Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
« Go Back | Popular
BUM THREADWe nearly all have a bum, we use them for doing big plops, sitting on and putting willys in, but what else do you use yours for?
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 8:31,
251 replies,
latest was 10 years ago)
beast roll deleted your fraud comment, i think you have upset him you meeny(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 8:38,
Reply)
and thats why you are (maybe not everyones but certainly mine) the saviour(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:27,
Reply)
i hope you declare any income from this work(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 8:53,
Reply)
Listen mate, if you need some freelance consulting on tax evasion I'm your man. No restructuring too big or too small, cash in hand to avoid my creditors if you know what i mean and i think that you do.(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:01, Reply)
Cash in hand is actually the best, aslong as you can get away with it.(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:12, Reply)
I like to wiggle mine suggestively to attract mates(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 8:53,
Reply)
Wow I timed my return wellI used mine to drown Pompeii in barely-processed scotch bonnets.
Pompeii is what I call my boyfriend's willy.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 8:55, Reply)
you fancy simon weston when he has a string vest on(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:00,
Reply)
Simon Weston cheats on you with me because I treat him like a princessand buy him spangly things. On Wednesdays we wear pink
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:02, Reply)
i prefer my disabled or disfigured war veterans a bit more 'current' hence me and johnson beharry 'going steady'(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:05,
Reply)
hes always 'in heat', its a never ending estrous cycle with that cyborg sex bastard(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:09,
Reply)
*walks away in 30 seconds flat*/film
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:28,
Reply)
Is that to match his "face"?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:23,
Reply)
Hey Darth, I was wonderingDo your infrequent visits here coincide with coming off the medication or going back on it?
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:01,
Reply)
Actually I've been unmedicated for a while now on the grounds that it doesn't fucking workMy visits coincide with something much more severe; being bored enough to talk to you
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:04, Reply)
I think you may discover deeper levels of boredom on here (
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:05,
Reply)
Good thanks. The football is going well for once!What's going on in Darth-land?
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:24,
Reply)
Aye, same here!Is O'Driscoll still in charge? Sorry I've started ignoring everything else due to Forest's success and the travelling comedy troupe under the new management of Louis van Gaal
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:27, Reply)
Steve Cottrill has been given a go as manager this season.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:36,
Reply)
OuchYou're really working through our exes. Billy Davies' go next. That's a barrel of laughs
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:38, Reply)
Won't be as funny as Bristol Rovers ending up in the Conference! (
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:41,
Reply)
Haha really?Funnier than United's "We're rich and have no defenders, what to do..." transfer policy
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:50, Reply)
Its been ages since I started a threadand this place is getting shitter every day. Coincidence?
(
Peej, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:19,
Reply)
PJ threads are always high qualityAnything is better than that 'doctor' and his dull-news-link-try-to-get-a-real-srs-debate-going-or-look-at-me-threads
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:24,
Reply)
I use mine for sweeping the floor behind me as I walk.Morning, one and all.
Well, except you. You know who you are. And you know why.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:24,
Reply)
we need to know which forum poster you hate and why please(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:28,
Reply)
( ) ( ( )
)\ ) ( /( )\ ))\ ) ( /(
(()/( )\())(()/(()/( )\())
/(_)|(_)\ /(_))(_)|(_)\
(_)) ((_)(_))(_))__ ((_)
/ __| / _ \| _ \ _ \ \ / /
\__ \| (_) | / /\ V /
|___/ \___/|_|_\_|_\ |_|
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:30,
Reply)
Acually I joined the singles clubSo not a classic, but am much happier for it, now
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:40, Reply)
Well, this calls for a long and involved text message.Answer your phone, fucknuts.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:50,
Reply)
Maybe the relationship went wrong because you kept texting him.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:54,
Reply)
I probably broke up Harters' marriage as well.(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:01,
Reply)
Long story mateApologies for the hideous cliche, but it's for the best
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:59, Reply)
I use mine to handle all my internet furniture needs(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:25,
Reply)
\o/I have coffee and had a sausage sandwich. A good start to the day, no?
Also my scheduled work for today has just been cancelled \o/
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:27,
Reply)
good, you deserve a good day, youve earnt it(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:29,
Reply)
I may or may not have just eaten five custard donuts.I regret nothing.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:32,
Reply)
they had duffins in tesco but i only noticed on the way out :((
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:35,
Reply)
I might be slightly starting to regret it now.(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:37,
Reply)
No regrets!!!I ate a LOT of cheddar with balsamic onions last night.
I can feel the coronary.
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:59,
Reply)
I'm disgusted with you.I mean, custard ones? Really?
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:56,
Reply)
Also, *doughnuts, you awful Yank.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:56,
Reply)
Fair point, well made.Though I still believe the custard ones are the nicest.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:04,
Reply)
Cold custard is an abomination.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:05,
Reply)
Custard slices are heavenly.patisserie Valerie ones are the tits.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:07,
Reply)
Why don't you cum all over?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:29,
Reply)
its more of a crème pâtissière than a chutney m8(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:04,
Reply)
Switching off lights at the old folks home(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:56,
Reply)
Right I'm off the gymNo, seriously, I am. Well, to the changing rooms anyway. A boy's gotta eat. Laters potatoes
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:07, Reply)
he's been here all along.Attention seeking queen
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:18,
Reply)
Sitting on Curly Wurlys to make them nice and softMorning Meaty!
(
Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:13,
Reply)
Is it Thursday again?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:14,
Reply)
Ha! I knew I'd confuse you(
Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:14,
Reply)
I knew you couldn't keep away from me(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:20,
Reply)
Like rubbernecking at a car accident(
Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:26,
Reply)
Typical menfolk on here.Like flies round shit with the hint of a tit.
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:28,
Reply)
My nipples were like chapel hat pegs until Thursday(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:31,
Reply)
It's quite tragic, really.Meanwhile, you, me, swipe, cavy and possibly the new girl will all be hanging out in the corner comparing stories about boys.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:31,
Reply)
No dear, I'll be on the dance floor after 10 voddy red bulls with me knickers round my ankles.(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:34,
Reply)
Can you blame us when the previous options were you, jase, swipe and cavy?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:38,
Reply)
Oh, because the menflok hold such captivating beauty and ruggish manliness?!(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:44,
Reply)
My mum says I'm handsome(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:57,
Reply)
Well yeah, but that's hardly a ringing endorsement(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:56,
Reply)
.... none of whom would be caught dead anywhere near a lentil mung bean farting beard (
rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:50,
Reply)
But where am I on yours?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 11:06,
Reply)
i don't have one, but if i did you'd be about fourth i imagine(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 11:07,
Reply)
Silly menDon't they know there are no real women on the internet, I'm really a truck driver from Wigan.
(
Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:31,
Reply)
I could tell it was that kind of place(
Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:30,
Reply)
We used to have a right laugh on here. I has a chronic red wine hang over.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:50, Reply)
I've drank about 4 litres of water already this morning. I just had a piss and it smelt like sugar puff milk.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:59, Reply)
I worked out on Sunday that I'd drank 10 bottles of water/lucozade sport without needing a pissI was that warm/dehydrated
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 11:03,
Reply)
Alright, twatface?A hangover is nature's way of telling you that the drink is wearing off. Best have some midmorning cans.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:53,
Reply)
a red wine hangover? like....like a girl! i see....(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:54,
Reply)
Everyone knows that real men drink lager tops.(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:57,
Reply)
« Go Back | Reply To This »