That thread is rubbish

I have Friday off, I live in London and have no money.

What shall I do after visiting St.Pauls cathedral to scream the Lords prayer whilst wankning and crying?

ALT Q: Would you rather be blind, deaf or Autistic?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:19, 92 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

You have to pay to get into St. Paul's, don't you?

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:21, Reply)

With your soul.
Yes, you do.
British Museum is free admission and great place for eye-flirting. Which can lead to interesting places if you're free and single. Or even reasonably priced and single.

Dumb. Easiest to overcome.edit - which wasn't an option. Bugger. Deaf then.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:22, Reply)

Save up £4.50 and get a chorizo sandwich from Borough market
then go and rape all the stall holders for their tasty cheese and chilli bread
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:21, Reply)

Why spend the £4.50?
If your appetite's not as big as mine, I'm sure it's possible to scavenge a decent lunch out of free samples.
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:22, Reply)

You wont get chorizo otherwise

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:23, Reply)

This is true.
On balance, it's probably worth stumping up the £4.50...but that leaves me £4.50 less to fritter away at the beer stall...
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:24, Reply)

Fuck beer, chorizo is your god now.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:36, Reply)

But I love them both...beer...spicy sausage...can't I have both?
DON'T MAKE ME CHOOSE!
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:38, Reply)

There's only one way
to find out which is best naturally
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:13, Reply)

What becky says
but also fork out for a flat white from the Monmouth Coffee Co.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:30, Reply)

chorizo
is overrated
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:02, Reply)

probably deaf
as it is least disabling. would be a bugger not to be able to hear music though.

maybe blind. would be a bugger not being able to read ordinary books though. or surf. or drive.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:21, Reply)

Pr0n?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:22, Reply)

It must be possible to convert ASCII porn to braille

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:23, Reply)

I'd rather be autistic I think
I understand there's some kind of support group online for that.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:23, Reply)

Welcome,
but DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:31, Reply)

gnnnnnnnnnnnnnnaaaaaaaaaaaa

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:34, Reply)

Only if its crippling and undiagnosed.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:39, Reply)

It's definitely crippling
but it's been diagnosed by me and at least two of my friends from WoW and Second Life.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:50, Reply)

Oh well, in that case,
Come on in. But only if you've not got anything orange.

NO ORANGE!
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:53, Reply)

damn I can't think of anything to be weird about
I genuinely don't like sellotape sticking to me, or cling film for that matter, that can be my thing.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:01, Reply)

All the threads are ruibbish
Because I haven't been here
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:33, Reply)

are you wearing your underwear on the oustide with your cape flowing behind you?
EDIT: Sorry, someone is bound to strike through that
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:35, Reply)

All the threads are a South African red tea?

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:39, Reply)

ha
I quite like that
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:40, Reply)

Isn't there varying degrees of autism?
So rather than be blind or deaf, can I just have mild autism...y'know, a lack of empathy with my fellow human beings and a tendancy to seek my own company.

Oh wait, that's just me.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:39, Reply)

Yes, they call it the Autistic Spectrum.
If you're "autistic" then you're on the high end of the spectrum.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:44, Reply)

Yep.
You can be extremely high functioning (capable of interraction, highly intelligent but with little comprehension of other people's emotions, etc) extremely low functioning (no speech, unable to look after yourself at all and so on) or with varying degrees in between. And then there's QOTW.

There's a new series called Young, Autistic and Stagestruck which shows a real mix of people on the spectrum.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:49, Reply)

Young, Autistic and Stagestruck /talk
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:59, Reply)

Was Colonel Grey autistic then?
He was high up in Spectrum.

*Awaits spang*
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:51, Reply)

Sorry I'm under 30.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:51, Reply)

Ha!

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:52, Reply)

Mug.
Eh? was the correct response.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:53, Reply)

Eh? Wouldn't have been nearly cutting enough.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:54, Reply)

Yes but by replying as you did you implied you understood the reference.
Fail!
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:58, Reply)

You've a point there, Porkles old bean.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:04, Reply)

Pork and beans, pork and beans!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:06, Reply)

That's quite enough, 'Rain Man'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:07, Reply)

I'll buy you some beers

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 14:53, Reply)

Your generosity brings a tear to my jaded eye.
Unless of course it's crap beer just to make him suffer more.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:01, Reply)

If this isn't a euphamism for bumming then you may be on
I have since this thread started been roped into cooking in the eveing so will have to do some shopping so I can do showing off cooking!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:02, Reply)

ah crap
my turn tonight, and as I have just started a diet, and there is only chicken in the house, my options are seriously limited
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:05, Reply)

Seeing as you cannot spell 'euphemism'
I am retracting my offer. Someone might spot us and think I'm friends with remedials. I could pretend to be your carer, though, I suppose.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:05, Reply)

You can forgive me one letter?

