b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 376038 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1

« Go Back | Popular

Go on then, I haven't started one for a while...


Morning everyone! We're nearly halfway through the week. How are we all?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 8:44, 246 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
G'day Sam
I got an early night last night but still feel tired today. Not as bad as I was feeling last night though.

I think I'll take it easy again tonight, perhaps tidy up a bit and mess about learning about linux some more before heading to bed nice and early again.

How has the week been treating you?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 8:52, Reply)
This week has been treating me somewhat better than last week
Although still not amazing...

Pay day today though!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 8:53, Reply)
Morning Sam
and morning to you too VX.

I have a lot of furniture moving to do at work, as my office is to be done up and I have to move out today. Bollocks.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 8:56, Reply)
hey folks
I woke up about two hours ago. YAY for being sick allowing me to stay home and bludge!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 8:57, Reply)
Morning VC & K2!
What's bludging mean? Is that Aussie for skiving?

Tonight I'm going to spend some of my pay cheque on a nice bottle of whisky, so I can relax. My creditors can all wait until tomorrow!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:00, Reply)
FFS, Sam
Have you never watched Neighbours or Home and Away?

:-)
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:01, Reply)
Yup - that's exactly what it means!
It also means being a lazy sod.

good to see y'all folks!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:02, Reply)
I watched Neighbours twice a day for years
(kicked the habit now)

and I'm sure I've never heard the term bludging!

Haven't seen Home & Away since it changed to Channel 5 years ago. I'm not much of a TV watcher really.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:02, Reply)
Morning all
K2 moving stuff in the office, I may have to do that soon as well, so I feel your pain.

Vampy I thought you couldn't afford to take time off! Naughty lady.

Sam, I wish my week would treat me better, but it's not.

X you're a bad man, just because.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:02, Reply)
Morning Dok! I have to move some stuff about in my office as well
because my new screen will be arriving today, but I can't be arsed. That can be tomorrow's job.

I need an admin assistant/cleaner/tea making bitch really!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:04, Reply)
well I can't really
I have two practice exams in a few weeks. :(

But I can't learn anything with a fuzzy brain. So there's no point.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:06, Reply)
Right then
My willing band of helpers has arrived. I must go and shift stuff.

Back later.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:07, Reply)
Sam
I may need a job soon.

Vampy, they're only practice ones so that's OK, and if you're muzzy then there is no point in trying to learn really.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:08, Reply)
put it this way dok
I can't stand up without falling over.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:09, Reply)
Yo Bitches
I don't have to move anything. Although I may move my ass and get some tea
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:10, Reply)
Morning badger!
I'll have a cup if you're making one...

I assume that because you're a Sam your tea making skills are up to the job.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:10, Reply)
Bah
Accused of being a bad man and it's not even 10am. That's got to be a first!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:11, Reply)
Vampy
That's the best definition of muzzy I can think of.

You take the time, and get better. Or we'll send 'The Boys' round!

EDIT Morning Badger.

V it's because you are.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:11, Reply)
Sam
my tea making skillz are awesome. But I like my tea strong so so will you :p
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:12, Reply)

I too had a twice a day Neighbours habit for more than a decade and hadn't picked up on bludging 0_o

I am needing coffee but really want to cut down on it. Might have to move onto herbal tea like that Peppermint or Camomille. It will never be the same though - like ditching Heroin for Cigarettes or something..
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:13, Reply)
I might like that doc
I got tomorrow night off work.
Hey everybody else! /hugs all round

EDIT: It's a younger generation thing. it's not used on tv. It's very much a country thing. /shamed
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:13, Reply)
If you read this
you are gay.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:14, Reply)
Bert
Looking at your name is what makes me a huge ghey lezza.

love you. :D
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:16, Reply)
Morning Bert
As I am now gay I'm afraid I'm going to have to cancel our wild sex date later.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:16, Reply)
Ha ha Home & Away
I remember all-night fishing on Palm Beach and seeing the film crews early in the morning.
My mate and I used to try and get in the background and pull mooners. I don't know if we ever made the directors cut, I don't watch the shite.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:18, Reply)
VC
I have that effect on women.

TGB That's ok, because I don't even need you to have wild sex. The other night I warmed up some margarine in the microwave, poured it over a basketball stuffed with ham, dressed myself up as Lee Majors and fucked til I was totally spent.
You can't compete with that.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:19, Reply)
But Dok
I'm not a bad man....really!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:20, Reply)
I don't think I want to Bert
Why did you get called a bad man V? WOuld you like a hug and grope?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:21, Reply)
Woohoo
I am now gay. Can I be a lesbian? Please?

V I know I'm just teasing.

But Vampy, you won't like these Boys.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:23, Reply)
TGB
I don't think it's just a hug and a grope he wants.

