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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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86/2
I actually, literally transcend sport. What do you transcend?
Alt: The KFC Wicked bucket is a work of genius. What do you hate yourself for liking?
92/2.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:00,
245 replies,
latest was 12 years ago)
FUCK YEAH!
Seem them wickets start to tumble.
After lunch.
(
Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:01,
Reply)
I had sushi for lunch thanks for asking.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:02,
Reply)
What sort?
(
Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:05,
Reply)
Abokado bought
Edamame rocket salad. Nigiri and the one with the salmon on top. 8 bits.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:06,
Reply)
Nice
I'm going to have a sandwich. I'll be sure to wring my hands afterwards.
(
Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:10,
Reply)
Good lad.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:12,
Reply)
Let's take a moment to relive this smashing moment of internet.
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1744035
(
Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:22,
Reply)
i DO have a cracking arse
it looks a lot like your face
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:39,
Reply)
Hairy, spotty and stained with baked beans at the corner of the largest hole?
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Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:46,
Reply)
those aren't beans...
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:49,
Reply)
I could fucking murder a bit of real sushi for lunch.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:42,
Reply)
Not a bad start.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:01,
Reply)
Anderson is bowling.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:02,
Reply)
bit unfair on usman though, sounds like he didn't hit it
(
The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:02,
Reply)
Fuck him. You win some, you lose some.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:02,
Reply)
Fuck him. You win some, you lose some.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:02,
Reply)
Yeah, you tell 'em!
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:04,
Reply)
YOU told 'em.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:05,
Reply)
I did. I certainly did.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:06,
Reply)
Fuck him, You win some, you lose some.
(
Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:05,
Reply)
Yeah, you tell 'em! (Again)
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:06,
Reply)
The bowler's Holding the batman's Willey.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:04,
Reply)
Your thoughts on DRS?
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:05,
Reply)
They both agreed to use it
the Australians should just learn to use it properly.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:06,
Reply)
Everyone is fine with it until they get a bad decision. Then they whine, but there are far fewer wrong decisions with it in place.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:08,
Reply)
Whinging Aussies.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:08,
Reply)
I was asking Stunned. Not you. I couldn't give a shit what you think.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:08,
Reply)
You are mean spirited.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:09,
Reply)
Nah, it's just that Al is a cunt.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:10,
Reply)
Why hasn't anyone made me aware of this before?
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:12,
Reply)
What you've got to remember is that Al is a sour, unpleasant little man, who spends his time (when he's not digging holes for work) mindlessly vandalising people's cars & generally behaving like a prick.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:16,
Reply)
I think a rather small pot just called a much taller kettle black here.
(
Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:16,
Reply)
I hate the fact I am agreeing with you for the second time in one day.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:18,
Reply)
+ who deletes posts and doesn't own up
(
Reginald Donkeyfuck, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:23,
Reply)
What you've got to remember is that Battered is fundamentally unloveable.
In addition, he forgets a lot of things. Like, you'll thank him for something, and he'll forget it happened and then hold a grudge against you for not saying thanks, even though you did.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:13,
Reply)
Things Battereds ex-wife said last time they spoke.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:09,
Reply)
Nowhere near as good as people make out.
Steve Martin is a prick and Michael Caine is merely going through the motions.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:06,
Reply)
I think it's a pretty good film.
It's one of the first films I owned on VHS.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:07,
Reply)
my brother loves it.
But then he also loves 'Bad Santa'.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:08,
Reply)
Me too.
Top drawer.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:09,
Reply)
No, you he hates.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:14,
Reply)
Is that because you force me to spend time in your presence?
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:16,
Reply)
Is that why your brother hates me?
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:19,
Reply)
Be quiet.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:08,
Reply)
The Jerk, Man with 2 Brains, 3 Amigos and Bowfinger
And that's it
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:18,
Reply)
Steve Martin is as funny as cancer of the ring.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:19,
Reply)
^ this ^
He's no Jeff Dunham.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:20,
Reply)
Who is, old boy?
I keeeeeel you.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:21,
Reply)

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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:23,
Reply)
n r
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:24,
Reply)
Piff paff poof.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:26,
Reply)
gertcha
of the in my
He's great, even makes Father of the Bride watchable.