I am multi tasking by writing a 50 slide power point slide at present, it's really boring.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:08, Reply)

No.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:11, Reply)

Fine, well if you change your mind I'll be under the arches in Waterloo
with a bottle of White Ice and some crack.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:15, Reply)

Hey -
I didn't say you could come round 'my place'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:23, Reply)

Now I know why you won't visit me.
It's my awful grammer isn't it.
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Yes, that and your spelling.

EDIT alt answer: I've never even met your grandmother but I bet she's not as awful as all that.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:09, Reply)

Well at least it's something that is important to you and not some frivilous thing that puts you off.

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:11, Reply)

Like your enormous tits

(Bazongaloid, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:15, Reply)

Exactly!

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:16, Reply)

'frivolous'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:18, Reply)

ha!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Bugger!

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:24, Reply)

I have Friday off as well
I'm going to lovely Brussels to have litres of lovely Beer.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:00, Reply)

Brussels?
don't forget to visit the Chip Museum...
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:04, Reply)

chip peadophile
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:04, Reply)

you went there?
tourist bus didn't stop for some reason
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:05, Reply)

I went there oh yes remeber

no windows was my idea!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:07, Reply)

Chip Museum
is in Bruges, and I'm not going again to that infested with tourists little city.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:11, Reply)

that's how insignificant Bruges was on my holiday in Belgium
I didn't even remember that.

I do remember the Atomium was a MASSIVE waste of time
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Yes, it is
Unless you are super lucky and the day you decide to go there is a Spanish fair, with food, wine, cider, dancing. Ay, it was like being at home.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:27, Reply)

haha
I went two years ago, after I'd become used to living here - first night in Brussels - we went to a Tapas bar for dinner...
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:28, Reply)

Well done
I love eating tapas. Not so much for the food itself, but for how it's done. Going to one bar, order some beer or wine and a little bite. And then another bar and do the same. And again and again until you can't walk anymore.

If you like tapas, you should go to Granada. You order your drink and get the food for free. Cheapest holidays ever.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:31, Reply)

i might just do that actually
the tapas were quite crap though, so not really worth it.

There's a great steak restaurant at one end of that shopping street, but damned if i remember what it was called
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:35, Reply)

I think we'll go for the mussels
Mmmmm... mussels...

If you go to Granada, let me know and I'll tell you a couple of things about it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:37, Reply)

Mussels look like fannies
and smell worse
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:44, Reply)

But you like fannies
Don't you?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:45, Reply)

he's a bummer
don't you know.
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:58, Reply)

Again?

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:05, Reply)

Yes!
I love Brussels, and we have little secret plans for the future, so we thought we should pay a visit to the Beer Country and get pissed.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Little secret plans?
*gets excited*
( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:09, Reply)

Little, little and secret, secret
I'm a lot more excited than him, but that's the usual.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:11, Reply)

GAZ ME NOW!!!!!

( girlinthehole, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:12, Reply)

Deaf
I'd miss music but I'd miss reading normal books more
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:14, Reply)

normal?!
You're so unPC, I'm shocked and appalled.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:17, Reply)

I feel a little bit bad
but not much.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:20, Reply)

there's braille in my lift
and I always run my fingers over it to see what it would be like, but I can't fathom how they 'read' like that, it seems so difficult.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:48, Reply)

read brail you blind basterd!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:18, Reply)

are you absolutely sure
you don't comment on the Daily Mail?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:20, Reply)

of course not
he writes for it
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:24, Reply)

I am a Daily Mail Mod
If the comment isn't inflammatory towards white middle class morons then I randomly add in some of the following:
Immigrants
Gypsies
Pedos
Gypsie Pedos
Nu-Labour
Tony Bliar
Tony Bliar Pedos
China plates of Tony Bliar Pedos
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:24, Reply)

do the China plates
rub off to show the Diana picture underneath?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:26, Reply)

Multi-layered
Cliff, then Dando, then Diana
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:27, Reply)

God I've created a Hydra headed fucktard!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:28, Reply)

I like to call it
the Gift that Gives Several Times
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:38, Reply)

Gives what though?
That's the question
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:40, Reply)

well it's the Daily Mail
therefore CANCER
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:43, Reply)

I've been deaf.
It's not really that terrible. Couldn't do without my sight, though.

(The deafness was temporary, brought on by an infection. It was more annoying than crippling.)
( Wanderer, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 15:43, Reply)

Autistic
cos you can get away with apretty much any behaviour.
(kitescreech still here, Wed 14 Apr 2010, 22:07, Reply)

Fucking Autists!
Bastards have now started tearing pages out of their books and throwing them out of the upstairs windows AND INTO MY GARDEN! It looks like it has been raining janet and john or whatever shit they don't like now. Buggers!
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 14 Apr 2010, 22:16, Reply)