend to be low-rent US ones they've done a UK voiceover on.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 10:15,
Reply)
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