I'm really sorry about this
www.virginmoneygiving.com/martinandclaire

I have to ask everyone I've ever met cos we've only got 3 weeks to get sponsored. Please feel free to ignore the above, or call me a twat in the replies.

What's the most unlikely thing you've ever done to raise money? Not necessarily for charity. Could be for beer.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:00, 148 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

spammer

(PsychoChomp, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:01, Reply)

and hassle me after glastonbury
I'll be in a good mood.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:02, Reply)

You lucky bastard
I absolutely will, by way of petty revenge
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:05, Reply)

I kissed a girl for $3

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:03, Reply)

katy perry did it for more.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:04, Reply)

she's a proper whore

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:05, Reply)

McFly covered that.
Thus leading me to a deep philosophical debate about which one of Katy Perry or anyone from McFly is actually more likely to have ever kissed a girl.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:53, Reply)

Chompy once kissed a girl for a promise.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:04, Reply)

I'm unimpressed by lack of photos here

( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)

I'm sorry but I have to spend all my money on cocaine.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:04, Reply)

I'm happy to take payment in cocaine

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:06, Reply)

What time are you expecting to do?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:09, Reply)

Good question
I could do it in under an hour. Ms Foxtrot, as yet, cannot. But she's training hard enough to change that. I'll just be happy with a sunny day to do it on. And for England not to be in the World Cup Final, as I'll have to miss the first half if they are
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:12, Reply)

OK
I'll put £10 on it, and extra £10 if you do it in under 53min. There you have a challenge.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:20, Reply)

That would be amazingly generous of you
on both counts. I mean it's generous to think I could run 10k in 53 minutes!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:23, Reply)

Oh, that's why I asked what's your ideal time
If it's too hard then just take 1 min from your best time and tell me how much it is.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)

Actually 53 minutes is probably doable, but not too easy
so it's perfect :-)
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:36, Reply)

Good luck then
And don't push too hard at the begining or you won't make it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)

Thank you :-)

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)

I shaved off my beard
for £230
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:10, Reply)

How much?!!
That must have been a hell of a beard
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:13, Reply)

it was for charity
and it wasn't as good as the beard I have now. was about 3 years old though.

I'd never do it again. I didn't recognise myself for 2 weeks.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:14, Reply)

Try not to get too stoned and pass out while I'm around at Sonisphere, eh mate

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:17, Reply)

aside from the fact that I've passed out from booze/drugs maybe twice in my life
if you were to come near it with scissors/razor I would destroy you.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:20, Reply)

As a former long-haired hippy type
who lived with the constant threat of scalping at University, I can assure you that any such threat would be empty

I'd like to see you try to destroy me though
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:24, Reply)

normally I am far too mild-mannered
but if my beard or hair were to be tampered with I suspect there would be an element of turning green and tearing all clothes apart from a convenient pair of shorts
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:25, Reply)

This is a bit eyeless-in-gaza. innit?

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:29, Reply)

I imagine that a fight between us would be a pathetically hilarious affair

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:32, Reply)

I suspect you are right

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:34, Reply)

and immensely gay

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)

You suspect that the fight would be immensely gay?
Or you suspect that I am immensely gay, as well as right? Answer carefully
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:38, Reply)

well
I was thinking more the fight itself. But I can call you gay if you feel you haven't reached your minimum insult quotient this week yet
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:41, Reply)

It's unlikely that I won't be insulted again today though, isn't it?
Also, you calling me gay does very little for your opinion of your own appearance
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:44, Reply)

that doesn't make much sense to me
have I missed something?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)

Nothing of note
But if Amberl calls me gay she should expect any future compliments I give her to be a double-edged sword
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)

I suspect Amberl gets enough compliments that she'll survive.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:15, Reply)

subtle pandering there
nice work
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:19, Reply)

Subtle?
Really?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:23, Reply)

Comparatively, yes.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:32, Reply)

Of course she does - bloody gorgeous that girl.
Lovely big brown eyes.

