b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 1892324 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1

« Go Back | Popular

Short notice changes.
Ever had someone change at short notice that works really well for you?

Mrs B. has gone to bed not feeling well. Shame for her.

However this means I get all of the wine, as much of our supper as I want and to watch on the TV. then if she's doing ok I may pop out for last orders.

You?
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:32, 293 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
What is Mrs B suffering with?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:35, Reply)
Stomach/ period stuff.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:37, Reply)
Same as Jeff then?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:38, Reply)
Exactly.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:38, Reply)
Meh, women. Fuck all wrong with her I'd imagine.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:41, Reply)
Quite. Works for me though.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:41, Reply)
No.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:36, Reply)
I was hoping you'd be dead by now.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:38, Reply)
Oh man, first I get called a mouse, now this.
How will I cope?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:39, Reply)
Mouse?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:41, Reply)
Where?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:42, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/ihurtmyrudebits2/post1891948
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:42, Reply)
Can't see anything. Whoever it was must have me on 2.0

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:43, Reply)
legless

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:44, Reply)
Ah yes. I logged out to reply to the fucking twat.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:45, Reply)
Cheers.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:46, Reply)
I've got the house to myself most of tomorrow
I’ll make breakfast for the little man go and see my Mother, then, I’m gonna totes just Chillax for the rest of the day, not really short notice but it will work really well for me
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:43, Reply)
'Chillax' is not a word.
HTH.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:44, Reply)
Is it an Adverb by any chance?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:45, Reply)
IT'S A VERB.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:46, Reply)
CHEERS

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:47, Reply)


(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:47, Reply)
Tired old meme is tired and old.
Let's not bother eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:50, Reply)
#doesn't post picture of Britney.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:51, Reply)
who made you the boss around here?
Prick.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:51, Reply)
It's a suggestion, nothing more, you vacuous clown footed wanker.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:52, Reply)
Where did this clown-foot thing come from?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:53, Reply)
I have size 12s.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:54, Reply)
Does that not make your feet as long as you are tall?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:55, Reply)
It does you know.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:56, Reply)
I suggest that you bite down on a cyanide capsule.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:54, Reply)
I used to have a gaffer who said that you should always have plans up your sleeve to E
In case plan A fails.

I always have and am therefore NEVER caught out.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 19:57, Reply)
Oh Jeff the Clown meme here you go
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1885008
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:06, Reply)
Well this is going splendidly eh?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:32, Reply)
There have been worse threads.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:33, Reply)
Quiet innit.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:34, Reply)
I blame you.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:35, Reply)
We're saved! B3th is here.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:36, Reply)
Alright saggy?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:36, Reply)
Not bad Titch.
Except I've got a spot on my face the size of your head.
Bad Times.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:39, Reply)
I am exceptionally tired, but don't think I will sleep. Weird.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:40, Reply)
Have you tried drinking yourself into unconsciousness?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:42, Reply)
Too much to do tomorrow. Also, not proper sleep is it?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:43, Reply)
Just cuddle up to your teddy and have your wife read you some Enid Blyton.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:45, Reply)
Read above dickhead. Wife unwell.
Your attention to detail is another poor aspect of you miserable life.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:47, Reply)
Of you miserable life?
Good attention to detail there, shit for brains.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:48, Reply)
Ok, you got me there.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:51, Reply)
Wanker.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:53, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892435

Cockhead.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:56, Reply)
Did you not even read Jeff's post?
Nice attention to detail, dickhead.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:58, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892455
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:03, Reply)
That was rather the point.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:45, Reply)
I'm doing high-end gaming
On the dart board in my attic.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:38, Reply)
That *is* quite high.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:39, Reply)
My attic is the highest point west of the Urals.
I tell that to random women in the street - it's a TRUE FACT.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:42, Reply)
TD is shorter than me, sad times.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:43, Reply)
I am not a tall man
But I carry myself with profound dignity and a self-assurance - based on results and success - that entitles me to hold my head high.

Thank you.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:48, Reply)
You're a nice guy.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:49, Reply)
I must be.
I didn't think I was but business says I'm a nice guy.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:58, Reply)
Alright Battered
I'm the king of short notices, I hate doing that, but can't help it.

