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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Ground to a halt,
just like your pitiful life. Did you have a dream as a kid? What did you want to be when you left Uni? Have you settled, or do you love what you do?

Alt: Maybe you sacrificed what you loved doing, for someone you loved, was it woth it?

altalt: if you're a student, or whatever, what's the plan man?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:35, 163 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
I haven't been on b3ta for ages cos I got a promotion, pay rise and fancy job title
So pass the fucking croisants. I love what I do and love the stress.

Alt. I was going to move to Japan when I met the wife, the pictures I took this weekend definitely suggest it was worth staying.

altalt. I work with students, I sit and listen to their ridiculous conversations. Todays gem was a couple of guys talking about reincarnation and how they love animals so much that animals must be reincarnated humans. Yeh! Right on man! Your both like soooooo intellectual. Dog fucking twats.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:39, Reply)
seriously? they sound well thick, PJ
how's the wife? love life? Oven glove?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:41, Reply)
Is PhillieJoeJimBob trying to tell us that he has been taking naughty pictures of his HOT WIFE?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:52, Reply)
from what i can see
he's been to japan and took some photos without his wife, that assured him moving to japan would have been a bad idea

let's all just assume tentacle rape
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:54, Reply)
It's usually a safe assumption to make.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:57, Reply)
I think the student you work with may need to lay off the drugs a little.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:45, Reply)
I want to design a Dyson Sphere to prove mmps wrong.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:41, Reply)
It doesn't prove mumpers wrong
unless you are also an advanced alien civilisation, does it?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:42, Reply)
Well maybe not, but I'd get to name it PsychoChomp 1
and we all know that'll be an awesome name for the most important structure humans will ever make.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:47, Reply)
The name wouldn't be allowed to include 'psycho'

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:48, Reply)
Chompy would also work as a good name.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:49, Reply)
I'm now reading about megastructures on wikipedia
there's my lunch hour gone.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:12, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1751291
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:44, Reply)
I pretty much do what I always wanted to do
although I'd probably prefer to be a workshy layabout prick living off some secret source of money.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:43, Reply)
Why not sell your bum to a millionaire,
a gay one.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:44, Reply)
I reckon my arse isn't worth that much, Winders.
Probably a little past it and hairy. I can only imagine gay millionaires are more into pert young bottoms.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:45, Reply)
it's no kroney's butt, this is true

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:48, Reply)
Few things are.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:50, Reply)
i heard it's looser than the grand canyon after an earthquake

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:53, Reply)
I bet it looks like a dead Sarlacc

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:55, Reply)
*click*

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:58, Reply)
Fuck you, Winders.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:45, Reply)
woah now,
hang on, what?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:50, Reply)
I wanted to be a lawyer, or barrister when I was younger, so glad I didn't. Saw the world, and had fun instead.
I am a student now, a lolmature student, and am loving it. I seriously wouldn't give career advice to anyone, they may end up doing the same.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:47, Reply)
sounds alright,
what you studying as a lolmature student?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:50, Reply)
Art, design and nedia, which is pretty much what I've been doing for years anyway.
Just be nice to have an official qualification.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:52, Reply)
As a child I always dreamed of sitting in front of a computer in an office talking shite to strangers via some international communication tool.
So it worked out pretty well for me.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:47, Reply)
i wanted to be a policeman
but after speaking to malc i'm glad i didn't
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:48, Reply)
why did you let your gf go to ikea?
that was just stupid
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:49, Reply)
she likes it there
and her mum needed a new wardrobe
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:51, Reply)
she got 3
3 wardrobes, 2 too many really
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:51, Reply)
I went there once.
I bought some stuff.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:52, Reply)
In fact I actually went on a date there once.
Her idea. It didn't work out.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:52, Reply)
one of my gay mates met a dude on grinder
and got taken "spatula shopping". this was not even a euphemism, as he assumed. the guy actually wanted to buy a spatula. and didn't want to spank him with it.

yours sounds even shitter.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:54, Reply)
She liked the meatballs *shrug*

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:55, Reply)
my mrs doesn't even have that as an excuse
she bought three stuffed toys this weekend, a cake tin shaped like a horse and other assorted knick knacks

she's 33, ffs
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:59, Reply)
i am actually really quite jealous of the tin shaped like a horse
but i don't really like cake. could i keep something else in it? like nail varnish maybe?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:03, Reply)
no

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:04, Reply)
oh do you mean a baking tin rather than a storage tin?
that sucks. you're going to be eating horse cake like a 6 year old. giddy up.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:05, Reply)
nah, we're baking her niece a chocolate cake tonight
and there's a baby horse as well
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:06, Reply)
"tonight's guest on "i don't give a fuck about baby horses is me"
i fucking love "the thick of it"
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:07, Reply)
so does psychochomp

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:08, Reply)
even a blind squirrel will find the occasional nut
srsly though, are you going to make 2 cakes? or like a tiered horse cake, with the little one suspended on top of the big one?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:13, Reply)
tiered, i think

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:20, Reply)
I think your second double-quote needs to be after 'horses' rather than 'me'

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:11, Reply)
I suspect foal play

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:11, Reply)
(h)Oof!