EDIT: How come? Are their willies larger then their egos? or are they nasty bad men who do nasty bad things?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:23, Reply)
What Captain V
really needs is some eucalyptus and the Guttenburg Bible.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:24, Reply)
Why wouldn't I want a hug and a grope with Badger?
She's awesome at both!

@Dok You shouldn't be teasing because it's true !
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:26, Reply)
not saying you don't want them
Just saying you might want more. /grins
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:27, Reply)
You're not wrong there

(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:29, Reply)
Vampy
They are nasty bad men, and they do nasty bad things. Their cocks are bigger than their egos though.

Pah V, I'll get you for eliciting sympathy from me.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:29, Reply)
Morning.
I've got a fireman coming to see me in an hour.
And I drew this last night.

So... Any questions you've ever wanted to ask a fireman, but been afraid to? Now's your chance.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:31, Reply)
*hugs and gropes V*
*strokes his silky soft hair*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:31, Reply)
Morning, all!
How are we, today?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:31, Reply)
ok
I will not like these Boys then.

I need booby jiggling. :( Being sick makes me sad.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:31, Reply)
Kaol
Cheeeeeeeeeeeeese rocket.

Wonderful.

*jiggles Vampys boobies*

There you go.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:34, Reply)
Bert's post
Made me lose The Game.
Morning everyone!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:34, Reply)
Chains you fucker
Kaol I'd like to ask him: Do you ever slide down the pole naked just to see what it feels like?

Would you watch all the other naked fireman sliding down the pole?

Would you lick the pole after the other naked fireman had slid down it?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:36, Reply)
err thanks dok.
That was oddly nice. don't do it again though.

LIC: Damn you!!! I just lost the game!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:36, Reply)
TLC
You bastard, now we've all lost too.

Kaol ask him what's the best way to set your ex on fire, but still make it look like an accident. Preferably involving homemade napalm and an empty Mr Muscle squirter.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:36, Reply)
Badger
You seam to be very preoccupied with firemans poles.

EDOT Vampy you asked for boobie jiggling!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:37, Reply)
Well we know what happens if you put a vacuum cleaner in your mouth
Ask him if you can try putting his hose in your gob IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:37, Reply)
Morning all
Well, I'm in nice and early, but can't really be bothered working. So I'm just sitting on here, and repeatedly checking my e-mail. What fun.

Kaol, as him if he has ever licked some fire to see what it tastes like.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:38, Reply)
Burt, it looks like you've already worked that one out...
As for the "putting his hose in my mouth" idea...
One simple misunderstanding and I'll get a gob-full of cock.
Not the best way to start a Wednesday.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:39, Reply)
true
I wasn't expecting anyone to go ahead and do it.

how naive of me.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:41, Reply)
No I'm not Dok....
Although I am going to start watching Rescue Me again soon so I can watch all the firemen in that and imagine I'm sliding down Denis Leary's the pole
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:41, Reply)
Dear Mr Fireman
Have you ever actually rescued a cat from a tree or is that just on telly?
Do people still get their heads stuck in railings?
Does being asked dozens of weird questions make you uncomfortable?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:43, Reply)
Ask him
if he ever starts fires to safeguard his job, and has he got any vacancies for arsonists?

V late reply to TGB (I was downstairs arguing with an idiot): don't worry, I like my tea very strong as well! It's a bit cold now but still drinkable...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:47, Reply)
I've just been given
some of those joke teeth you wind up with a little key then they chomp along your desk. I was shouting "NOM NOM NOM" as they went.

*glees*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:47, Reply)
Dear Mr Fireman
Can I borrow a uniform? My misses has a thing for firemen and I want to make her happy.

It's just siding down poles isn't it Badger?

Ha Vampy, that kind of thinking will get you jiggled more!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:48, Reply)
So many questions!
I might just ask if I can ride his engine and leave it at that.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:49, Reply)
*jiggles and joggles VC's boobies*
Whoever, in my estimation, gives VC the best motorboating wins five cookies and some lint.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:50, Reply)
OMG
FUCK OFF JANE FUCKING GOODY!

I realise this may be hard for you to grasp, but australia doesn't fucking care either!!

Edit: You guys won't get near my boobies again! I'll call on my favourite b3tan to save me!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:51, Reply)
Important Internet Meme Question
Is it NOM NOM NOM or OM NOM NOM?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:52, Reply)
or the lesser used
nyom nyom nyom
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:52, Reply)
If I got cancer
People wouldn't pay me loads of money and give me a wedding.
So she can fuck off.

EDIT: Also, I'd've married her for the money. Not like I'd have to put up with her for long.
And could sell the kids to Michael Jackson.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:53, Reply)
it's quite obviously
Nom Nom Nom.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:53, Reply)
Om nom nom nom

(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:54, Reply)
*VC's favourite b3tan re-appears in a puff of thunder and smoke*
Ta-da!

