drink responsibly this weekend please

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 17:56, archived)

fuck off, yeah?

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 17:57, archived)

you can fucking do one an' all

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 17:59, archived)

Yeah, yeah?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:17, archived)

Always.
I can't remember the last time I got properly drunk.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:03, archived)

might do

( H.B.Mupps, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:07, archived)

I failed

( H.B.Mupps, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 20:22, archived)

I'm failing.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 21:12, archived)

I'm about to fail

( broadsword w⚓, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 21:19, archived)

Shut your whore mouth

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:09, archived)

Sounds doubleplusungreat, don't sign me up!

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:15, archived)

I'll take responsibility for my drinking this weekend. That's as good as you're getting.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:16, archived)

The captain Kidd is a nice pub.
I drank there with some people. They were not pricks.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:19, archived)

It's not , it's a tourist pub in the middle of a shit hole, at least go drinking on wapping high st with the proper east end scum cunts , no offence yeah ?

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:22, archived)

I had a nice time there.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:32, archived)

Not sure that counts for fuck all you millwall loving scum cunt , no offence yeah ?

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:42, archived)

None taken mate.
Fuck right off though, yeah?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jun 2017, 18:52, archived)

She loves you yeah yeah, yeah?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:08, archived)

Mind your own business, yeah?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:12, archived)

this morning i was mostly throwing up so much
that i swear my stomach just started making things up
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:13, archived)

"I certainly don't remember eating that horseshoe"

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:20, archived)

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/customer-reviews/R3KF26XERA3XK3/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_rvw_ttl?ie=UTF8&ASIN=B00XBM04UK
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:22, archived)

Pop up pirate was always the thinking mans operation.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:30, archived)

Er, they're two completely different things
That's much like saying that snooker is the thinking man's bermuda shorts
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:37, archived)

Okay, maybe not quite that extreme

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:37, archived)

They both fall within the 'children's tabletop game purview'.
More like sending your kid to grammar school in Bermuda shorts instead of them weird shorts they make kids wear instead of long trousers.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:43, archived)

Operation is a glorified wire loop steady hands game, Pop Up Pirate is a random 'will I be the one to trigger a pre-determined event' toy
THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:48, archived)

Alright, 'that one adult in games workshop, surrounded by spods, when it's open late at night'.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:56, archived)

Can confirm, have ginger ponytail, NHS specs, body odour and BMI of 55

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:59, archived)

I'm on your side, skill and chance are opposites in this

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:58, archived)

strange i would have compared it to Buckaroo myself

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 21:13, archived)

Jaws was good

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 21:26, archived)

Hahaha

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 19:28, archived)

Not a fucking chance

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 20:37, archived)

Fuck off. I've been hammered since lunchtime and I don't even have to start sobering up until sometime on Tuesday.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 9 Jun 2017, 22:17, archived)

What's the best Bond theme, eh?
I quite like 'Nobody Does It Better' and 'Live And Let Die', but then 'Goldfinger' is a stone cold classic.

Look, I don't seen anyone else stepping up with anything better. Get fucked. Prick.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 13:56, archived)

Dunno, fella I went to school with got 113 votes , think he lost

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 13:57, archived)

Alright Mongy, I got a letter from the government[1] the other day[2], I opened and read it, it said they were suckers[3]
1) Parcel Force
2) This morning
3) I need to pay customs £16 to get my watch.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:10, archived)

Custom duties are a cunt , used to be you could just pay at the sorting center

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:11, archived)

I did it online.
The fee was £8, fair enough, I resent the £8 PF handling fee though, pricks.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:12, archived)

That is a bit steep, I remember paying the postie once for a load of stussy stuff , I suppose it goes to auction if you don't pay, might look in to that

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:15, archived)

'Live And Let Die' probably gets my vote as well.
I thought Adele did a more-than-passable Shirley Bassey impression with 'Skyfall'.

That Sam Smith excretion was utterly fucking awful in every way.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:00, archived)

See also: Madonna

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:00, archived)

I wasn't even aware she'd done one.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:04, archived)

Die Another Day... It's utter shite

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:16, archived)

The Brosnan era of Bond films passed me by without leaving a single enduring memory.
Generic action films, all of them, with nothing of the spirit of the original franchise.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:18, archived)

Goldenye on the N64 was alright though eh?

