"cockmouth-lake disrict"
it's actually COCKERMOUTH, i have a postcard from there

it has a pig on it
( stevierar, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:39, Reply)

French mice
chocolatepossum: while "je souris" means "I smile", it doesn't mean "I mouse" since there is no verb "to mouse" in French. Also, "a smile" is not "une souris", it's "un sourire".
(In Cognito, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:35, Reply)

Place names
On the rude place names, there's a 'nob end' near Bolton.
(finbarr, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:30, Reply)

Ants
explode in vodka

Apparently.
( Sausagegirl, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:19, Reply)

Nescafe...
In Malta, the word 'Nescafe' means without coffee. (So Ive been told.)
(hoathenfold, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:14, Reply)

Arms
The space between your elbow and the start of your hand (that'll be your wrist then) is the same length as your foot...it looks freakishly longer,but it is indeed true!
(wormeater, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:10, Reply)

Dark Matter
according to the mighty Patrick Moore it might just be that the missing mass in the universe is just the same normal stuff we make chairs and sanwiches out of, only spread very thin.

slightly related - Isaac Newton was more interested in alchemy than physics, and was also a totally paranoid egomaniacal fuckwanger
(bloodyHassocks, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:08, Reply)

Hull City FC
is the only english league club whose name has no letters that can be coloured in.

Berk is a rhyming slang insult, from Berkshire Hunt.
( rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:03, Reply)

5. Tobacco is the only legal product that, even when used correctly, harms your health
sugar?
(magictorch, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:01, Reply)

coca cola
once contaied cocain
(bashman, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:01, Reply)

Yet more pedantry
Only female rats lack bladders, so if you want to keep rats get male ones and they will smell much less and require less cleaning. This is probably because the females stay at home to look after their babies and so can mark their territory. The males go out hunting and so don't want to leave a trail for predators back to their nest.

You very obviously can sneeze with your eyes open since the eyesocket is in no way connected to your mouth. Also eyelids are so thin that they couldn't contain the pressure if this was true, and so your eyeballs would have popped out the first time you ever sneezed.
(Cuddles It's not rape if they're already dead, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 14:00, Reply)

dark matter
didn't (initially) have anything to do with the age of the universe: it was discovered because you can weigh a galaxy (by seeing how fast it rotates), and when astronomers added up all the visible gas and dust (and stars), it didn't nearly account for the observed mass.

on a similar note, roughly 10,000,000,000,000 neutrinos go through your body every second.
(ru, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:55, Reply)

pitates arrrrrr!!!!!
pirates wore eye patches because with this eye covered it would become hyper sensative thus making pirates able to navigate the seven seas at night arrrrrr

also theres a place in austria called 'fucking'
(Claude Speed was a Roman called Claudius Speedicus, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:52, Reply)

Nylon
Not called nylon because of being developed in london and new york. urban legend. actually, they just thought it sounded cool.
(Slurpy The Frog, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:51, Reply)

To Inglorious_Other
Dark matter is inferred from the gravitational attraction between galaxies, which is much stronger than can be accounted for by the visible matter. It has nothing to do with the start of the universe which had no mass requirement, and in fact no mass until about 10^-33 seconds after the big bang.
(Cuddles It's not rape if they're already dead, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:50, Reply)

Pi and Phi
They are 2 totally different things. Look up the Greek bloke and shove that fact up his stupid arse.
(Mad McMad, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:46, Reply)

the heaviest bird to achieve takeoff....
... without a run-up is a pigeon.

This QOTW is depressing.

can I have another one bob?
( Humpty Dumpty was Pushed Is unaware of having any limits., Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:45, Reply)

rude names of towns in the world Pt 2
Twat Hats 3 miles North West of Annan, Dumfrieshire tinyurl.com/4ze4j
Cocklicks 1 mile South East of Twat Hats tinyurl.com/57a9s

could.not.make.it.up
(sham-il-eer-tak-tak noes better but still can't give a fuck at, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:34, Reply)

greek bloke.
We had a greek bloke in our group at Uni... every time "pi" was mentioned and pronounced "pie" he shouted "IS NOT PIE... is PHEE" and start to tell us that it was pronounced 'Phi'.

once, a well-spoken lad kindly turned round and pointed out to him that the greek men were famous for preferring to use adolecent boys for s3xual pleasure.

