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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Well well well
It's Freitag. I have today off from the glamorous world of retail financial advice because I am chief usher at a wedding. The weather is shit, but I don't care. That's how fucking rock n' roll I am.

What does Friday hold for you? A toothless gam from a paki tramp? A free pizza? Perhaps a series of sexts from an old flame?

Do tell, but try and make it interesting, yeah?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 7:48, 209 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
If you want interesting you'll have to wait for AA to post

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 7:52, Reply)
this is true
That man is a motherfucking raconteur yo.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 7:56, Reply)
Is he not asleep this month?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:24, Reply)
Hiding from the bailiffs

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:28, Reply)
G'day Cobblers.
Three surveys and reports to do.
Grandcub No.2 coming over for tea and silliness.
Should be a good day and the rain's not here yet.

I been to Red Indian weddings but I never seen anyone usher the chiefs.
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:03, Reply)
Morning you pack of feckless cunts
I decided this morning that I would be a rubbish gayer, sometimes when I brush my teeth I end up spewing from a tiny bit of toothpaste hitting the back of my throat.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:03, Reply)
None of my gay buddies cum toothpaste
so you may be OK.
Ta for the info yesterday, I had to go out.
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:08, Reply)
Ah phew... hook a brother up then
nothing ventured an all that.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:22, Reply)
Morning Spastics
I got up late for work, look a mess, but am glad it's Friday and therefore payday.
Today I'm going to 'chillax', have some 'me time', think about having a 'staycation', avoid 'buzzkill', see what I can get at 'freemium rates' due to 'overleveraging', 'tweet up' with my friends, and develop my 'soft skills' here. And look for more 'bullshit phrases' on 'the internet'.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:14, Reply)
Fucking hell
Do you go to the same meetings I do?
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:21, Reply)
I would end up cunting someone in the punch if they used that kind of talk

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:23, Reply)
Our SMT fucking love that kind of chatter
Bullshit bingo time
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:23, Reply)
In that situation my patience wears very thin very fast
This should give you the idea of how I deal with that kind of crap
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1673108
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:33, Reply)
I bet you say 'gibbon off, you twatting shit-chimp'!!!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:54, Reply)
O-o
Look watch it....just watch yeah, I'm not in the fucking mood
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:56, Reply)
^ typical flange-marmoset

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:56, Reply)
Hey after watching the "Jingling Baby" video I got caught in a loop of LL videos

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:03, Reply)
I do hope you didn't end up in an 'I Need Love' cul-de-sac.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:11, Reply)
I forgot how good "Jack the ripper" is

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:15, Reply)
Stop being such a cloppering wee-wee tapir, he doesn't like it.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:03, Reply)
Oh HO! Sounds like *someone* has been reading the FAQ swearing instructions!!!
Aha, what a cunting fuck-lemur!!!!!!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:53, Reply)
Sounds probable.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:24, Reply)
STRATEGISE
UPSELL
USP
KEY POINTS
FUCK OFF
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:25, Reply)
I just suggested someone 'ascertain the situation as it presents itself in the perspective'
and was taken seriously.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:26, Reply)
You also need to tell them to "drill down for more granularity".

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:35, Reply)
Not one of our meetings
there's no mention of "going forward", which crops up in every single senior managers missive. Since we haven't invented time travel there is no other way to go, you wankers.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:26, Reply)
No time travel?
So you decided to 'Sunset' that project? I'll see what I can come up with by 'The end of play' today.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:29, Reply)
I label you "negative" and "not a team player"
If you don't start "leveraging some synergies" PDQ you're going to find yourself in the "descending flightpath of headcount".
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:34, Reply)
Oh christ!

