WHINGE TIME.
My Macbook charger is on the fritz - AGAIN. This is the fourth or fifth time this has happened, and I'm getting a wee bit fucked off with it. I'm so glad I didn't pay for this stupid posey overpriced machine, or I would have someone's neck!

Right, your turn.
( Bats, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:29, archived)

My Macbook is working just fine thank you.

( ArthurTheRat, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:30, archived)

*smug macbook remark*

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:32, archived)

My jaw hurts.

( ArthurTheRat, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:33, archived)

Its punishment for owning a macbook

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:34, archived)

Why should anyone be punished for having good consumer sense?

( SuperMatt, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:04, archived)

My macbook pro is working splendidly too
and also sucking me off under my desk, whilst making tea.

Apple - smugger than Gizmo waist-deep in croissants.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:45, archived)

I'M NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE HERE TODAY
/dante
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:31, archived)

DAMMIT VIRGIL, HOW MANY COCKS DID YOU SUCK?
/dante's inferno
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:35, archived)

Oh no, it's erupting!
/Dante's Peak
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

To be nobody-but-yourself -
in a world which is doing its best night and day, to make you everybody else - means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.

Your turn again.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:31, archived)

You can't get better than a kwik-fit fitter.
Your turn.
( RR I love you ... in a way, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:35, archived)

Death is not an event in life:
we do not live to experience death. If we take eternity to mean not infinite temporal duration but timelessness, then eternal life belongs to those who live in the present.

Your turn.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:39, archived)

I've been to paradise
but I've never been to me.

Your turn
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:44, archived)

Set yourself as the standard.

( RR I love you ... in a way, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:49, archived)

How the fuck does someone 'go to me' anyway?

( WormuIus, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:50, archived)

Stick your head up your arse
oh wait...

winkingfacetoshowIdon'treallymeanit
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:53, archived)

I have become death: Shatterer of worlds.


your turn.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:46, archived)

I feel like chicken tonight!
LIKE CHICKEN TONIGHT!

your turn.
( WormuIus, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:50, archived)

My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo
I want to sink her with my pink torpedo

... your turn
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:52, archived)

FUCK YEAH.
I love that song.

Big game is waiting there, inside her tights.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

Yo, I woke up, fucked up off the liquor I drunk
I had a bag of the skunk, won in last night's tunk
Pussy residue is on my penis
Denise from the cleaners
Fucked me good, you shoulda seen us
( WormuIus, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

haha I'd forgotten how awsome that song is
Caressing this bitch, plus I'm checking out them tits
Sipping on that fine shit
I ain't used to buying
I gotta hit it from behind, it's mandatory
Like taking ho's money, but that's another story
For surely ya pussy on toast, after we toast
her clothes fell like Bishop and Juice
The womb beater, clean pussy eater, inserting my jock
In that spot hotter than the hottest block, don't stop!
Response I got when I was knockin' it
Clocks steady ticking, kinky finger licking
Then carrying on, semen's at my tip when she moans
I gotta slow down before I cum soon
And work that nigger, like a slave owner
When I dropped off my outfit, she knew I wanted to bone her
She's foaming at them lips, the ones between the hips
Pubic hair's looking like some sour cream dip
Without the nacho, my dick hit the spot though
Pussy tighter than conditions up on black folks
we in the final stretch, the last part of sex
I bust a fat ass nut - then I woke up next
Like, what the fuck is going on here?
This bitch evaporated, pussy and all just picked up and vacated
And now I'm frustrated cause my dick was unprotected
And doctor Wesley's telling me I really got that shit
( WormuIus, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:58, archived)

I have become Shatner.
KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:57, archived)

hehe
Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.
Friedrich Nietzsche's turn.
( GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:50, archived)

If you gaze for long into an abyss,
the abyss gazes also into you.

Samuel Johnson's turn.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

A man seldom thinks with more earnestness of anything than he does of his dinner.
Plato's turn
( GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

We are inclined to believe those whom we do not know
because they have never lied to us.

Kant's turn?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

A man often meets his destiny on the path he takes to avoid it.
/likes this one but doesn't know who it's by.
( RR I love you ... in a way, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:04, archived)

Batman.

( GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:06, archived)

Nah, that was "Rubber nipples on the costume... too much?"

( RR I love you ... in a way, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:08, archived)

There's a similar Sufi story
www.highbeam.com/doc/1P2-3933318.html
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:18, archived)

Brilliant.
I love that.
( RR I love you ... in a way, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:31, archived)

When you meet death in a story, never, never, ever think you can outwit, outsmart, trick, confuse, or otherwise triumph over him/her. You are always fucked. There's no point in galloping to Samarkand, or trying to hide under the bed, or swapping the life candles so Death blows out someone else's, or going 'Look! Over there!!' and then running away. Give it up. You are done for. Welcome it, and then you can avoid ending up as the idiot in someone's story about how some idiot thought they could cheat death.
( vladimir, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:41, archived)

Wah wah I own a macbook wah wah.

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:31, archived)

Did you keep it watered'n'feed?
Apparently they respond well to regga music.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:32, archived)

I'm going to start an argument about Macs and PCs
...Go!
( Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:34, archived)

someone already tried this
down there
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:35, archived)

No.

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:35, archived)

It's like trying to choose between death by shooting or stabbing.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:49, archived)

Shooting, definitely

( WormuIus, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:51, archived)

RiscOS is much better.

