Once going up, once coming down. Both too fast for comfort.

That would be a couple of weeks back in Portland, diving on the M2 (WWI submarine at about 35m depth). Not sure exactly what happened, but the dump valve on my drysuit wasn't dumping air properly on the ascent and I was surfacing fast. Too fast. Approaching the safety stop I wedged two fingers in the neck-seal (air goes out, but water comes in) and slowed down. Two other divers caught me and me and me buddy stoped at 6m for a while to let my heart rate slow down to normal speed and to do some decompression. Not nice. Felt like a completel numpty.

Weekend after that, lead climbing in London on a wall. Lots of slack out to clip into the next quickdraw, sliped and fell. Belayer lost her footing and suddenly I'm standing 5m lower down on the floor. More adrenaline than fear at the time, but after a quick break and looking at the wall I realised that actually, that was pretty high up. Eeep!
(Squash, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 10:50, Reply)

My first baby's due date is today...........
I'm fucking terrified.
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 10:44, Reply)

Now that would be scary
A docu-soapu-mentary of the life of b3tans?

I'm not sure any of us could cope with that...
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 10:17, Reply)

There's no face like Holm
I am absolutely terrified of ever meeting English actor Sir Ian Holm CBE. He is the single most scary man ever. My fear is entirely rational, and these are my reasons:

Alien

Anyone who hasn't seen this film should look away now.

There's a scene in Alien in which Ian Holm's character is revealed to be not exactly human. It's a shockingly weird scene, and being about 12 it scared the fuck out of me. I would much rather have had one of those comparitively cuddly Aliens lurking in my cupboard than Ian Holm being a mental headless robot.

The result? About three nights with no sleep.

Lord of the Rings

I was watching the first one on video for the first time, aged 23. You know, 23. TWENTY-THREE. TWENTY-FUCKING-THREE. That age where you know enough about films and everything to not be scared, especially by a PG-rated movie.

There's a bit in that film where Bilbo (Ian Holm) has been infected by the ring or some shit, and he reaches towards Frodo and briefly makes a scary monster face. A scary monster face that sticks in my head. For the next two nights. I have to check all my cupboards, just in case Ian Holm is hiding inside waiting to burst out with his scary monster face.

From Hell

Again, this has spoilers.

At the end of From Hell it's revealed that Ian Holm is the killer, and for some reason his eyes go all weird and black, and he slits a woman's throat open. It wasn't that scary but my Pavlovian fear of Ian Holm had kicked in and I found it absolutely terrifying. Again. No sleep that night and checking cupboards.

So if I ever saw Ian Holm in actual reality I would run a mile and shit bricks, for fear that he would do something very weird.
( krang, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 10:17, Reply)

bloody hell
I do look like Louis Theroux.

Well, if a documentary gently lampooning the peculiar behaviour of people on b3ta comes out, you'll know why.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 10:05, Reply)

Ghostwatch
Ghostwatch: The 1992 BBC1 Halloween haunted house spoof, except no-one told me it was a spoof:
- Sarah Green Locked in a basement with the mutilated ghost of a paedophile.
- Dog foetuses "strewn all over the playground."
- The voice that they all put on when possessed.
- The screaming cats.
- Mike Smith.
- "Pipes"
The crap acting just made it worse. I still can't watch it without remembering my dad, convulsing in fits of laughter as his 12yr old son wept silently and repeated, "turn it off. Please. Please turn it off." until I gave up and just stared blankly at the TV realising I'd never feel quite the same ever again.
(Ojo Rojo, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 10:02, Reply)

Woman in Black
I've been to see this on Broadway as a stageplay (ahem - name dropping!) - There was no fancy sound system at all, but it was totally scary with really good build up.

Brilliantly done though.

Go see it.
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 9:39, Reply)

Apeloverage
Louis Theroux?

I'm so scared.
( Kroney, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 9:36, Reply)

Apeloverage
Eeek!

I've just been freaked out by the photo on his profile.