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:38, Reply)
Friday holds a day of upgrading Manc sites from my dining room
Ferrying the kids to and from school/nursery, a haircut and a run tonight

I did have a massive bonfire in the garden last night though and pizza (not free). I had NO texts
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:23, Reply)
Not even the one from me?
Man I stretched that image too
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:24, Reply)
*checks phone again*
*faints*
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:24, Reply)
*prouds*

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:27, Reply)
I had ONE text.....
From Three gently reminding me my bill was due :(
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:25, Reply)
I got a text from Mrs Hats last night saying she'd already left the shop and didn't get my request for a Kit Kat chunky in time
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:35, Reply)
I hope you punched her up the bloody throat for that.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:37, Reply)
And just before I left I stepped on her neck
And I said "Forget THAT, you prick"
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:47, Reply)
YEAH! That'll learn her.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:48, Reply)

the shop and didn't get my request for a Kit Kat chunky in time me due to my infidelities
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:53, Reply)
You saw through my subtle subtext

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:57, Reply)

ubtex expes
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:15, Reply)
My mission today is simply to survive it, having stayed up very very late getting langered with internet spazmoes.
I've got my delightful child staying over tonight and have an equally charming internet person coming round too. Tomorrow I may take my little'un to the Horniman Museum tomorrow as it is a splendid museum for children.

I had two texts at about 2 this morning from my guests from last night. One saying 'I didn't die' and the other saying 'I don't have the money for my cab', horribly misspelt.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:28, Reply)
A brave man tells the internet he's taking a child to the 'Horniman' museum
Morning Montlepiece.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:31, Reply)
I am that brave man, Hattie Jacques.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:49, Reply)
Watched the Robocop trailer
My first reaction (months ago) was IT'LL BE SHIT LIKE ALL REMAKES!!! But the cast is awesome....so who knows.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:33, Reply)

www.imdb.com/title/tt1234721/?ref_=sr_1
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:34, Reply)
I saw it too.
I agree.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:42, Reply)
I might actually watch it
And when I say "watch" I of course mean "illegally download"
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:47, Reply)
I might 'illegally download' Star Trek into darkness

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:49, Reply)
I did last weekend
got quite a good copy
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:53, Reply)
I acquired that only this morning
Might watch it tonight. Oh yeah, it's a rollercoaster here, I tell you.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:58, Reply)
I might pay someone with a sexy voice to watch it illegally,
Then describe it to me while feeding me slices of satsuma
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:50, Reply)
satsumas eh? Is that how you keep your coat so glossy?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:52, Reply)
I'm kinda busy I'm afraid.
Also satumas are out of season.


I'm saying no, basically.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:57, Reply)
Clementines?

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:01, Reply)
It has to be locally sourced and seasonal or I'm just not interested.
Rhubarb or GTFO.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:11, Reply)
Shoreditch has changed you man

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:16, Reply)
But neither of you live anywhere near the Rhubarb Triangle.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:16, Reply)
'the Rhubarb Triangle.'
Isn't that just another name for Swipey's minge?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:25, Reply)
Listen mate no one wants to hear your disgusting nicknames for your wife's fanny OK?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:26, Reply)
^Which magazine subscriber^

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:36, Reply)
Yo Nakers
How is "Day One" going?
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:42, Reply)
eh?
I'm still in my old job...I was hoping to quit today, but not sure I'll be able to see my boss. Then I might be in gardening leave for a bit
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:49, Reply)
NOW YOU OWN IT QUITPANTS

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:53, Reply)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:16, Reply)
I thought you started the new one today?
I'm sure you posted that yesterday
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:54, Reply)
I was offered it, I have the contract etc just not quit the old one yet
I'm hardlyt gonna be on here on my first day
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:57, Reply)
make sure to drop a log on the boss's desk on your last day, eh?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:58, Reply)
^Fan Death Believer^

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:39, Reply)
Don't start yhat again. Glove wearer.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:45, Reply)
That's my one for the day.
Ok, morning.
No, until 9.
Alright 8.55
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:47, Reply)
Oh man I *love* The Monkees.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:50, Reply)
I know Davy Jones daughter
of course he's dead now so...
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:51, Reply)
He won't be needing his locker any more then eh.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:55, Reply)
NOW HE OWNS IT IN FEBURARY 2012

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:56, Reply)

Cheer up, Sleepy Dozer,
Oh, what can it mean,
To a fan death believer believer,
And b3ta's spastic queen.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:52, Reply)
so are you going to tell us about your break up today?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:53, Reply)
no

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:54, Reply)
ahhh gowan
we'll be nice
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:54, Reply)
I won't.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:55, Reply)
No you won't. Especially you.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:55, Reply)
i'm lovely, ask anyone

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:56, Reply)
you're dreamy xx

