once again
I find myself bored out of my mind.

naturally work is mind-numbing, but the internet is just not that interesting anymore.

I lay the blame for this solely at the feet of you, b3ta.

I suggest that the naming and shaming of individuals beings now, with many fingers being pointed.

We need some rousing arguments and slagging matches, so break out your meat-puppets (or not if you don't fancy anonymity) and slag someone off. Right now!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:23, 95 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

That PJM is such a bellend
Meat puppets?

Shit.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 26 May 2009, 13:24, Reply)

I don't know you.
But Screw You.
You utter utter twunt.


Please understand anything even vaguely nasty I say is only a joke
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 26 May 2009, 13:28, Reply)

internet lesson number one
never say something is a joke. if someone isn't smart enough to understand then they don't deserve to.

similarly, never take anything on the internet seriously, that way it doesn't matter if something is a joke or not
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:30, Reply)

See, I said she was vague

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:31, Reply)

you're not wrong
vagueness can be useful sometimes though.


more importantly, if you seriously mis-type vagueness it looks like vagina
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:32, Reply)

I like this best of all the typos

(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:35, Reply)

I read that as...
..."I don't know you, but I'd screw you"

I need more coffee today.

I can't be arsed with slagging folk off, I can't think of anyone on O/T I dislike... I have a lot of time for Bertie and find JMG quite funny.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 26 May 2009, 13:36, Reply)

it may not be what it said
but it is almost certainly true ;-)

I find JMG pretty funny also. He's been slacking off of late though. He needs to keep it fresh.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:40, Reply)

I've got bored of JMG
since I discovered he doesn't really have any bantering skillz. His character has become stale, and he really can't take a joke. I have hope he may redeem himself, but not a lot.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:45, Reply)

I have to admit I've not really tried bantering with him
I can imagine that he falls back on some stock phrases. still, better than his sycophants though
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:50, Reply)

You do end up in a recursive loop when attempting to banter with JMG
Which rapidly gets boring, so I tend to sit back and watch him try to annoy everyone else. It's quite amusing sometimes, especially if it's al or Bert.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 26 May 2009, 13:54, Reply)

I really do try my best not to get annoyed
as I am aware it's only the internet, but recently he has just stooped straight to personal attacks on me, which I find a bit irritating.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:58, Reply)

I'd noticed a couple of comments he made about you replying to his threads.
don't entirely see what the problem is, it is a message board after all.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:03, Reply)

Yeah.... Proof that even JMG takes stuff seriously.
Online.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 26 May 2009, 14:05, Reply)

it's an outrage
I do find myself getting aggravated when people are wrong, on the internet, but I'm like that in real life as well, so I don't see the problem with it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:07, Reply)

I also like the way he likes to pander to ToTT
despite pandering being so abhorrent to him anywhere else.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:08, Reply)

ToTT?
que?

edit: is it Toad of Toad Hall?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:09, Reply)

TuTT?
Edit: Top-upTheTea

I like V's one better tho.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:13, Reply)

that's the one
I can't spell today.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:16, Reply)

no idea who that is
how will I be able to go on....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:16, Reply)

slagging people off
UR Doing It Wrong!11!L!L!!1LOL
( djtrialprice, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:28, Reply)

Bugger
You did it before I had a chance to.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:37, Reply)

You're all cock gobbling felch monkeys
you only have yourselves to blame
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:28, Reply)

not specific enough I'm afraid loser
I want to see you using that anger like a fricking laser.

PJM almost has the right idea....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:29, Reply)

Vipros is a jizz gobbling arse felching monkey juggler

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:30, Reply)

getting better
it needs to be more personal though. what you've done there is taken a generic insult and stuck my name in front of it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:31, Reply)

So it would be better
to call you a lazy surf-bum, west country beardy hick then?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:35, Reply)

spot fucking on

(Bazongaloid, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:35, Reply)

I wouldn't find that particularly insulting
because that's all by choice.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:36, Reply)

Bah
I need to brush up on my insults then.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:37, Reply)

I applaud anyone
who's felched a monkey. Just so long as I don't have to make eye contact with them.
( djtrialprice, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:29, Reply)

This is how AIDS started

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:31, Reply)

so it was you!
I can just picture the tiny simian No3l, swinging from tree to tree, felching anything that moves.
( djtrialprice, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:33, Reply)

Mmmm
Bananary
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:41, Reply)

And you definitely
Shouldn't snog them.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:46, Reply)

I'd rather blame you
Especially for the use of womanly wiles in this week's /QOTW.

I really hope the next QOTW is a repeat of "The most horrible thing you've seen", so I can laugh when you post a pic of yourself in your grundies.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:31, Reply)

That was harsh
and not even true. Lab, you're on the shitlist
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:43, Reply)

It wasn't that harsh
Chillax
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:44, Reply)

Cornwall's full of cunts.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:30, Reply)

yes, yes it is
good job I live a good 50 miles from it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:31, Reply)

Ah
My heart's not in it anyway.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:32, Reply)

blur
does this make you a professional cynic?
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:37, Reply)

I'm paying the price for living life at the limit

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:43, Reply)

Not as bad as Swindon

(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:51, Reply)

before the piratey homo points it out
I hate all English people. All of them.