(
Reginald Donkeyfuck, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:21,
Reply)
Roxanne and The Pink Panther are classics.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:24,
Reply)
hahahahaha
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:25,
Reply)
It's alright Monce, I don't think he's being serious
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:27,
Reply)
OK
Three Amigos and The Pink Panther 2
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
That would be pretty funny on harters
(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:22,
Reply)
:(
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
I hate to say it but I agree with Al.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:08,
Reply)
Alt: YM.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:13,
Reply)
She hates you back, you little shit.
Even my Mam is taller than you. lol.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:15,
Reply)
AAs mum is taller and she's 6 feet under
(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:18,
Reply)
YM is a wicked bucket.
(
localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:18,
Reply)
Average, certainly.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:20,
Reply)
Alt: what makes it wild?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:15,
Reply)
Eh?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:16,
Reply)
I read wicked as wild, please pretend I asked what made it wicked
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:20,
Reply)
Because people are lovin it, lovin it, lovin it.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:20,
Reply)
like this
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:21,
Reply)
I built some lego
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:18,
Reply)
Your wife must have been really patient to stay there with her legs open for that length of time
(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:21,
Reply)
She fell asleep while he was still trying to stick the first two bricks together
(
localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:25,
Reply)
Chafes does that Duplo, too.
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localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:26,
Reply)
That's because I cock dropped her earlier.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:26,
Reply)
I just ate the Thai spicy one of these:
www.thegrocer.co.uk/fmcg/metcalfes-itsu-pot-noodles-offer-unrivalled-quality/342959.articleIt was really fucking nice. I heartily recommend it. What you can't tell from the picture is that they're fucking massive, too.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:22,
Reply)
I recommend you shove it up your cock end and shit out a wok
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:22,
Reply)
Fuck off with your 10p noodles.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:25,
Reply)
NO WAI MAN £2.25 SE'SLY
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
Woah, check you out spending the big bucks
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
There's a washing machine and a lightbulb chez monce ruing those noodles.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:30,
Reply)
Ha ha
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:31,
Reply)
week 1 after payday innit
I'll be dining like Daniel Pelka by the 15th
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:30,
Reply)
Ooh. You horrible cunt :(
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:31,
Reply)
Can't actually believe I posted that
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:33,
Reply)
You could delete it.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:33,
Reply)
I could indeed.
But hey, I called Damilola Taylor a 'cunt' yesterday so eff it
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:35,
Reply)
Yes, but I agreed with that.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:35,
Reply)
Because he was black?
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:39,
Reply)
Yes.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:42,
Reply)
Hi, my name is Pelka. I live on the second flooooor.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:34,
Reply)
STAY ABOUT FROM MY BINS
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:35,
Reply)
Ewwww.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:35,
Reply)
Ohhhh....I was wondering what to have for lunch
and there is a sainsburys close by
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
Get on it, lad
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
Did they have the chicken one there? It is after all THURSDAY
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:30,
Reply)
they just had the regular and spicy Thai ones here.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:31,
Reply)
:( The link did say the chicken one later in the year
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:32,
Reply)
I've been approached about a 12 month contract, which would require spending one week a month in Pakistan.
Very good money, but I'm not sure...
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:27,
Reply)
You should go, no ifs or buds
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
FFS.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
Thank you. Come again.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:31,
Reply)
Yes please.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:32,
Reply)
If I was being yoooooo..
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:32,
Reply)
Oooooh LBW!
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Reginald Donkeyfuck, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
is the good money what you'll pay for your new teenage wife?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
I never want to be married to, or live with, anyone ever again. Trufax.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:30,
Reply)
i had my heart set on sainsburys vegetarian sushi for lunch
because theirs is even nicer than the little japanese place by my office that makes it freshly. but the careless cunts had sold out. now i have a falafel wrap from apostrophe and a vague nagging sense of dissatisfaction. it's full of tomatoes which i had to pull out; i hate myself for NOT liking them, as the little cunts get in everything.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:28,
Reply)
I gave micro falafel the other day. She threw it at me.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:29,
Reply)
falafel is the shit
but throwing it at you demonstrates her good sense
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:31,
Reply)
My love for you is very flimsy, your falafel is euphemimsy
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:36,
Reply)
That's beautiful
Imma get a tattoo of that, in Hebrew, on my leg.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:38,
Reply)
I'm feeling slightly hateful today, Monts
Why is this?
