Gays.
Does this house believe that because some mod prick can ride a bike really fast that they should be knighted?

Nominate someone who deserves it more. We do this every year and every year I say Jamie Oliver, for services to the nation (despite his being a colossal wanker).
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:32, 137 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

no.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:33, Reply)

I'd argue he deserves it more than those that simply read scripts.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:35, Reply)

I'd say 'being able to read aloud' and 'riding a bike fast' are about equal.
Very impressive indeed. If you are about four.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:36, Reply)

which ones 'only read scripts'?
And I nominate John Berger, but I suspect he'd turn it down.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:37, Reply)

I hate 'simply read'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:30, Reply)

I think the bigger scandal
is the head of the FSA getting a knighthood despite being the one who should have seen the bank crash coming.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:40, Reply)

right view, wrong reason
He shouldn't have got the Barclays job either.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:41, Reply)

Indeed
Smells of a reward for keeping the skeletons firmly in the cupboard.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:44, Reply)

One of the things wrong with the honours system is that we give an MBE to some old boy who worked at Bletchley Park during the war
and a knighthood to some mod prick who can ride a bike really fast.

I nominate that we don't bother dishing out knighthoods.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:40, Reply)

I say restore all the hereditary peerages and then bin the system off.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:41, Reply)

I don't really.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:41, Reply)

Which mod prick got knighted?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:44, Reply)

b3th has been made into a Dame.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:45, Reply)

Sorry, I mean b3th looks like a pantomime dame.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:45, Reply)

Pantomime horse more like!!
lol. Am I right?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:49, Reply)

What time did you turn in on NYD?
I ended up at a house party in Hertfordshire in the end.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:51, Reply)

About midday.
I was in fucking bits.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:55, Reply)

I was very, very close indeed to not going anywhere but bed that evening based on the night before's idiocy.
I fucking hate New Year's Eve anyway. All the amateurs come out.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:57, Reply)

See above

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:59, Reply)

YM

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:46, Reply)

My STRAIGHT Mum.
Get it right.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:50, Reply)

Mark Lamarr
Only because he annoys you.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:58, Reply)

I rather like him actually.
He knows a lot about music and seems to have pretty decent taste too.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:01, Reply)

This.
I'm a big fan of his Alternative Sixties radio show.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:21, Reply)

+ and his homemade organic avodcado dip

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:24, Reply)

Ethically sourced guacamole is about as important as it gets.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:26, Reply)

I honestly couldn't give a fuck about knighthoods, peerages, etc.
I nominate Susanna Reid, for services to the sportscow AM defcon bongle industry
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 8:59, Reply)

No.
and I would agree with your Jamie Oliver mention. He is pretty awesome.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:05, Reply)

Apart from his ridiculous voice I have no issues with Jamie Oliver

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:06, Reply)

aha we watch him every night he's on here in my house.
we love cheap 15 minute meals!
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:07, Reply)

I agree with a lot of what he says about food
but his voice is annoying and watching his stuff makes my neck ache cos his cameraman seems to think it's "arty" to wave the camera around like a retard with an ice cream.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:16, Reply)

this^
I was going to make his "gravy" during my time off, but forgot

GSB
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:21, Reply)

You do realise that just because the camera angle changes doesn't mean you have to move your head?
I mean, I'm not suggesting you're a massive retard who hasn't even worked out how to watch TV. But, it sounds like you are.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:23, Reply)

It's not a "camera angle change"
it's a cameraman with Parkinsons and St Vitus' dance at the same time. If I want my TV to look like I'm playing COD I'll buy an Xbox.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)

that made me laugh way more than it should have...

(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:23, Reply)

I couldn't give two flying fucks.
The people who care about recieving one are a bit weird. I was almost impressed with Livingston refusing his, he said politicians shouldn't recieve them, which I agree with.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:08, Reply)

He certainly fucking shouldn't, thats for sure
Snidy little cunt that he is
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:09, Reply)

He did most the grunt work for setting up the Olympics.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:10, Reply)

Still a cunt

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:17, Reply)

An utter, utter cunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:19, Reply)

I think the guy that invented p2p file sharing should get a knighthood
for services to allowing me to download the walking dead comics (they're not "graphic novels" they're fucking comics) safe in the knowledge that it wasn't theft.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:22, Reply)

I thought of you this morning
as I listened to R4 where they were saying how the music, games and film industries were all struggling from the lack of hard copy sales, despite the growth in paid-for downloads. Luckily this is in no way related to the widespread stealing of their products online because that doesn't count, which must be a relief.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:33, Reply)

