Black Monday
Today is statistically the most depressing day of the year.
I, for one, have found no reason to disagree with this.
How about you?
(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 15:58, 88 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

My day's been alright so far, actually...

(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 15:59, Reply)

But surely.....
..that must mean statistics are untrue!
(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:00, Reply)

Well, I am always right.
Therefore I triumph over statistics.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:01, Reply)

Does that count as a superpower?

(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:02, Reply)

Statistical studies cower before what I deem to be right and proper
And with a wave of my hand, facts all across the world shift and change to concur with my opinion.

I am THE OPINIONATOR.
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:04, Reply)

No it doesn't.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:02, Reply)

I sat in the weak winter sun
and feasted on the tastiest chicken and potato pakora known to man.

Was pretty bleak first thing this morning though.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:02, Reply)

Sheffield
used up its whole sun quota for the month yesterday. Back to grey on grey today.
(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:03, Reply)

QUICKLY ! SOMEONE DO THE OLD BLAH-BLAH-PERCENT OF STATISTCS ARE ALL MADE UP JOKE !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:06, Reply)

I'm not any more depressed than usual...I'm not really depressed at all.
Wouldn't mind the day going by a bit fucking faster, mind.

Could one of you take care of that please?
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:04, Reply)

I have decreased the mass of space time in your general vicinity
Thus rendering the passage of time faster from our point of view. Unfortunatley, you will not be able to tell the difference.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:14, Reply)

jerk :'(

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:17, Reply)

That's the problem with space time
Nobody apreciates your efforts.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:20, Reply)

Right, I'm hoping for some conversation on this one, with out too much Mememmememmeme'ing.
I expect some of it, but less than the previous few threads.

I'm not quite a happy camper today, I'm not upset parsay, I'm just fed up of spending my life in a dark office while LA Fitness send another debt-collector to my door because I told them where they can stick their fucking 15 meter swimming pool, or another non-family/friend cunt asks me for some sort of IT Support in exchange for "Ooooh, yeah', you'll get lots of work through this", or some other cocksucking cunt exceeds the product brief way beyond scope and decideds once the site is down that he would like a colour-change that'll require me re-building every CSS and [image files] on the entire site, or if I want insurance on my phone and sky, yet again, really low price, Or some voice-recording phones me up yet again and tells me I've won a free holiday for a grand.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:05, Reply)

That last one drives me nuts.
How come the Telephone Preference Service lets them through? Even if you put the phone down they tie up the line for ages.

Bah! Grump.
(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:08, Reply)

And if you try to speak to them, they hang up as soon as you mention anything along the lines of "What company are you?" and "You do know I've asked sevra...."

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:11, Reply)

Gonz, you need to stop being so nice to people or shit like this happens dude.

You need to sellotape me to your chest, I'll tell them all to fuck off and give you money, even your mum. You know I would too.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:09, Reply)

Totally have plans, for starters, I've turned on the light in my office, so I'm no longer sitting in a dark office.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:14, Reply)

If only all of life's problems
were so easily solved.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:28, Reply)

Good answer.
I think we've fulfilled todays quota for boring meme based answers.
(TheColonel, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:10, Reply)

Yeah', I suppose that was a bit 'meme', but it was a big range of things that I think people can relate to.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:14, Reply)

Let me guess...
... It's been declared the most depressing day by Cliff Arnall, who has previously identified the 21^st of January as the worst day of the year.

In fact, in return for the right amount of money, he'll prove, mathematically, just about anything you want.

Am I right to detect his grubby mitts all over this non-story?
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:09, Reply)

It's just more shrug worthy news.
There's nothing else happening in the world, lets print some pointless shit.
(TheColonel, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:12, Reply)

news "news".

The scare-quotes are vitally important.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:13, Reply)

He sounds like the statistics equivalent
of AI robots taking over the world rent-a-quote nob Professor Kevin Warwick.
( djtrialprice, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:12, Reply)

Ooooh...
In which Goldacre continues the takedown of this clown...
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:15, Reply)

Wow. I would have thought the Samaritans would have been a bit more sensitive than that...
Although I think the Australian 2003 paper is missing a trick: surely all the suicides in the summer are just those who can't face any more of the endless fucking barbies...
(LongJohnBaldry, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:24, Reply)

Actually its Blue Monday
Research carried out by a company called FirstCare.
Another money for old rope job.
(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:15, Reply)

A good day here
I had a performance review at work this morning and was basically told that I am ace and to keep up the good work.

