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A friend of mine (who's fairly PC and right-on) went to India some years ago.
She was on a bus just about to pull out of the village when she suddenly realised she was going to be sick. In a big way. Due to dodgy food.
She slid open the window, closed her eyes and vomited out of the window. Unfortunately the local child beggars, upon seeing the window open, thought she was going to give them money. As the bus pulled out, she looked back to see a small group of children still standing with their arms upraised and covered in vomit.

I told her at least it was a hot meal for them, but what's the most embarrassing holiday incident you've ever had?
(I helped save b3ta! chobb ,ø¤ºGREATº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRAPISTº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRECOMMENDEDº¤ø, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:00, archived)
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PFFFFFFFFFFFFTTT!
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:01, archived)
Thinking that pasting random quotes
from "Battle Beyond the Stars" would be funny.
www.b3ta.com/talk/452991
(I helped save b3ta! Geordie Al, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:01, archived)
Bwa-ha-ha!
That's too funny...
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:02, archived)
Wetting myself on the German Exchange trip
I'm not telling you how old - however this event has had drastic repurcussions to my adult psyche, and although if I'm not thinking about it I can go all day without having a wee; put me anywhere it'd be embarrassing to really need to go pee and I'm up and down every 30 minutes

Why. Why do I tell you these things?
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:04, archived)
I've followed-through when I was in Amsterdam once.

(I helped save b3ta! chobb ,ø¤ºGREATº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRAPISTº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRECOMMENDEDº¤ø, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:07, archived)
I have a similar story
that wouldn't go amiss in this thread
but I need to look at some of you face to face soon, so I abstain ;)
(I helped save b3ta! just mike, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:09, archived)
*spang*
Don't be such a wuss. You're going to meet me face to face and you guys know almost all my unpleasant details.
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:11, archived)
ok then
many, many moons ago, I was visiting my brother, playing warcraft I think and having a general farting compo
I forced one a bit too much, and had to scrape it off my keks afterwards
happy now?
(I helped save b3ta! just mike, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:13, archived)
Feeble.
I don't even take note of things like that any more. I just resignedly go and change my underwear.
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:15, archived)
this is a regular occurrence for you then?
I'm ashamed that it happened to me even once!
(I helped save b3ta! just mike, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:23, archived)
Happens to the best of us.
1 and only time for me was after doing a lot of MDMA and just before I went into the club ducked into an alleyway to have a wee.

I waddled the 30 minute walk back home with cooling liquid crap down the back of my legs.

Determined to make a night of it, I took off all my clothes and put them on a boil wash, had a good scrub in the bath and went back out to what turned out to be... a really crappy (pun unintended) night out.

Give us the details then.
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:10, archived)
Oh deary me.
I've abased myself while on drugs in a number of ways, fortunately self-soilage hasn't been one of them.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea Dmedff, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:14, archived)
Well it's one of those
things that's a good deal funnier some time after the event than it is at the time.

Oh, did I mention it was late november and fucking cold? I must have steamed all the way home.

Still, one of my mates managed to crap himself whilst driving to work, completely sober/straight and in a traffic jam with cars all around him.
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:17, archived)
Oh dear God.
Dodgy curry the night before?
Or just plain old spastic colon?
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea Dmedff, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:20, archived)
You know?
I have no idea. I was too busy being in stitches at his facial expression as he described the event to me.
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:22, archived)
Predictably,
I read facial as faecal.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea Dmedff, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:23, archived)
one of my greatest agony/ecstasy moments was quite similar
train toilet at 7am after a long and chemically enhanced evening
sudden violent cramps in both legs combined with the divine relief of an emergency outshitting ... I didn't know whether to scream or have a wank
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:16, archived)
Hahaha
I know this feeling well!
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:18, archived)
My cow
orker just asked me why I'm sniggering. What on Earth do I say to that?!?
(I helped save b3ta! Dekazer, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:13, archived)
Just explain you're on an
internet chat site talking about people soiling themselves.

I'm sure they'll understand.
(I helped save b3ta! Fenris temporary Lazarus, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:23, archived)
And then
email them a link to Tubgirl maybe.. I like your thinking fella.
(I helped save b3ta! Dekazer, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:25, archived)
Going on an 18-30 to Ibiza
and pulling your mum
(I helped save b3ta! Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:04, archived)
Ah! So you're the guy with a small cock,
nose-hair and moobs?

;)
(I helped save b3ta! chobb ,ø¤ºGREATº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRAPISTº¤ø,¸¸,ø¤ºRECOMMENDEDº¤ø, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:08, archived)
I laughed for quite some time at that image.
Thankyou.
(MooCow_Byter, Thu 14 Apr 2005, 16:58, archived)