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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Well those seem dead unfortunately, Lic's looked ok though.
Weekend plans? I'm soft play milfing today, then, weather dependent, off camping \0/Not been for ages, really looking forward to it. What do you like about the countryside? Anything?
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 8:23, 129 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
you're second only to agnostic antichrist

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 8:24, Reply)
A compliment!
I'll try harder with 'alright' for my next thread.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 8:32, Reply)
I don't think you appreciate the Pynchonesque intricacies of my gnomic pronouncements.
Alright.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 8:39, Reply)
^Bought a thesaurus^

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 8:44, Reply)
I love how your own lexical deficiencies lead you to think that everyone else is as thick as you are

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 8:45, Reply)
I know I am!

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:41, Reply)
Morning GJ.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:44, Reply)
Yerr, thought I was on to a winner there
Got too excited and posted too early.

I'll save it for later.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 8:54, Reply)
Premature epostulation there mate.
And yes, Dozer, I know that's not a real word.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:00, Reply)
yes, because you went to dictionary.com first
Do your lips move when you're silently reading?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:01, Reply)
Christ, you're a charmer this morning.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:10, Reply)
yes dear

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:25, Reply)
Let him get on with it.
His superiority complex is inpenetrable.

Alright.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:46, Reply)
Today is payday and not my 1-2-1 now
I have a sausage, egg and mushroom sarnie en route and an interesting days work ahead.

Got overtime for tonight, Saturday and Sunday which is actually really easy to do

I do rather like the countryside, yes. Prefer the beach though. Moving next to it was a really good idea
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:13, Reply)
I have a sausage sandwich and a cappuccino 'cos I'm well sophisticated, innit.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:22, Reply)
This lighthouse is round the corner from my house
www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/northern-lights--aurora-borealis-3190721
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:23, Reply)
I have a working windmill a couple of streets from my house

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:25, Reply)
When I lived in Sunderland, so did I

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:28, Reply)
You don't get any of that shit over London.
We've made the sky our bitch. It behaves itself and only shows the light we fucking tell it to.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:25, Reply)
We've always rocked the orange glow look round here

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:27, Reply)
I didn't even see it and I can see that lighthouse from the end of my street
sad times
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:29, Reply)
Yes, but dozer has got a windmill near his house
A fucking windmill!!
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:26, Reply)
alright Andrew Marr

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:26, Reply)
Watching that must help the lonely days go past a little easier.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:28, Reply)
Perhaps he and "mrs dozer" sit and watch it together, with a nice glass of whiskey

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:29, Reply)
whiskey?
As if!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:29, Reply)
I did the Jameson's tour a few years back and they told me it's loads better than that Scottish muck

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:31, Reply)
and they wouldn't lie to you, they're whiskey people

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:11, Reply)
Whisky

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:49, Reply)
Is that his hamster?
I didn't know they were actually married.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:31, Reply)
Where is it you live, Northumberland?
Nice area, been there a bit.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:23, Reply)
About 5 miles south of Northumberland

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:27, Reply)
My breakfast were a chicken pie shoved inside a bacon roll.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:45, Reply)
That sounds filling.
Basic, but filling.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:48, Reply)
Yeah, I had a few pints last night so needed something to take the edge off.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:49, Reply)
Doesn't the coal get in the way of sunbathing?

(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:48, Reply)
Bit concerned about the lack of a new question of the week
I hope scaryduck is alright
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:15, Reply)
I like the countryside. It's got cows and sheep and chickens and piggy wiggies.
And they're made of meat.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:18, Reply)
+ country pubs

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:19, Reply)
These also have meat in.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:20, Reply)
You can get all those things in the city now

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:19, Reply)
+ which I can set fire to if the government displeases me

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:21, Reply)
I mostly set fire to them if I get hungry, ham-hands.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:21, Reply)
I just did a poo

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:26, Reply)
Now wash your hands

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:27, Reply)
The countryside is full of right-wing Christian little-England alcoholics and sister-botherers.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:26, Reply)
alright Andy Parsons

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:27, Reply)
Bit harsh

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:28, Reply)
Alright Rhona Cameron.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:28, Reply)
I like the countryside but I hate camping.
Id much rather stay in a nice converted farmhouse.
Love going for country walks, inhaling the fresher air and seeing more stars than one normally would.

Weekend plans, Im tidying my garden and having a spring clean.
Maybe throw a bit retail therapy in for good measure.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:42, Reply)

fresher air stench of cow shit and unwashed Worzels.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:43, Reply)
You've been tidying your garden for months now.
Lazy sucker.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:47, Reply)
Nope. Had it strimmed last week and tidying it this week.
I've been MOANING about it for months.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:49, Reply)
Ah, ok.
I'll let you off then.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:54, Reply)
Meeting a couple of mates for food and pints tonight.
Another mate is up for a Leo Sayer tomorrow.
Self-loathing and introspective ennui Sunday.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:44, Reply)
My flatmate is convinced that Leo Sayer has moved in next door to us.
She has based this on a guitar left against the door one day, a brief glimpse of a curly head and a Royal Mail delivery note for an "L Sayers" pinned to the noticeboard.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:47, Reply)
Your flatmate sounds like a bit of an idiot.
I'd probably run with it though, see how much mileage you can get out of it.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:49, Reply)
She's a bit dappy, to be sure.
It's like having a pet bassett hound that can cook a curry.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:51, Reply)
That sounds amazing to be honest.
All my dog has ever done is chew my glasses.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:53, Reply)
I had a five minute fight with my dog before setting off to work