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:56, Reply)
^Bit gay.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:58, Reply)
^ clinically depressed and lonely.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:01, Reply)
^astute^

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:03, Reply)
yer innit

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:04, Reply)
None of your business

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:41, Reply)
^train spotter^

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:44, Reply)
alright geezers

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:50, Reply)
Alright Dozer.
You started the longest evening thread probably ever last night. Feel proud man.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:58, Reply)
it descended into comedy insults, right?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:59, Reply)
it was proper funny

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:00, Reply)
my threads are very much underrated.
I proper zinged Battered as well. It gave me a glimmer of hope in an otherwise bleak and suffering life.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:03, Reply)
Did you? I must have missed that.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:14, Reply)
quite a lot of things go over your head.
BECAUSE YOU ARE A MIDGET!!!!!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:15, Reply)
Taller than you hamster arse.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:17, Reply)
it was your thread, but lkets be honest
I started the bear pookie insult sub thread
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:17, Reply)
It' made 2 populars.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:23, Reply)
Work, then home, put kids to bed, read a book then go to bed. Will probably drink a couple of bottles of wine
I'm living the dream here.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:56, Reply)
a couple of bottles eh?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:57, Reply)
I'm just that cool and hard
oh and street, I'm street too.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:33, Reply)
Mornin' all
Today will mostly be taken up with finishing a complex quote/offer involving machinery, tax issues and delivery to the Isle of Man. There may very well be a liquid lunch thrown in for good measure. It has rained like a bastard here. More news as it happens, now let's go over to Tom with the sports..........
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:58, Reply)
I'd need a liquid lunch if I etc

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:01, Reply)
Probably just type shite into the internet for a few hours, then slope off around three-ish.
Normal Friday really.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:58, Reply)
Ditto for everyone

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 8:59, Reply)
alright Placid
Fuck off back to twang club, eh?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:00, Reply)
I'm going to meet a rescue dog that I want to adopt.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:01, Reply)
If that's real, that's a *nice* thing.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:01, Reply)
This is Bobby here, he meets lonely dogs and then fucks them to death, it's not nice at all.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:02, Reply)
Friends with Jeff?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:02, Reply)
poor old BGB :(

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:03, Reply)
Bit below the belt :(
Edit, behind the collar.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:08, Reply)
Yeah I know I felt bad writing it, I liked BGB.
But what are you gonna do eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:12, Reply)
FUCK HER TO DEATH

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:13, Reply)
Finger pie.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:14, Reply)

www.bathcatsanddogshome.org.uk/rehoming/dogs/ruby/942/
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:05, Reply)
Would.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:09, Reply)
Ha, I'm excited

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:12, Reply)
I've banged worse.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:13, Reply)
its not very good at
camouflage though, the gooks would spot her in an instant
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:17, Reply)
Does one 'meet' a dog?
That sounds a bit odd.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:01, Reply)
He means "eat"

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:02, Reply)
Or number 26 as he likes to call it.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:04, Reply)
101 ways to wok your dog

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:18, Reply)
Specialist websites.
'Meet local bitches in your area!'
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:02, Reply)
Well this particular dog requires several visits before you can take her home. She's gorgeous though.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:05, Reply)
Nice tits, yeah?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:06, Reply)
Big fuck off furry knockers

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:07, Reply)
Hawt.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:11, Reply)
POTD

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:14, Reply)
Like when you become a regular with your favourite prostitute, and then realise you're in love?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:07, Reply)
And have got the Polack love measles.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:10, Reply)
Before smashing her brains in with a can of beans because she won't stop
Turning tricks when all you want is to get her off the streets and she doesn't understand how right you are for each other...
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:11, Reply)
We've all been there, eh

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:14, Reply)
Who amongst us could judge a man for such actions?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:18, Reply)
I have made it into work on time.
I believe in miracles, Where're you from, you sexy thing, you sexy thang you
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:04, Reply)
Aberdeen, but I live in York.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:04, Reply)
I didn't realise you were a sweaty.
No wonder no one wants to go for a drink with you.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:05, Reply)
YEAH

