Which thread is the full story of last night in?

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:41, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

I can just sum it up here
hot guy I like, room, scrabble and whisky, things go the right direction, it's all nice till he starts with the hair pulling/biting/throwing about, and I go a bit mental and hurt him.

He came by to pick his stuff up
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:44, Reply)

oh
sad end to the story, i really thought he'd come back properly
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:44, Reply)

That sucks.
Shouldn't dish it if he can't take it though.

*nods sagely*
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:45, Reply)

He did apologise
and he remembered almost nothing. When I totted up the drink it was about one and a half bottles of whisky between us
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:48, Reply)

Blimey
Just make him think you had rough sex. Then it's all back on!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:49, Reply)

Nah
I'm not a fuckbuddy kind of person
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:54, Reply)

The very phrase is just awful.
I'm way too old-fashioned for that kind of thing, I fear. One or other of you is likely to want more than the other, and that way upset and hurt lies.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:57, Reply)

Precisely
I just don't do it
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:59, Reply)

Sometimes
it seems to me that I am the only person left who has my ludicrous and wholly unattainable chivalric notions regarding relationships. I've had (more than a couple of) one-night stands but they have invariably left me feeling rather sad. I genuinely cannot separate the physical from the emotional as most people seem to be able to do.

EDIT this is a really gay post. Sorry.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:05, Reply)

If it makes you feel any better
I share your values as regards relationships. One night stands are not my cup of tea at all.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:08, Reply)

Me too.
I've had one night stands but they were more about fun and adventure than sex.
( girlinthehole, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:10, Reply)

Looks like they're all I'm getting though
I feel I only attract weirdos, and I don't know why. I'm not that strange
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:15, Reply)

No, you really aren't.
The world is a shit place full of fucking weirdos.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:17, Reply)

I seem to get more than my share
turns out the same socially retarded scientist who asked me how big my breasts are, wants to ask me out. Oh and the last ten people who've hit on me (with two exceptions) have been freaks who looked normal
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)

If it makes you feel any better
I'm not sure 10 people in my whole life have ever come on to me, freaks or otherwise.
(berk, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:29, Reply)

It's happened to me lots of times.
I've gone along with it on several occasions as I didn't want to upset or disappoint them. This isn't me saying I'm hugely attractive, more that it's actually rather embarrassing as much as it is flattering, if you ask me.

Which you didn't.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

I'd rather no-one did
than creepy men, butch women with bad chatuplines and all the other assorted headcases
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

There is that
still, he was cute, and he fancied you. You were just...clearly not compatible in some ways. Don't take it to heart :)
(berk, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)

This is an excellent point
thank you
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)

fun and adventure drinking piss and rimming
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:16, Reply)

"Taxi for Boyce"
Log off now mate, before it gets any worse.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:13, Reply)

Innit, blud.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:16, Reply)

Well, on seconds thoughts....
You may well be playing 'the long game'. After all, these expressive emotional revelations really do open doors, and legs.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)

*winks*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:22, Reply)

yeah totally
because women are just that stupid
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:22, Reply)

Some are.
Most people of either gender are incredibly stupid if you ask me.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:24, Reply)

I'm beginning to agree

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:24, Reply)

Of course they're not
Now did I tell you about the time my puppy got run over?

No?

Well sit over here beside me, I need to whisper it, the pain is still too raw.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

You must target
seriously thick girls
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

I like them thick
Preferably with added Down's Syndrome for extra fat tongued thrills
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

You massive quender.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:19, Reply)

I need to put on a bit of 'Low' and revel in it.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:20, Reply)

Do it Monty.
I love their covers of Surfer Girl by the Beach Boys and Transmission by Joy Division. They also do a great cover of Ceremony.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:23, Reply)

I hope you didn't snap his homegrown sex toy
Mostly because it sounds like he'd have liked it.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:45, Reply)

i hope she DID!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:47, Reply)

he asked me today
why he had a cut lip
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:51, Reply)

Tell him your vagina is unusually sharp

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:53, Reply)

Point out how in certain fonts "clit" and "cut" are very similar
this will confuse him so much you can easily nick his wallet.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 22:05, Reply)