I only live among them so I can take their jobs and do their women.
( djtrialprice, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:36, Reply)

they hate you
particularly as I've been trying to figure out who you are and I can't
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:37, Reply)

I have recently changed my username
from djtrialprice if that helps
( djtrialprice, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:39, Reply)

aaah
that does indeed help

it confuses my poor head-brain when people change
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:47, Reply)

*waves at your head*

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:52, Reply)

Yeah, and use their accent, you cunning cad, you.
Fiendish.
(Slip Digby is a meat puppet, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:37, Reply)

How do you do?
Muh-ha-ha-ha, I have superb undercover skills!
( djtrialprice, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:38, Reply)

How do YOU do?
:)

we've me before. We both had different names then, it was a simpler time.
(Slip Digby is a meat puppet, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:02, Reply)

*sigh*
Who's this then huh? Let's be having you.
( djtrialprice, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:21, Reply)

Will a simple
CUNT suffice for everyone to be insulted by?

My heart's really not in it and I'm going out of my mind with boredom and can't be bothered to think up something better...
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:38, Reply)

Afternoon everyone
I've not been here for a while. It wasn't my fault.

I was hiking around TGB's cavernous vag and ran out of supplies at one of the base camps half way over her mountainous G-spot.

It was terrible. I was forced to eat my own arms to have enough energy to last the final few days until I found my way out.
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:38, Reply)

Did you
find your van eventually then?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:42, Reply)

Yup
It was touch and go though whether I'd got enough diesel left to make it out.
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:44, Reply)

Yeah
but he can't drive it now.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:46, Reply)

That's
what you think.

It's amazing what I can do with my teeth.
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:47, Reply)

I'd heard that.
How the devil are you?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:48, Reply)

Not bad thanks
Apart from getting biblically lost in TGB's vag, I've spent most of the last few weeks tinkering on a little road about 40 miles south of Cologne.
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:05, Reply)

not sure
whether to be horrified or appalled!
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:49, Reply)

Why not just
amused?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:57, Reply)

Go for a mix
Horrifically appalled.
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Tue 26 May 2009, 13:57, Reply)

I'd be both
It truly is horrifying that I had to sink to the appalling depths of eating my own arms, but in the face of adversity, desperate times called for desperate measures.

EDIT: They were pretty tasty after being marinated in a mixture of TGB's juices and some Reggae Reggae sauce though.
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:06, Reply)

I think you are all a bunch of filthy perverts.
Al smells of wee and Bert has a small winky.
(Jimmy Saville's bitch Is a sucker for gold jewellery, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:09, Reply)

*obeys*

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:15, Reply)

all these new names are confusing me
I saw through your clever disguise though "L3on"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:17, Reply)

You'll never guess who I am for I am She, she who must be obeyed.
.
(Jimmy Saville's bitch Is a sucker for gold jewellery, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:20, Reply)

you're Ursula Andress
AICMFP
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:23, Reply)

No.
I just look a bit like her.
(Jimmy Saville's bitch Is a sucker for gold jewellery, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:24, Reply)

You're becky
The delusions of grandeur were a dead giveaway.
(The Light in Chain not really, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:33, Reply)

Big fat fail.
I'm far more attractive than becky and I've had heaps more sex than her.
(Jimmy Saville's bitch Is a sucker for gold jewellery, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:37, Reply)

Al?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:38, Reply)

As far as I am aware Al isn't female.
Or is he a really butch dyke and I missed the signs?
(Jimmy Saville's bitch Is a sucker for gold jewellery, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:42, Reply)

It would answer a lot of niggling questions if he/she was.
.
( girlinthehole, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:45, Reply)

I prefer to say it
instead of he or she.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:46, Reply)

KGB?
A cross between BGB and TGB.
(The Light in Chain not really, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:45, Reply)

O RLY?
I go away for a nap and find someone is pretending to be better than me?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 26 May 2009, 15:14, Reply)

Damnit!
You foil me again, wily Vipros!

*jumps out of window* © Kaol 2009
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:25, Reply)

To all the people who slag off
my humongous pefectly normal sized vagina, I'd say I hope you contract a horrible STI that eats your pitiful excuses for sexual organs but I am aware that would involve actually having sex and as you are all grose deformed freakshows that manage to repel normal members of the human race that seems unlikely to happen.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:40, Reply)

and here I was hoping to use you as a hot air balloon
for a romantic trip with my long-term gf who I have sex with ;-)

wouldn't require much extra air either
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:43, Reply)

Well you
talk enough shit to inflate several balloons
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:45, Reply)

this is very true
I should hire my services out.

the inflation servives anyway, the others are free of charge
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:46, Reply)

And...
...breathe.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:49, Reply)

^This will be my next tattoo.
On my wrist.
( girlinthehole, Tue 26 May 2009, 14:50, Reply)

Erm
the whole point of the thread is to rant? So man the fuck up or fuck off
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 26 May 2009, 16:02, Reply)

I
wasn't going to mention it, but it's not possible to have my cock eaten by an STI.

My arms weren't the only thing I had to eat on my journey. The cock was hardly worth mentioning though - it was like a pepperami, only not as thick.
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Tue 26 May 2009, 15:12, Reply)

And now
It's true that you are a bit of an animal.

But which bit?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Tue 26 May 2009, 15:23, Reply)

the anus?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 15:26, Reply)

Win.

(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Tue 26 May 2009, 16:37, Reply)

RE Humongous Vagina...
It's OK - size doesn't matter. It's how you use it.

(I always wanted to say that to a girl.)
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Tue 26 May 2009, 15:32, Reply)

also allows the use of my favourite phrase ever
coined by someone on here as far as I know

it does matter if it's big, it'd be "like opening the window and fucking the night"
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 26 May 2009, 15:35, Reply)

Or
chucking a sausage up the Mall.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 26 May 2009, 15:53, Reply)

Wizards sleeve?

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 26 May 2009, 15:56, Reply)