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:29, archived)

no question

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:30, archived)

y

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:36, archived)

it certainly WAS

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:44, archived)

Oh y definitely
Although I did play more Perfect Dark, practically the same game though
( H.B.Mupps, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:44, archived)

laptop gun ftw

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:50, archived)

amazing

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:46, archived)

I don't either of those, I'm afraid

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:02, archived)

You don't either of those led it the road? That's a shame.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:03, archived)

I don't EVER either of those led it off the road

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:08, archived)

and I stand by that

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:08, archived)

guyfall

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:48, archived)

I don't really care for the bond films

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:00, archived)

Me neither, but the themes are good.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:00, archived)

They're tosh , and I don't use that term lightly

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:01, archived)

come on, don't be like that

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:02, archived)

the themes are wank and so are the movies, soz

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:04, archived)

I said, come on don't be like that
and I won't say it again
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:08, archived)

Nor me.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:10, archived)

but that wasn't the question
come on lads, I'm very tired today
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:11, archived)

Probably the bassey one.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:12, archived)

thank you

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:14, archived)

Goldeneye is probably the ultimate.
I also like your suggestions, and forgotten "The World is Not Enough" by Garbage
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:00, archived)

Oh yeah, that one's pretty good

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:01, archived)

oh great, more Duran Duran chat

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:04, archived)

That Aha one was alright as well.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:06, archived)

that one by the dead guy is pretty ok

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:06, archived)

Gandhi?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:11, archived)

Timothy McVeigh?

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:11, archived)

Graham Garden

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:13, archived)

Live and Let Die
i quite like Moonraker, too
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:23, archived)

I've always had a thing for Rita Coolidge's "All Time High" from Octopussy.
Then I read that it's rated 22nd of the 23 themes on Digital Spy. Faced with the opprobrium of not agreeing with that barometer of all-things-tasteful, Digital Spy, my REAL favourite is...
*scrolls*
well, obvs, it's Louis Armstrong's 'We Have All The Time In The World'.
( Fray Brentos *mega-belms*, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:27, archived)

i find his voice curiously annoying

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:34, archived)

all of this album
youtu.be/gEr3PAQNG8s?list=PLVTu3z4l9QOlgWKfNIQP-sgC54VCAK_9Y
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:34, archived)

delete this please

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:47, archived)

no m8
it's the best thread of year so far hands down
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:13, archived)

Snake Eater

( H.B.Mupps, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 14:47, archived)

Uh, not a single person in this thread has got it right.
Its obviously this one for absolute classic James Bond Jr.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:13, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=oTItRfN-LO8&feature=youtu.be&t=6
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:17, archived)

What I love about this, is that it drastically changes gear about half way through
So much so, that it makes me feel slightly queasy
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:17, archived)

christ alive

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:19, archived)

It's better than the twist in dusk till dawn

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:19, archived)

What, like this?
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:20, archived)

hmm

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:31, archived)

okay got it
www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3-hFB1hZ60
( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:28, archived)

Burt Bacharac

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:31, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=47_qh3Qj-YA
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:33, archived)

Bond is bent as fuck and so are youn all

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:54, archived)

no u r m8

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:55, archived)

Ah, so proud
www.portsmouth.co.uk/news/crime/pictures-video-shows-group-assault-driver-as-he-arrives-to-vote-at-havant-polling-station-1-8001812
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 15:58, archived)

6/7 muthafuckaaaaas
www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-40205908

Doing anything nice this weekend?
Im of to see Elton John tomorrow. Y' Know, just incase I wasn't feeling gay enough.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:49, archived)

Alright Jase, I'm going to clean some records, bottle my homebrew and maybe have a go at making an iskander kebab.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:50, archived)

Sounds extremely heterosexual

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:51, archived)

jesus fucking christ

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:03, archived)

Got two people coming to look at the house
so I shall be spending the morning keeping my fingers crossed
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:52, archived)

Good luck to you!

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:53, archived)

Thank you!
I think we're going to need it.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:55, archived)

talk to them about your guitars
that'll help
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:58, archived)

uitars enital piercings
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:00, archived)

I'll mention this to the agent when she arrives
*whips it out*

'Do you think this will affect the value?'
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:03, archived)

put THIS on the HIP!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:04, archived)

Oh, I won't be there
That'd be weird, wouldn't it?
'WHY? WHY DON'T YOU LIKE MY HOUSE? BUY MY FUCKING HOUSE!'
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:02, archived)

i went to a couple of viewings where the owners were there
it is weird. one tried to get me to buy the place by offering to throw in their cat
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:15, archived)

jeepers

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:15, archived)

I know someone who had a cat thrown in, it was mandatory or something.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:32, archived)

Theresa May?