( turb0t, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:57, archived)

I'm broke
but I've nothing majorly huge to whinge about. Give me a few minutes and I'm pretty sure I'll find something.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:34, archived)

you're not as cool as me
whinge about that
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:35, archived)

I'm infinitely cooler than you.
So shut your face.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:36, archived)

yeah, being a short, ginger, take that fan
you are the epitome of coolness :p
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:38, archived)

HELL YEAH.
You'd KILL to be me.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:42, archived)

i'm like the anti-you
you are my nemesis. let's have a never-ending series of altercations once a week
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:46, archived)

Go on then.
Don't push me into any more hedges though, you shit.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:51, archived)

hedges are your kryptonite

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:17, archived)

How about...
Those chocolate covered pretzels, why don't they sell them anymore?
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:37, archived)

It's a good point
They were awesome.
( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:38, archived)

Do you remember what they were called?

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:40, archived)

Pretzel Flipz
the white ones were kick ass awesome
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:41, archived)

Racist.

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:42, archived)

wha...
I was just looking for somewhere to purchase Flipz, and I found this.

www.flipzsite.com/site/apps/s/inline.asp?c=fkLPJ9MYKwH&b=368537

Chocolate covered pretzelness is next to godliness, apparently.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:48, archived)

Sometimes, when I buy a bag of pretzels, I'd buy a bag of chocolate buttons to eat them together with.

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:42, archived)

FTW!

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:45, archived)

I might pop down to Tescos tonight and do this. Nom nom nom.

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:49, archived)

Sounds like a nutritious alternative to dinner.
I think I'll join you, I'll get some booze and fags too... and a copy of "Hard Target" from the cheap DVD bin. It'll be the best night ever.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

You are a genius

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:45, archived)

I've not had any problems with the charger, but I have had battery issues.
I love my macbook.
( SuperMatt, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:35, archived)

I've just seen the milkyway advert and they've changed the words
The bit where it used to say "he's looking for a chocolate treat fluffy and light cause he knows it won't spoil his appetite" has been changed to "cause he knows its something that tastes just right" and then the end bit has been changed from Smart old blue to good old blue.

:(
( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:36, archived)

I actually feel sad that I have remembered the exact words for 20 years

( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:37, archived)

It just gets worse, you know.
You'll end up remembering themes from ads that you saw when you were five, or themes from sit-coms that aired once in 1985, on BBC2. I wonder what gets squeezed out of the brain to remember these inconsequential little things?
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:41, archived)

exactly it's mental isn't it?

( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:44, archived)

And yet
I'll still forgot to pick up milk on the way home today. If you want to dredge the depth of TV memories, go look at tv.cream.org/ . You'll soon get lost in a sea of "Oooh, yeah, I'd completely forgotten that!"
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:48, archived)

You need to add a NSFW to that link
not because it links to anything naughty; just you'll spend so long on it you'll get the sack
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:59, archived)

What is this nonsense you are belching out?

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:42, archived)

The old red car and the blue car advert is back on
see Tyronnes thread below.
( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:45, archived)

I can't be arsed using my mouse wheel
They've just asked me to do some more overtime today. The health and safety rep fell over and broke her wrist on the way to a health and safety meeting. I'm covering her job to Carlisle ironically this afternoon.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:50, archived)

did she really?
see, Morrissette? THAT'S fucking ironic.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

All true
I saw her yesterday with a bruise on her eyebrow. I asked her if she didn't think to break her fall with her hand instead, so she showed me her wrist swollen right up. I feel terrible now :)
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:59, archived)

I'm sneezy
Stupid fucking hayfever.
( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:37, archived)

Haha

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:43, archived)

Fuck off

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:45, archived)

And i have the day off.
Ha.
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:46, archived)

Again, fuck off

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:47, archived)

I liked Psychoville a lot.

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:37, archived)

I've recorded it
I saw a clip the other that had me in stitches where the woman said "Go and fetch a dustpan and brush I've your back all over my legs"
( Mrs Sp@m, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:40, archived)

Had me hooked right from the start with the letter writing scene.

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:48, archived)

It was quite funny.

( SuperMatt, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:43, archived)

FUCK PIG!

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:50, archived)

I liked it.
It was disturbing. I like things that are disturbing and make me laugh.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:45, archived)

*waggles*

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

My car is shit
misfiring and overrevving, incredibly slow to accelerate, the coolant keeps evapourating (no leak as far as I can tell), and the engine cuts out when I'm slowing down for roundabouts etc.

Google suggests electrical fault needing a new ECB and new coils :( I don't know what this means
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:55, archived)

coolant can't evaporate
it's a sealed system

either you've got a leak, or you've blown the head gasket between the cooling channels and one of the cylinders.

EDIT - it's not a Fiat is it? If so, you've probably blown one of the coils and taken the ECU with it. Really common. You can GAZ me if you want any advice
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:00, archived)

either that
or car AIDS
( WormuIus, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:02, archived)

sounds expensive :o( it's only a 51 plate too
Serves me right for buying a Clio I guess

EDIT: yeah cheers will send you a gaz
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:04, archived)

Stalling when decellerating
can also sometimes mean that there is a leak somewhere in the vacuum.
( turb0t, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:03, archived)

Unless it's 20+ years only
it won't have a vacuum advance on it. ECUs removed the need for that, along with the need for distributors
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:05, archived)

Demon Internet are behaving like idiots again
Sending invoices for random charges, that I know nothing of.
Can anybody recomend a decent ADSL service, that also gives me a static IP address*, and is not overly expensive.

* I need static IP address as dyndns wont work with some of the things I need to do
( turb0t, Fri 19 Jun 2009, 9:57, archived)

urgh some of my Outreach Centres are using Demon
they have a habit of cutting the internet off, even when we have actually paid the invoice. It takes several hours of phone calls before they'll look at their screen and say.."oh yes, sorry you have" and turn it back on again
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 19 Jun 2009, 10:02, archived)