I got some of these: www.cookiedoughbites.com/products/ , the cinamon and origional ones. They're pretty bland to tell you the truth, really not worth it.

I left getting Ma' that coffee maker 'till it was too late to get it delivered, so I went down Pearsons, and it turns out it was £35 instead of £55 I've seen online, I think its misslabeled, she said it was brand new item that had just come in. So that was a bit of a result.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:47, Reply)
I get really fucked off by people crying off at the last minute.
Which is ironic, as if I ever cancel anything, it's generally at the last minute.

According to my old mother, the card I posted her by First Class on thursday has still not arrived. *tuts*
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:50, Reply)
I'm afraid 8 times out of 10 I can't help it.
I feel really bad about it, I actually had a date today but had to pull out 'cus I was bad for most of the day. Luckly most people who know me are alright and know I have last-minute problems.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:29, Reply)
Did you see my offer about gnocchi recipes in the previous thread?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:50, Reply)
Oh, yes, sorry I didn't reply.
I'm up for that thanks, especially if you've got a no-flaffing about one that I could do after work.

I've found a good source of poshish mushrooms today, my not-quite-so-local Waitrose does Shiitake, Enoki & Buna Shimeji...got any ideas for them? I was thinking of doing a noodle broth with them, but I'm open to suggestions.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:26, Reply)
I've just order some food.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:52, Reply)
Get them to stick it straight down the pan
save you the bother later.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:53, Reply)
It'll probably end up being rejected.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:54, Reply)
What have you order?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:53, Reply)
Curry.
The way I see it, if I can keep this in, then I'm on the road to recovery.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:54, Reply)
Tactically a good idea. Strategically possibly not.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:54, Reply)
You're probably right.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:56, Reply)

probably
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:57, Reply)
What have you order?
Good attention to detail there, shit-for-brains.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:54, Reply)
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:55, Reply)
ZING!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:56, Reply)
Not a zing, it was deliberate.
Soz babygirl :'(
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:57, Reply)
Jiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiimmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Hill.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:57, Reply)
No, deffo deliberate.
Soz babygirl.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:01, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892455
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:03, Reply)
Oh yeah.
But then I'm ill, so I'm allowed to post rubbish.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:58, Reply)
Don't care.
It was funny.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:59, Reply)
What, my attention to detail, in noticing what Jeff had typed, against your failure to spot it, was funny?
Yeah, nice one tubbo, nice one.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:00, Reply)
It was what we, in the biz, call 'a call back'.
My internal sitcom writer couldn't let that one go.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:01, Reply)
But it was a joke I'd beaten you to.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:02, Reply)
That was your own joke.
My joke was re-quoting your own abuse at you.

Though yeah, I can see why you typed what you did.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:04, Reply)
Just a shame Battered is still running around rubbing his chin like he's a fifth-former in 1991.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:06, Reply)
He never outgrew the uniform.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:08, Reply)
He still wears it so he can try and cop off with the fourth-formers after assembly.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:14, Reply)
The feeling of Legless defence is strong here.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:02, Reply)
Battsy baby.
Do you want me to flag up every joke with a honking great neon sign just so that you can keep up?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:03, Reply)
This and many more are the reasons chicks did you.

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:02, Reply)
Attention to detail gives chicks wide-ons like you wouldn't believe.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:04, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892455
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:04, Reply)
I typed that on purpose, as Jeff had put ' I've just order some food'
Do you expect me to put (sic) every time?

Nice powers of observation.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:56, Reply)
Chinny reckon.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:57, Reply)
Doubt me as much as you want.
That's twice now your attention to detail has been shown to be lacking.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 20:59, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892455
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:02, Reply)
Even though it's shit on here this evening.
I'm sure we're all having a much more fun night than Monty.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:02, Reply)
I just hope the hotel he's staying in has nice windows.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:03, Reply)
Where is Monty tonight?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:04, Reply)
Wedding, innit.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:05, Reply)
Oh yeah.
He's wearing a Ben Sherman suit, right?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:05, Reply)
I bet he's wearing winkle pickers too.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:07, Reply)
I bet he's dancing to 'Come on Eileen'.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:08, Reply)
I bet he's coming on Eileen.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:09, Reply)
I bet he's so off his head he is just leaning