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:55, Reply)
Who won?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:56, Reply)
Me

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:03, Reply)
lol, an old housemate used to get home about 30 minutes before my other housemate (the dogs proper owner).
So used to take great pleasure spending that half an hour winding the absolute fuck out of the dog then buggering off to the pub.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:00, Reply)
Excellent dog-owning.
Mine is a fucking idiot, but hilarious. When I give her a biscuit she likes to run off and hide it somewhere, and then come back to me and get me to find it. However, she gives the game away by running off again to protect it as soon as you start to move towards her, hence revealing it's location. As I say, a fucking idiot.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:20, Reply)
Ours drools and looks dense.
Live in the hope that one day, he may learn to retrieve a stick.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:55, Reply)
This one retrieves fine, she's just a fucking prick for giving whatever she's retrieved back afterwards.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:58, Reply)
What do you want with a stick anyway?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:01, Reply)
Fair point.
He may actually be a bit more intelligent than the average mutt then.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:11, Reply)
mine died on monday :(

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:11, Reply)
WIV KEN DODDS DADS DOG NOW :(

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:27, Reply)
thank you for your kind words at this difficult time

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:35, Reply)
On the plus side, the smell should go from your house soon

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:37, Reply)
this makes me feel like dancing

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:49, Reply)
I'll do the music then.
I'm a one man band.
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:54, Reply)
I found out yesterday that my mate Griff knows Holly Johnson

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:51, Reply)
Likes trains, does he?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:56, Reply)
Just milky coffees

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:04, Reply)
Michael Burke took a dump in a school friend's downstairs bog, once.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:06, Reply)
Off work today so sawing logs and
a planned assault on the bowels of the dishwasher. It's like Clangers' moon in there.

Oh and I don't mean the wife.
(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 28 Feb 2014, 9:51, Reply)
exploring the bowels of the dishwasher is a great euphemism

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:05, Reply)
not as good as "feeding a chip to a red squirrel"

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:14, Reply)
Haha.
Chucking a sausage down main street.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:18, Reply)
the countryside is full of feces and murderers
Camping is for people that can't afford a hotel.

I like that meat is grown in the countryside.

Shit off.
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:00, Reply)
Already done the meat joke, you bent spastic.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:04, Reply)
yeah I don't read back through all this shit you quantum cunt

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:05, Reply)
Oh boy!

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:06, Reply)
Maybe you should, that way you'd stop looking like a prick.
Alright?
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:06, Reply)
it'll take more than that
Yer, two client meetings today which is a bit shit though

How's the job hunt?
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:07, Reply)
Not seen much that interests me since the last one.
Trying to wangle a payrise out of the current lot to tide me over.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:10, Reply)
I like the countryside, cities are shit and full of cunts and tourists.
Camping is only fun if you can guarantee it won't rain and you can take plenty of friends and alcohol.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:08, Reply)
camping is also shit when its sunny cos you get woken up at 5am then slowly roasted in your tent

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:10, Reply)
Also, I like to wash in the morning in surroundings slightly more sophisticated
than a wooden shed filled with other men's hairy arses.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:12, Reply)
yeah right, "wash"
like you Frogs do that.....
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:15, Reply)
Get up and have some breakfast then!

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:12, Reply)
I prefer it if someone cooked it for me and gave it to me on a plate, on a table, in a dining room

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:14, Reply)
Don't go camping with the football team..

(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:17, Reply)
I have never played a game of football in my entire life, fact

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:20, Reply)
public schoolboy cunt

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:21, Reply)
this^
Rugby, hockey, cricket
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:24, Reply)
+ buggery

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:30, Reply)
quite so

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:31, Reply)
Hockey, like Lacrosse, is a girl's game.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:32, Reply)
My favourite part of camping is when you crawl out of the tent on a comedown.
And look at the bag it's meant to go back in as a solitary tear rolls down your cheek.

Then you fuck off to the bus queue.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:41, Reply)
I'm looking forward to when the kids decide they want to camp out in the back garden

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:11, Reply)
+ so I can finger them to my heart's content

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:15, Reply)
Nakers touches kids on the cunt

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:27, Reply)
Ours is 3 1/2 and looking forward to this weekend a great deal. 2 bedroom tent so plenty of room for us, her, dog etc.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:17, Reply)
you know what has even more room?
A hotel or cottage
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:19, Reply)
The space between your ears?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:20, Reply)
that is currently full of snot

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:22, Reply)
Me too.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:20, Reply)
haha
Nice and sinister. I think I saw a pic of you on Lusty's FB
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:21, Reply)
I dinna FB so can't check.
Fat, gormless, glasses? Prolly me.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:22, Reply)
Yep

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:32, Reply)
So you'll know that as long as you keep your garden plants to under eight foot tall, there'll be nowhere for him to hide.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 28 Feb 2014, 10:22, Reply)

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