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:06, Reply)
abody kens thit us jocks ur the best fir drinking wi', eh?
Nae like you fucken Southern kike wankers.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:07, Reply)
Something about kilts?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:09, Reply)
He tries to disguise his Scotch accent when he meets people.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:10, Reply)
By throwing McEwans down his neck?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:11, Reply)
no.
I'm very well spoken.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:12, Reply)

very
spoken bent
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:15, Reply)
Did you do a runner from your cab, your gouty leg flapping in the breeze like a pus-filled windsock?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:05, Reply)
Yes. Only there was no breeze.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:08, Reply)
I'm from that space in your heart,
And one day I will return to you and we will be completed.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:08, Reply)
Now you're lying close to me, making love to me.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:09, Reply)
I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES!
Earworm.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:11, Reply)
Since you came along, you sexy thing

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:12, Reply)
*background sings*
You sexy thing, you sexy thing you.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:15, Reply)
*performs degrading strip routine in a northern working men's club*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:16, Reply)
*slips a fiver with my phone number in your bum cleavage*

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:17, Reply)
"do you like my thong? it's vulcanised rubber"

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:18, Reply)
I fucking love Star Trek.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:19, Reply)
^ actually does

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:20, Reply)
I thought you said he was alright.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:22, Reply)
I lied.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:24, Reply)
The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:28, Reply)
Good news.
The many would like you to hop it, so go on, do one.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:34, Reply)
/footjoke

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:35, Reply)
Sad.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:24, Reply)
+ship enterprise

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:29, Reply)
+bubbleship matey.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:30, Reply)
'I've got two....traffic cones'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:20, Reply)
Same title better track
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2053206
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:26, Reply)
I have micro this morning. I shall be taking her to the soft play place due to the rain. This will be chaos and tiring.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:12, Reply)
That's fascinating.
Tell us more.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:13, Reply)
Piss off you sarky one footed oaf.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:14, Reply)
No, really.
Please describe in the minutest of detail. Make it real for those of us who couldn't give half a shit.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:18, Reply)
Afterwards I shall be obtaining a sniper rifle and killing as many dickheads in the insurance industry as possible.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:19, Reply)
Send more ammo.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:22, Reply)
I've got plenty. I know how many of you cunts there are.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:23, Reply)
take ear plugs

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:15, Reply)
Good plan

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:15, Reply)
Aren't 'chaos' and 'tiring' PJ's kids?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:17, Reply)
Watch him wreck the mic.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:18, Reply)
No, there was another kid called Chaos who was going to sue so we had to rename her Ultimate Kaos

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:34, Reply)
If anyone gets this reference they are very sad indeed.

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:38, Reply)
I did that yesterday and had to ring a customer

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:20, Reply)
Not a good combination.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:21, Reply)
I had to apologise to her midway through as Calf 2 was bellowing at the top of the slide

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:22, Reply)

that yesterday and had to ring a customer a golden retriever up the poopchute, not ten minutes ago
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:22, Reply)
That Blue Peter dog really is bonny

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:23, Reply)
Punch her in the throat.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:21, Reply)
sexy punch

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:23, Reply)
You are a monster.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:26, Reply)
sexy monster

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:30, Reply)

ster ty

You love him and are Gay for his bum bum.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:33, Reply)
He's only human.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:33, Reply)
When we stayed at yours,
I stood and watched you sleep. You're a handsome sleeper.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:36, Reply)
I imagine his hair fans out over the pillow like a mermaid's

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:37, Reply)
+ as I cum all over it

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:40, Reply)

hair fans out over the pillow like a mermaids genitals while rubbing myself
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:41, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2075788
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:42, Reply)
hahahahahaha.
I've done that.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:37, Reply)
yeah me too

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:39, Reply)
I imagine you dressing up as
Angus Young prior to going so you can sneak onto the bouncy castle
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:21, Reply)
You
bounced me allllll niiiiiiight long
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:22, Reply)
Ha ha

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:22, Reply)
Then he was chunder-struck

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:24, Reply)

The earth was quakin'
My mind was achin'
And we were makin' it and you -
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:25, Reply)

sneak onto the bouncy castle get into the cinema half price
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:23, Reply)

half price under the booth
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:24, Reply)

under the booth hidden in a bucket of popcorn
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:27, Reply)
+funsize

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:27, Reply)
^Battered's new sig^

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:28, Reply)

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