They weren't saying that at all Monty, they were praising the fact that digital downloads had not accoutned for over £1 billion.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:36, Reply)

This doesn't make sense even if you weren't talking shit.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:37, Reply)

sorry, that should have said "now" accounted for over £1 billion.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-20885506
(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:38, Reply)

Anyway
I don't see you bemoaning the decline in people purchasing steam engines.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)

You don't see it, because it hurts me too much even to mention it.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

Those stats are pointless unless you're actually putting unit sales in there as well.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Don't blame me, it's not my fault the BBC constantly abuse statistics in their pathetic attempts at journalism.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)

You mean the plummeting unit sales?
Those ones?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)

A 17.6% decrease in physical sales income against a 11.4% rise of digital sales income
could be exactly the same amount of unit sales as you well know.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)

Or could be an increase or decrease in unit sales. The point is you don't know unless they add unit sales.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)

Vinyl sales appear to be up
www.digitalmusicnews.com/permalink/2012/121004vinyl
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:21, Reply)

There is a fellow at Brick Lane market now
with boxes of 180g reissues. I could have given him £200 in about 30 seconds. Were that not the sum total of my disposable income for the next four years.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:25, Reply)

I blame Al
If he wasn't illegally downloading albums all the time, they could reduce the price of the physical copies.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:31, Reply)

Starting to regret my CAMRA now.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:38, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1819063
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:46, Reply)

Quite.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:53, Reply)

But what about Monty's "mate" Chompy?
You can't discount the evidence of someone that may not even exist!
(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)

Yes of course he would know this, his financial acumen is well known.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)

EXACTLY.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:14, Reply)

Could be.
But a million quid says it's not.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:15, Reply)

You are of course also ignoring the fact that there are now many, many ways to listen to music without actually paying for it in a totally legal fashion
e.g. spotify, youtube etc. This coupled with the fact that the quality of recorded music has declined (this from your own mouth) means that there is less stuff worth buying, and that which is worth buying can be listened to by the casual fan without them shelling out a penny but without infringing any copyright.

So it is massively simplistic to say that file sharing is the only reason why the music industry is making a slightly smaller profit (note that it's still a profit, not a loss) than it used to.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:30, Reply)

You are of course also ignoring the fact that your post is tl so I'm afraid I dr

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:31, Reply)

You're also ignoring the fact that your mum.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:34, Reply)

Glad to see all is as usual in this place.

( thealternativefact, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:35, Reply)

YOU?

HERE?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:39, Reply)

I worked for an hour. It was quite enough.

( thealternativefact, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:39, Reply)

Home time!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:41, Reply)

Woo Hoo!
I'm going again, but I would like to see your ragged and yet lovely face again sometime soon.
( thealternativefact, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:42, Reply)

Talk to my carer and let's get a meal sorted.
We've got a new oven and a food processor to play with. We are SO 2007.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:45, Reply)

I will do this!

( thealternativefact, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:45, Reply)

AWWWRAAAAAGHT

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:47, Reply)

I hope you enjoy your dinner.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:54, Reply)

We'll let you know.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:01, Reply)

Fucking hell Monty
this is a real low. It's only 9.30 and your thread has died.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:33, Reply)

Someone illegally downloaded all the witty replies so I cannot afford to keep the thread going.
Sorry everyone.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)

wheely?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)

Yes.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:37, Reply)

There could be a few honours given out around here.
Lord Chompy, for services to news reporting.
The Duke of Stunned for services to the brewing sector.
M Boyce CBE for services to the east London pharmaceutical industry.
Plumdozer OBE for services to the leisure industry (cleaning and filtration).

Etc.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:37, Reply)

A drug dealer asked me if I had any 'New Year's revolutions' the other day.
Oh dear.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)

Nosepowderplotslolz

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)

An uneducated drug dealer? Well I never.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)

I was as shocked as you are.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

45 every minute?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

You should totally have cut his head off and told the police. they wouldn't have prosecuted.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:57, Reply)

I did.
It didn't even make the local paper.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)

They give out so many
that they're pointless anyway. I'm sure that being Sir Wiggo will make him ride ever faster and make lots of money.

I should get a knighthood for the ten of thousands of pounds I have raised for charity during wacky wacky movember.
( Peej, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:53, Reply)

Aaaaah. Bradley Wiggins!
I had no idea.

As you were.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)

Still on for lunch on Friday?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Yes, mate.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:02, Reply)

Splendid.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)

I wonder if Nakers died over Xmas.
Poor old Nakers.