Now, how can I help you, ironing-board chested antipodean flange sucker girl?

EDIT and everybody knows that it's NYOM NYOM NYOM
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:56, Reply)
LOL

(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:56, Reply)
I was LOL'ing
at the nom conversation in reference to something I was reading on some site yesterday with talking crap/LOL/What ness. Not Bert's insult. I never find Bert funny
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:57, Reply)
It wasn't meant as an insult
It was an observation, the lovely VC has drawn attention to her tiny boobies a couple of times int he past, I wasn't being mean. Now I feel sad.

That's ok TGB, I never find your constant cries for attention, flirting and internet hugs particularly amusing either.

I still feel sad.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 9:59, Reply)
Om nom nom nom
FTW
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:00, Reply)
Excuse me bert
My boobs are more curvy then a ironing board.

They're more like a pair of small oranges.
EDIT: Bert - you are forgiven. For reference - british sizing - 32D.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:01, Reply)
Without
constant attention Bert, I'll die.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:01, Reply)
*hugs*
*snogs*
*snuggles*
*cunts in the fuck*
*is sick to death of using ***s and general internet based non-affection*

*fists*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:02, Reply)
Does that mean you're impervious to murder
Because murder = attention = TGB doesn't die...

:edit: D cup. Nice breast size that *jiggles*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:02, Reply)
Hiya Peeps!
*Jiggles Everyone*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:05, Reply)
*enjoys*
*spluffs*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:05, Reply)
Morning bill!
*jiggles*

My mouse is being really gay and I can't figure out why. Doesn't look like I'll be doing much work today then...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:08, Reply)
Thanks Bert
I should be able to make it to lunchtime now.

And I don't really want to test that theory V.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:09, Reply)
there is d cup and there is d cup
those who look like they are, and those who look like they aren't.

i'm the latter sadly :(

/jiggles bill's man boobs.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:09, Reply)
Logical phallus-y
No attention = death does not imply attention = not death.
Nice try though.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:10, Reply)
Vampy
We don't believe you, not unless you are about six foot tall.

V I like that lack of logic.

Hi Bill.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:14, Reply)
I know LiC
Would've been nice though!

@VC I know what you mean. My ex had the same bra size as you and, well, phwaor! I'm still kicking myself about cocking things up with her (and not just because she's stunning). Ah well.

:edit: And Dok's right. People or normal height that are d cup almost invariably look it.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:15, Reply)
Dok
when I get to the UK you'll see for yourself.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:18, Reply)
Can I feel for myself?
See Dok, I am bad but I'm so bad it's good *winks*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:20, Reply)
Vampy
Is that a promise?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:21, Reply)
well
not without my bra on. but yes.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:22, Reply)
I think when you arrive in the UK
there'll be a massive queue of b3tans at the airport waiting to give your boobs a jiggle...

Edit: Aaaagh I am getting in a real rage with this mouse, I nearly just had to throw it at the wall as hard as I could!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:24, Reply)
ahah
They won't know the date because only one b3tan is going to meet me off the plane.

Bashes are okay though. I know that'll happen at bashes.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:26, Reply)
Right...
Fireman time.
*grabs helmet*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:27, Reply)
Who's meeting you? Or is that a secret?
I'm sure I can hax0r your internetz & find the date of your flight :P
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:27, Reply)
totally
you can't move at bashes for the jiggling
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:27, Reply)
I never heard anyone
compalin of the jiggling.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:28, Reply)
I don't like the jiggling
it goes against everything I stand for.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:29, Reply)
Hmpf.
My C cup bra is getting too small. I definitely don't look like a D.

I am eating hobnobs for breakfast. Om nyom nyom.

I got paid today and have just done my sums for the month and it's depressing. I have £40 a week for food, petrol and anything else I want to spend money on that isn't bills.

I had fucking weird dreams last night. I was housed in a hostel, or rehab or something. A bad hairy with scary eyes man was trying to get in and he was chasing me and I beat him almost to death with a hoe. Then he threw a rubber ball in the air and caught it in his mouth and choked and died, and I was joyous because I hadn't actually killed him, he killed himself. But then someone, a policeman I think, told me that the witnesses would think I did it and I'd go to prison :(
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:29, Reply)
*stoled a quote*
TGB - for something that is basically just an overly complex life support system for a vagina i haven't entered yet, you're pretty damn sexy
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:30, Reply)
It's a secret
And don't hax0r me please.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:30, Reply)
You love it Bert
So shut the fuck up.

Yo Fuzzy! *huggles* Were you eating cheese before you went to bed because that's a weird cheese dream!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:31, Reply)
Ethel
That is disturbing on many levels. Never say that again.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:32, Reply)
Fuzzy!
That's a mad dream. Last night I dreamt that I was showing a colleague how to use google to translate stuff into German.