I'm going to have to go and lie down in a darkened room now....
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 9:33, Reply)

my wall

If you look closely you can see that I've blurred out part of the poster in Photoshop - what would be Death's head. In a poster from Alchemy Gothic which is a yin-yang, where yin is a scantily-clad angel and yang is Death (or vice-versa).

And next to the poster are some other ones, which advertise a Star Wars exhibition.

I originally took this photo with the intention of putting it on dating websites, which may explain my need for said websites in the first place.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 9:05, Reply)

'The Woman in Black'

If it's the same one I saw (British made-for-TV movie set in Victorian(?) times) - my God, yes, incredibly frightening. Amazing use of an apparently low-ish budget.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 9:02, Reply)

Apeloverage's wall
I am afraid of Apeloverage's "fantasy" posters of wizards and unicorns in the picture behind him. I don't like it when people mess with that stuff.
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 8:32, Reply)

bah!!
i felt the fear when i was pulled over for speeding in a company car

i was doing 108kph in a 70 zone when i see this undercover cop car flash and motion for me to pull over

the company car was my means of earning money, and to get a ticket would mean instant dismissal - the result would mean i'd be sacked from a crap job and into dole territory

i got out of the car and the copper did his usual spiel - do you know how fast you were going blah blah blah.. i didn't say all that much, except for "i wasn't going that fast" and "i will be much more careful in future"

he walked over to the other officer to write out the ticket and i thought my life was over.. and then he said "mate, don't worry about it" and came and gave me a lecture instead and told me that he's done me a huge favour and to be much more careful in future

i got back in the car, heart racing a mile a minute, and screamed about what i'd just gotten away with.. no fine or demerit points or anything! and i didn't have to suck his wang to get let off either!! bonus bonus!!
(brotagaia, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 8:15, Reply)

It's the Woman in
BLACK you fucking retards.
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 8:14, Reply)

Christ, twice on Saturday (yes, last saturday, the 24th)
Was sitting round a mates house, playing Guitar Hero and getting a few drinks in, and my phone goes off, the ex had texted me whining about something, so I sent her back the old "Go away, I hate you, blah blah blah" and got back "I might be pregnant, If I am it's yours."

Fuck.

Later on, same night, well, Sunday morning about 5am, but still.
A mate who'd been there earlier comes back with one of his friends, who seems a bit sketchy as soon as he walks through the door. Fair enough, we think, these guys haven't got anywhere to stay at 5am, they can chill here till the afternoon. But this guy sits down beside the owner of the house, and starts getting a bit loud and honestly, a bit of a cunt. So he starts accusing the house owner of "hitting Jade" (none of us KNOW anyone called Jade) and we're all trying to calm him down. House owner takes the dog for a walk to calm himself down, comes back in, and this guy pulls a fucking combat knife on him IN HIS OWN HALLWAY. We manage to get the knife off him, and get him the fuck out of there.
(alexnessie \o/., Mon 26 Feb 2007, 4:06, Reply)

Not supernatural at all.
Just about two hours ago: driving home during a bout of sleet and freezing rain, had to go down a local hill with a 20% gradient. There is a pack of cars half way down trying to get up but stuck. I hit my brakes, the anti-lock starts instantly, and the car is not stopping, or even slowing down. Wife and kids in car, starting to freak out. Steered the skidding minivan into the curb to stop it. Then watched, in the rear view mirror, as a car behind me skidded down the hill at us - bracing for impact - other driver got his car turned and skidded by us without hitting. Not super scary as we were all going under 10 mph, but still. I just hate being in car accidents.
(mortdubois lacks imagination, doesn't play well with others, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 3:22, Reply)

Dead mans' heartbeat
I was mentoring a new student paramedic and we were sent to a patient in cardiac arrest.
The patients' rigor mortis was a sure fire clue that he was indeed very dead so needless to say there was little for us to do but wait for the police to arrive.

