Great news!!
www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2515485/Dappy-hospitalized-kicked-face-horse.html

I don't endorse the Daily Heil but had to see if they were being racist about the horses colour.
Who do you want to get kicked in the face by a horse and why?

alt. Best/Worst ways to die.

altalt. What are you all doing? Not posting on here, that's for sure!!!

Get fucked.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 12:54, 122 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

you.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 12:57, Reply)

Cheer up sonna.
Might never happen, eh?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 12:58, Reply)

Schadenfreude, Jason.
I don't want anyone to be kicked in the face by a horse.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:03, Reply)

What a good lad you are.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:09, Reply)

I'd like to see Sandi Toksvig kicked to death. Doesn't need to be by a horse. Any mammal will suffice.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:17, Reply)

I like Sandi Toksvig.

( Kroney, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:19, Reply)

There is something sinister about her. I dislike her almost as much as you dislike moths.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:25, Reply)

Is it because she is so much taller than you?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:27, Reply)

She is exceptionally odd.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:30, Reply)

No. 73 was good though

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:31, Reply)

ITV? Wasn't allowed to watch that. Common apparently.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:35, Reply)

That Blurred Lines song right, it's getting all this publicity about it being rapey
but I reckon it's got an excellent base line and I like it.

Maybe rapists would be more popular if they all had funky baselines.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:17, Reply)

That bit when he goes "what rhymes with hug me" has its own website where people guess what rhymes with it
Someone put something like:

Go ahead and drug me
If you get sleepy
I won't get creepy
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:21, Reply)

Isn't it the video that people are upset about?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:24, Reply)

Yeah. That's right, a number of student unions have baaned the song being played on radio because of the video.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:26, Reply)

Well the BBC banned two Frankie Goes To Hollywood songs because of the videos, so it isn't beyond the realms of possibility.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:29, Reply)

I thought that Relax was due to Simon Bates being offened by the line
"when you want to suck to it"
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:33, Reply)

Mike Read, wasn't it?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:35, Reply)

Could well have been to be honest
was just going from memory and Bates was the first DJ I got to...


A quick google confirms you are correct, have 3 internet points
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:36, Reply)

YES!!! IN YOUR FACE!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:39, Reply)

Plasterers radio lols

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:40, Reply)

He is a MARRIED MAN
and it is MORALLY WRONG.

Song's a bit shit too. No idea why it caught fire.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:25, Reply)

But the video has saucy ladies with boobs in it

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:28, Reply)

They all do these days. Whores of Babylon.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:30, Reply)

Girl comes into the pub with half her tits showing, I look at them, I'm the pervert...

I walk into the pub with half my cock showing...Girl looks at it...I'm still the pervert!?
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:34, Reply)

Double standards, man.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:36, Reply)

Regardless of the joke, and if we had a proper lawyer on here they could confirm
This could be apocryphal, but there was a tale of an example of how this works:
If a bloke looks out of his window and sees a lady sunbathing naked in her garden next door he could be done as a peeping tom,
however if the reverse happens he could be done for indecent exposure.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:39, Reply)

pressing charges will also depend on how fit he is.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:41, Reply)

On the plus side we get paid more and promoted ahead of them, so swings and roundabouts...

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:41, Reply)

Don't have to endure childbirth, car insurance is cheaper, don't bleed every month etc.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:43, Reply)

Car insurance isnt cheaper for men

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:44, Reply)

It is for me v my ex, by about £500.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:45, Reply)

*Boring man who used to work in insurance alert*
Historically women (on a like for like basis) would get far cheaper insurance as they would have fewer serious accidents and drive less in general so reducing the risk. But I believe that recently there was a kick off about it so the eliminated that as part of the risk assesment
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:52, Reply)

the EU Gender Directive in December 2012
Equalised insurance ratings and annuity rates for men and women, in spite of underwriting criteria favouring women in insurance and men in annuity rates, this being due to the difference in mortality and morbidity between men and women.

HTH xx
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:32, Reply)

Sheila's Wheels

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:48, Reply)

Ah man those dozy tarts could do with a good killing

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:53, Reply)

Oh I know
I am being sexist in an attempt at humour
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:44, Reply)

I'm not a criminal lawyer
But I think the lack of equal pay for men and women and the lack of women in boardrooms is the better example...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:42, Reply)

lawyer Obvious strikethrough is obvious...
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:43, Reply)

Isn't that just because you're all a bit shit?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:45, Reply)

Shit like an independent scotland

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:46, Reply)

I'm not sure where you're going with this, but do continue...

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:52, Reply)

Well nowhere really
Just like Scotland
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:53, Reply)

the list for an independant scotland read like
someone who divorces their wife but wants to go back round each night for an evening meal and a shag
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:55, Reply)

Pretty accurate.
Alex Salmond is a fat, clueless, brainless, spastic. He should post on here.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:56, Reply)

He does. Goes by the name of Al.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:57, Reply)

That explains a lot.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:58, Reply)

I like this and have done the correct thing

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:59, Reply)

Im tweeting this.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:09, Reply)

Well as Scotland is a country then it's not physically going anywhere at all, so you're right on that score. Well done.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:55, Reply)

I am surprised he hasn't suggested a physical detachment and floating off elsewhere
It's about as realistic as some of his other shite
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:59, Reply)

You're missing a fundamental point here.
While Scotland is still physically attached to England he can still blame "they bastard English" for anything and everything that goes wrong, and yet still be able to nip next door to borrow a cup of sugar.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:14, Reply)

I just wanted yoU to bite at my shortbread
Ah well :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:16, Reply)

Is that a euphemism? You could have just asked.
Or a titgaz. That usually works.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:25, Reply)

That's so misandric.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:54, Reply)

Bob crow could only benefit from a good horse kicking
See also Vanessa feltz and Kerry katona, the latter bankrupt tramp is about to shit out her 5th disgusting piece of crotchfruit, so maybe kick her in the gunt.