(Roger McGough-Pipe, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:35, archived)

It's the cat I feel sorry for.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:37, archived)

We sat and had a coffee with one house we were considering buying.
Then the guy dragged his feet answering questions.
Probably homophobic.

His decor was shabby anyway
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:34, archived)

If I spent ages doing my house up I wouldn't want to give it to people who'd put pink glittery wallpaper up either

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:38, archived)

(blue)

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:56, archived)

^tory

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 13:07, archived)

Where's the lesbian rights party

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 13:09, archived)

Not this time!

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 13:10, archived)

I'm driving to the arse end of Poland for a wedding
however, unlike usual Polish weddings, this one's not religious and has a barbeque and campfire for a reception. I might actually enjoy it.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:53, archived)

Are you still socially forced into stumping up cash to go to the barbeque.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:55, archived)

yer, but its still family stumping up for the Married Life Together fund
so it doesn't hurt so much. And it's easier than buying a toaster.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:02, archived)

Divorce proceedings starter fund

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:40, archived)

3:55 Kempton.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:54, archived)

Barely suppressed murderous impulse is favourite

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:57, archived)

#infest

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 13:29, archived)

Homo erectus
Your score:
4/7
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 11:55, archived)

GSAF

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:02, archived)

score:
6/9
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:20, archived)

Homo habilis Your score: 0/7
Yessss
( broadsword w⚓, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:00, archived)

404: Page not found

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:03, archived)

Thicko McDerbrain 2/7

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:03, archived)

Yeh I got 4/7 on this.
Going to a folk concert tonight, getting up at stupid o'clock tomorrow to help a mate move house, going to a triple birthday party tomorrow night and going to another concert on Sunday. Yeh.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:05, archived)

move sell a

thanks m8
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:06, archived)

haha
I can put an ad on Gumtree if you like.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:10, archived)

can't hurt

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:15, archived)

Homo habilis Your score: 3/7
lol homo
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:12, archived)

I got erectus. lol

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:35, archived)

Elton John doesn't seem to get mentioned as a gay icon much, despite being a massive screaming bender.
Maybe it's because he's a man.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:15, archived)

Dunno.

( mongychops, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:16, archived)

Watching the tennis m8
C'mon Tim!
(Roger McGough-Pipe, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 12:35, archived)

morning

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 7:23, archived)

Morning
Well this is all a massive disappoint
( H.B.Mupps, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 7:30, archived)

dunno what you're on about

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 7:34, archived)

Not often I wake up to Radio 4 and have a good laugh.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 7:38, archived)

first wank of the day is no laughing matter m8

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 7:44, archived)

This.
Quite enjoyed the dejected tory doctor trying to frame the cuts to elderly stuff as a thing for young people.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:21, archived)

"Look, we're not just making you worse off!"
Wankers.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:38, archived)

hi, premature ejaculators

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:04, archived)

it's not early from my perspective

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:04, archived)

Morning has broken (Britain).

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:10, archived)

what larks will be had today

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:12, archived)

Days like this put the 'fun' in 'fundamental disappointment'.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:14, archived)

Zippidy fucking doo dah

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:21, archived)

have a Crunchie mate

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:25, archived)

Not a bad idea

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:25, archived)

he wants to fatten you up to rape

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:27, archived)

look at the size of him, $$
I'd already need an acro prop to keep his arse cheeks apart as it is.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:48, archived)

coalition of chaos yesssss

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:22, archived)

Bit negative m8

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:23, archived)

hey, who wouldn't want an early 90s wwe tag team running the country?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:26, archived)

#VoteBushwhackers

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:40, archived)

strong. and. stable.
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:18, archived)

that's a coaltion we can ALL agree with
otherwise they might kill us
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:54, archived)

oh great, now I've got Tones on Tail stuck in my head

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:26, archived)

Tone Girl Ta F +m
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:44, archived)

I had Reflex stuck in my head earlier this week
dunno how that got there, I haven't even watched Venture Bros in ages.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:45, archived)

That one is 'alright'

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:48, archived)

