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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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ENOUGH!
So, Cairo eh? There's a reddit thread from a guy who was out photographing it all and it sounds crazy. Police killing civilians, snipers, tanks. What's your take on it all? A fair reaction to violent protests or a government running scared?

Alt: I've been ordered to Hoover the house, tips on doing a half assed job but making it look good?

Altalt: so, I've been up to the vet again, looks like Max is quite ill, bit worried about the poor lamb, they say he'll be ok, but he looks so miserable. Got any pets? Got any dead pets?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:35, 236 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
What brand of vacuum cleaner do you own?
Because if it's not an actual Hoover....do you see where I'm going with this? LOOPHOLE.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:37, Reply)
Dyson with death, by the sound of it.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:39, Reply)
Henry Hoover.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:41, Reply)
Hmm
You could argue this one...but it's probably not worth the aggro.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:43, Reply)
I like tangos solution below.
Just scuff my feet along the pile to raise it, air freshened and back to eati crisps in my pants
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:45, Reply)
I wouldn't put them back on after that

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:47, Reply)
Emergency Contingency:
Just tell her you couldn't be arsed. Yeah, she'll be pissed, but you know...who cares. It's not like women's opinions actually matter.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:55, Reply)
ahahaha

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:07, Reply)
I'm going to have a bit of a grumble in a minute.
Stay tuned!
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:39, Reply)
OHBOYOHBOY!!

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:40, Reply)
NO IT SUPPORT CHAT

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:40, Reply)
No worries, it ent technical

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:41, Reply)
You know Nakers will be here shortly, right?
Then it'll get technical
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:44, Reply)
it will be something about how
President cheese isn't a true reflection of the range of dairy products in France
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:08, Reply)
this is nothing to do with your magazine collection is it?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:40, Reply)
This is not at all like you......




oh wait.....
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:47, Reply)
Heard it, mate.
Cunt rings up. Cunt is idiot. Cunt pisses you off.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:48, Reply)
Silly buggers should've voted in the chap they wanted in the first place.
Alt: Ensure that you raise the carpet pile, spray some air freshener in the corner of each room and leave the vacuum cleaner out.

Altalt: I've never had a pet.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:40, Reply)
The interesting thing was that it was a mix of people who voted either way,
And they were more protesting the actions of the government, than they were the result. Of course that is just one perspective, and I don't really trust reddit, but I'd really like to understand it a bit better.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:43, Reply)
As I understand it there are supporters of Morsi out protesting about his removal from power
Then there are those who may or may not support him, but think his removal by the army was something of a blow for their nascent democracy.
Then there are those who just like lobbing rocks at the police.
Oh and the army and the police are there with guns.
It's a good job the British Museum is taking care of all their ancient artefacts, otherwise they'd probably all get ruined in the kerfuffle.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:49, Reply)
You know what, say what you like about the UK government, but we are good at looking after other people's stuff.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:02, Reply)
The second round of the presidential elections were between Him and a former prime minister in mubarracks regime.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:44, Reply)
Yeah democracy has its flaws

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:50, Reply)
It's too far away to care about.
Alt: Just do the middles.

Altalt: when our cat had kittens my sisters, who were 3 and 4 at the time, were helping one of them to learn how to do somersaults, and broke it's neck.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:48, Reply)
Oh Christ really? That must have been fairly traumatic.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:58, Reply)
I do sometimes wonder how on earth they managed to maintain a reasonably believable veneer of normality
Considering what they've been through. One of them woke up in the middle of the night to find my mum and dad dissecting they guinea pig who had only just died that afternoon and she'd buried with a little funeral service.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:00, Reply)
Why were your parents dissecting a guinea pig?
What the fuck is wrong with you people?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:04, Reply)
My parents are biologists.
They're ... like that.

My dad to this day has a culture of snails that he's studying, and is getting little papers published here and there for shits n' giggles.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:09, Reply)
yeah, but it's your daughters guinea pig,
That shows a weird mental state.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:13, Reply)
To be fair, it had died suddenly and unexpectedly (prior to the dissection, I hasten to add).
And she'd been put to bed hours before.