I'm feeling so sexually frustrated today. Not fun.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:32, Reply)
*sigh*
I always wondered why that ended up with a pepper spray incident.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:34, Reply)
*huggles and facenoms badgerkins*
No, I had some Green and Blacks chocolate though. Chocolate has the same chemicals as cheese, tryptophan I think. Perhaps that's what it was. I still feel all weird.

EDIT: huggles and facenoms for Cap'n too, and everyone else who says hello while I'm typing this :)
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:34, Reply)
Booo Vampy
But I'll take anything I can get. ;)

EDIT Hi Fuzzy, how's things, apart from odd dreams that is?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:36, Reply)
Sam
My mouse at home is really pissing me off. Left-click either doesn't work or double-clicks, click and drag stops working mid-drag but then starts again with whatever is now under the cursor. Just moving a file to a different directory is an exercise in frustration.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:40, Reply)
My mouse at home
drifts or randomly jumps to other poitns on the screen. The other day I was playing some dumb game but the mouse jumped to the close button as I clicked. Muchos Annoyingous followed.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:42, Reply)
There is a cure for these mouse problems
Buy a new one!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:43, Reply)
Psst!
Tis I! Tightly!

Morning and all that. :) *casts eye over thread* I see all is in order here. Well done, team!

*hands around medals and other assorted shiny things*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:45, Reply)
Wow, that is a weird dream!
and to all of you having mouse problems go and buy a Razer Copperhead, best mouse I've ever used. It's a shame they could be considered a little garish though!

Edit: and Hello new arrivals!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:46, Reply)
Shiney
Mornig DiT, How's tricks?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:47, Reply)
I think
I just need a mousemat as my desk is too shiny...

Ooh shiny goodness from Tightly! Thanks :D
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:48, Reply)
I never liked the Razers, always felt more designed for games to me
I have a Logitech MX Revolution, it's the best one they make, about 60 or 70 quid's worth of mouse!

The problem feels like intermittent RF interference, but I haven't got anything new like that in the office. Weird...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:49, Reply)
Tricks?
Just like pulling a rabbit out of a hat. Looks easy, but you get shit in your hair.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:52, Reply)
"Best one they make"
From Logitech; isn't that like saying the least diseased hooker in the whorehouse?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:52, Reply)
Logitech's been my preference for years
Since I had this badboy (the one on the left)!

Never been that much of a fan of the Razer ones as I said, and I wouldn't touch MS hardware with a bargepole... what alternatives are there?!

Had this mouse in the same location for nearly 6 months and it only started acting up yesterday, I can't figure it out! I have a Revolution and an MX1000 at home and they're both absolutely fine.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:55, Reply)
DiT
That's not so bad rabbit pellets don't really stick to hair.

Bill, yes it is.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:55, Reply)
I should really replace my MX 1000
I've had 2 now and both the charging docks have gone a bit shitty. I can't just drop it in and forget anymore, I have to piss about getting it to sit just right and charge.

The MX revolution looks great but I'd rather get a mouse that uses AA or AAA batteries as it means fewer wires, fewer power points and no need to worry about docks going shit.

I'll probably get the VX nano too for my netbook to replace my shitty optical mouse. When I bought that mouse I didn't realise how much I took the resolution of a laser mouse for granted.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:55, Reply)
Yeah my MX1000 needs a bit of a jiggle in the dock to make it charge
I vastly prefer having a lithium battery one though, I only charge them once a fortnight or so and I use my one at work all day! Not too keen on swapping batteries, I have an MX Nano as well and have been through a couple of sets in that...

The advantage of the MX Revolution is that the transceiver is a USB dongle, whilst the charging cradle is completely separate, so you can put that anywhere convenient. Better than having to connect the cradle to power and USB.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 10:58, Reply)
I thought I was up to date with technology
but you guys put me to shame.

/turns to leave in embarrassment.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:00, Reply)
Mouses
What I need is a mouse with non-mechanical buttons that can't get clagged up. Any recommendations?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:00, Reply)
*gets bored of mouse talk*
Can we talk about me again? *internet flirts with everyone*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:01, Reply)
Don't Go Vampy
They'll stop being geeky in a minute or two.

So how are you feeling now?

EDIT Chains, the Apple Mighty Mouse!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:02, Reply)
I just need a mouse...
This trackpad malarkey is quite boring!

Also: *panders to TGB*

EDIT: I am listening to Mezzanine by Massive Attack, and it's making me all nostalgic (I had also forgotten quite how good it is). What are you listening to?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:02, Reply)
What do you mean by non-mechanical buttons?!
Surely that's an oxymoron! And what does it get clagged up with?

Edit: Bonus points for using mouses instead of mice...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:02, Reply)
A dongle would certainly be an improvement.
I'd still rather have a couple of sets of rechargeable AAs or AAAs and than a dock; having to faff about trying to get my mouse to charge really annoys me. It shouldn't but it does, a lot.

