Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I'm boycotting the tradition of asking a questiontalk about whatever you want, go on, try it. you don't need me to hold your hands
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:18,
237 replies,
latest was 13 years ago)
I'm eatinga yoghurt, I wanted a t-spoon but there were only desert spoons and now I'll eat it too quickly(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:21,
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Is a t-spoon a cross-dressing knife?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:22,
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yeah why notI've finished my yogurt now, I should have bought 2 :(
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:24,
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You could have pretented to be a giantOpportunity missed
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:27,
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Oh those wacky Nazis - always getting up to amusing japes!imgur.com/a/QQr4k
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:21,
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excellnt stuff, i like the armored donkey(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:23,
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Wow it’s almost like them Germans actually have a sense of humour(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:26,
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Very goodalthough by the look of it most of them are ordinary soldiers and may not have been Nazis.
edit: my phone ac's Nazis to Axis - how does it know?
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:27, Reply)
The belm on the second is rather impressive(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:31,
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Spoiled by the nudey one not being a Nazi.(
Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:55,
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Thats a wicked find(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:27,
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Why are some customers monumentally stupid?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:24,
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Only some?I've yet to speak to one of ours who isn't.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:26,
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We have determined that this weeks most stupid customers are all Welsh(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:26,
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I like how the Irish ones will always tell you they are Irish"HELLO MY NAME IS MARY AND I'M CALLING FROM IRELAND"
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:27,
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this^ME: "Can you send me the logs files please?"
Idiot: "I'll try"
FFS, he works as an IT manager.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:32,
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At least you've got your secret bash to look forward to!(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:26,
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Hello, I'm sportscow and today I'd like to talk to you about Jelly Babies(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:26,
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My daughter won two boxes from B&QShe doesn't like them - I do
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:27,
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Equal opportunities head remover me(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:30,
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This image really presents the Cornish in a good light.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:30,
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Even the fucking bird looks gay(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:31,
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the guuy on the right seems to have made his trousers out of a blue bin bag and some twine(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:32,
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Stay about from his bin bag trousers(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:34,
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They look very sad to be pastywogs(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:33,
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www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1885213
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:32,
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It's a spoon Jim, but not as we know it(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:34,
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is he the patron saint of footballs and shovels?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:33,
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no wonder battered nis quiet, he has locked himself away in prayer(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:34,
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Is the guy on the right wearing turquoise strides?I thought Dozer was from York.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:02, Reply)
I don't want to be at work todayI want to be at home playing video games.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:29,
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You want to be outside enjoying the first sunshine of the year!(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:30,
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Went out for a stroll earlierThat was quite nice.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:33,
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:(My in laws are from round there, up by Bishops Waltham
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:39,
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Oh yeahI used to know a drug dealer from Bishops Waltham. Hope this helps.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:40,
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i found out you can download an iso to play half life on the dreamcastso i'm gonna do that
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The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:35,
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i mean, i've played it before, but not on the dreamcast, the best of all consoles(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:44,
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Have you got Soul Caliber?That was ace on the Dreamcast. Also, Crazy Taxi.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:45,
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i have both of thoseand power stone is cool too
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The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:46,
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this is incredible news (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:39,
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yeah, like, it was made but never releasedwww.theisozone.com/downloads/dreamcast/dreamcast-isos/half-life-gold-dcres-usa/
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The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:44,
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why not go to /talk for this?it's much better there
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The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:35,
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Nail and head(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:35,
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I wonder how /talk would feel about a few piccys celebrating the BEST DAY OF THE YEAR(
Peej, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:36,
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Yeah, they always moan that nobody EVAH posts Pics. there(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:38,
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You'll be bombarded with such gems as "Dairy Wog" and "Cornish Prick", I'm certain(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:38,
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The Doveston tells me everyone is really niceAnd lovely on /talk
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:40,
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The Doveston says a lot of thingsMostly erudite tales of cunning and swashbuckling
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:45, Reply)
I like him alreadyIpswich tonight innit?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:47,
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Yeah, which means a hell of a ribbing from all my Canaries-supporting mates if we loseNot that such a result should be on the cards the way Raddy's playing
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:51, Reply)
GO RADDY!he's me favourite, i like the way he kicks the ball and runs a lot
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:59,
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Steak and blowjob day is later in the month innit?Am wondering if my meat-relinquishing decision entitles me to demand double BJs
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:42, Reply)
I'm sure they will all want two blow jobs from you(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:43,
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Two Cocks Foxtrot they call you(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:45,
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Yeah, I saw Beverly Hills Cop II the other night as wellOr rather, I saw the first ten minutes
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:58, Reply)
ermmm.....(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:00,
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Or it will be like in my house where I get told to fuck off twice(
Peej, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:45,
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Are you allowed in your house?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:45,
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I missed the memoThis is good news?