I think they'd got on the outside of a bottle of wine and thought it would be interesting.

In fact, I know this, as they've told us that's what happened.

I think they found a cancer, although we rarely get to that bit as A We're all too busy laughing and B Anyone who hasn't heard the story is too busy staring in horror.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:14, Reply)
RIGHT grumble time.
So my department's split into two non-equal factions. The application people, who support maybe five web apps and us, who support everything else. The manager of the other department has for years relied on two key members of staff that knew all her stuff inside and out. They both left. Now it's rapidly becoming clear that she doesn't have the first idea how to support any of her apps, she's hiring staff left, right and centre in a bid to cover the gaps in her knowledge and she's failing. Net result is she's coming over here in a fluster and asking us lots of questions about how her stuff works.

Conclusion: I don't know and her constant panicking is a) mildly inconveniencing me and b) mildly irritating.

Fuck Egypt, can we please focus on some REAL problems?

God, it's good to get that off my chest.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:49, Reply)
Tell her you don't know
Problem solved
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:51, Reply)
Mate, if I was going to be anything other than passive-aggressive about it
I wouldn't have bothered posting on the internet about it.

Come on, man. You're a clever guy, have a word with yourself, yeah?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:52, Reply)
^ upset ^

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:00, Reply)
"non-equal factions"?
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:53, Reply)
can't you get her job?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:54, Reply)
Can't you just tell whoever the boss is that she's a useless shit bag and deserves to go join the ever increasing Dole queue?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:59, Reply)
Been there for years
she's got the protection of professional inertia. She'll have to fuck up big-style before she gets binned.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:04, Reply)
Well, just passive aggressively refuse to help.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:04, Reply)
Can't you just sit in the toilet and cry?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:04, Reply)
You know what Frog,
Your positive get up and go attitude is a breath of fresh air here on the board.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:05, Reply)
HA! Cheers. I'm actually in a GOOD mood today.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:06, Reply)
What do you think he's been doing all week?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:09, Reply)
wanking while staring at a blurry photo of you?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:13, Reply)
I don't know why all photos of me come out like that

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:17, Reply)
Haha I love The IT Crowd!

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:05, Reply)
Alt: Do it properly.
You will then have the satisfaction of a job well done.

Altalt: That's not nice. Get well, Max.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:50, Reply)
I don't get why people think "clearing" these places will end any other way.
If you can't stand people having a sit in then just surround them for a week, stop anyone going in with food/water but let anyone leave.

Don't know if that's allowed though.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:51, Reply)
Alright Chompy?
Did you make it up with the missus or has she run off to stay with Big Tony, the rough-looking, crag-faced doorman with a heart of gold that was always there for her whenever a customer got a bit "handsy"?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:54, Reply)
If you trap an animal it tends to fight to get out.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:01, Reply)
Racist.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:03, Reply)
that's true, but if you give them enough room, then they'd have to leave where they're protesting to get to you.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:04, Reply)
I read a long time ago that Sharm el-Sheikh is about the only safe place to visit in Eygpt
and advised that if you had to change planes in Cairo not to leave the airport and that was before all this shit kicked off.

Alt: It's only a bit of hovering, just do a great job she may reward you*

Alt:alt: I may not have mentioned it but I got given a Turtle on fathers day.

*nudge nudge wink wink
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:57, Reply)
Is it still alive?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:00, Reply)
Its turtley dead, dude

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:01, Reply)
Did you eat it?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:02, Reply)
If it died I may have to shell out for another one

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:02, Reply)
I heard it is being trained up to replace you as husband and father of the hare household

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:07, Reply)
He has actually really grown on me
now he has a deep water tank with a basking area he really has come out of his shell* he's a rapid little bugger when you put live food in the tank.

*no pun intended
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:14, Reply)
Just slowly biding its time
then when double H takes a sneaky nap beneath a tree he will cruise past in into the arms of his beloved
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:15, Reply)
very good

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:20, Reply)
Thanks Nakers
I was quite pleased with it...
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:29, Reply)
If he died I may Cry(ptodira).