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:11, Reply)
Don't know about that. Some of Lusty's mates are quite tidy. Plus, at least some free booze, even if the bar isn't.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:04, Reply)
And you wonder why you have a reputation as a sleazy prick.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:05, Reply)
I've never thought that Batts was sleazy
Nor that much of a prick
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:09, Reply)
Did you miss Popppetgate?
And the constant arseholery?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:11, Reply)
You do enjoy creating waves for no reason don’t you?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:11, Reply)
HH
You do realise that just because Battered and I are openly rude to each other on here, it doesn't necessarily mean we're actually like that behind the scenes?

Even though we are.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:13, Reply)
They're both angry little men.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:13, Reply)
Batts occasional says nice things

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:15, Reply)
He's a little cutie.
He loves it when I use him as a ventriloquist's dummy.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:16, Reply)
Says someone shorter and less intelligent than me.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:17, Reply)
I've never had my IQ tested.
One, it's a flawed system; two, it's pointless except for showing off with.

Though when I did my school's entrance exam I was in the top 10%.

So how are you going to quantify our relative intelligence?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:18, Reply)
Depends on the scale of measurement
Wechsler Scale is the most accurate. I scored 148 my lowest attempt.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:20, Reply)
Like I said, never done any intelligence tests.
I don't agree with the principle.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:21, Reply)
Only because you know you wouldn't do very well.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:24, Reply)
I'd do fine.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:26, Reply)
Anything over 140 in Wechsler is
'Genius or near genius'
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:23, Reply)
Like I said, it's for showing off with.
I was top streamed at school, fast tracked as well, sat and passed S Level English at 17, got extremely high marks on my degree.

I don't feel that I have to have an IQ test score as any additional validation.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:26, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892446
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:31, Reply)
Whatevs.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:33, Reply)
And before you start banging on about attention to detail again, I'm well aware that the 'head on a stick' quote from the previous thread was Edmund Kemper, not Ed Gein.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:24, Reply)
Totally relaxing whilst watching one of my favourite TV programmes.
Foyles War. Excellent.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:16, Reply)
You were right.
Food wasn't a great plan.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:23, Reply)
Sorry to hear that.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:24, Reply)
No food, no beer, no tabs.
Being ill is shit.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:25, Reply)
Why no tabs?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:28, Reply)
Don't fancy them, on account of feeling like shit.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:33, Reply)
I miss smoking.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:34, Reply)
Aw.
Actual, genuine sympathy here. And I don't say that often.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:35, Reply)
what is sleazy about saying Lusty has some attractive friends?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:21, Reply)
They're about 15 years younger than you.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:21, Reply)
Erm. No. Why do assume that all of her friends are 24?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:23, Reply)
Just let him have the last say
Pfffffffttttttt
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:25, Reply)
Most of my friends are around my age.
This is how it tends to work.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:27, Reply)
What friends?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:28, Reply)
A genius-level IQ and this is the standard of zing you come up with.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:29, Reply)
BUT YOU SIR ARE A CUNT

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:45, Reply)
At least you're safe in the knowledge that I'll never be using the 'genius level' zing on you xx

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:48, Reply)
You and the PALMER SISTERS are all the same age
AMIRITE
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:28, Reply)
And mother palm.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:32, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892516
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:33, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892523
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:36, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1892516
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:41, Reply)
You being able to see up their skirts
HEhehheheee
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:22, Reply)
So how has you're day been B3thany?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:21, Reply)
M'y day has been quiet but relaxing, thank you very much for asking.
Apart from watching the rugby, where I got all cross and disappointed.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:30, Reply)
I was hoping PD would pick up on my you're to your thing

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:33, Reply)
Was that another of your cunning traps?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:34, Reply)
don't know what YOUR on about

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:35, Reply)
fucking hell, this prick still here?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:25, Reply)
MMPS you need to narrow that one down

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:26, Reply)
the short arse that done the embezzling and shagged the 14 year old polish prostitute

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:43, Reply)
Bartleby?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:46, Reply)
isn't that the dull one that likes real ale?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:52, Reply)
Is that not The Brigadier?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:53, Reply)
hang on, is that not the one that beheaded a tramp with a samurai sword?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:55, Reply)
Yeah
But the police weren't interested.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:57, Reply)
would have made a great record for them, no. 1 for sure!