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:48,
Reply)
Sometime's life is just annoying, my old pal.
I find making off-colour remarks about tragic stories from the day's news can really rouse one's spirits.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:50,
Reply)
Dunno
things like that often make me feel a little darker. I'm a bit mixed up at the moment. Like putting your hand into a bag of haribos and pulling out a foam shrimp. It's like "woah...you're not supposed to be there! Where did you come from?"
You know, like that.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:52,
Reply)
I sure do!
Is it one of those things where something specific is troubling you or can you not put your finger on it?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:53,
Reply)
It's more like there are 100 things bothering me
And I can only put my finger on 12 of them.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:57,
Reply)
Are any of them bitches?
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localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:58,
Reply)
Not as such, no
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:00,
Reply)
I didn't know you were a mod
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:00,
Reply)
BOKKO!
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:01,
Reply)
I'm trying to sell all my old dogging equipment on eBay.
Not had any bids but there's loads of people watching.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:52,
Reply)
wots ur ebay name ill by it lol
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:53,
Reply)
Hi Jeff!
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:53,
Reply)
Is badly made falafel a euphemism?
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:32,
Reply)
It is now.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:33,
Reply)
A 'euphemimsy' if you will.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:34,
Reply)
Don't waste your time with that fancy nonsense. I just had a lovely lunch, I think the dish was called 'a coffee' or something similar/
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:56,
Reply)
Real world problems here folks.
(
Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:37,
Reply)
I transcend the petty morals of bourgeois society.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:36,
Reply)
As Taylor and Pelka can attest.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:38,
Reply)
Sounds like a legal practice in a small market town.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:39,
Reply)
That's an awfully long winded way of saying "I'm a cunt"
(
localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:39,
Reply)
I bet he could say it windier.
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Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:41,
Reply)
"Oink"?
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localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:42,
Reply)
You'd be right to place that bet.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:43,
Reply)
I fly in the face of the socio-political zeitgeist
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:51,
Reply)
but that's just me, you know
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:51,
Reply)
I both naysay and poo-poo the small-minded social mores of the hoi polloi, personally.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:53,
Reply)
both naysay and poo-poo the small-minded social mores of the hoi polloi, personally.have annual membership at Chariots and love lying in the urinals whilst old men piss on me
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:55,
Reply)
I used to immerse myself in the durm and strang of all modern psycho-communal paradigms
but I realised that all of that was total nonsense, so I put the xbox on instead, you know.
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:56,
Reply)
yer
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:56,
Reply)
What are we doing, Monty?
I mean really...
what are we doing? We're not grown-ups are we...what are we? Where are we headed? What's the next big thing?
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:58,
Reply)
YM's clunge
liddlebiddaphilosophyladiesangennelmen
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localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:00,
Reply)
'Techbag breakhouse', if young Plumdozer is to be believed, which he most certainly isn't.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:01,
Reply)
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
Oh Monts...I'm losing my grip.
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:02,
Reply)
grip hats
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:05,
Reply)
I never even had them, that's the sad thing
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:06,
Reply)
Ohhhhhhh...NOES
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:07,
Reply)
You know what, TH?
I don't think it means anything at all.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:08,
Reply)
Alt: nonce tranny scat porn
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 13:48,
Reply)
Not related to nonce tranny scat porn
Nice choice with the noodles I didn't realise it's this big
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:03,
Reply)
Yeah proper meal sized
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:05,
Reply)
Cooked noodles not dried three sachets
The spork looks a bit GHAY though
(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:06,
Reply)
TOS FTW!!
(
Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:09,
Reply)
I don't even know what this means
(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:14,
Reply)
Original Series Spork wasnt a gayer unlike the Jayjay Abrahams version!
LOL!!
(
Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:16,
Reply)
Pardon?
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:17,
Reply)
Well, looks like SOMEONE left their Spork ears at home today, hmmmmmm????
(
Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:18,
Reply)
That is illegible, Cupstain.
(
localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:25,
Reply)
KEPTIN! ZIS IS NUT PWUSSIBULL!