:edit: Sam it's more likely a contradiction in terms. (Yes I'm being a pedant about the meaning of oxymoron, sad aint it)
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:03, Reply)
Yeah, the cradle is definitely better designed on the Revolution as well
But seriously, how often do you recharge it?

As I said I use this one 8 hours a day and it needs recharging every two weeks or so...

Edit: Dok, if his normal mouse gets clogged up then a Shitey Mouse is the worst possible suggestion! I didn't think they'd manage to make a gayer and worse designed mouse than their previous efforts, but they did.

Edit 2: Good choice Mr Tights! I am listening to the rather excellent Ojos de Brujo's second album, Barí.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:04, Reply)
Like touch buttons
like on the ipod. Or on touch screens. Or.. *runs out of examples*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:04, Reply)
Well, Mr. DiT,
I was listening to a fireman.
Now I'm listening to "This Station Is Non-Operational" by At The Drive-In.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:05, Reply)
Oh Kaol
What did the Fireman say in response to all the questions?

EDIT Badger, did you know that you didn't have to touch the scren of the original touch screens.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:07, Reply)
LiC
I'm feeling kinda shabby. but not as rotten as this morning. I might just milk it and have tomorrow off just to shake it off properly though.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:08, Reply)
He said "Yes" to all of them.
Actually, I didn't ask him.

He kept talking about his "appliance" though. Turns out that's fireman-speak for "Fire-Engine".
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:09, Reply)
I did not know that Dok
What did you press instead then!?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:09, Reply)
morning all you fuckers
It is still morning, isn't it? Don't think there is enough black coffee in London to sort my head. Instead of wit, offers C-cups. Yeah, well my bra strap *did just break*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:09, Reply)
I whack it in the dock whenver I'm not using it
But only bugger about to that it'll charge once every 10 days or so. If I don't keep it at 2 - 3 lights I end up forgetting completely and running out of juice while I'm using it. That's the main reason I'd prefer to have replaceable batteries - I'm a forgetful tit.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:10, Reply)
Cackers
I'm willing to offer my hands as a bra replacement for you.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:11, Reply)
All you needed to do
was break infra-red beams set just in front of the screen.

Boo for not asking him, I really would like to borrow one of the uniforms.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:11, Reply)
*jiggles cackers*
Ooh well I feel better at least!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:11, Reply)
Hey Cackers,
How goes it?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:12, Reply)
Yay Cackers
May I offer you my hands to hold your boobies in place.

*jiggles*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:13, Reply)
DOK!
You totally muscled in on my offer!

/elbows dok out of the way and jiggles cackers.

Erm. hi and all. :)
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:14, Reply)
@ Vampy
Ahhh. You are turning me gay. Thanks! I need *new opportunities*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:16, Reply)
Hey cackers
I thought it was spiderman that turned people gay...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:18, Reply)
Mighty Mouse actually looks good!
The buttons get clagged up with gunk, obviously. So I want no moving parts.
Any DNA expert will tell you there's two types of people, shedders and non-shedders. Shedders leave a lot more DNA behind when they handle things (ooer) and I'm one of them.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:18, Reply)
Morning cackers
Having fun on your holiday?

Edit: Light, on the Shitey mouse it's the trackball thing that clogs up really quickly, if you're a shedder it definitely will.

Genius idea, we've got rid of the balls out of the bottom of mouses cos they clog up, let's add another one on the top!

It's also the least ergonomic mouse ever, and is a bit schizophrenic in its ability to decide which button you're trying to press!

The mouses are one of my least favourite things about Apples (and I have a very long list*)

*Note: I'm not just some PC fanboy that bashes them cos I use PCs, I have and use both, and know as much about OSX as I do Windows, but I definitely prefer PCs.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:18, Reply)
no it's bert's face
combined with my newly discovered powers of boobie jiggling.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:18, Reply)
OI!
Why is everybody here so awfully mean to poor old Bert?

My face hasn't turned anybody gay, that I know of. It has turned a few stomachs though.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:20, Reply)
soz peeps
Didn't mean to be rude and disappear, the fella came round unexpectedly. He brought me cake *happies*

But now I must go and do my things to do that need doing. Boring financial things. Boo :(

Praps I'll come back later to distract reward myself.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:20, Reply)
Because Bert
You keep bitching we are too nice so we save up all our bile for you.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:22, Reply)
TGB is right
Make up your mind you mimpy boy

;)
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:23, Reply)
Vampy
We can share, one booobie each. That involves working as a team for jiggling though.

EDIT Bert, Man the Fuck up!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:23, Reply)
Morning Cackers
How's Blighty treating you?
I hadn't thought about the trackball getting clagged. Back to the drawing board.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:25, Reply)
You daft crotchholes
I meant be mean to each other, having it all directed at me is just bullying.

