/OT I need your help
I know you are all chock full of sartorial wisdom and as such you should furnish me with your views on what sort of shoes I should wear with this suit:

www.b3tards.com/u/48ca4e4a50b7cad28251/dscf1703.jpg

also: Lab, you are a bastard
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:29, 130 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Why am I a bastard?
and Doc Martens.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:30, Reply)

because I suspect you are the croissant culprit
care to elaborate? colour, number of holes etc.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:31, Reply)

Wasn't that like a week or two ago?
I didn't do that, merely retraced their steps to see how easy it was.

You could go 8 hole, black, or if you're feeling brave then 16 hole.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:33, Reply)

yeah
fair enough
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

One hole is enough for me.
I'm not greedy or fussy, beggers'n'choosers'n'what-not.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:03, Reply)

In other irrelivent Near The Topping news.
I got dennied my usual medical treatment today on grounds of funding, SAD FACE, I kindda need this stuff to live a normal life and what-not, and if I go to long without it I build up anti bodys which means the stuff becomes ineffective and it's all a funding issue which is really really shit but I should get funding in the next month which'll be OK but I'll be not very well for the next month which is shit.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:06, Reply)

What's wrong?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:08, Reply)

So many things, NakedApe, so many things.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:09, Reply)

Fair enough, good luck then!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:24, Reply)

I was just goig to suggest Docs.
Maybe a simple Chelsea boot design; comfy as fuck.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:31, Reply)

part of my dilemma is that it's too light in colour to look good with shiny black shoes
and people tend to frown at grey suit and brown shoes, which is how I've worn it before, as I have some nice tan boots.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:33, Reply)

Then don't go for shiny black leather
go for the softer matt black. Or even possibly suedey ones if you're going somewhere more casual
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

this is sensible
I found a pair of boots online that I liked, unfortunately the price tag was up near £400, which is more than the suit
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:37, Reply)

Ouch
I can have a quick look if you want?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:39, Reply)

if you've got nothing better to do then that would be welcome thanks

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:40, Reply)

I was at a wedding recently where one of the groomsmen
wore fake New Rocks. If that was my wedding I would be livid.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:39, Reply)

heh
mine's going to be pretty informal. aside from me dressing like a victorian gent I don't really care what anyone else goes for.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:40, Reply)

I just want all my boys to look nice
and make a bit more effort than they would on a normal night out. If that means suits and shoes then so be it. I also don't want Wiggy to get all shy about wearing a full on suit and waistcoat, etc, if all his mates are going to be wearing jeans and trainers.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:43, Reply)

there will be suits at mine, no question
but that's because all the people involved already have nice suits.

can't be fucked with this hiring matching outfits business
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:45, Reply)

What if they were real new rocks?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:43, Reply)

still not ok.
They're too huge and clumpy to go with a suit, they just look horrible.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:44, Reply)

Fair enough
I know exactly nothing about looking smart and/or dressing formally.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:49, Reply)

that's because you're a scummy student.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:01, Reply)

although to be fair
you looked very nice at my party. Very rock chic.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:02, Reply)

Thank you :)
That is the look I go for.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:35, Reply)

The ones I got for my wedding
whilst black, were more matt than shiny. Then again, I was wearing black trousers so a different colour probably wouldn't have worked.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:44, Reply)

the sort of shoes that are made out of a comb some scissors and a razor
you scruffy fuck.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:31, Reply)

that made me laugh more than it should've done

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:32, Reply)

your head looks like a hairy lightbulb

(PsychoChomp, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

it is a hairy lightbulb

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

Is that you?
You look a lot like my cousin.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:32, Reply)

it is indeed
according to most people I look like someone they know
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:33, Reply)

Wow!
I suddenly feel like huging you. I haven't seen him for a long time, stupid family feuds.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:35, Reply)

It is your cousin
Vipros is stealing his suit.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

My cousin would never wear anything like that
He's got long rastas (sp? you now, long strings of hair, grelos or something like that)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:37, Reply)

dreadlocks

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:38, Reply)

Thank you
I like rastas more, but I don't get to choose, do I?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:43, Reply)

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:33, Reply)

this is winning so far

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

I have a pair
they're awesome.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

I do too
But the nails are black, for gorilla feet.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:35, Reply)

mine are too,
maybe mine are supposed to be gorilla ones. I like to think of them as werewolf though.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:38, Reply)

To you they can be werewolf

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:49, Reply)

I'm a kittywolf!
rar.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:02, Reply)

are you my cat?
it's like a kittywolf - only bites at night
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:24, Reply)

That made me laugh so much!