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:15, Reply)
we'll have no mare of these

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:19, Reply)
ikea sucks
send her to peter jones
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:52, Reply)
SHE LIKES IKEA

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:52, Reply)
oh
oh well. at least you can get the ring from argos, eh?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:53, Reply)
not argos, ikea
can you read english, motherfucker?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:54, Reply)
you idiot boy
i was saying that she has cheap taste and low expectations. therefore when you propose, you can go to argos rather than hatton garden.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:02, Reply)
what's that got to do with Ikea?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:04, Reply)
or maybe just buy some crackers at christmas?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:05, Reply)
you've lost me, put yourself on ignore please

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:06, Reply)
i googled the cake tin
millions of sad cunts have posted pictures of the cakes they made with it. those people should put themselves in the oven.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:07, Reply)

fanny foodbeam lol
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:09, Reply)
i ain't clicking on that!

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:12, Reply)
I'm doing what I'm good at.
in that I'm fixing things for a living. However, I'd much rather not have to be trying to think of ways of saying "it's not working because you're a stupid cunt" without using the words "you're a stupid cunt".
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:49, Reply)
when i was about 4, my dad told me to be a stock broker
i had no idea what it meant, but i would cheerfully trot up to his friends and tell them i was going to be a stock broker. not surprisingly, they all found it hilarious. the twat. i like my job a lot. i can't say i love it though.

alt: if i answer this, monty will kill me. i love monty.

altalt: just done a masters. sniffing around for something else to study. i quite fancy psychology, but have a feeling i should do something useful, like maths a-level. hmm.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:52, Reply)
Become a barrister instead,
and earn stupid amounts of money for talking to other barristers. On behalf of plebs. Oh wait...
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:54, Reply)
I don't care, it's all lies LIES!
THE WORLD IS ALL DARKNESS AND WE ARE NOTHING BUT CORPSES IN WAITING.

yeah, not bad actually. could be worse.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 11:58, Reply)
I'm regretting this thread MMPS,
everyone seems to be pretty happy with their lot, i was hoping for some wailing and gnashing of teeth.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:04, Reply)
i could have been a doctor, WP
a frigging Dr
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:05, Reply)
BOLLOCKS!!

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:07, Reply)
genuinely could have been a doctor, iw as well into science and shit
my mum and nanna wanted me to be one, but i couldn't be doing with all that
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:08, Reply)
drugs?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:10, Reply)
nah, i mean just imagine how many old ladies vagains and piles you'd have to look at

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:14, Reply)
one of the main reasons I'm doing research and not med,
is so that I don't have to look at saggy old private parts.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:26, Reply)
saggy gunt

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:38, Reply)
one of my friends had a baby a few months ago, and was saying about how the other lady who was on the labour ward at the time was SO fat, that her caesarian stitches were pulled apart by the weight of her belly.
Like, this wasn't pregnancy fat, this was 150kgs fat. The kind where the person is rounder than they are tall.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:43, Reply)
It's funny what effect good and bad teachers can have
My biology teacher was fairly shit so I didn't do it at O-Level, my physics teachers were good until A-level so I ended up not doing a physics degree... How things might have been different! *wavy lines*
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:14, Reply)
This,
The subjects i did at A-level were almost entirely based on the teachers i would have going forward.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:28, Reply)
I am a student.
Plan is to get my bachelors at the end of next year, do my honours year at the Peter Mac Institute the year after that, do my Masters, then get a PhD in Molecular genetics of Cancer. Then just keep on researching. Just because I love it.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:13, Reply)

Peter Fleetwood
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:14, Reply)
I'd rather jack

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:15, Reply)
Arse

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:16, Reply)
Eat some meat, it'll allow you to think faster and type more effectively.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:18, Reply)
chevroooOOOOON

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:21, Reply)
Girls!

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:19, Reply)
I don't know who that is.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:19, Reply)
I'd rather jack.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:16, Reply)
you leave all those bachelors alone!
lol
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:19, Reply)
I wish I'd called in sick today.
Printers. I fucking hate printers.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:20, Reply)
My dad loves printers, the weirdo.
He was one of the top printer specialists for IBM in australia. I remember him getting sent off all over the place to fix them when I was little.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:22, Reply)
Have you tried turning it off and on again?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:22, Reply)
Printers are the appliances of Satan.
The descendants of old photocopiers sent to torment us unto eternity.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:26, Reply)
They're mechanical. They should be easy.
I've got a proper ball-ache of a driver issue though. Fucking thing.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:31, Reply)
My office printer won't print anything that is in Cambria typeface,
it took me fucking ages to figure out why it wouldn't print some menus, but would others.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:27, Reply)
have you checked there is paper in it?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:24, Reply)
I'm a drifter
I drifted into catalogue modelling, then drifted into compliance when I reached the point of being slightly too old but too young to be s silver fox.