There's subtlety, look you.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:24, Reply)

I very nearly pandertroned myself for that one.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:32, Reply)

Did you have
this sort of thing in mind?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:00, Reply)

I might sponser you
if you'll run in a pink tutu, wearing a sign saying 'I'm a bumder and I'll do anything for money'.
That's a reasonable request.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:22, Reply)

Is it good enough to say I did it in a pink tutu?
Or will I be besieged by a chorus of "pictures or it didn't happen?"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:25, Reply)

Are you suggesting lying on the interweb?
Fie on you.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:28, Reply)

Absolutely not
*uncrosses fingers*

If I thought that a pciture of me sweating my arse off whilst running in a pink tutu would encourage people to sponsor me then I'd do it. However I think it's more likely to encourage people to rip their eyes from their sockets, and sue me for it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)

I don't think that charity is one that fits into my ethos, sorry.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:41, Reply)

You have an ethos?
Where can I get one of those?
( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)

They're quite easy to make.
You think up a load of stuff, come to conclusions based on them, and there you go !
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:47, Reply)

I should stress that I'm not trying to change your mind here
but I am intrigued as to what charities do fit into your ethos
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:43, Reply)

Same as everyone else, the ones that are close to home, or at least, closer to home.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:46, Reply)

Can't argue with that
Disappointingly
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)

A character from my youth
sucked a dog's cock for a wrap of speed.

Only to be told that said wrap of speed did not, in fact, exist.

For this and for many, many other reasons I consider the fellow to be a complete cunt. I mean - speed? Please.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:45, Reply)

dear god

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)

That is fucking hilarious
Genuinely

Although it does raise the question, what would you need to be promised to suck a dog's cock? Do you have a sliding scale of drugs to animals? Is there another creature whose cock you'd suck in exchange for a lower-quality drug?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:49, Reply)

fairly sure I wouldn't suck any animal's dick
for any drugs
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:50, Reply)

^ this is of course my real answer.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)

Frankly I prefer your first
You're lucky this isn't Mastermind
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)

There should be more questions like
'what drugs would you need to be promised to suck a dog's cock?' on Mastermind, if you ask me.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:53, Reply)

If The Weakest Link goes well I plan to follow in my father's footsteps and go on Mastermind next
I'll make my specialist subject "the crazy ramblings of Monty Boyce", if you like
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)

For two trips and a dab of mephedrone I'd blow a diseased camel.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:50, Reply)

FFS!
The worst thing I ever did for a wrap of speed was make someone dinner.
( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:51, Reply)

That's WEIRD
When I'm on speed the last thing I want is dinner
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:53, Reply)

Speedpiss.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)

Sorry about that

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:57, Reply)

It was before we went out.

( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:56, Reply)

I don't think I would enjoy speed.
I think I would really enjoy smack though, that stuff cirtainly sounds like it feels good.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)

It's fucking terrible stuff Gonz (speed*).
The worst drug out of the traditional canon. I tried heroin once but (luckily, I think) I did it wrong and it burned up in the air rather than me actually smoking it.


*all the downsides of drug-taking and terribly bad for you but with no real noticable effect save hyperactivity. Great. Makes your teeth fall out and strips calcium from your stomach lining too.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:55, Reply)

I agree Monty.
But it made me dance like a loon all night.
( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:57, Reply)

I don't think I would like any kind of 'upper', beyond a can of red bull.
I probably need it more than most, with my loldrugz and all that, that it would put me on an even-keel or something, but I like being all chilled out and relaxed, and hate anxiety.

Some people said that I should do weed as a painkiller too, but I really don't like the effect weed has on me, or on others, and the smell really stands out for me.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:03, Reply)

I can't really cope with anything stronger than a cup of coffee nowadays without getting jittery.

( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:06, Reply)

Amateurs. Pah!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)

I'm glad.
I paid my dues and now I'm high on life. (Well slowly getting there).
( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:09, Reply)

weed isn't for everyone
works wonders for me though :-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:08, Reply)

Mate - my ex paid me for babysitting on Friday
with some polm and some Mexican Ice (reputed to be the strongest hashish on earth) which her landlord brought back from Holland 2 days ago.

Jesus fucking Christ it's pokey.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:11, Reply)

excellent
I got some green the other day from a different source than usual. had a spliff of my normal stuff one evening. had a single skin of the new stuff an hour or so later and could hardly walk afterwards.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:18, Reply)

Sometimes
I think you can become accustomed to the hit if you're smoking one particular strain for a while. When you switch to a new one it seems fucking nuts but that can wear off after a while – then you can go back to the old one and rediscover its majesty. Everyone’s happy.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:21, Reply)

a change is as good as a rest as they say!