Tonight I shall be scoffing roast chicken and watching 'Them'
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:09, Reply)

The 50's B-Movie about giant ants?

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:14, Reply)

I'm afraid not
It's some French film about a couple in a holiday home getting bullied by some nasty young whippersnappers.

www.imdb.com/title/tt0465203/
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Very good film, that.

( WHARRGARBL, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:46, Reply)

s'not bad, yeah
Vicious, nasty, horrible little Rumanian bastards based on a true story and a healthy dose of scared lady in underwear running, crying and curling up into a lovely little ball of vulnerability. FNARR!!
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:56, Reply)

The influential 60s r'n'b band featuring Van Morrison?
I think they've split up, mate. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:21, Reply)

Worse news...
...Van is still releasing shit albums.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:24, Reply)

'I can only give you everything' is one of the best garage songs ever
Van's solo output is excrement in extremis. 'Moondance'? Fuck off.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:45, Reply)

Astral Weeks yes....
...everything else - no.

Moondance is utter shite and if I ever hear 'Bronze-eyed girl' again I might just grab my strap and pop a cap.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:47, Reply)

I've never heard Astral Weeks
because of all his other shit - is it ok, then?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:56, Reply)

It is worth a shot...
...will gaz you a link later.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:06, Reply)

Yes, very okay.
Tupelo Honey is also passable.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:25, Reply)

I've had a lot worse *shrugs*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:10, Reply)

I've had a really good day.

( WHARRGARBL, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:17, Reply)

Nice one tits

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:19, Reply)

Ha!
*high fives*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:20, Reply)

Boo-YAH!

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:20, Reply)

have you, Titters?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:19, Reply)

I just woke up, it's only 8.20 am
I'll let you know later.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:19, Reply)

My day has not been depressing.
It has, however, been quite shit. I can only hope that the new season of 24 can brighten it somewhat.
(ConanTroutman thought we would free the vulture, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:25, Reply)

I received a message this morning
Telling me that one of my best friends has committed suicide.

The guy who sent it to me has a long running vendetta against the girl in question, and signed it off with a smiley face, so I think he's bullshitting.

Unfortunately, I've also been unable to contact her to disprove him. I've left a couple of messages, but she's not getting back to me at all. She rarely has credit, so I don't know what to think of this.

I'm starting to get really worried now. If she hasn't contacted me before I finish work, I'll contact the police where she is, ask if there's been an incident that matches what he's said.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:26, Reply)

Either way, that guy is a massive cunt
before you call the police, is there anyone else who would know?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:31, Reply)

Unfortunately not
She doesn't have any contact with her school mates anymore, and that's how I knew her.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:54, Reply)

Oh dear
That's not good.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:32, Reply)

Any word mate?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:20, Reply)

None at all
I'm going to give her a call as soon as everyone else is out of the office.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:23, Reply)

No.
Today I didn't even have to use my A.K.

Plus nobody I know got killed in South Central L.A.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:28, Reply)

did some bee-hatch
also confirm you're the top gun?
( djtrialprice, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:33, Reply)

Indeed..
In fact I even saw the lights of the Goodyear Blimp and it read, "Dr Tugnut is a pimp"
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:36, Reply)

terrible record from a man capable of genius.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:34, Reply)

What do you think of the rest of the album "The Predator"?

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:36, Reply)

Very much of the time...
...but I still like it.

'Amerikkka...' was great though.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:39, Reply)

Not as good as 'Lethal Injection'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:42, Reply)

I love...
...'Cave Bitch'.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:44, Reply)

That whole record is fucking brilliant.
The Lench Mob stuff from the same time was equally good.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:46, Reply)

I will give it a go
I have all his albums on my i-spod
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:50, Reply)

If you don't already have it
Redman's 'Whut? Thee Album' is also well worth a go, from the same era.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:03, Reply)

Hahaha!
"Oh Redman...I have a jacuzzi..."
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:07, Reply)

I saw him at the Forum just a bit later than that
I had a ticket, my mate was on the list - except he wasn't, so my cheerful 'I'll see you in there' proved over optimistic. So I saw the whole show on my own - it was fucking brilliant.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:11, Reply)

Fuck, I'm still alive?
Dammit!
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:34, Reply)

And thank Cheesus for that....

