What to ask for a question of the week
I TOLD YOU SO...

Your mum/friend/colleague ever warn you not to do something, but then you go and do it anyway... with disasterous results?
This question is dedicated to you!
(IcePimp, Wed 27 Apr 2005, 14:35, Reply)

What to ask for a QOTW
Your best/worst dreams/nightmares...

Ever woken up and thought... 'thank God that's over'.... or maybe wanted to get straight back to sleep so that you could get stuck in again?!

Tell everyone what twisted thoughts run through your mind in the wee small hours...
(IcePimp, Wed 27 Apr 2005, 14:29, Reply)

Top Tips
Tips to assist you fellow B3TAers go about their day.
(Taco Tickler, Wed 27 Apr 2005, 14:09, Reply)

Man, you're gettin' old!
What makes you feel old?

For me, it's either realizing that most professional athletes are younger than I, or that during my lifetime the Doobie Brothers have been hugely popular, been wash-ups, had a come back, then been wash-ups again for ANOTHER 16 FLIPPIN' YEARS!

At least I'm not (yet) paying attention to Viagra ads!
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Tue 26 Apr 2005, 18:16, Reply)

QOTW
Tell us your favourite joke. Go on, you know you want to.
Ok then, i'll start.

What's worse than a cardboard box?





Paper tits.

er, i'll get my coat then.
(pointyearedpixie, Tue 26 Apr 2005, 16:11, Reply)

Dinner
If you could have dinner with anyone in the world, dead or alive, who would it be, and why? Mine would be Jesus, just so I could tell him how famous he's become. And how many wars he's been responsible for. And all for pretending he was the son of God. Pretentious git.
(Mr_Jums, Tue 26 Apr 2005, 15:58, Reply)

How about....
"Cunts you've met"?
(Wrecked Tums, Tue 26 Apr 2005, 14:41, Reply)

lol
thats well harsh
(jaybax, Tue 26 Apr 2005, 14:06, Reply)

Best or worst practical joke?
Did you get your mate a good 'un, or did it backfire badly? A friend once told me he couldn't believe that his friend fell for the old 'cling film on the bowl' gag - only prob was it was his toilet and he had to clean up the mess!
(Technotrousers is a caffeine-based lifeform, Tue 26 Apr 2005, 13:13, Reply)

dream!
The most wierd dream you have ever had? sounds good to me :D
(jaybax, Tue 26 Apr 2005, 11:50, Reply)

Ummmm...
...how about "if real life were a gameshow"?

In the post office, doing the krypton factor to get past the grannies trying to claim they're pension. And we've already got the Catchphrase front pager which is awesome :)
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Tue 26 Apr 2005, 9:56, Reply)

WE SHOULD ASK
I LOVE TO FART IN BIG PUBLIC AND THIS IS HOW I DO IT AND NOBODY KNOWS ITS ME
(IM A FREAKIN SKWERL, Sat 23 Apr 2005, 1:56, Reply)

how did you meet your partner
I'd just finished setting up the gear for a gig in a pub and had sat down for a pint, the bar was very busy and we were surrounded by students, after a while I noticed my right leg was getting rather hot so I looks down and finds the leg of my very tattered jeans well ablaze and Gwennie sitting there with a lighter looking all innocent, she moved in with me 3 days later, that was about 22 yrs ago
( Dill, Fri 22 Apr 2005, 18:51, Reply)

Messed Up Dreams
Whats the most weird dream you've ever had?

The other day i had a dream that i worked for the leader of North Korea Kim Jong-Il and i polished his shoes and made him toast.
Hmmmmmmm...
(King Of Wood Street, Thu 21 Apr 2005, 21:52, Reply)

inspired by...
...a livejournal quiz and a website i can't remember the name of.

Tell us a secret. Anonymously. It can be anything.

EDIT: postsecret.blogspot.com/ is the website.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 21 Apr 2005, 20:43, Reply)

Stuff you can't help but look at...
Working in an open plan office, I can't help but look at people when they start whispering (possibly my paranoia). Others include:
A flash of ladies underwear (even if I know they'll catch me!)
Motorists playing very loud/crap music.
A fight.
Dogs having a poo.
What do you find catches your eye?
(I came for the penguins, Thu 21 Apr 2005, 15:37, Reply)

Dreams
I once had an incredibly vivid pervy dream about a weird bloke I work with. There were flailing limbs, giant manhoods and heaving bosoms thrashing about all over the place. I couldn't look at him for 2 weeks and went purple every time he tried to talk to me. What's the perviest dream you've ever had and were there any consequences?
(ShockerMocker, Thu 21 Apr 2005, 13:33, Reply)

Act as your own tourism board!
Suppose you got an email from someone you knew from another country, and they were coming to your area (city, county, state, province, whatever). What would you tell them to see and do so they felt like they really experienced the place?