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:53,
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You're married with two kidsSurely this means the status quo has been restored
(excellent news by the way, chuffed for you)
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:53, Reply)
by this you of course mean no sex with youShe is still getting plenty
*continuing my wife fucking theme for today*
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:57, Reply)
that's the kind of attitude that get her gob "full" in no time(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:54,
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you should find out(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:42,
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it's lovely, we're all lovely(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:46,
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www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1885542
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:48,
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Because /talk seems to have taken the opposite approach and starts more threads with a question now.I think we're swapping over.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:38,
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I've just been out, it's lovely out there Although the woman on reception at the doctors was the rudest woman ever.
The treatment I got at the gym and chip shop was excellent, but every time I have to deal with the doctors, there is some acerbic old crone I have to speak to and everything takes ages.
I'm going to sign up to a new doctor.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:38,
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She works on the reception at every doctor's surgery in Britain.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:41,
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why are they so fucking horrid? (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:50,
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To stop workshy fakers from bothering the docs(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:54,
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It's Doorman Syndrome, isn't itThey're surrounded by people more educated than they are, who earn better money, do a more important job, etc. Yet they have this sense that the whole place will fall apart without them. Combine these things and you end up with an embittered old cow with nothing better to do than belittle people that (in a lot cases) have gone to the doctors because they're worried about something.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:56,
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And this pear should be ashamed of itselfIn the bin it goes
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:57,
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I dunno...get a good one, and you'll wonder where it's been all your lifebut these are cheap and shit. I need to have a word with my fruit buyer.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:01,
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FRUIT WOES\o/
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:02,
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Man, I'm wasting this posting it mid-boardThis deserves its own thread
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:07,
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YEP(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:20,
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You should read it, he makes some valid points.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:58,
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I can't read this nowThe earliest appointment I can give you to read it is December 5th.
2017.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:58, Reply)
But I need it to be read today reallyIs there any chance of fitting me in a bit sooner?
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:00,
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You'll have to try ringing in the morning for an emergency readingyou can only ring between 8:29 and 8:31.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:04, Reply)
Christ, ain't that the truthWhy can't we just turn up and take a ticket? BROKEN BRITAIN.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:08,
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If you are well enough to turn up and take a ticket, you clearly don't need to see the doctor.NEXT!
