One hour of work left. Two punters all morning. Not bad at all.
What's not bad in yourday ?
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 10:55, 96 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Where the fuck is your surgery?
Every time I've been to the docs there are queues out the fucking door
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 10:58, Reply)

Cancellations and no shows. I always have a full appointment list.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:00, Reply)

Channeling your inner Shipman for a quieter day eh?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:02, Reply)

Ha. Misunderstood chap.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:06, Reply)

he was my grandmother's doctor for a while
she loved him.

he didn't kill her though.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:11, Reply)

He did wear her like a glove though

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:17, Reply)

Just leave the computer logged in and leave the room for 3 minutes.... call it a 15 minute session and you got 12 minutes to have a wank between me and the next punter.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:20, Reply)

That's because up North
You all have lice, rickets and AIDS.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:20, Reply)

Bloody luxury

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:20, Reply)

When we were growing up, we used to dream of rickets.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:28, Reply)

Thats ADAM shame

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:38, Reply)

Nothing.
I've got loads of work to do and a busy evening ahead of me.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:03, Reply)

gin and spliff in the garden yeah?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:10, Reply)

I'll see you there!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:18, Reply)

it's sort of sunny i suppose

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:10, Reply)

I have 200' of fence wood and a table saw as my weapons of choice this evening

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:17, Reply)

10 minutes before my alarm went off some prick was using some sort of chainsaw and another arsehole was hitting a pin with a hammer.
Silence after I got up.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:32, Reply)

you need to build this
www.wimp.com/clevercut/
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:33, Reply)

Thats mint!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:38, Reply)

That is indeed very clever.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:42, Reply)

Hello??
llo?? llo??
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:26, Reply)

It does seem rather quiet here.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:28, Reply)

Just me and you Doc
Wanna play Docs and Nurses?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:28, Reply)

I don't swallow on the first date, or bareback anal.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:37, Reply)

Fucking prude

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:38, Reply)

Hi sporto!
How are you?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:28, Reply)

Fine thanks. You?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:28, Reply)

Yeah, I'm good ta

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:29, Reply)

Top bants^

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:31, Reply)

Your mum is top bants.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:35, Reply)

Top bants and no pants

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:39, Reply)

The indisputable
Top bants. Close friends get to call him TB
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:40, Reply)

Stop badgering me

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:41, Reply)

trying to start a cullt?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:42, Reply)

Yeah
Im going to call it the SeaShells Sanctuary
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:46, Reply)

clever

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:51, Reply)

Well; it's hump day, so that's nice, and it's payday too, so technically that should be nice, although it doesn't really make much of a difference.
It's sunny, and - dan dan dan! I'm going to get my hair cut.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 11:59, Reply)

Hump day? That time of the year again?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:05, Reply)

Hump of the week, innit.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:20, Reply)

Why Wednesday? And is it marked on yourcalendar?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:33, Reply)

Because it's the middle day of the working week?

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:35, Reply)

Payday's on Monday
I'm just starting the argument with my last letting agent who - quel surprise - is attempting to hold on to my bond. I'll wait and see if the pointy-shoed twat will actually meet me or if I have to just turn up at his open-plan office (at his busiest time)and have a word -loudly.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:13, Reply)

can anyone remember if i've done a poo today?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:11, Reply)

Don't think you've done one since the 12th
b3ta.com/search/posts/57534?q=poo
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:13, Reply)

no wonder a feel a little quare

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:27, Reply)

you're always full of shit

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:13, Reply)

Hardly surprising if it's been backing up for the last 13 days

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:14, Reply)

red and brown trousers
nice
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:15, Reply)

Worst of all the Kate Bush songs.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:21, Reply)

Kate's bush. One for the wank bank.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:24, Reply)

Rolling Stone's editorial style gets right up my nostrils.

( Kroney, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:20, Reply)

You're meant to read it, not snort it.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:22, Reply)

Don't read it then.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:24, Reply)

it's total shit

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:27, Reply)

Why?

( Kroney, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:02, Reply)

I think it's because of the editorial style

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:05, Reply)

Sure that might and does make it irritating.
Doesn't render the whole magazine shit, though.
( Kroney, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:08, Reply)

"chewy luis in the news"
lololol
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:35, Reply)

It's not that funny

( Peej, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:47, Reply)

compared to drafting an article for the guardian about restrictive covenants it fucking well is

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:48, Reply)

Yes but by that comparison cot death is fucking hilarious.

( Peej, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 12:55, Reply)

A Million Ways To Die In The West is excellent

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:10, Reply)

+north.
Just accuse scousers of being grief lovers
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:29, Reply)

ha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:36, Reply)

Ive had a load of data importing, BT line congestion issues and moaning sales staff.
Crises averted now
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:45, Reply)

I've just been a fucking idiot. Took my daughter to Nandos for lunch.
#revolting
#nochivesonthemenu
#orelderberries
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:47, Reply)

You do realise this could affect your access rights?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:47, Reply)

I checked with her mother first.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:49, Reply)

*contacts social services*

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:50, Reply)

I dont mind a Nandos, truth be told
I ended up in the one on Chalk Farm Road with two of the lads from work years ago. We were pissed as farts and ordered a fuckload of stuff (expenses). When the MASSIVE platter turned up we nommed away happily, only to find about 20 mins in that we'd also eaten the next table's food and the kitchens were now closed
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 14:02, Reply)

I've never been to Nando's
ENT EVEN MAD.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 14:05, Reply)

For generic chicken/chips/rice its "ok"
The sauces aren't too bad and the dust stuff you can get on your chips is a good idea
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 14:07, Reply)

Seasoning chips with fajita seasoning works quite well.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 14:09, Reply)

I had a 4kg tumour on my nuts but couldn't be fucked to go to the doctors about it.
It took the family going "what the fuck is THAT" to make me think that perhaps I ought to do somethign about it

#everybodyisaretard
( Kroney, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:48, Reply)

Everybody is OUR tard, you northern prick

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:50, Reply)

No, Nakers is our tard.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:56, Reply)

Didn't it hurt lugging that around?
I had the mumps and one of my bollocks swelled to about lemon-sized. It was agony. I had to buy some briefs and everything.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 13:57, Reply)

I have coffee and a Twix
The office is quiet and I'm just getting on with bits and pieces. I've had worse days (see Monday and Tuesday)
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 14:04, Reply)

Nothing is 'not bad', it's all bad.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 14:05, Reply)

MEATWOE

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 14:08, Reply)

RT

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 25 Jun 2014, 14:10, Reply)