Besides, I gave up on that weeeeeeeks ago.

Dok YES SIR!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:25, Reply)
dok was that written
with the intention of sending my gutter brain into overdrive?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:25, Reply)
How about
something like this?

That's the first one I found on Google, sure there'll be plenty of alternatives though since there must be quite large medical etc markets for them.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:26, Reply)
Fuck off back to your
No HSH-ers allowed thread Bert
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:27, Reply)
TGB
You're totally mental, and I love you. Come on over and answer my question, I'd be intrigued by what you've got to say, and I may even lift the ban on HSH-ers.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:30, Reply)
*wears 'Threadkiller' badge with pride*

(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:37, Reply)
Yes Vampy
I knew you'd like it :) I'm always glad when I can get somebody to sink further into depravity.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:38, Reply)
@ Light
Blighty is treating me extremely well! Thanks for asking. How are you?

Anyone up for some shenanigans later this week? Gaz me.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:39, Reply)
ahaha Shenanigans
Watch the movie Waiting.

You'll be grossed out. And you'll love it.
EDIT: Dok - it's not hard round these parts....
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:45, Reply)
VC
"Waiting" is a good film.

The 5 second rule. Another reason why I don't eat out!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:46, Reply)
Cackers
I would love shenanigans with you this weekend, but unfortunately I can't, I already booked. :(

EDIT Vampy, what to fall further into depravity? If so I am so moving to where you live!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:47, Reply)
Woo, nearly lunchtime
morning all.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:52, Reply)
I should really patent
Or trademark or copyright - whichever - my idea for an Irish-themed cross-dressing bar called "Shemanigans".
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:53, Reply)
you're not sharing my house
you're welcome to visit but you need to stay in town. You're not the b3tan I want to share with. /grins.

Ten second rule is better mate. :D
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:53, Reply)
Cackers
I'm alright, although the fantasy world in my head where I have magic powers is obviously cooler than reality (and requires me to make less of an effort). My goal is to be completely delusional within five years.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 11:58, Reply)
You'd be safe Vampy
I'd bring Mrs Doktor Lemminge with me.

So who is this B3tan? You can tell me I won't tell a soul.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:02, Reply)
I think TLC
just crashed through the floor to a new, lower level of geekdom. Well done, that's impressive, even for B3ta!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:02, Reply)
-zips lips-
nope.
not telling. /grins.

You'll find out next year maybe :)
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:04, Reply)
Hmmm
I'm toying with the idea of, when I next have some disposable income, buying a barcode reader, a data matrix reader and a mag strip card reader to piss about with.

I'm starting to consider having a barcode or data matrix tattoo to go with my planned Li2CaO3 and dot to dot ones.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:05, Reply)
You keep hinting at this secret b3tan VC!
I'm getting curious now...

@ Captain - that's a bit 20th century, get some RFID implants!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:06, Reply)
Vampy
Stop being a tease and tell us!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:08, Reply)
Pfft,
I know who the secret b3tan is.
But I'm not gonna blab.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:08, Reply)
Barcode
tattoos are wank V. If you get one I'll have to cunt you in the fuck
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:09, Reply)
Barcode tat's can look cool sometimes (well occasionally)
the question is what would it come up with when you are scanned?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:10, Reply)
No never
You are dead to me now Bill
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:12, Reply)
aha
don't hold back TGB! I think someone in korea didn't shit their pants in fear!

And Kaol - Please keep that to yourself. :) I trust you with that.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:12, Reply)
He can do what ever he wants, TGB
Let him be the man he wants to be, stop stifling his creativity.

He's got to be himself, can't be nobody else.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:12, Reply)
afternoon
all you weird and wacky people.

How are we all today?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:12, Reply)
And more importantly
What ISO standard of barcodes would you use?

/geek

If Jacqui Smith stays in the cabinet for much longer we'll all have fucking barcodes tattooed on us.

Who is it then Kaol? Is it you?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:13, Reply)
I'll stiffle
whoever I want and everyone will agree with my point of view!

*stiffles with boobs*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:15, Reply)
I did think of that Sam
Would be fun to get a fake e-passport implanted , if it's possible. Could cause a lot of confusion with immigration with that and probably get into a lot of trouble too!

@TGB Most barcode tattoos I've seen certainly aren't readable and I can't be sure about the rest. If I got a data matrix (or one of the other scannable data formats) hardly anybody would know what it was. In some ways I think that'd be cooler.

@Bill I can't decide on that yet

@Sam I was thinking code 39 or 93 as I believe they're readable by most scanners.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:15, Reply)
OK
I think I may know who now, but keeping that information to myself.

Barcode tats are crap, just as Badger says.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:15, Reply)
Dance, dance like you're the wind
let the spirit take you, wherever that may be.

You can't stifle me with your mammary sacs, TGB, nobody can.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:16, Reply)
replying to many...