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:05, Reply)
sounds like you want to break free of this chore

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 9:58, Reply)
Very good

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:00, Reply)
ITBOH

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:06, Reply)
Is this an acronym or a spelling mistake?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:12, Reply)
I thinks he's making both fun of your Career and calling you a child

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:15, Reply)
In The Buttock Orgasm Hole

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:16, Reply)
If it stood for that I'm sure he would be milking it more

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:21, Reply)
I'm the best one here

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:23, Reply)
+a
e
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:39, Reply)
Ragheads gonna rag.
The sooner the whole lot of them wipe each other out the better.

Fucking wankers.

Altalt: go to the pub, and just pretend you did it

Altaltalt: loads, what're you after?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:06, Reply)
Plus, smelly food.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:07, Reply)
^ this guy gets it

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:10, Reply)
I can't go to the pub,
I've gotta drive later.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:10, Reply)
Bah.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:10, Reply)
I might just drive pissed

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:11, Reply)
Yeah fuck it
What's the worst that could happen?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:13, Reply)
*mowingdownbusstopsofholidayingkidslols*

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:23, Reply)
You don't have to drink to have a good time.....
yes you do
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:11, Reply)
Or take your clothes off. Oh, no.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:12, Reply)
Blah blah cherry wine (non-alcoholic)...

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:13, Reply)
Oh. Right.
*dresses*
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:20, Reply)
Oh man. Ignored.
That'll teach me to show any heartfelt concern for my fellow man :(
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:07, Reply)
Eh?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:09, Reply)
butthurt

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:10, Reply)
Chompy has ignored me for asking him how things are.
I'm guessing not good and he's lashing out with the violence only a broken heart can give you.

Poor man.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:10, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2049999
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:12, Reply)
Another victim of Misery's itchy 2.0 finger, eh?
Edit: Oh off topic politics, not qotw
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:09, Reply)
If he didn't want us to ask about it, he should never have mentioned it.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:11, Reply)
like those people on facebook who post
"soooooooo upset right now, but can't talk about it"
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:15, Reply)
If I was him,
I'd 2.0 myself.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:17, Reply)
genuinely, it was a bit of a weird thing to do, given that she apparently wastes her life reading OT so was going to see his post and people's comments
but autists gonna aut
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:21, Reply)
I spent a lot of time thinking up that Big Tony post.
I'm a bit annoyed that I'll have to log out to have a look at my own wit, now. Pretty inconsiderate of him.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:23, Reply)
he'll take you off again soon enough

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:24, Reply)
It was very good
Reminded me of Marv in Sin City
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:25, Reply)
Does she read it?
Why doesn't she post?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:23, Reply)
Because she doesnt exist?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:25, Reply)
no idea
i've only got that from his blooo-blooooo-ing about how she got upset by what people put on here. given the two options of (i) him lying to try and shut people up or (ii) her bothering to read through all these pages of drivel, i suspect the former is far, far more likely.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:27, Reply)
Seems she only looks when Chompy points out to her that somebody's being mean about her
which he doesn't like because seeing what people post about her upsets her and he wants to protect her from it, or something.

I don't know, the rationale isn't totally clear to me.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:29, Reply)
Particularly in light of the fact
that she's no shrinking violet...she's taken all sorts of abuse from Balmonkey over the years, and taken it with good humour.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:34, Reply)
either she is weird by reading stuff that she isn't involved with, or he is telling lies about her reading it
i know where my money is
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:37, Reply)
You're saying someone might lie about their girlfriend for imaginary Internet attention?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:39, Reply)
yes of course
but here, i think the opposite. "this cunning plan will stop people saying bad things about me."
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:42, Reply)
What an idiot.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:45, Reply)
hell yes

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 11:00, Reply)
I just think that if someone on here said something that ACTUALLY upset her
She'd let them know, right?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:50, Reply)
i don't believe for one split second that she bothers to read it
but even if i'm wrong, i don't believe that she can't see through it, ie people having a poke at psycho, and nothing to do with her. because he certainly is quick to have a poke at everyone else.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 11:00, Reply)
This is the most blatant case of dishing it out
but being unable to take it that I've seen on here.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 11:06, Reply)
his greasy sausage fists will be mashing that "log out" button HARD

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 11:13, Reply)

i just hope for her sake that they didn't have make-up sex*. she'll be wincing in agony every time she goes for a piss for the next 3 days.