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:45, Reply)

Only 40 miles from
South Central LA, so yeah, I guess if I don't go up there I won't get shot at!
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:53, Reply)

Rubbish, Rubbish, Rubbish Day
I had a note from a consultant friend of mine who advised that a patient who I've had for years he's finally diagnosed with a class four malignancy in her lung, metastasing to her breast.

Despite the fact that this is an unusual diagnosis, I've been on a house call this afternoon to sit with her and talk with her.

The lovely lady (not out of her 50s yet) in question is astonishingly stoic in her consideration of this. When I told her the news her reaction was (and I quote) "Oh well".

Have just sat in my office and had a small cry. God bless Macmillan nurses.
(Medical_Male Say aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:33, Reply)

My mum loved the MacMillan nurses.
She said they were awesome. She was also (finally) diagnosed with class four lung cancer, metastasing to her lymph nodes, jaw and mouth.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:37, Reply)

Not going to moan about my day after this...

I honestly couldn't work in medicine for this reason, it would leave me too down.

A friend of mine works with kids with lukeamia, don't know how she does it.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:44, Reply)

Kids?
I'm in *awe* of anyone who works in PaedOnc (kids cancer) - I simply couldn't do it.
(Medical_Male Say aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:09, Reply)

What you said.
I have a friend that's a pediatric nurse and some of the stories she has to tell are heart wrenching.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:33, Reply)

Yes, today is a shit day
See my post this morning.

At least we've got the Dog Warden coming out tomorrow - apparently they've visited before as the neighbours' dogs keep getting out.

I've got a vaguely upset stomach and I've got to go into work tomorrow for a meeting and I won't get paid for it.

And to top it all I fucking hate being grumpy and miserable - I'm a cheery optimistic person.

*Note to self - MTFU*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:46, Reply)

I'm working on MingTFU now

As I've got to go and win the pub quiz again tonight.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 16:50, Reply)

Here
*hands some refuse sacks*
I hope these will offer some recompense and also make your heart dance.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:13, Reply)

Well I'm fucked off
I've spent the last two years doing numerous Exchange Management courses getting myself up to speed with all the new Exchange Server tools ect with a plan to apply for the exchange managers job that I know is going to be advertised soon so I can go up a pay grade.

I arrived this morning to find I can no longer log on the the Exchange servers. When I questioned management as to why I can't do my job they told me they had "streamlined the amount of users that can log on to the Exchange servers to improve security" Unless I can make them change their minds I may have to look for another job. I'm pretty sure they have done the dirty on me.
( Peej, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:01, Reply)

*exchanges*

(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:07, Reply)

*does dumbells*

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:15, Reply)

POTD
*applause*



*also exchanges*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:17, Reply)

Today I saw some buds on trees
and it's only January.
I think I'm slowly emerging out of my January fog.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:05, Reply)

Some fucker stole our Christmas tree.
I had it in the woodshelter so I could use it as kindling and I came home today and it's gone. I know the recycling guys were round today collecting expired trees but to get ours they would've had to been noseying in the front yard, walked in through the gate, and hauled it out from under the very obvious woodshelter. That doesn't sound like council employee behaviour to me - it's much too much like hard work. Whoever it was left the pallets and the chopped up pallet kindling.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:30, Reply)

Hmmm
If I were a firewood thief (which I'm not, honest) I would take the easier stuff, like the pallets...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:32, Reply)

I think I'm a victim of over-zealous recycling.
This neighbourhood is full of eco-cunts and now the binmen are in on it too.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:37, Reply)

Sounds more like the work of gypos to me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 17:39, Reply)

This will explain why today I
mostly sat with the 1000 yard stare considering my future. Then I came home and all is peachy.
(Starvis something for the weekend sir?, Mon 18 Jan 2010, 18:12, Reply)