(
Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:34,
Reply)
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2382352/Chocolatier-Simon-Dunn-gives-frank-explanation-customers-shut-Wilmslow-shop.htmlthis is really near my dad, we used to go for coffee all the time. the british high street is properly fucked.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:03,
Reply)
That's really depressing
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:07,
Reply)
it's true though
places like wilmslow will be full of supermarkets, restaurants and beauty salons. i was on the high street there with my friend and she needed a cable for her dvd player - there was literally nowhere left to go to buy it. places that are less affluent will end up with desolate high streets. it doesn't take much effort for people to support local shops as well as shopping online ffs.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:09,
Reply)
Shop owners don't have a right to be supported just because they aren't a supermarket.
I don't support local shops unless they sell something I want. Otherwise fuck 'em
(
Peej, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:14,
Reply)
i think that's all they are asking for
people who do want what they sell to use them. it's not really just about local shops, it's about all retailers. will you be patting yourself on the back for saving a tenner on your holiday when thompson goes bust and thousands more people are shoved onto the dole and your pension makes no money because the fund isn't receiving rents from its property portfolio?
it's just about making a bit of effort to spread custom, not to change your lifestyle completely.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:21,
Reply)
I'll buy from a local shop if they can match online prices.
If they can't, well fine. I don't owe anybody a living except me.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:24,
Reply)
no you won't
you're dyed in the wool online. fine, but this country will be a damn sight poorer when the retailers are all online, employing far fewer people, and you can't just pop out to browse for books or nice stuff for your flat any more.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:33,
Reply)
Basically your entire argument is "I like it better the way it is, I don't want it to change waaah"
But, as you've admitted yourself, you don't shop on the high street anymore than anybody else does.
At least I'm being fucking honest.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:35,
Reply)
where did i admit that?
i said i try really hard to split my business - eg books. i buy about 30% from second hand or independent retailers, about 30% on amazon, and about 40% in waterstones
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:36,
Reply)
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2035209You use supermarkets and online as much as anybody else. Plenty of people shop on the High Street and they STILL can't compete. It's like HMV and the giant panda. If you can't adapt, you die.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:39,
Reply)
omg it's like you're deliberately not listening
if everybody just split their shopping a bit, it would be fine.
there is no need not to use supermarkets. and no need not to use online. just use a bit of everything.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:43,
Reply)
Why should I split my shopping?
I don't owe these people
(
Peej, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 15:36,
Reply)
Convert the abandoned high street shops into social housing
kill two birds with one stone.
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:28,
Reply)
and where will they work?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:31,
Reply)
from home
earning big money for stuffing envelopes and phoning vulnerable pensioners as "Windows Support".
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:47,
Reply)
Stop buying things in supermarkets then
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:10,
Reply)
i try v hard to split my shopping
a bit online, a bit on the high street, a bit in shopping centres, and a bit in supermarkets. there'd be plenty of cash for all retailers if people made a bit of an effort to mix it up; it doesn't need to be all or nothing.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:12,
Reply)
The local retailers can't compete with the prices, it's just the way it is
I'm anti-battery hen farming in principle, but I have a family to feed...so it's 7 quid for one chicken, or 3 for a tenner. Sorry local butcher, but I'm off to Tesco. This is the way of the world and it's only going to continue that way.
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:13,
Reply)
it's not a good way for the world to go, in my view
it's not like i preach about only buying local, or only buying organic, because i don't and would be fucking hypocritical if i did. but at the same time, ending up with everything being bought at the same massive supermarket is pretty fucking depressing
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:18,
Reply)
I disagree
I know what you're saying...it's a shame for someone who's worked their whole lives building a business, only to be undercut by a giant supermarket...but this is just what happens. We don't buy our milk from a farm, because it's more convenient to get it from a shop. We don't go to a tailor, because there are loads of shops that sell clothes off the peg. We don't buy stamps, because we have sms and email.
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:24,
Reply)
... and then people whine because their clothes are being made by children in a sweatshop
or their burgers are full of horse
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:29,
Reply)
Nope
Because if you complain about the sweatshops, they end up getting closed down...then loads of people who are GENUINELY on the poverty line LITERALLY starve to death.
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:32,
Reply)
lots of people are stupid, though
wah wah poor children, i had no idea, despite the fact that i only paid £5 for this shirt AND skirt
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:34,
Reply)
It's what happens when you only have a few massive retailers who can force the suppliers to accept less money for their goods
than it costs to make them, and therefore have to rely on either government subsidies, or they go bust.
