I was in Hamley's a few minutes ago, and they had a stuffed toy on sale for €4655.
Admittedly it was a life size giraffe, but who the fuck pays the guts of five grand for a teddy that won't fit in a child's bed?
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 12:58, archived)

A giant paedo

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)

This is the right answer.


[CLOSES THREAD]
( Jobe, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)

can I come in? I just need a bottle of milk
go on, I'll be 2 minutes
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:03, archived)

I bet you're going to spend an hour reading TV Quick and won't even buy it.

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:19, archived)

TV Quick Razzle
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:21, archived)

A cast photo of coronation street accompanying the article about next weeks harrowing tale of northern life would do me

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:28, archived)

idiots?

( jenpots, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)

It's how I ran up all of my debts :(((((

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)

If you want, I can help you consolidate all your teddy bears into one easy manageable sofa.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:00, archived)

hahaha, this is genuinely one of the best posts I've ever read.
Congratulations 90nz0.
( GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:27, archived)

=)

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:37, archived)

supermatt was inside it, praying and hoping

( thealternativefact, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)

what, like inside, or 'inside'?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:00, archived)

I think he'll take what he can get

( thealternativefact, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:02, archived)

A zookeeper that lost one and doesn't want the boss to find out?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 12:59, archived)

pfft

( jenpots, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:00, archived)

splendid

(rigby happened on (and with added toothache), Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:19, archived)

"He doesn't seem to be eating much"
"He's just a bit unwell guv"
"He's not moving much either"
"He had a big breakfast"
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:23, archived)

michael jackson

( Lightguy hail satan, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:00, archived)

This isn't a growth market.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:00, archived)

Oh. Wait...
( WHARRGARBL, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:00, archived)

I'm probably not the first to say this, but he looks like Skelitor in that photo.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)

It doesn't matter if your black or white,
so long as you're white.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)

Mohammed Al-Fayed

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)

No matter how many life size giraffe tedies he puts in Dodi's bed, he aint coming back.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:21, archived)

"Those fugging Germans killed my Diana"

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:24, archived)

NO-ONE
Thats why it's still in the shop
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:01, archived)

A millionaire furry obviously

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:02, archived)

Richard Branson, then.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:03, archived)

Richard Branson Donkey Gums
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:10, archived)

A giraffe with a fetish?

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:02, archived)

someone who REALLY likes giraffes.

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:03, archived)

I did see a video of a guy who'd attached a dildo to a large unicorn soft toy
I imagine it'd go a similar way
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:04, archived)

Filth.
Collecting lots of large stuffed toys would make for a (relatively) cheap and rubbish zoo.
( Jobe, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:05, archived)

that's true
no upkeep to think about, except for hoovering all the animals once in a while.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:05, archived)

I hope it was a massive horse soft toy with a dildo on its forehead

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:05, archived)

that would be the comedy option
alas, no :( It was an animatronic one, too :((((((
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:06, archived)

:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:08, archived)

ROBOPLEGIC WRONGCOCK

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:09, archived)

what do animatronic unicorns do even when they don't have dicks strapped to them?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:11, archived)

Sudoku, mainly.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:12, archived)

this one seemed to totter about and its mouth opened and closed
it may have been saying "end this hellish existence, please"
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:27, archived)

or asking for carrots.
do unicorns eat carrots?
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:31, archived)

I think they eat virgins.

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:38, archived)

Phew,
You're safe then, you tiny pervert
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:42, archived)

possibly not safe for work:
www.newgrounds.com/store/product/penicorn
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:50, archived)

I have a friend who is attracted to giraffes.
He doesn't have €4655 though. And it would be a bugger to shoplift.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:04, archived)

they have very elegant knees

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:07, archived)

He likes the eyelashes and tongues.
I wish I was making this up.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:07, archived)

haha
bless. Aren't giraffe tongues blue?
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:10, archived)

I have no idea.
I will be drinking with said pervert later and shall inquire.
( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:11, archived)

their tongues are prehensile though.
I imagine that's part of their charm.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:28, archived)

maybe his friend is a smurf

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:13, archived)

I know what he means about the eyelashes.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:18, archived)

Not you too.

( Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:18, archived)

do a google image search for "giraffe eye".
I wish I could get my lashes like that.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:20, archived)

tie your legs to a lamp post, and your eyelashes to a fast car
/kipling
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:25, archived)

Exceedingly bad idea.

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:29, archived)

thanks for the advice Mr Kipling

( Neddy shucking chit funt, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:40, archived)

I know someone who bought a life-siz inflatable rhino.

( WormuIus, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:35, archived)

I bought my son a 6ft inflatable Godzilla when he was about 6 years old for christmas
forgot to buy a foot pump.. spent several hours blowing the bloody thing up on christmas eve.
( Neddy shucking chit funt, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:45, archived)

DADDY!

( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:47, archived)

I'm sorry sweetie
daddy took quite a beating from the lad and my brother.. he died the next day
( Neddy shucking chit funt, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:49, archived)

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
You killed ma paw.
*swears revenge*
( Godzuki needs more sleep., Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:50, archived)

This is probably the most wrong thing I am ever going to admit to you lot
but I used to collect inflatable dinosaurs.

My favourite was a MASSIVE Pterodactyl.
( WormuIus, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:48, archived)

screencapped just in case you delete this post you big Jurassic Geek

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:50, archived)

my son was (and still is) totally obessesed with dinosaurs
if you see a 20 year old with a very tight dinosaur t-shirt on in North London.. that's probably him
( Neddy shucking chit funt, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:52, archived)

I have a triceratops lamp
and a dinosaur mug, for tea.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 14:11, archived)

Millionares?
I don't know. I always thought the biggest teddies and things were just for show.
( Bats, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:06, archived)

Really?
Seriously?
Do they take credit cards?
(thediscokingpin, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:30, archived)

That's no way to talk about ym
/ac
( WormuIus, Mon 6 Jul 2009, 13:34, archived)