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

officelolz

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:35, Reply)

depends where to
details? Or just around?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:33, Reply)

weddings, including my own

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:34, Reply)

I've gazzed you some ideas

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:53, Reply)

Black shiney ones
you cant go wrong
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:35, Reply)

I don't think they look good with a lightish grey suit

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:36, Reply)

I've exhausted my knowledge of shoes.
Finished "Gateway". I liked it, but it didnt give me weird dreams.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:40, Reply)

that's a shame
I've not had any weird dreams since I finished it I think
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:41, Reply)

am I just slowly converting the board to this book?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:42, Reply)

Oh, it's all your fault is it?
I didnt like the odds in the book:
80% Return without a find
5% Return with a find
15% Don't return

And even if your ship makes it back, you may still be dead/horribly injured.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:45, Reply)

Yeah
but what an adrenaline rush stepping aboard for the first time
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:53, Reply)

If it were me, there would be a rush
but of the brown stinky kind
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:56, Reply)

Grey converse
Or something in snakeskin, maybe cowboy boots.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:36, Reply)

I have these
www.scorpioshoes.com/mens-2/boots-6/western-cowboy-43/caterpillar-vinson-p710476-mens-lengendary-rugged-10104-3256_zoom.jpg
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:37, Reply)

Cool but too brown to match

( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:38, Reply)

how about
christianlouboutinsaks.com/christian-louboutin-cotton-club-120-wedges-p-378.html
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:42, Reply)

hot

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:44, Reply)

Burgundy leather.
Burgundy leather shoes are brilliant.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:38, Reply)

now that is an idea that has merit

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:39, Reply)

www.samuel-windsor.co.uk/Admin/otherpics/Large/BV09_Main.jpg
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:47, Reply)

hmmm
like the colour, but not so much the style of those
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:57, Reply)

www.clarks.co.uk/find/product-is-20332101?cm_mmc=gbase-_-a-_-b-_-c
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:01, Reply)

better ta
I have noticed that brogues are not cheap. I thought this was just because I'd only seen expensive ones, but no, even Clarks are pretty expensive
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:02, Reply)

At least they're not £200 odd quid.
Probably one of the cheapest you'll find if you want good quality leather.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:04, Reply)

that is very true

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:05, Reply)

With shoes you almost always get what you pay for.
This is how I can justify spending large amounts of money on the heels I want
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:06, Reply)

kind of right
I go through shoes fast, so mostly wear stuff like Duffs and Etnies that I've bought online or from TK Maxx for £20.

my Cat boots, which I linked below were £110, but well worth it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:08, Reply)

Nice Adidas Sambas
would look just fab.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:38, Reply)

brogues

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:40, Reply)

two tone?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:41, Reply)

Actually, this.
I love a man in brogues.
Especially a man in brogue doc martens.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:43, Reply)

I haven't thought that far
I just saw plain brogues. You should wear brogues.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:44, Reply)

Burgundy brogues!
Two-for-one
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:48, Reply)

if only these didn't have white soles
present-london.com/trickers/burgundy-brogue-boot/

(and weren't £300)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:52, Reply)

Colour them in with a brown marker pen.
Sorted.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:53, Reply)

Cuprinol!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:58, Reply)

WHITE ONES
I love white shoes.

Honestly, I have no idea. I would have said black but you've said no black. Hmmph.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:43, Reply)

I think I should clarify that
and make it no shiny black
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:43, Reply)

I second this
i have white smart shoes and they're fucking awesome.
(beanojam isn't really Ricardo Flange, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:47, Reply)

I have...hmm...3 pairs of white shoes?
My amazing, hardy, vommagnet DMs, white ones with studs, oh and make that 4 as I have two pairs of white trainery type that aren't trainers, just slipper type if that makes sense.

No, of course it doesn't. White laceups.
WHAT MY BRAIN IS DEAD
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:49, Reply)

i have just the one
they are my wedding shoes. so far i've only worn them 3 times...

i only have one (blue) suit and i didn't think brown or black would go with that.
(beanojam isn't really Ricardo Flange, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:51, Reply)

Slightly off subject.
but every time you go up or down stairs, Leonardo's knob is at eye level.

Something to live up to I suppose.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:43, Reply)

it's actually quite reassuring
because the knob is quite small

used to be at the end of the bed in my old flat
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:44, Reply)

Its 500 years old too, but its better than mine.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:45, Reply)

I second the matt black chelsea boot suggestion
or maybe winklepickers.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:44, Reply)

have you got a bird in your hair? I swear I see a wing...
I reckon some sort of pump?
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:46, Reply)

These
img01.bizrate-images.com/resize?sq=220&uid=1909190154

They even go with your tie.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:46, Reply)

no no
astore.amazon.com/shoes0e2-20/images/B000PHN5A0

purple goes great with grey
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:48, Reply)

I like those.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:50, Reply)

I only did a random google search
But so do I actually. They look like they're probably Bordello.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:51, Reply)

I'm going to watch poledancers tonight
but it's for charity so it's not pervy.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:52, Reply)

What charity is that for?
Bet they're not as good as me and Kitty.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:54, Reply)

Cancer reasearch I think,
it's meant to be a pink party, but I don't own anything pink.