The student asks me what procedure do we follow if there was no rigor mortis or if we wanted to stop resuscitation etc.
I explained to him that one of the criteria is to connect the patient to the heart monitor / defibrillator and check that asystole (flatline) is present in two or more leads.
We were still waiting for the police and as it was the student’s first cardiac arrest I connected the deceased to the monitor as described and switched it on.
"Beep…beep…beep…" the unmistakable sound of a heartbeat coming though the monitor.
I nearly had a cardiac arrest myself until I realized that the monitor had detected the deceased’s internal pacemaker….
(emadex thinks the world will end on, Mon 26 Feb 2007, 1:06, Reply)

I'm blaming it on inhebriation
Once upon a time on holiday in Menorca with the family, I decided to stay up a little later after everyone went to bed to finish my drink and watch a few more of the weird trippy German techno videos they had on the hotel's version of MTV(I'm not into techno, it's just that with videos like those drugs are totally unnecessarry).

Finally, when my eyes had stopped revolving, I decided to retire to my room. Upon entering I froze; something had just dashed across the ceiling, just visible out of the corner of my eye. I had left the window open all day to allow some air in, and I was now wondering what else I could have inadvertantly let in.

Click. On go the lights and I start tearing everything apart looking for this unwelcome (and quite possibly deadly) houseguest.

After a while I look up to see the rest of my family stood in the doorway. I explain my predicament and they duly help me finish my search.

Satisfied that there is nothing in my room they all head back to their own beds, muttering insults as they go. I switch the light back off and settle down to sleep when something darts across the room again, same as before. I'm about to leap up and switch the lights back on when it happens yet again. And this time I notice it's always in the same field of view.

It turns out that a few strands of my hair had gotten loose and were swinging back and forth in front of my eyes, which in the low light looked very much like something running across the ceiling.

Glad everyone else had already gone back to bed and so weren't around to witness my realisation I finally settled down to sleep.



Alcohol, Mediterranean weather and German techno videos can fuck you up.

Fact.
( shovelboy This is bad - Two minutes to Belgium, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 23:59, Reply)

OzEden
Same play, same course, but I was with a bunch of girls from our school. About 12 of the 15 started crying with fear after that scream.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 23:50, Reply)

Hmm, not really scared but more concerned...
when my dad got squashed between two Series 1 landrovers (one 80 inch(#1) and one 110(#2)) - he dented a panel and popped the window out with his shoulders - hard as nails!

This occured when he was winching one of the landrover(#1) out of the garage (the brakes where a little seized) on the towbar of another landrover(#2) futher up the drive (sloped drive) held in place with gears (no handbrake as not yet been fitted) and a wedge that dug into the ground, suddendly the landrover(#2) held in place with the wedge, rolled up and over the wedge then rolled down the hill squashing my dad between the back of two series one landrovers (#1 & #2)!
( SkUG >_O i got a couple of stitches in my eyeball... ow, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 23:50, Reply)

The Woman in White
Back when I was doing GCSE drama we had to do a technical review of a play, how the set looked, what we would have done differently and so on. The play that our teacher chose for us was The Woman in White, it's a ghost story set in some rural moors somewhere or other. So theres me, the teacher and the other 7 lads doing the course all piling into the theatre in London getting settled in and ready to watch the play. The first part of it is pretty run of the mill stuff as far as stage horror goes, lots of dim lighting and people hiding in the background and a sodding great dry-ice machine, about 3/4 of the way through though it gets to a bit where the protaganist goes to open a door and when he touches the doorhandle there is a scream. We were all expecting this scream to come from off-stage somewhere, but no, it can from 3 foot behind our seats out of a fucking surround-soud speaker and ridiculous volume. I don't mind telling you every single one of us almost died with a mixture of shock and fright.
Length? It was quite a long play.
(OzEden is probably clinically insane, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 23:08, Reply)