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)

Indeed they do,
I have to say constantly smoking this Ice whilst trying to hold down a job might prove somewhat tricky. I was flat on my back on about three tokes...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:25, Reply)

Wiggy bought a hookah recently
and put green in it on Saturday for the first time. Everyone but him just passed out.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:28, Reply)

Wiggy is my kind of chap.
My nickname was, for a time as a teenager, 'leather lungs'...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:30, Reply)

better than mine, which was leatherface
*sobs*
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:41, Reply)

You also forgot that sex on speed is mindnumbingly rubbish.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)

I had no idea it was even possible.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:08, Reply)

Once you get it up, it stays up
For hours. You'd be amazed how quickly it becomes dull to just thrust away with no possibility of an orgasm on the horizon
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:11, Reply)

*insert joke about shagging your mum*

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:21, Reply)

Hehe
"insert"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:24, Reply)

Perish the thought.

( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)

He was a public schoolboy from an immensely wealthy background too.
Probably could have bought an entire meth lab out of his allowance...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:54, Reply)

Mind you, it's not like they'd have much use for the food whilst on speed.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:55, Reply)

Waxed everything from the neck down
That was bloody painful
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 13:58, Reply)

Jesus
You are officially the bravest of all the B3tans, until someone comes up with something more horrific than that
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:02, Reply)

Hardly!
Women get waxed all the time.
( girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:03, Reply)

Yeah but they're used to it
and I'm willing to bet Mad Dog's hair was unprepared for such trauma as it had never experienced it before
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:05, Reply)

Nope, had my legs waxed once before this!
Still fucking stings though
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:20, Reply)

Mate...
I was giving you an out
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:26, Reply)

I do it for charity, it's worth being called a girl from time to time

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:27, Reply)

bravest biggest tranny
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:04, Reply)

ooh that's brave!
Which bit was the worst?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)

His minge.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:12, Reply)

My legs are pretty hairy, so they needed doing about 3 times per strip
That was the worst at the time.

My armpits were bad, as loads of glue was left on, and the shower wasn't getting it off, so I had the bright idea to shave the few hairs left. That fucking hurt.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:19, Reply)

Oil gets wax off, like baby oil or cooking oil...
just for future ref...
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:27, Reply)

Thank you
I'm hoping I won't do it again, but sadly I know how much it raises, so it's always a possibility
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:28, Reply)

Plus you get to be like a dolphin for a few weeks afterwards
I like getting in fresh bed sheets with newly waxed legs, it feels dead nice.

I'm aware you're treading into Darth territory here if you agree with me.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:29, Reply)

I've never waxed owt
However, I like the idea of having my own territory
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:34, Reply)

if it was on a map it would be pink.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:40, Reply)

I'm going to find one of those globes that has the countries in different colours
then email the leaders of all those coloured in pink - or fuchsia, for that matter - saying "KITTY SEZ ALL YOUR COUNTRIES ARE BELONG TO ME"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:51, Reply)

I am Ruler of The Multiverse
so they should acquiesce.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 15:03, Reply)

I skydived (dove?)
for an anaphylaxis charity once. It was horrific and I'll never do anything like it again. The guy I was strapped to had really bad breath.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:00, Reply)

I'd be grateful for anything that took my mind off the sheer horror of living through my actual worst nightmare
Halitosis is a bastard

I am actually completely fucking terrified of heights
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:04, Reply)

Nothing like that scares me
so I was surprised that I hated it. It started before the jump, all morning whilst we were waiting and getting ready, I just felt a sense of dread and unease. Everyone was full of the usual "you'll love it when you get up there" and stuff, but I just hated every second. People said I looked paler than usual.