It was a totally un-related bit of usleless info, but it DID shut him up.
( Humpty Dumpty was Pushed Is unaware of having any limits., Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:31, Reply)

dr albert hoffman
accidenty discoverd LSD when he spilled a mixtuer of liquds on his hand driung and experiment later after riding home on his bike he fell into a ditch and tripped off his tits
(bashman, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:28, Reply)

In the words of Alan Partridge
Its time for Alans fact of the day:

Crabsticks do not actually contain crab. And since 1993 have had to be labelled crab flavoured sticks.

Another fact of the day tomorrow.

Classic Queen
(Robble, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:24, Reply)

rude names of towns in the world
clit -romaina
fucking-austria
blow me down - cannada
dildo-cannada
bastard-norway
cock up- lake district
cockmouth-lake disrict
china mans knob- austrialia
cunt - spain
muff - northan ireland
sexmoan-philippines
shag island - india ocean
twatt- orkey england
wank- germany
wet beaver creek - australia
brown willy -corn wall
mount mee - australia
titty ho england
leatherhead -surrey, england
my home town
(bashman, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:14, Reply)

oh gd...
i have a reputation among my friends for knowing what they affectionately refer to as "dustbin knowledge" : useless for exams but interesting and [sometimes] useful to know. here's some of my favourites:
1.the gravitational pull of the doctor that delivered you is more than 6 times that of jupiter
2.tmesis (teh-mee-sis) is that practise of inserting one word into another (ie: absof*ckinglutely)
3.if all your DNA was streched out it would reach to the moon and back six thousand times
4. Antarctica is the only continent without snakes
5. Tobacco is the only legal product that, even when used correctly, harms your health
6. 99% of an atom is empty space
7. Picasso was an astrophysicist who tried to paint as we would see things in four dimensions
8. "Alice in Wonderland" and its sequel "Alice Through the Looking-Glass" were written by Charles Dodgson who was a mathematics professor at Cambrige Uni, again to do with astro-physics theories.
9. "Nylon" is called so because it was discovered in London and New York at the same time
10. Einstein dropped out of school at the age of 16
11. to make 1 kg of honey, a bee would need to visit 4 million flowers
12. Vatican City in Rome is the worlds smallest independant state with a population of 1000
13. 10% of the worlds population live on islands
14. a blue whales pork-soldier is roughly 6 feet long
15. the housefly only lives for fourteen days
16. you are 23.4 times more likely to get struck by lightning than win the lottery
17. a "jiffy" is a real unit of time: it is 1/100th of a second
18. peanuts are used to make dynamite
19. more people are killed each year by coconuts than sharks
20. only 8% of the worlds money is in circulation
apologies for length...no jokes though
(asme, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:14, Reply)

Thanks HarryFreeeze...
... I shall sleep easy tonight.. :o)

Edit:
I don't fellate horses.
( Humpty Dumpty was Pushed Is unaware of having any limits., Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:13, Reply)

following up from nosemonkey
sexual intercourse with an animal is illegal but foreplay is not - so if caught by the rozzers fellating a horse, you're alright.
( harryfreeze Ignore, Hide, I like this!, Reply, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:09, Reply)

King James I was brilliant
he passed a Topless Act, under which young women were not to be seen in public unless their breasts were exposed to the nipple. Apparently a sign of virginity...
( TV's Nosemonkey, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 13:00, Reply)

I say, what an absolute shower!
Did you know that the gap between front teeth a la Lesley Phillips/Madonna/Me is called the diastema?

It gave me a quiet sense of satisfaction when I learned that. It's such a lovely word, as are frenulum (bit beween the foreskin an the head of the penis), philtrum (John Major), perineum (like Cherie Blair going out for the evening with her husband and Alistair Campbell, between the cunt and the arsehole) and sacral dips (sounds a bit like an altar, and I've often looked down at them crying 'Oh my God!' before making a small offering, which is appropriate).
(Bob Hopelessness, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 12:59, Reply)

A less serious one (but true)
The 1967 Sexual Offences Act legalised buggery for consenting adult males in private, provided they were't members of the Armed Forces. The last time Buggery was legal was the 1550s (it was briefly made legal by Mary I, before being made illegal again by Elizabeth).

Buggery is still illegal for heterosexuals. However, under the Sexual Offences Act of 1956, a wife cannot testify against her husband in a buggery case unless the person being buggered is under 17.
( TV's Nosemonkey, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 12:58, Reply)

Ooh another one
Did you know that if you measure the length between the tips of your outstretched arms it will be the same as your height?
(Mad McMad, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 12:57, Reply)

I find that
more often than not chickens die when you fuck them
(a_monkey_spanker, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 12:54, Reply)