Alt: my mate's grandma fell asleep aged 85 with all her faculties and a glass of wine in her hand and never woke up again. That has to be the best way. Worst? Systematic torture then being burned alive like that former slave in texas. Shudder.

Altalt: boring admin stuff.

Thanks!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:24, Reply)

Yes. Any of those ITV2 endorsed fucktards would get it in the face.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:26, Reply)

I also have a loathing for Richard and judy

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:38, Reply)

They went to channel 4 didn't they?

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:39, Reply)

loathing wide on
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:41, Reply)

Hello gayjay.
I can think of Several people needing a horse kicking but I'm not going to tell you.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:35, Reply)

Does one of them wear a shit hat?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:36, Reply)

Yes.
Yes she does.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:47, Reply)

Clickin dis

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:36, Reply)

Hello

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:46, Reply)

*waves*
You came to save /OT?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:48, Reply)

No

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:51, Reply)

Hello Frogcock.
I'm dog sitting today. He's big and evil looking.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:51, Reply)

Put a cap on its head. Guaranteed to make any wearer look like a pussy.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:52, Reply)

well get off him then

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:53, Reply)

He LAAAAAARVS it.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:00, Reply)

Stupid Royal Mail have lost a t-shirt I ordered.
No wonder they are getting shafted.
It's been at the Truro office for ten days. I don't even...

Getting a refund though and the company says I can keep it if it comes.
I may now get onto Royal Mail and be a true winner.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 13:50, Reply)

I've never in all my days seen anyone work so slowly before as when I visit that place. I mean, it's like actual slow motion.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:04, Reply)

The sorting office round mine always has a queue out the door for undelivered items.
It's a painful process going to collect.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:08, Reply)

Bye

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:05, Reply)

No, just curious

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:08, Reply)

very good

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:38, Reply)

I have a mate who once got kicked over a wall by a donkey
Proper shoe prints on his chest

I'd like to see Kate Bush smashed in the face by a horse, yes

I've been to the pub, all is good now
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:11, Reply)

Im finally on my dinner after butty bitch did a no show.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:13, Reply)

I decided that 6 pints of Peroni was better than food
I stand by this
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:14, Reply)

6 for lunch? That would put Stunned to shame.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:23, Reply)

well he has done his northern running thing now
so he might as well go for the monopod look and aim for the 2016 special Olympics
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:25, Reply)

I'm gonna roll me a gold medal

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:32, Reply)

Re your earlier comment who wouldn't let you watch ITV?

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:26, Reply)

My parents.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:28, Reply)

Done and done

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:31, Reply)

I assume you don't drive to & from work?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:33, Reply)

Not today, no
Metro baby
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:35, Reply)

hrrrrrrrnnnnnkkk
Stand clear of the doors please
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:41, Reply)

Indeed this
via the "joy" of the Meadow Well and North Shields too
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:42, Reply)

I lived in Meadowell for a month or so.
The only place where I've never felt safe in my own home.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:00, Reply)

During the Geordiepocalypse I got chucked off the Metro there in th PISSING rain
I nearly drowned getting to North Shields
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:07, Reply)

Sounds like some sort of toon army?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:09, Reply)

It was a Toon Army riot.
Whole housing estate went apeshit.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:10, Reply)

Earned the name MeadowHell

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:10, Reply)

The "army" epithet annoys me.
Toon Army, Barmy Army etc.

You're not an army, you're a mob. A mob of drunk oiks.
( Kroney, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:15, Reply)

This is because you're French. Your lot have never liked being in the military.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:16, Reply)

Theirs is the "retreating army"

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:20, Reply)

Hands up for the French!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:21, Reply)

Prior to Keegan in 1992 there was no such thing as the "Toon" or the "Toon Army"
It seemed to appear then, much to my annoyance
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:21, Reply)

I blame them for summoning the vast amount
of devastating tidal waves we have had recently
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:35, Reply)

Don't drag me into that.
I have nothing but faultless manners and etiquette.

Now fuck of and die, you white flag waving, snail eating poof.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:21, Reply)

No, the proper mental rain we had last year

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:14, Reply)

Serving pulled pork realness.
Worth the wait.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:32, Reply)

I like Kate's Bush.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:14, Reply)

I bet its like a 70's Keegan

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:38, Reply)

the balls would skid off it after a weak attempt of a flick header?

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:46, Reply)

Mine did

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:50, Reply)

there are only about 4 people here who would have got this reference
Now where is my baseball bat?
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 14:55, Reply)

Think YM's lost it in her minge again

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:07, Reply)

Its a Range Rover lol from me, boss

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:07, Reply)

alright

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 29 Nov 2013, 15:33, Reply)