Just had to move to new guesthouse. (No, was not thrown out of last one. Boys there can't wait for my return this w/e.)

Vampy- you are all intrigue today. Assuming you are feeling better.

Herr Doktor- that is a shame. Sure whatever you've got planned will be fun. Hope it is depraved!

Kaol and Sam - holiday is superb thus far. The tonic.

Bert- you need a good spanking.

Sorry if I missed anyone. My CrackBerry has suffered much. Cackers does play *rough* at times...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:16, Reply)
I was about to protest but ok
*Enjoys stifling*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:16, Reply)
Cackers
Some of it it going to be very depraved.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:17, Reply)
V I didn't ask if they were
scannable Bill did.
And I'll just have to shoot you instead then Bert
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:18, Reply)
*bends over for the spanking*
What are you going to shoot me with, TGB? Is it just a clever way of saying that you'd like to pleasure me with your bamboo dildo?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:20, Reply)
ahah Cackers
i drank a lot of cough medicine earlier and then downed a few tabs of paracetamol. First time in three days that I've not had a headache.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:20, Reply)
I know badger, I didn't really make my point clear
I was trying to say that I think the ones that look unreadable look shit, that the ones that look readable look cooler but that I only think they're cool if they're actually readable.

Perhaps I'll just wait to see whether QR codes or the data matrix emerge as an international standard.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:23, Reply)
The problem is that
even if they are inked perfectly for reading the moment you move the skin stretches differently killing the geometry!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:26, Reply)
I don't think
you could handle my bamboo dildo
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:26, Reply)
Also
The ink will bleed out blurring the image probably making it unreadable as well
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:28, Reply)
Both excellent points
I'll knock that idea on the head. I can't see a data matrix or QR code being any better in those respects either.

Perhaps I'll just have to get RFID implants instead then =p
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:31, Reply)
There is a
fair amount of give and take with barcode reading equipment.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:32, Reply)
Or you could just grow a pair
and get a real tattoo.

Perhaps one that says 'NO FAT CHIX OR DOODZ PLZ'
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:32, Reply)
Bert
has turned in to JMG!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:45, Reply)
I'm still thinking of getting a triforce between my shoulder blades
one of these days...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:46, Reply)
I'm getting
the word "Love" tattooed on my wrist in black ink for my 18th I'm fairly sure.

21st will be a lower back tattoo unless I can afford one earlier.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:48, Reply)
Tats
I'd never get words done, I've seen far too many that just don't last, that's just me though.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:51, Reply)
I'm thinking...
soething like this on the inside of my wrist and then some kind of band around the rest of it maybe

But I dunno. *ums and ahhs*
Something like the middle strip on this flag
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:52, Reply)
Dok
That's the only word I'd ever get. Love is love, it's beautiful and I don't think I'll ever find myself deliberately cutting it out of my life. Love is stupid, irrational, drives me absolutely mental but it's still love and I know it's out there.

EDIT: So there's your mushy moment for tonight. I am in love. and it's showing.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 12:56, Reply)
*sighs*
I've been around Kaol too much I found myself thinking "No you'll find yourself cutting it out of your wrist at 3 in the morning surrounded by empty bottles and promises"

I think that means it's time for a smoke...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:01, Reply)
TGB
I've been that low three times before and it wasn't because of love. Love's made me pretty low but never that bad.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:03, Reply)
I only said it
Not because of the words, but because the tat would fade and blur over time. Thus is wouldn't look so good in a couple of years, or in the worse case illegible.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:12, Reply)
Depends how big
the writing was, font, letter spacing etc
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:14, Reply)
I was planning
on getting it done in letters about an inch and a half tall, and well spaced so that doesn't happen lol.
But I get your point - my dad has one of his first wife's name before she died on his arm, and you can't read it anymore.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:15, Reply)
It's a common problem
People do tend to get lettering done too small. They just don't realise/know what will happen to it over time.

My sister got a very small dove and the word freedom on her shoulder blade, now it's just one blob of blue.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:19, Reply)
I'm expecting
my small stars on my wrist to become blobbified over time
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:20, Reply)
big, bold and out there
all the way.

I've already started planning what my second tattoo is - I'm pretty settled on having Love on my wrist. :)

EDIT: Night folks!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:21, Reply)
TGB, I am not Jam Master Geordie
I have more originality and humour in the tip of my left nipple than that waste of northern flesh could ever hope for.

EDIT and I have a big angel on my left arm, with my daughter's name above it, and some latin beneath it. Because I'm a beautiful person, just like you.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:23, Reply)

and I have a big angel cock on my left arm, with my daughter'sTGB's name above it, and some latin more cocks beneath it. Because I'm a beautiful person,cunt just likeunlike you.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:27, Reply)
***FUNNIEST THING TGB HAS EVER POSTED AWARD***
Thank you, you made me smile.