*pours out some 'malt liquor'*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)

Oh noes!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:17, Reply)

He was alive and in the Alps on Sunday.
He may have died in a freak skiing accident since then though.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:20, Reply)

Fingers crossed.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:22, Reply)

*pours out some gluhwein*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:22, Reply)

RIP MY UNCLOTHED SIMMIAN BRUTHA FROM ANUTHA MUTHA!

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:35, Reply)

Someone start a new thread.
I am a bit "busy" "working".
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:37, Reply)

You didn't say please.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:44, Reply)

Nope.
Glad as I am that cycling gets a higher profile and all that.

I nominate Frankie Boyle , for the lulz.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:43, Reply)

Happy New Year, Wilfred.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:47, Reply)

And the same to you Mr. Boyce
although I am starting it with a stinking cold and the remains of a hangover, it's looking to be a good one.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:58, Reply)

Well on the one hand, Wiggo did make himself the greatest Briton of all time in his chosen field in 2012.
On the other hand, is his chosen field worth bothering about? I was chuffed to see that Quentin Blake got a knighthood. No idea if he deserves it, unless it was for services to being brilliant at drawing.

Jamie Oliver is a good shout for using his celebrity to raise awareness of gluttony. And for having a mobile pub called The Cock In Cider. I nominate John Terry, as long as whoever's doing the sword-dobbing has Parkinson's. Also Alastair Cook, although that's a given. Eventually.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:47, Reply)

I like Quentin Blake's illustrations
but I never used to, as a boy I thought he was shit because his colouring-in is rather sloppy.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:51, Reply)

i love him
i was in a gallery in poole that had a couple of originals, i was tempted to hock a kidney to buy one
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:56, Reply)

hello children
happy 2013 and all that shit.

glad to see the party is still carrying on, on here...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:51, Reply)

:o(
Good hol?

Managed to wash that quare right out of your hair?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:52, Reply)

amazing holiday thank you
beautiful hotel, tasty scran, lots of sunshine, speed boat action... i am beyond upset to be back!

the hair is still in natty dreads, man :(

did E enjoy her christmas??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:55, Reply)

I'll let you know when I see her :o(

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)

speed boat action?
Did someone push their head betweeen your bosoms and vigourously shake it from side to side while blowing a raspberry?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:16, Reply)

I loved Vipros response to your facebook status about you being shit at putting on fake eyelashes.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:55, Reply)

i am not shit
the false eyelashes are shit. trust me, you should try it sometime.

but yes, i had to LOL.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:59, Reply)

Oh man I finished the last episode of Breaking Bad yesterday.
Gosh thats a good bit of telly right there.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:53, Reply)

I have downloaded this to watch, having not seen it yet
I have heard good stuff about it
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:55, Reply)

My brother got the first season from two different people as gifts.
He says after the first couple of episodes he couldn't be bothered with it any more and gave both sets away in the pub.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:56, Reply)

I watched 3 or 4 and gave up
Easily as dull as Arrested Development.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:25, Reply)

Gosh yes. I like the unexpected plot twists and the zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:55, Reply)

There's a great meth making and distribution montage.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:57, Reply)

The cocaine industry montage in Superfly is one of my all time favourite pieces of 'film' ever.
I want to see The Hobbit.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)

I enjoyed the hobbit, it is what it is.
Shame it's only 1/3rd of the story.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:04, Reply)

I think he's meeting Stunned on Friday lunchtime.
You could maybe see him there?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:06, Reply)

oh HO!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:07, Reply)

I GET THIS!!!!

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:16, Reply)

I haven't started Season 5 yet. I may wait until the whole thing has finished as I hate the mide season break they have in the states.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:56, Reply)

It's defo worth it, even though you have to wait for a few months for the conclusion.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 10:59, Reply)

Hey! Let's all post funny stuff in my NEW THREAD!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:05, Reply)

Hello everyone
Work is crazy and, to cap it all off, I agreed with my prospective flatmate that we should look for flats in Hammersmith. As is my way, I immediately told her to get on with it all whilst I sit back and wait for results. The first batch of potential flats have come in and they're all in North London. Not a little bit north either, but in Muswell Hill and East Finchley and places. I haven't replied yet as my rage currently has no bounds.

How should I punish this ridiculous ingrate whom I'm graciously allowing the responsibility of doing all the boring legwork?
( Kroney, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:05, Reply)

Show her your penis.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:06, Reply)

We dated briefly.
I have previously done so. She was unimpressed and we're now just friends.

These events are utterly unrelated.
( Kroney, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:11, Reply)

Show everyone the pictures of her breasts you have on your phone.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:08, Reply)

I have different ones now.

( Kroney, Wed 2 Jan 2013, 11:10, Reply)