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:58, Reply)
oh man that's the funniest thing all night lol

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:03, Reply)
totes rofl

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:09, Reply)
INR!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:12, Reply)
Are you Battered's white knight tonight?
He must be so pleased.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:53, Reply)
Are you Plumdozers?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:56, Reply)
is that the fat mental cat lady one who shags anything?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:57, Reply)
YM you mean?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:58, Reply)
is that the one who stole drugs a pretended to like football before whining about chicks thinking he was a dull bellend?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:59, Reply)
Yeah, that was Monty.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:00, Reply)
I thought that was the Purple Bowling ball one?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:00, Reply)
hang on, isn't that the one who got sharted on during sex?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:10, Reply)
Nah, that was me.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:11, Reply)
I thought you was the one they all post on the populol page calling you a cunt

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:13, Reply)
Nah, that's you.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:15, Reply)
I'm pretty sure I don't finger dogs bums

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:18, Reply)
which one keeps doing a flounce then comes back?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:19, Reply)
That's you.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:19, Reply)
RIGHT I'M OFF
wanker
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:25, Reply)
JOB DONE.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:28, Reply)
Alright MMPS?
I went to see that Daniel Avery the other week.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:27, Reply)
oh yeah? sounds well hip!

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:44, Reply)
It was him and then Erol Alkan.
It was shit hot.

Missed you not being there xx
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:47, Reply)
hang on, why didn't you txt me?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:52, Reply)
Oh m8 I would have done but I only got guest listed at the last moment.
Next time, yeah?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:54, Reply)
pinkie fucking promise

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:56, Reply)
I have a mate who puts tunes out on Soma
Can poss get GL for Slam nights.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:00, Reply)

have a mate who puts tunes out on Soma Can ss get GL for Slam nights o
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:04, Reply)
And where have you been for the last few weeks you monumental twat? xx

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:29, Reply)
your mum.
lolz
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:44, Reply)
you lucky chap.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:48, Reply)
oh aye, wore her like a hat.

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:51, Reply)
woh woh woh woh woh MMPS in heeeee-house.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:32, Reply)
alright gonz

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:44, Reply)
Not bad, you cool?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:06, Reply)
all sweet here gonz.

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:10, Reply)
More sycophancy for mmpso
Pricks
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:37, Reply)
Sycophancy turns my fucking stomach.
How are you, the LOVELY Tangles?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:41, Reply)
I'm LOVELY, as it happens.
Just scoffed a delicious paneer coconut fry with chapattis, washed down with some LOVELY beer and am about to go and use my CROSS VOICE on some seven year olds who should be asleep.
How is life since you decided to run away with the circus?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:46, Reply)
This will be you telling them firmly that they want to go to the woods to see some puppies.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:47, Reply)
Hey, I have to come back through those woods on my own you know

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:49, Reply)
I hadn't thought of that.
Take a torch with you.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:50, Reply)
Life's good ta.
I might gaz you with a detailed update letter, plus a drawing of Hartley Hare's cock xx
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:49, Reply)
Wicked
I ain't gonna read it tonight, mind.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:51, Reply)
I WON'T BOTHER THEN, GOD, WHY ARE YOU SUCH A PRICK?!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:52, Reply)
you can get pills for that now.
what do the voices tell you tangles? do they want you to touch my scrotum?

I'm cool with that btw, you massive bender.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:42, Reply)
Probably just start with holding hands, if that's ok.
Might put one hand on your knee later. We'll see how it goes.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:48, Reply)
just touch my fucking balls.