EDIT and I can't do the nested replies thingy anymore, they're what got me caught.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:30, Reply)
Woo
Just returning the laugh you gave me earlier ;)
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:35, Reply)
You're my favourite B3tan of the day
We should totally like snog and make babies and stuff.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:38, Reply)
ok
if we have to. I'll come all over your face round later
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 13:56, Reply)
What do you guys reckon
I'm thinking of getting my hair cut shorter than it has been for years (but longer than the mistake I made of getting it cut short). I haven't really decide how I'd have it yet and my brief search on the internet found nothing inspiring.

Maybe I should just shave it off and see how it grows back...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:00, Reply)
Cap
howif it grows back.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:08, Reply)
Shave yourself, X.
Shave yourself bald.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:08, Reply)
I'm thinking of shaving my head
In fact I decided on it, then got last minute doubts, so I didn't do it. Still undecided...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:09, Reply)
Clenders that sounds horrendously rude
I'm not going to have laser hair removal LiC!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:13, Reply)
Ooo! I have a hair query.
Fringe or all one length? If I have a fringe then it will hide the wrinkles on my forehead but then you won't be able to see the grey streak I have at the front which looks kind of cool.

*quandries*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:13, Reply)
X
I'll shave you.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:15, Reply)
Afternoon
I've just come home from a jaunt, where I found Ben and Jerries Low fat Ice cream. Can such a thing really exist? I would have thought that such a paradox would implode the world. Maybe what I really have is a black hole contained within a cardboard ice cream tub...
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:15, Reply)
Can I shave someone?
Ooh dunno BGB fringes are great but they need cutting all the time otherwise they just paff in your eyes
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:28, Reply)
Yeah GB
Eye paffing is a definite drawback.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:30, Reply)
Side
What about some kind of side fringe you can pin back?
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:32, Reply)
Emoooooooooooooo.
Pretty much.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:33, Reply)
Today my fringe is series of ringlets.
I look like I'm mental.

Shut the fuck up.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:35, Reply)
I think
you look sexy Clendrix *winks*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:37, Reply)
@Kaol
There's nothing emo about a middle-aged women with a hair crisis.


Grrrr!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:38, Reply)
Blousey
I read that as eye spaffing, I think I'm going slightly mad!

Myself I'd say, no fringe, show the grey and be proud, and cool.

V Shave it, shave it all off. When it doesn't grow back we'll just point and laugh.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 14:47, Reply)
I might get it done tonight
As the barber is open late. Depends if I can make my mind up on how to have it cut.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:07, Reply)
But
if you shave it V we can't stroke your hair! We'll have to just stroke your head *giggles*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:08, Reply)
I'm not getting my head shaved!
I think it needs to be somewhere between the length it is now and the length it was when I last had it short. Cut short but without shaving any of it. If I get time later I'll try to find something I like on the net and go from there.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:11, Reply)
I've been meaning to get mine cut for weeks now
never seem to find the time though
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:13, Reply)
Get some of it shaved
I reckon you could pull off this
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:14, Reply)
Argh!
An inverted monk!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:24, Reply)
X can't pull that off.
It's clearly underage.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:29, Reply)
Damn you clendrix
I've just spat soup all over my computer
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:32, Reply)
All this talk of hair
is making me wish I had more.

:(
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:54, Reply)
More trouble
Than it's worth Dok.
TGB: that kid looks like Sandy the fish spirit from Monkey.
*shows his age*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 15:58, Reply)
@ Blouse
Do a longish side fringe. This way you can grow it out if it annoys you. I find that all-one-length 'dos can be a little heavy on us beauties of a *certain* age. Just my opinion, of course.
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:01, Reply)
ooh quiet
*jiggles*
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:15, Reply)
@Grammer
More boob jiggling today? Hahaha!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:36, Reply)
I jiggle
everyday :D
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:37, Reply)
Why the fuck do I try and be helpful?
I just overheard one of the salespeople calling my boss who's away travelling asking for the network diagram of our connections to one of our clients.

Having a copy of it I offer to send it to her, now she want's a load of changes made to it so now I've got about 3 hours fucking about with visio tomorrow which I don't have time for!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:40, Reply)
*points at Bill*
Har! Har!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:47, Reply)
Damn stupid people who can't use visio properly
*Decides to start diagram from scratch tomorrow*
*Throws Laptop Out Window*
*Goes Home*

Night All!
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 17:27, Reply)
Bill
I'm surprised you've forgotten the golden rule of technical staff.

"Never, ever, ever, under any circumstances, no matter what the excuse, involve yourself with salespeople. Don't even say 'Hello' to them."

Goodness knows, I've told many salespeople to "get lost" when they try to engage me in chat about my technical knowledge....
(, Wed 25 Feb 2009, 19:34, Reply)

« Go Back | Reply To This »

Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1