May well go back and do an MA in contemporary literature. I'd focus on Bret Easton Ellis, Don De Lillo and Thomas Pynchon. I love American fiction.

Either that it hold on a few years until I can go back to the catalogue modelling as a silver fox.

But after all that, I'm no Kroney.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:32, Reply)
Huh?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:33, Reply)
you're the sexiest man on Off Topic, right?
Arse and legs etc etc.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:35, Reply)
I make no such claim.
I just have good legs, that's all. I'd be a good Tudor.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:36, Reply)
By the way, you ARE a cabbage.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:37, Reply)
I AM NOT A BRASSICA OF ANY DESCRIPTION
More a "leg"ume.

lol
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:38, Reply)
omfg lti.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:42, Reply)
That may be the Jeffiest post I ever write.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:45, Reply)
please don't try to beat it.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:54, Reply)
That would be pretty 'bad', i mean these things aren't 'black or white'
but sometimes you have to look at 'the man in the mirror' and understand that it's as easy as 'ABC'
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:05, Reply)
Ben
der
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:08, Reply)
That's bad, even for you.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:11, Reply)
When you're rude to me you 'make me wanna scream'

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:12, Reply)
Why won't you just die? :(

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:13, Reply)
This sub thread is a real Thriller!

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:18, Reply)
Go hang over a balcony

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:20, Reply)
That's definitely NOT the way you make me feel

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:14, Reply)
pic or gtfo

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:38, Reply)
Sexy men on the net?
This OT is turning a bit shirty, I think it's time for a new thread. However, it's lunch time, so I don't think that'll happen. Anyway, what's for lunch?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:37, Reply)
He's just a bit sniffy because
everybody sees his "women stop me on the street and tell me how good-looking I am" schtick and immediately thinks "insecure closet homosexual".
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:41, Reply)
I cry myself to sleep at night
:'(
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:43, Reply)
QOTW is great for stuff like this.
did you bang shitloads of models?
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:38, Reply)
In the Honda, obviously.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:45, Reply)
I dreamt of spending two hours learning about competition law, this morning my dream was realised

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:49, Reply)
I love you nakkers.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:51, Reply)
I'm quite loveable

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:00, Reply)
would you start a new thread?
I'm bored of this one.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:09, Reply)
Well, thanksfor asking guys,
I dropped out of uni where i was doing pretty well to go work for a friend, and fell in love with the hospitality trade, cocktail bars, restaurants, pubs, the whole lot, and i couldn't think of anything i'd rather do.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:50, Reply)
you should grow some mutton chops.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:52, Reply)
I know I would if I could.
I have the facial hair growth of a 10 year old :(
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:54, Reply)
Is Jimmy Saville aware of this?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:55, Reply)
I shouldn't think so.
He's dead.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:56, Reply)
I'm going to,
the boys at the pub are organising a movember thing, and as i already have a moustache, i'm going to grow great big mutton chops instead.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:55, Reply)
maybe you could find a job that doesn't destroy people's lives

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:22, Reply)
I wanted to be a pilot but this seemed to disappear as I grew up
I have no idea what I want to be, even now

Rich would do.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:55, Reply)
Why not sell your bum to a millionaire,
a gay one.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 12:56, Reply)
That's your answer to everything.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:02, Reply)
I'm hoping to become a millionaire.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:09, Reply)
I need it to sit on

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:02, Reply)
*Fonzy thumbs up*

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:02, Reply)
I didn't go to Uni
I wanted to be a motherfucking hustler.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:10, Reply)
I'm an international raconteur and bon vivant.
fuck these moaners hats, lets get down the casino.
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:12, Reply)
*waves wad*

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:12, Reply)
I like the 2p push slot machine.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:16, Reply)
Or Monty, as he is more commonly known

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:18, Reply)
TO THE ARCADES!

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:21, Reply)
can we play time crisis?

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:24, Reply)
HOUSE OF THE DEAD HOUSE OF THE DEAD HOUSE OF THE DEAD HOUSE OF THE DEAD

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:25, Reply)
you can play both but no fighting over who gets to play operation wolf first.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:26, Reply)
If they've got Operation Thunderbolt, we can both play

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:27, Reply)
we're not going to the fancy arcades,

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:28, Reply)
I'M NOT COMING THEN

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:28, Reply)
gunblade or gtfo

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:29, Reply)
SPACE HARRIER
www.arcade-museum.com/images/108/1088284893.jpg
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:30, Reply)
my girlfriend fell off one of those motorbike ones in brighton last year
true story
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:32, Reply)
Haha, clumsy cow
frankly
(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:33, Reply)
I can still be an astronaut, fuck you all

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:21, Reply)
of course you can dear.

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:22, Reply)
you're certainly a space cadet

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:25, Reply)
New thread innit

(, Mon 8 Oct 2012, 13:26, Reply)

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