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:51, Reply)
ok

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:58, Reply)
don't you dare lie about this!
on the count of three.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:00, Reply)
yeah, what's this prick mmps doing here, stinking up the joint?
lolz, only joking, that's monty.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:41, Reply)
Hey Mumps!
where ya been?
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:43, Reply)
battered's mum
lolz
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 21:44, Reply)
A popular destination I gather.
Did you know you can have a go on his missus half price with ever proof of purchase?
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:12, Reply)
YOUN A POOF OF PURCHASE!!!
lolz
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:18, Reply)
that'll be dozer.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:19, Reply)
Terrible bullying of the Dozer by his board foe, CQ.
:'(
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:23, Reply)
nah, I'm not your foe, I'm liking you now.
we are best buds.

you baggy trouser-ed, clown-shoed pink-wearing poof
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:31, Reply)
I don't wear pink.
Soz to be the bearer etc.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:34, Reply)
I seem to remember you strongly implying you did
but I cannot be fucked arguing the point, not do I care that much.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:38, Reply)
I only wear it as detail in accessories.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:39, Reply)
ahh, so you do wear it then.
add 'fibbing' to the above description. also 'meths drinking'
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:41, Reply)
LETS SEE HIM WORM HIS WAY OUT OFF THIS ONE

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:43, Reply)
What I was getting at is that I wouldn't wear a solid pink shirt, but will wear such things as a navy blue and pink striped tie.
Detailing, not the main colour. So it wouldn't be accurate to say that I was wearing pink, just that I was wearing some pink.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:47, Reply)
so, you wear pink then?

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:55, Reply)
Define 'wearing pink'.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:56, Reply)
To carry or have on the body or about the person as a covering, equipment, ornament, or the like
a color varying from light crimson to pale reddish purple.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:01, Reply)
Yes, but does this mean solid pink?
What if the only pink is a very thin stripe, in a shirt with half a dozen or so different coloured stripes?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:04, Reply)
by the above definition this would count.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:05, Reply)
Really though?
You know those Paul Smith shirts which are classic PS stripes? Loads of different colours? If someone was wearing that, would that be wearing pink, or wearing a shirt with some pink in it?

It's a subtle but crucial difference.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:07, Reply)
I remember when Saturday nights of here were music links.
God, they were the days.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:44, Reply)
dozer posting dance-music link in 5, 4, 3, 2,....

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:46, Reply)
I dun posted one just for you xx

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:50, Reply)
fuckin' called it
predictable little bugger.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:51, Reply)
It even has its own dance!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:52, Reply)
One bad apple Jeff that's all it takes

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:47, Reply)

youtu.be/TRveIIe4uAs
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:47, Reply)
made me laugh
bastard.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:52, Reply)
I was banking on it.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:54, Reply)
damn it clown-shoes, if you ever come to civilization I may buy you a pint.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:56, Reply)
I'm in London at least once a month.
I travel a fair bit with work. I'm in Nottingham next week, Edinburgh next month.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:57, Reply)
well, the offer stands.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:01, Reply)
I dunno CQ, you've said some pretty mean things about me online.
:'(
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:08, Reply)
Your call shortarse.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:18, Reply)
I dunno CQ, all the bullying's left me pretty traumatised.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:21, Reply)
yeah
right
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:30, Reply)
you have a vicious turn of phrase when your back's up

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:33, Reply)
yeah, I can be a cunt at times.
but i'm dead soft IRL.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:59, Reply)
At times?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:07, Reply)
now who's being viscous?

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:09, Reply)
Are you calling me thick?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:10, Reply)
Yo can get Viagra fir that

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:16, Reply)
For the last time I will not fuck you
no matter how much you drug me.
(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:27, Reply)
What about me?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:28, Reply)
I'd rather do swipe.

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:31, Reply)
Man that's harsh.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:31, Reply)
Pfffffffffft

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 10 Mar 2013, 0:32, Reply)
I've just watched some sort of sci-fi film but without the sci bit.
It was about women getting equal pay to men.

What sort of crazy talk is that.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:51, Reply)
Holy shit, that's crazy talk.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:52, Reply)
Yeah. They'll be wanting the vote next.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:53, Reply)
That's nothing, I went to Bradford last week and there were brown people DRIVING!
Not just as taxi drivers, but driving their own cars!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 22:55, Reply)
They must have stolen them.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:05, Reply)
Terrible racism here.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:08, Reply)
Sounds like an episode of Black Mirror or sutin

(I helped save b3ta! Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Sat 9 Mar 2013, 23:01, Reply)

« Go Back | Reply To This »

Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1