When I read about people having sky diving accidents or falling from great heights it makes me feel a bit nauseous at the thought of it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:14, Reply)

You should have cut his straps.
Fucking halitosic anaphylaxis charity skydiver.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:07, Reply)

But wasn't he the one wearing the parachute?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:10, Reply)

he was indeed
that wouldn't have been smart.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:12, Reply)

I think Larry Vest is trying to kill you.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:13, Reply)

he does hate me/Applebite

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:15, Reply)

But not necessarily in that order.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:21, Reply)

Retroactively

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:15, Reply)

It works in the Bond movies.
Also, how often do you get the chance to post a sentence like 'Fucking halitosic anaphylaxis charity skydiver'. And what sort of scrabble score does that get?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:17, Reply)

I've done one skydive (pics on my FB)
And I fucking loved it!!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:15, Reply)

all my friends loved it
and I should have loved it, but just didn't. I can't even describe why I hated it. Everyone said that feeling of freefalling was amazing, but I just blocked it out until he pulled the cord. I enjoyed that bit, the slowly floating down to earth, that was amazing. The views were just unparallelled.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:16, Reply)

Perhaps you should try hot air ballooning.
If at first you don't succeed - don't try skydiving.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:19, Reply)

I would like to do that
The height thing doesn't bother me, I think it was the plummeting. I nearly had a heart attack on Rita Queen of Speed and that was only going forwards.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)

Very serene up there
Views for miles around.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:19, Reply)

my ever helpful boyfriend was taking lots of pictures on the day
This was one he got of me on arrival at the base.


( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:22, Reply)

that is not a face that says "I am looking forward to this"

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:25, Reply)

I know!
All my friends were full of adrenaline and excitement, I looked like I'd been dug up and was upset about it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:26, Reply)

I can't see the pic due to my work's firewall
but I know exactly what that face looks like
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:27, Reply)

I has teh f34r

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:35, Reply)

Yep, that's what I was expecting
Ms Foxtrot gets teh f34r quite frequently. Usually when I disrobe
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

Poor girl doesn't know which way to turn.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:51, Reply)

that is worth a thousand words!
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:26, Reply)

Downed a bottle of vinegar once for £20
Was an uncomfortable 15 minutes but after that the tastiest beer ever...
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:27, Reply)

It is one of those things that I don't quite understand.
Ask someone if they're willing to pay you to sit in a bath of beans as you need the money for booze and pizza and they'll tell you to piss off.

Ask someone if they can spare some money for starving children and they'll give a world weary "gave at the office" type of response.

And yet, combining the two seeems to coax people into emptying their pockets, and handing over the hedge trimmers that they've just got from Argos using a discount voucher printed from the internet.
(Cave Duck, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:29, Reply)

It'll get you no more than a kick in the fucking bollocks from me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:33, Reply)

I use high viscosity bean juice for protection
Along with a couple of friends I did a parachute jump many years ago.
When mentioning this to family and friends the question "who are you doing it for" seemed to be a involuntary reflex action*.
We were the only three on the course who weren't sponsored. We were doing because we wanted to. Any charity element would have been mere ego dressing.

*Mind you it wasn't as bad as the time cica 1990 when, upon us mentioning that we'd booked some flights, my sister-in-law, without a moments hesitation asked my (then) girlfriend if she would be buying a shell suit to travel in.
(Cave Duck, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:35, Reply)

Does that mean that should I ever meet you
I can expect a kick in the fucking bollocks by way of a hello?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:35, Reply)

I fear so.
Nothing personal, you understand, just company policy.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:44, Reply)

Simply wear a high viscosity bean juice filled jock strap.

(Cave Duck, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:46, Reply)

Unlikely sentence of the day? I think so

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:48, Reply)

I'm squirming just a little
Having thrown Darth a bone - meaning a modest donation - and left the message "donation on condition you wear a pink tutu, bumder" I see the next donation is " Good luck ,Son. Mum & Dad".
I mean - what if they don't know?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:37, Reply)

maybe they'll think you signed it bumder
and they'll be all "isn't your friend Bumder generous?"
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:40, Reply)

Let's hope. They must suspect anyway, surely?

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:42, Reply)

You're certainly not the first person they've heard raise it as a possibility

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:43, Reply)

Well that's eased my mind.
And my post was just an attempt to get the thread back to the point.
You should get a lot of sponsers. B3tans aren't known for being tight. Especially not Kitty.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:49, Reply)

Most kind
I know it's a somewhat cheeky request and to that end I shall offer my eternal gratitude to anyone who does see fit to sponsor me. Larry haz it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 14:53, Reply)

*gasp*
how dare you!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 15:02, Reply)

*backs away slowly*

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Mon 21 Jun 2010, 15:07, Reply)