You poor sod. How upsetting.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:48, Reply)

It wasn't nice
but luckily I am more than a match for someone like that. I'm more ashamed and horrified at myself, than him
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:50, Reply)

Hope you're alright pal.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:04, Reply)

yeah I'm fine now thanks
just alarmed by just how violent I can be when the circumstances call for it. Guess primal instinct has a place
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:07, Reply)

Sounds like a fun night to me.
Sorry! can't have been nice for you.
( girlinthehole, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:50, Reply)

it was fun beforehand
he's a great laugh, and the beginning was nice. I just don't think he's learnt restraint
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:52, Reply)

Send him my way.
I'll teach him all about restraints.
( girlinthehole, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:53, Reply)

'Extreme' porn has a lot to answer for.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:53, Reply)

I suspect it's something like that
I found a handful of hair today though, who really likes that?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:55, Reply)

Duncan Goodhew?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:56, Reply)

I wish I knew what this meant
but it was horrible.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:58, Reply)

He is a famous alopecia suffering swimmer.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:00, Reply)

now that makes sense
I doubt even he'd have liked it though. Lucky I found it, the cleaner would've been horrified
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:01, Reply)

You have to remember this place is full of kids Monty.

( girlinthehole, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 20:59, Reply)

Why do you think I hang around here?
*leers*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:00, Reply)

Fuck off bert.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:33, Reply)

Hahah RUMBLED.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

You knows it Noncey Boyce.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:45, Reply)

yes this
In my experience guys who've had one or more long term girlfriends are a million times better in bed. If you've had 100 one night stands, you might have slept woth 100 girls, but you won't have learned how to find what works quickly and sexily!

Men who've watched too much porn instead are instantly identifiable by their rough handling and weird ideas of what girls really like!

On the plus side though most grow out of it by about 22 so you obly have to wait a year or so!!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:01, Reply)

Since he's had three longterm girlfriends
I strongly suspect that this was the first time he's tried it. I was just the wrong person to pick
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:02, Reply)

either that or his last girlfriend
did like it like that and he'd forgotten that few others do
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:03, Reply)

^ this is also possible
but mind you, your chances of finding a genuinely submissive person in society must be slim, so I'm surprised he forgot that
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:04, Reply)

Either way it's a bit much for the first time. Unless you discuss it.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:09, Reply)

exactly
How hard can it be to say "is that nice" or "do you like it like that".

Instead of looking for giblets and then wondfering why her flatmate doesn't join in.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:14, Reply)

I will be a happy man when I find a tall redhead who wants to kick the shit out of me

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:18, Reply)

Well I'm not a readhead, but....

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)

I thought you liked books?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:43, Reply)

I do indeed.
I think I'm missing a gag here.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:46, Reply)

Typo alert.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

When I laugh
it segues into a hacking cough, so if you don't mind awfully...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:48, Reply)

When I laugh at the moment
I end up sounding like an asthmatic mong being Lubbocked at a pool party. I feel your pain.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:51, Reply)

You look like that, too.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:56, Reply)

You say the nicest things, Monty.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:58, Reply)

I'm too good to you, I really am.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:59, Reply)

I am seriously looking forward to Friday though.
even though you're going to be there
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Oct 2010, 22:00, Reply)

You cunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 22:07, Reply)

Love you really. Mwah! Mwah!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Oct 2010, 22:09, Reply)

Readhead
read head, like a crack head
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

That was a step too far for my foggy 'high on Lemsip' brain, sorry.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:49, Reply)

It wasn't that funny :)

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:50, Reply)

Neither was 'Duncan Goodhew'
so we're on 1 all.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:51, Reply)

You're kidding aren't you?
The shiny dome; the lack of eyebrows; the fact it was caused by him falling out of a tree when he was a nipper... fucking hilarious.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:53, Reply)

The fellow is clearly a boor.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:18, Reply)

*handles roughly*

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)

aww man :(
that doesn't sound like how the plan went
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:02, Reply)

you're right, it wasn't
oh well none of us really get what we want
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:03, Reply)

maybe one day

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 21:03, Reply)