(
Bazongaloid, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:53,
Reply)
If I don't need to buy anything from a local shop why should I make an effort to support them so they can stay open for me not to buy anything from them?
I don't watch football and my local team is going bust, why should I give a fuck about saving them?
(
Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:14,
Reply)
sure, nobody should ever have any independent enterprise
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:16,
Reply)
Not if it isn't sustainable, no
(
Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:16,
Reply)
that's right
now, get your apron on, tesco will pay you a fiver to sweep that floor
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:18,
Reply)
But not next week - zero hours contract.
Pay the rent you say?
(
localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:23,
Reply)
That's a ridiculous statement to make.
"I can't really be bothered to walk to the shops, let's take the car"
"YEAH AND EVERYBODY SHOULD HAVE THEIR LEGS CUT OFF AND LETS CHOP DOWN ALL THE RAINFORESTS WHILE WE'RE AT IT"
Have some perspective.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:23,
Reply)
but by "the shops" you mean a massive giant warehouse where everything looks the same?
lovely.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:30,
Reply)
Well no, in this case it'll be a van bringing me my goods that I ordered online to my door.
You know, the way it already happens?
Swap "the shops" for "the beach" if it makes you feel better.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:33,
Reply)
choosing stuff online is fine sometimes
other times it's just not the same.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:34,
Reply)
Everyone complained when the last of our traditional cinemas closed in Portsmouth
I reasoned that if we all went there to watch movies instead of the non-sticky floored, much bigger seats VUE cinema, it'd still be open. The corporations offer a better experience/better prices/more choice...if you can't keep up, then back out.
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:17,
Reply)
I fucking love my local greengrocer/fishmonger/butchers/independant-supermarkets.
If they're done right, they're way better than a super market.
If I drove, I don't think i'd go to the big supermarket.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:55,
Reply)
Good.
We don't need it anymore. I'm sure he will do alright out of his 6 other shops and online business. Lovely free advertising in the mail though.
(
Peej, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:12,
Reply)
What a fucking cunt
Plus, the gayest of all job titles, even gayer than 'gay porn actor', is surely 'chocolatier'.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:13,
Reply)
I thought chocolatier was gay slang for someone who was deviantly gay.
(
Peej, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:15,
Reply)
You'd know!!!!!!!!
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:16,
Reply)
I may be a homo but I'm also a homeowner
(
Peej, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:18,
Reply)
I read this in the style of 'The Killers'
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:19,
Reply)
He can always get a job in Tesco
They sell chocolates.
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:14,
Reply)
that's all anyone in wilmslow reads
that and the torygraph
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:15,
Reply)
I don't care if the High Street dies.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:18,
Reply)
so long as your virtual second life high street is alive and well
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:19,
Reply)
Seriously, I couldn't give the slightest shit if it goes.
My prediction for the future is for increased online purchasing, large warehouses outside of towns for delivery and what used to be the High Street largely residential with pubs and cafes etc.
THe High Street is a relic.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:21,
Reply)
This is precisely where we're heading.
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:24,
Reply)
it's as depressing as fuck as well
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:28,
Reply)
No it fucking isn't.
I'll be well happy when there aren't crowds of witless spastics milling about on the street with their screaming, bratty children getting in my way.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:29,
Reply)
but why will you be on the street?
a haircut once every few weeks? a generic starbucks coffee? and?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:30,
Reply)
And what?
Lower traffic both pedestrian and vehicular, quieter town centres and a pub on the corner. Sounds perfect.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:32,
Reply)
no, it sounds dull and horrific
like a ghost town
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:35,
Reply)
your world sounds shit and i hope you're wrong and that you die in a chilli-infested ant fire
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:38,
Reply)
It depends if it gets
redeveloped in the way that the Frenchie is envisioning. I see what he is getting at in that you will have a more residential high street so they will return to the Victorian style with cafes and "service" shops and no garish chain stores.