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:09,
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it took a week to get a letter, that was clearly a template with the name changed. I don't really know how it works, but if appointments are around 20 mins, and there are 9 doctors, how many patients must they have to be that busy every day?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:21,
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how do I oven cook sausages?(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:45,
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this isn't what I asked I want my money back(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:47,
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put sausages on grill pan, turn on oven, waittake out when cooked
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:47,
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My old flatmate once asked me how to make cheese on toast(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:57,
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It's really hard to get the cheese to stick to the bread when you put it in the toaster(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:58, Reply)
DurTurn the toaster on its side first
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:59,
Reply)
Put the toaster on its sideCheese won't fall then, ffs it's not that hard to beat gravity.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:00, Reply)
my friend went on a date with a guy who didn't know what a cheeseboard wasHow is that possible?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:59,
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Knight to King horsey three(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:02,
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I can beat thatMy brother bought a chameleon, but didn't know they could change colour. The single most well-known fact about the chameleon and he'd never heard it. Needless to say, it blew his tiny mind.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:04,
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The Smiths post zombie apocolyptic follow up single(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:17,
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how can we type with you holding our hands?Stop stifling us man
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:50,
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Headobbers innit(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:51,
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b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1885581
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:54,
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b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1885578
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:54,
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You clicked both, didn't you?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:55,
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I ended up copying and pasting three somehow(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:56,
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Right click and open in new tab you fool(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:58,
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firewall blocked i have to c&p from questions onwards onto 5.9.83.79(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:00,
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b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1881567
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:02,
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b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1885578
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:03,
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I don't even need to click that to know what it says :((
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:03,
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It might be different this time.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:04,
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Ha ha(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:56,
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Re-alignment (FFS) within my department means my boss will no longer be the comics-loving geeky metal fan I've had for the last year and a halfOn the upside my new boss is a bender
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:52, Reply)
You know what no one talks about anymore, Monts?The fucking Bermuda Triangle. It seems that at some point, things just stopped disappearing. I mean, there are a bunch of contibuting factors of course...tracking technology has improved, telecommunications, that sort of thing. But still...no one talks about it anymore.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:02,
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Ah, NOW you're talkingThat's a good point....we ALL* have pretty good digital cameras on us all the time, yet no one's used one to snap an alien. INTERESTING.
*we do not ALL have good cameras on us at all times
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:06,
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Also the modern obsession with flash phones would meanthat if we DID see a UFO, taking a picture of it would be the very first thing we'd think of.
Unfortunately the second would probably be tweeting the picture with the caption "UFOMFG"
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:11, Reply)
There was one in russia the other day after it had been shot down by the illuminti(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:06,
Reply)
That was just a publicity stunt to drive up tourism and scare the JapsDUH
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:08, Reply)
Let's all enjoy thesewww.popsci.com/science/article/2013-02/best-russian-meteorite-conspiracy-theories
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:10,
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Terrible bullying of Plumdozer(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:23,
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As your attorney I recommend this course of action(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:08,
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I might start breaking bad watches.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:08,
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I saw some arrogant geek outside Cafe nero earlier, wearing sunglasses in the shade, looking smug and with a shit "american style" chin beardhe also had a breaking bad t-shirt on and for that reason I'm out
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:09,
Reply)
Sound reasoning right here.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:11,
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Hai, i need to aska question no k?i have copied a long list of email address from an email, all seperated by semi colons, but when pasted into excel they drop into one cell, I want them to have a cell each.
any ideas?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:11,
Reply)
Used to be something like File - import/export - export to fileBut I'm not at my work machine, obv. I don't have excel on this.
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Kroney, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:12,
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Import and use ; as a delimiter(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:12,
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I gonna need more explict instructions...(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:13,
Reply)
Paste all the email addresses into a Notepad or Word documentSave
Open Excel
File - Open
Change dropdown to .doc or .txt, whatever you saved as
Select Delimited - Next
Clear everything apart from semicolon
Click Finish
Profit
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:16,
Reply)
Surely Text To Columns would be quicker?(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:20,
Reply)
You are now almost qualified to work in ITCan you be unhelpful and patronising on the phone?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:19,
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Clearly the act of not asking a question has beena roaring success(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:25,
Reply)
WANT:www.wickedlasers.com.hk/arctic
Dunno what I'd use it for, but that's never stopped me before.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:29,
Reply)
yeah man it's totes amazing it can burst balloons and shit(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:31,
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30m Cablelolz(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:36,
Reply)
Tallest business secretary in history, FACT(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 14:40,
Reply)
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