Oh they're doing it outside aparently, it'll end in tears.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:56, Reply)

Don't lie.
Argh, that mean they'll be using the free standing ones. I hate those, they wobble like fuck.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:59, Reply)

I might have a tie,
but I doubt it.

I think there are some flag poles? can they use them?
(PsychoChomp, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:01, Reply)

I bet you've got at least two dresses.
Erm, I honestly don't know. Possibly too thick...? I wouldn't like to try it.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:05, Reply)

that's what she said.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:45, Reply)

Well done, you're getting the hang of it now.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:35, Reply)

Seriously though,
Brothel Creepers and a DA for the haircut you scruffy urchin.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:47, Reply)

purple suede winkle-pickers.

( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:59, Reply)

Shoes made from fox poo.
They'll crumble off so your feet won't get too hot and due to the aroma you won't need to wear aftershave. Win win. Also no bastard will sit next to you, so you won't have to hear about uncle frubert's colostomy operation again.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 16:59, Reply)

thanks for the useful advice there ;-)

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:11, Reply)

Hahaha
Your link is banned from my work internet... can you describe it?
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:11, Reply)

lightish grey single breasted, three piece

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:12, Reply)

Hmmm...
that's a toughie if you don't want to wear black. White would make you look like a pimp (unless its some sort of pimpin' affair that you are attending). You could look for some charcoal shoes, somewhere between black and grey... have you tried Next... they have some cool mens shoes on the cheap!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:16, Reply)

I will check them out
thanks
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:19, Reply)

DiT
got some wicked ones that are black with red tips... they're fancy!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:20, Reply)

cool :-)
I really quite like these
www.next.co.uk/shopping/men/shoesandboots/15/6?extra=sch&n=men
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:23, Reply)

These are too awful for words

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:32, Reply)

Pah
and
blurgh
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:33, Reply)

They are skinny down syndrome shoes

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:35, Reply)

You're a skinny down syndrome shoe!

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:36, Reply)

'I like this'

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:37, Reply)

Oooh they're a bit snazzy!
See... good shoes! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:33, Reply)

Keep it simple.
If you're going for a dark color, you want something slim and long otherwise they will look too clumpy with a light suit. Maybe something like;

www.asos.com/Oliver-Sweeney-London/Oliver-Sweeney-London-Colnaghi-Toe-Cap-Derby-Shoes/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=1106954&cid=5773&sh=0&pge=2&pgesize=20&sort=-1&clr=Black

If you go for a lighter colour, avoid anything too light and stick with something that isn't too shiney/patent leather.

The other option would be feature shoes - a BRIGHT colour and then find a matching tie with white shirt or matching shirt with black tie.

I'd give more examples but still at work. Hope it helps.
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:24, Reply)

nice ideas
thanks
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:28, Reply)

This is the best option so far

Please, though, whatever you choose, keep two things in mind:

1. Don't buy anything too trendy, a suit is a classic look and while it can be modern it should be treated with respect.
2. Never, ever, EVER where shoes with squares toes.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:35, Reply)

I'm after a quite vintage look
and am generally not overly keen on most smart shoes that most people wear. I wear some brown suede boots to work, which are not smart in the least. I've got some DM Chelsea style boots in shiny black, but they are quite school shoeish.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:23, Reply)

Yeah i have a pair of matt brown shoes taht I love, but I can't find a way to "polish" them matt
They are a bit scuffed and need cleaning up.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:30, Reply)

that's a bugger
my two pairs of good boots don't really require cleaning as one pair is worn tan leather anyway, and the other needs to be scruffy because they look like boots for crushing skulls
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:49, Reply)

Don't know if I missed the thread
but these are pretty matte out of the box and really good quality.

www.underground-cybershop.co.uk/acatalog/steel_cap_boots.html
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 17:36, Reply)

I like the bat ones

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 3 Jun 2010, 18:41, Reply)

A decent pair of matt black lizard or ostrich skin cowboy boots.
Preferably with silver tips and ankle\instep chain.

Show some style.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 3 Jun 2010, 19:05, Reply)

decent range here that should match the suit..
www.jeffery-west.co.uk/jefferywest/shoes.asp

they do wicked belts and canes and stuff too.
( TheFinch is getting to grips with the complex plane on, Fri 4 Jun 2010, 8:13, Reply)