This may not be the reality though
(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:36,
Reply)
what will happen will be that the affluent parts will revitalise
and other places will become ghost towns
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:38,
Reply)
I don't care if a bunch of Northerners and povvos spend their time drinking in third rate shit holes.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:40,
Reply)
says the man who works in uxbridge
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:41,
Reply)
Crucially, I don't live there.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:43,
Reply)
Possibly
but it could go either way. I have seen lots of plans that include the residentialiastion (made up word alert) of high streets that look very well thought out, and they are also fairly cheap, so if that's the case it could be made to work. you will then have the drip feed of artisan shops from the affluent areas.... or it could go Detroit
(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:41,
Reply)
this is britain
have you seen the average twat that lives here?
what part of the average brit makes you think that anything will ever work out well?!
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:44,
Reply)
In a positive frame...
What you are expressing is the lowest common denominator I would suggest that the "average" brit is significantly better than you suggest. Yes there are many mouth breathers but the point of them is they are more visible than the mean. They are the ones cluttering up the high street when you want to do anything so they become the vision of average.
(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:53,
Reply)
Also will put an end to "shopping" as opposed to "buying"
"shopping" being code for "wandering from shoe shop to shoe shop with all the directional sense of a fart in a colander but never actually buying anything. All. Fucking. Day."
(
localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:39,
Reply)
And good bloody riddance to it, too.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:40,
Reply)
you wait
you'll be the one who is made to box them all back up and post them back and then spend hours pissing around waiting for the online retailers to refund your money when we HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO TRY THEM ON FIRST
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:40,
Reply)
It's not our fault women's sizes are retarded.
Ours are done in inches. If you don't know what measurement your waist is, it's your own bloody problem.
Besides, plenty of women I know buy online without sending them back and I've never heard them complain about excessive delays.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:42,
Reply)
you wait
by the time you and OG have kids, and you have to buy their clothes online because mothercare went bust ages ago, and you are spending every lunchtime queuing up in whatever replaces the post office to send back little charva's babygros... you'll look back and go, fuck swipe was right
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:45,
Reply)
What it comes down to is me arguing legitimate points backed up by observable market trends
and you going "but I don't LIKE it!"
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:46,
Reply)
no, i am saying the trends point in a sad and worrying direction
i deal with closures of these shops every day; i see how many people lose jobs and how many landlords lose properties over it. it's a crying shame.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:48,
Reply)
It's nothing of the sort.
Adapt or die. That bloody chocolate shop isn't shutting down, it's still operating online. It will continue to do business online even if his other six shops close. It's not a shame, it's progress.
(
Kroney, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:52,
Reply)
Yeah, cos no-one ever buys an imperfectly fitting but exceptionally good looking shoe.
(
localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:44,
Reply)
that's a different complaint
and an entirely legitimate one.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:45,
Reply)
Besides, Next (for example) deliver to your door, and will then collect what doesn't fit.
(
localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:50,
Reply)
yup
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:25,
Reply)
Who the fuck was he paying 1300
worth of wages to a week... maybe if he was a bit more astute he wouldn't have had to shut,
(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:27,
Reply)
Is that weekly???
I thought that was per month!! Jesus Christ.
(
Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:37,
Reply)
He had a weekly breakdown
So looking at the size of that shop and assuming he was paying an average of £200 pw per staff member (semi part time hours) he had at least 6 staff in there...
(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:39,
Reply)
he's right though, it was always v v busy
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:39,
Reply)
6 members of staff busy
I doubt it?
(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:42,
Reply)
i don't think they were all on at once
he was open from breakfast to supper, 7 days a week, i think
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:45,
Reply)
then £200/week is again too much for part time work
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:51,
Reply)
YEAH...
(
Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:54,
Reply)
I suspect he had 3 Eastern Europeans on something piddling and paid himself the rest
(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 15:01,
Reply)
I agree.
He's paying far too fucking much for lots of things in his 'open letter'. It is perfectly possible to run a successful independent business, but you have to work hard keeping on top of your costs, and checking and renegotiating prices and purchasing terms almost weekly. People whine about things costing too much, but spend their time complaining rather than doing anything about it.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:41,
Reply)
YEAH, plus he's probably a fuckin bender
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:43,
Reply)
EXACTLY.
And if he's a bender, he's probably a nonce too. We know this from credible scientific research.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:44,
Reply)
Can someone start a new thread pls
(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:44,
Reply)
Done and DONE.
(
Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 1 Aug 2013, 14:48,
Reply)
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