It's you isn't it? *points*
You're the human shrub aren't you?
( NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:50, archived)

Leaf it out

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:51, archived)

Or are you pollen my leg?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

You're barking up the wrong tree

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:00, archived)

TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
TREE TREE
TREE TREE TREE TREE TREE
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:02, archived)

Pfft
I proclaim you the new Gonzo.

Can someone please dispose of the old one?
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:04, archived)

no let's keep both, it can be like a hilarious country house farce, with one running into a thread just as the other one disappears, saying "have you seen my brother? We're going to play tennis!"
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:06, archived)

It'd make a great sitcom
Like the odd couple. But with great hair.
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:07, archived)

TREE
TREE
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

TREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeee
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*breath*EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

P P
O A
P G
L E
A
R
||
||
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:10, archived)

*takes Gonzo outside*
*ties his leash to the old tree in the field*
*tell Gonzo to sit still*
*sheds a single tear*
*...*

*digs hole and buries body*
*returns to house*

... it's done...
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:07, archived)

OH BOY ! OUTSIDE !
Oh man, oh man, I can't wait, are we going to see squirals? I think I can smell some squiral piss, they're soo cool. Look at that, a tree ! *sniffles around*, oh wow, that's so cool, look at all this grass, I think I can smell.... yes.... THERE'S A SQUIRAL ! YES !
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:11, archived)

aww
this is so adorable
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

at first I didn't get any of those jokes
But now i have just twigged
( Gooch Is neither here nor there, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:05, archived)

....
...

..

....

...

Tree?
( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:06, archived)

Sorry
But they had me stumped for a while
( Gooch Is neither here nor there, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

SHRUB

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

Bastards the lot of you:(

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:02, archived)

Why don't you make like a tree and get out of here?

( Theoban What of it, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:51, archived)

Make like a banana
and go.
( NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:53, archived)

we established yesterday that i am a tree, not a shrub
that guy looks like the thing on the cover of a young knives album
( manolith hooray for me, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

that's a privet matter
( vladimir, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

I'm not clicking that

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:52, archived)

Why are councillers such fucking mong tards

“If the Human Shrub is crossing dual carriageways in order to make a political point then I think he is being very irresponsible.”

“He could get himself injured or killed, or even worse could lead to someone else being injured or killed.

“At least when he was outside the town hall he was amusingly stupid.

“This is not funny at all.” 

What a lot of shit. "Man can't cross road" spaswank
( magnum, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:53, archived)

It's not a man
it's a shrub.

And they're good at roads. I often see 'Plant Crossing' signs.
( NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:54, archived)

haha
"heavy plant turning ahead" makes me think of an oak tree on a turntable.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:56, archived)

But I might think there is a tree in the middle of the road and try and drive through it...

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:54, archived)

Indeed.
It just reads
"waaa waaa waaa, we are being pointed out as cunts and now we feel obliged to try to deflect that by making some harmless, and indeed probably beneficial, person seem like the bad guy"
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:57, archived)

local councils see themselves as the nannies of the community,
if some member of the community only goes and voluntarily does something for their own community, that's like stealing their thunder.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:59, archived)

And none more so than Edinburgh city council.
We moved two sets of the communal bins together (about 35ft apart), to allow a much better organised and easier to use street parking, after checking for disabled, or even just unhappy residents.

A few weeks later (and much better parking from the residents) there was a series of big angry neon orange warning letters posted on the bin saying CCTV might used to catch the culprits.
The bin men like it as it saves them a few minutes work.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:07, archived)

This is the old
"I am the master of where things should go, you will respect my authoriteeee" effect.

What would you even get charged with? Is "moving a bin" even an offence?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:08, archived)

According to my laywer (srsly) it would be someting about vandalising road furniture,
but there is a slight grey area with wheeled bins on roads, apparently, that would mean the CPS wouldn't even entertain it.

In short, they would be furious and would issue all sorts of threats, but it would be toys out the pram.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:13, archived)

see if you can organise for everyone on the street
to go out at the same time and move it together.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:16, archived)

I was thinking
of Guy Fawkes masks, and blaming 4chan.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:18, archived)

They would have to prove actual damage and malice for that to stick.

( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:20, archived)

Apparently 'moving' can be construed as vandalism.
But, again its just hissy fit stuff.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:22, archived)

Vandalism is covered by the Criminal Damages Act 1991, section 2:
[where a person] without lawful excuse damages any property belonging to another, intending to damage any such property, or being reckless as to whether any such property would be damaged shall be guilty of an offence.
( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:27, archived)

Fair enough.
They might whine about the placement of the bins could lead to them beocming damaged (it's on a straight piece of road.....), but I certaihly won't argue with your quote.

In which case my previous point, as seemingly enshrined in local Council law, stands: big squealy hissy fit, waa waa waa.
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:35, archived)

Ah. I've just spotted that this is Scotland,
the Common Law offence of Malicious Mischief therefore applies, although they'd still need to establish malicious intent.
( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:39, archived)

And, of course,
if it's on Council property you may be guilty of Trespass as soon as you breach any prescribed conditions of consent, which could reasonably include "Not fucking About With The Bins".
( L-Space - scientia sapientes vocat., Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:42, archived)

It's comments like that, that reconfirm that polititions are humourless cunts... 99% of the time.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:01, archived)

and the other 1% of the time it's Boris Johnson,
who's a veritable cornucopia of comedy in himself.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:03, archived)

Exactomondo.
And the whole Expense-gate thing, it shows they do have a smidgin of a sense of humour.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:04, archived)

I wish they'd stop it with the "gate" thing,
one day there's going to be a scandal about a gate, and the media are going to have to change their naming scheme or look very silly calling it "gategate".
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:06, archived)

Oh hai Nobby.
How's the parrot?
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:57, archived)

Haha, he's a national hero in my eyes.
I love stories like that.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:58, archived)

The shrub of our hearts
in haeven with babby p and maddy?
(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:59, archived)

Mikale jaykson.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:00, archived)

Baby Peat

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:00, archived)

A++++ post, would LOL again.

(thediscokingpin, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:02, archived)

Oh man, I want to get a little bush and dedicate it to Maddy.
So I can call people sickos for looking at Maddy's bush.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 15:03, archived)

I am formaly requesting that you start linking to your comic again, maybe in a Near The Top if shitcunts are complaining.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 7 Jul 2009, 14:59, archived)