And no fair saying "keep going, there's nothing here."
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Thu 21 Apr 2005, 2:24, Reply)

QOTW
Supporting Hartelpool United football team (they're in League One and based in the north east) I'm sick of hearing the local football 'fans' moan and whine about their teams in the Premiership which got me thinking bout the team everyone loves to hate, but more seem to adore, adulate, etc etc...
Why do so many people in so many different countries, with so many different sports, let alone teams, support Manchester * United?

* = insert appropriate expletive



PS Just seen Man Utd lose 1-0 to Everton and have two men sent off, football can be sweet ;)
(1st Dgre I3uRn$, Wed 20 Apr 2005, 23:22, Reply)

Unusual Sights
Was driving home late at night and saw a rainbow.

Not the usual colours, more like a gray scale rainbow. It was an almost cloudless sky, with a full moon. Also my friend saw it as well, so it wasnt just me

What unusual sights have others seen
(loquis, Wed 20 Apr 2005, 17:57, Reply)

...
Oxymorons. They are numerous and amusing, as far as I'm concerned.
(superficialfilter, Wed 20 Apr 2005, 16:06, Reply)

Pure Pop
Okay - granted - we all have computers, iPods, iRivers and cassette recorders and of course we all love Radiohead, Eric Satie, Fleetwood Mac and other carefully crafted music... but what is the one pure pop song that you think transcends snobbery and is actually a work of genius? (Examples: Hit Me Baby One More Time, Like I love You, Dirrty)
( Micro Prawnvica, Wed 20 Apr 2005, 13:28, Reply)

QOTW
What's the strangest graffiti that you've ever seen?

Just saw one on a conservative poster saying 'Hatty Jakes was a socialist'
( The Beast can't help looking at womens breasts on the tube, Wed 20 Apr 2005, 12:06, Reply)

QoTW
How about "What do you do at work that you know you really shouldn't?"

Could be kind of like guilty pleasures in the workplace or alternatively really bad stuff that nobody should know about, ie. stuff you should tell us all....

Mine's not so sordid, just odd - I love taking the roller-ball bit out of computer mice then picking off all the dirt and scum that builds up on the rollers inside... Aaah bliss!

PS. I'm now upset as I found the mouse I'm currently using is a laser. Boo hoo.
("Doctor Doctor...", Wed 20 Apr 2005, 10:49, Reply)

The dangers of technology
Much as the current QOTW is moving I think we need something a little more cheerful next week...

One that sprung to mind was, when has technology go you in trouble? In particular via your own stupidity.

After spending what can only be described as an extremely sordid night with a sexy (and as it turned out utterly filthy) young lady called Gemma, I decided to cheer her up at work the next day by sending a text message detailing all everything I was intent on doing to her the next time I got my hands on her. Graphically.

Grandma was not amused to receive this. Not fully understanding it and seeking guidance as to the meaning of some of the content, neither was my mother. I still haven't heard the last of this from a couple of years ago and my gran won't sit next to me at family events any more.

I bet my grandma got up to plenty bloody worse once upon a time...
( dan j what the buggery bollocks is this?, Wed 20 Apr 2005, 9:01, Reply)

If you could be...
If you could be any character from any film, who would you be??

Edit: this is actually rubbish. do the confessions one!
(paintboy, Tue 19 Apr 2005, 22:33, Reply)

Should be an interesting one...
Weirdly wondeful things you do to amuse yourself on traveling journeys!!!

I play ma game of lookin at ppl thinkin wha it wud b lyk to do em' u giv em points on how horny they get u!!! keeps me amused for hrs on end...shud add her ima 17 yr ol gal who is bi!!! I love to travel
(Bhougal...hang me upside down from a banana tree and call me BERTTIE BHOUGAL>>>Oh Yeah...!!, Tue 19 Apr 2005, 21:38, Reply)

Things on your walls
What do you have on your walls right now that you can see without getting up? What keeps you company during those long hours of computer work/play? My latest addition is something I typed from something I heard:

"Poor Canada. They could have had English culture, French food and an American economy. Instead they got American culture, a French economy and English food!"

Whoo hoo! 40th post!
( setimret likes his metaphors mixed, not stirred, Tue 19 Apr 2005, 20:30, Reply)

Hows about...
The world's greatest insult! Mine is "she's got a face like a bulldog chewing nettles"
(squiffy raa raa pompousbottom, Tue 19 Apr 2005, 17:36, Reply)