*you may have seen similar techniques on history programmes, with people using battering rams on castle gates
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:10, Reply)
You are the one who raised her ginger portcullis to him!

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:12, Reply)
I AM NOT GINGER
don't become the victim of my first ever 2.0, man
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:13, Reply)
lol

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:14, Reply)
Oh I don't know.
I think he'd look smashing with a bit of lippy on.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:13, Reply)
like jo brand?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:14, Reply)
No, I really don't

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:21, Reply)
i don't think anybody does

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:22, Reply)
You'd know

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:15, Reply)
Ha
Oh dear. He is a sensitive soul, isn't he.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:22, Reply)
Next time he pops us, I'm going to ask him how he is.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:23, Reply)
Well if he didn't want support, he wouldn't have mentioned it, right?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:28, Reply)
You wouldn't have been around when I broke up with my ex
but he was pretty cruel over it. One little tickle of his own medicine and he's all blooblooignore.

I don't know, Twoey, I've never been ignored to my knowledge before. Except with Q's grand experiment, obviously. I don't understand anything anymore. My world's turned upside down.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:25, Reply)
I can believe it

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:29, Reply)
Please explain, has Chompy been dumped?

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:24, Reply)
He tried to introduce The Cleveland Steamer
into his repertoire of foreplay and things weren't as well received as he would have hoped
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:26, Reply)
Poor guy.
I hope he didn't get his sheets messy.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:27, Reply)
Currently unclear.
He made a couple of posts about having ruined everything and how he's going to go for a smoke in the woods in an attempt to man up. Since then radio silence. I'm worried about him, Al. He sounds like he might go and stand out in the rain at any moment.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:27, Reply)
Oh no. I hope he doesn't throw his head back and shout "WHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
So that the falling raindrop mingle with the tears rolling down his cheeks and he feels like his life has become a cure song.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:29, Reply)
He's liable to fall to his knees into a muddy puddle at any minute, Al.
I hope he has somebody to pick him up and take him to a titty bar to get over it.

Oh, actually, that's probably not the best place. Maybe go-karting?
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:34, Reply)
He totally needs to visit
thischarmingcharlie.tumblr.com
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:42, Reply)
LOL!

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:30, Reply)
In his pants, holding a white Dove
Time to....
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:30, Reply)
It's interesting.
I, for one,am quite surprised to see that Egypt is fielding tanks as new and shiny as the M1 Abrams. Also good to see some more venerable Pattons on the streets, if you're a fan of classic US tanks. Myself I was hoping to see some vintage Soviet hardware as these are my favourite. On the upside I did pop by to see the Mandella Way T34 on my way home last night, which was nice as it's probab;y one of my favourite tanks of ever.

Alt:Just do a good job, stop slacking.

AltAlt: no pets these days, can't see the point and I don't, realistically have the time for them. I have had many pets which are now dead, mostly gerbils, nothing interesting there, rodents make dull pets, although, having said that, I might have a rat one day.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:35, Reply)
There has been no disruption to the USD1.3bn of military aid from the US.
Tanks ahoy!

Cheers.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:39, Reply)
Yes, that makes sense.
In my head middle east = old soviet tanks, I was forgetting Egypt was one of the 'good' guys.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 11:12, Reply)
I was planning to see that T34 next month during the waqqi Monopoly pub crawl I'm doing
as it's just off Old Kent Road
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:41, Reply)
You can actually go into the waste ground and climb on it now, if you want.
The current paint job isn't stellar, but it's worth a look.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 11:11, Reply)
All my pets are now dead.
With the exception of the vampire cat I had with my ex, which I assume is still disembowelling small field creatures with aplomb.
(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:39, Reply)
NO FRUIT WOES CHAT

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:42, Reply)
very good.

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:43, Reply)
NEW THREAD

(, Thu 15 Aug 2013, 10:52, Reply)

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