Unexpected sausage!
When did you last receive the gift of sausage? Last gift given/sent?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:17, 85 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

I had garlic sausage and halloumi just yesterday!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:18, Reply)

I had a sausage and egg bap just this morning!

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:20, Reply)

glamorgan sausages or gtfo
last gift was a surprise designer t-shirt for frog.

last gift received... er....
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:20, Reply)

Gay pink trainers

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:22, Reply)

oh yeah
imma wear those tomorrow. they are so pretty.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:27, Reply)

Cool I will wear my green ones and we can look a right pair of colour blind twats :)

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:28, Reply)

You two are the Terry & June of the internet.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:30, Reply)

Hyacinth and Richard

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:38, Reply)

^ trying to purchase affection.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:26, Reply)

^ nobody bothers to purchase his ^

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:26, Reply)

I cannot be bought.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:27, Reply)

£100k says you can

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:29, Reply)

That's loose change.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:30, Reply)

"Love can close a bridge
Between your heart and mine
£100k can close a bridge
Don't you think it's time?"
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:31, Reply)

Well done.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:32, Reply)

nobody wants to buy you
that is a very different thing
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:30, Reply)

All sausages have been carefully planned.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:21, Reply)

^bummed

( Kroney, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:23, Reply)

I gave YM an unexpected sausage only last night.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:24, Reply)

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeey chipolata

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:27, Reply)

Alright Jason, give sporters his login back.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:24, Reply)

DG
*nods*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:27, Reply)

I have framed one an A2 photograph for some friends, and am going to send it at the end of the month to them, as a surprise housewarming gift.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:24, Reply)

I like this a great deal

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:25, Reply)

I may have sausages for lunch.
I may also give myself the gift of a wank later.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:25, Reply)

Sausage wrestle

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:26, Reply)

No sausage but I've just had TWO bacon baps to make up for yesterday's chip butty debacle
Just watching the Robocop remake. I'm hoping Gary Oldman is saving up to direct something decent given all the quick paycheck roles he's been doing lately.
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:28, Reply)

That was "OK"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:30, Reply)

It's comically bad so far, so I hope it gets better

( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:32, Reply)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
"That's not even my brain!"

Fucking hell
( Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:33, Reply)

The idea of a Robocop movie that I could conceivably take my kids to see
makes me feel sad
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:32, Reply)

I enjoyed it, although I can see why others didn't.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:34, Reply)

Maybe they have slightly more discerning tastes

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:37, Reply)

I haven't received any sausage in a long time.
Last gift given was yesterday, I sent Swipey some flowers, chocolates and whiskey. She won't have got them yet.
( Peej, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:29, Reply)

i'll send the whiskey back
then we both win
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:31, Reply)

Is it to help frog find the wet patch?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:36, Reply)

officechuckle

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:40, Reply)

He just waits until she farts and aims between the folds

( Peej, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:40, Reply)

Muff guff stuff

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:43, Reply)

mrs bought me a sausage sarnie just the other day.
She's a keeper!
( Kroney, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:31, Reply)

Is this a proposal?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:40, Reply)

Well, Nakers, I'm not really sure how to say this
but I just don't love you enough to make that sort of commitment.
( Kroney, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:45, Reply)

I'm actually considering going to the butchers to buy some sausages today
SPOOKY DOOKY!
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:32, Reply)

Not had sausage in a while, the sandwich shop I've been going to does fucking excellent bacon
So I've been having that instead.

Last gift given was a pint last night, because I'm a nice guy like that.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:35, Reply)

Classic AA^

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:36, Reply)

*click*

( Peej, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:41, Reply)

My expenses get paid today
I might have expenses cans on the way home
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:35, Reply)

Carling? Or is that too classy?
I'm investigating train can etiquette as I shall shortly be a tube commuter.
( Kroney, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:40, Reply)

No drinking allowed on the tube
Btw the tube to uxbridge takes about 7 weeks
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:42, Reply)

If by 7 weeks you mean "a little over an hour" then yeah, sure.
Driving only takes 30 minutes. Not sure I'm going to be able to give up the car.
( Kroney, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:44, Reply)

Didn't you move out of Uxbridge before?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:46, Reply)

Yeah, to Muswell Hill.
That was a 45 minute car commute and the tube commute involved a bus, the Northern line and then the Met. Well shit.
( Kroney, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:47, Reply)

A40? That's a shit drive

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:47, Reply)

Been alright so far.
B whatever to A4000 to A40. Not hit heavy traffic yet, so it's not a true test.
( Kroney, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:48, Reply)

correct
some mornings it took me 25 mins. but most mornings it was 45-60. the worst was when some young lad in a convertible was doing a ridiculous speed and beheaded himself, not on a samurai sword, but on a gantry. we were held up for about 2 hours in the morning, as the police were still looking for his head.

and the tube... shudder. it's fucking SHIT. it stops between stations and it bounces and it terminates unexpectedly at rayners lane and half the time you get stuck at rayners lane and there are no buses. SHIT.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 11:04, Reply)

I'll be getting a homemade card and bottle of brandy for Father's Day.Last year the dog got me a card too, with his pawprint on it, ffs,

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:37, Reply)

Silly dog thinks he's people
You'd better put him down before we end up with a planet of the dogs style distopian nightmare
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:38, Reply)

Good point,

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:45, Reply)

Bottle of gin from the step-daughter \o/

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:38, Reply)

I'd be happy with a lie in and a cup of tea

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:39, Reply)

I would too

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:40, Reply)

With your step daughter?
That's vile.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:47, Reply)

Like you wouldn't

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 10:48, Reply)

lol
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-sussex-27828845
( Kroney, Fri 13 Jun 2014, 11:08, Reply)