I was rather high at the time
getting the tube home at some ungodly hour of the morning when I started to hallucinate. We were on the Northern Line which helpfully tells you, by the means of a little screen, which station is next. But it started lying to me.. telling me the wrong stations, mocking me. That wasn't scary, just fucking annoying and made me look like a complete nutter, muttering rude and angry things at a screen.
However, when you get close to a station, it stops showing words. When this happened, all I could see was this menacing black box opposite me. I had momentarily forgotten past grievances i'd had with it and became utterly terrified... of a fucking black box. I literally ran off the tube. I'm so fucking pathetic sometimes.

length? i tend to go on a bit in that kind of state.
(jeaneye, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 23:05, Reply)

Er
Ooo

I was walking from lunch with a couple of colleagues on Thursday and I saw a pigeon stood in my way. And froze.

Like a feckin' girl.

They took the piss for about 2 hours.

Thing was, I was actually terrified. Not, neccesarily of pigeons, but that they might fly up in my face. Like they do.

**shudder**
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 22:28, Reply)

Nuns
Nuns make me cold shiver - knowing how pure evil they can be....

Therapy? No need - I've got b3ta
(james_tiger_woods is going to start his killing spree on the, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 22:23, Reply)

to be honest...
The scariest few seconds of my life were a few years back when my wife was pregnant, we went for the 12 week scan, everything seemed normal.

The nurse/scanner found the baby, then she turned on the sound so we could hear the heart beat....and for about 3-4 seconds I couldnt hear anything, I was sooo scared.

Then the nurse/scanner turned to us both and told us that the baby had died, terror turned to tears almost immediately....

Those 3-4 seconds seemed to last an eternity....
(Dr Mandingo isn't particularly bothered...., Sun 25 Feb 2007, 21:44, Reply)

Really really REALLY scared!
To be honest most things scare me anyway cos i've got an overactive imagination however there have only every been two moments in my life that I had REALLY felt scared, in no particular order...

1) After watching Ghostwatch on BBC1 was back whenever, I knew it was a spoof but didnt stop me from sleeping with the light on all night, and the night after that!

2) Went to Alton Towers a few years ago, now i'm not the thinnest of people (hell i'll admit it i'm a cat funt!) now most of the rides have that bar that comes over the top of you and clicks into position.....however when you are a cat funt it doesnt go as far as everyone elses....hence thoughts of it springing open and you falling to your death, anyway I digress, well onto the Buzzsaw ride, bloody thing stops when we are at the highest point, tilts forward, I can see the drop, and I can also see that my safety bar isnt as far in as I would like....I thought it was going to open and I was going to fall to my death!

Life and pant changing moments indeed!
(Dr Mandingo isn't particularly bothered...., Sun 25 Feb 2007, 21:39, Reply)

Fatima
Probably just piles if the blood was bright red but see a doctor to be sure.
(lolwhites, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 20:49, Reply)

Oh crap
When I had a shit a couple of hours ago I found some blood on the toilet paper when I wiped me arse, what the hell's that all about?
(Fatima Whitbread's hardon drugs and the causes of drugs, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 20:44, Reply)

run run run
One saturday a few years back me and a pal was in Cardiff and being the keen football fans that we are my pal suggested catching Cardiff City at home to Brighton,i should have known it would have been a but hairy and it was.....

During the game the Soul Crew( Cardiff mob )at the back of the stand we was in chanted anti english slogans which was pretty scary in itself,at half time some old guy turned to me and asked me what i thought of the first half-i gave him my opinion and he genuinly asked me if i was there for soccer violence !!

One word from him to the lads at the back and me and my pal would have got a serious shoeing,that was mild compared to when we exited Ninian Park after the game.

Standing at the railway station waiting to get back into town i looked down the road to see circa 30 Soul Crew running towards us seeking English blood,the train journey back was VERY scary as it would have taken just one word from one of them to get us sussed and a night in Cardiff A & E earned.
(shug, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 19:51, Reply)

This morning.
I rolled over and saw what I slept with last night.

The real fear came from trying to sneak her back into the zoo.
(Good Looking Deity Grew a magnificent beard on, Sun 25 Feb 2007, 19:37, Reply)