Noel or Liam?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:28, archived)

^ Battle of the Monobrows

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:32, archived)

Noel is fractionally less of an undeservedly arrogant mancunian chimpoid

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:34, archived)

MODS!
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:38, archived)

Fucking hipsters
/ac
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:40, archived)

I'd like a house with a garden where I can build a Tinyhouse or workshop or similar
but then I realise it's fucking pointless if I've already got a perfectly good house to spend my time in.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:46, archived)

It keeps you apart from the spoilt brats that you never bothered to establish boundaries with so they think that any room is their room.
A woman I know seems to be proud that her young boys constantly walk in on her when she's in the bath or on the toilet. At what age does that start to become massively fucking awkward for both parties?
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:51, archived)

different cultures, innit
I feel bad enough walking around without my tshirt in front of my parents, whereas my wife will walk out of the bathroom naked in front of hers, and have a chat with her mum while still dripping on the lino.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:56, archived)

Yeah but no-one wants to see a topless english bloke and eastern european women tend to be pleasing on the eye

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:04, archived)

tell you what
the amount of landwhales in England has skyrocketed, it's a fucking national embarrassment. I have never seen people that fat in Poland.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:06, archived)

I get the exact same impression every time I go back to Blighty.
English girls have a monopoly on...pastiness.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:07, archived)

I never knew a gunt could have a gunt

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:15, archived)

It's like guntception or something.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:18, archived)

The Poles are doing all our manual jobs, all we 'natives' do nowadays is sit in offices and complain about stuff on the internet ... oh

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:09, archived)

you've also got chain all-you-can-eat all-day-breakfast places bolted onto the sides of pubs
That's a calorific tragedy in the making.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:13, archived)

28

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:00, archived)

alright '$tewart'

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:02, archived)

My dad's neighbours used to take family showers.
The mum, the dad and their 12-year-old son. Even as a 15-year-old I found that suspicious.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:02, archived)

+golden
Also, world's strongest bath cradle
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:03, archived)

"Make sure you clean under his foreskin."

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:13, archived)

You're not helping to make this any less creepy.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:17, archived)

That's not right.
I can't remember when I last shared a shower with mine.

One of my earliest memories is of taking a bath with my dad, when I was little. I took a shit in the bath, and I have never seen him move so fast since.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:14, archived)

^28 at the time, etc.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:36, archived)

lol
Seems unjust that I moved out before the old man lost control of his bowels, really.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:47, archived)

that poor sod and his dr who shed

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:00, archived)

one of them is described as a 'wee tower'
lol
( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:18, archived)

morning comrade

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:52, archived)

fuck off back to Corbynistan

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 8:59, archived)

oh I will
you should all come with me, it's gonna be well lol
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:03, archived)

witaj, towarzysz

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:03, archived)

*black panther salute*

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:25, archived)

Think this is my fave image of
last night. To be honest Lord Buckethead looks a more strong and stable leader.
( keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:12, archived)

Theresa May still won her seat though

( $$ ✅, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:18, archived)

I'm sure right now she is pleased as punch about that

( keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:29, archived)

Is he modelled after the Black Knight from Monty Python?

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:19, archived)

marnin'

( manolith hooray for me, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:20, archived)

orlroight?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:28, archived)

hahaha, you munsoned it you mad old bint.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:22, archived)

even among Conservatives, she's unpopular
that's a new low
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 9:29, archived)

JEZ WE CAN
THERE'S STILL HOPE, PEOPLE!
( brb pussy in bio, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 3:05, archived)

CORBYN CORBYN CORBYN CORBYN

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 3:12, archived)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA FUCKING HELL

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 1:38, archived)

ikr lol

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 9 Jun 2017, 2:28, archived)

I took the dogs over to the park and then to vote.
4 different people told me I should post a photo on Twitter with a "dogs at polling stations" hash tag.
Why are the people you're forced to be near utter cunts?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:21, archived)

There was someone at my polling station with a Daschund

( H.B.Mupps, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:23, archived)

Does that make them a cunt?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:38, archived)

Tory safe seat due to nearby toff towns, no-one else sees any point going along

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:24, archived)

PR would stop all this apathy but they're hardly gonna bring that in

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:25, archived)

penis rabies?
i don't see how that would help
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:31, archived)

ill-advised maid marian porno

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:36, archived)

Its a good excuse to go for a wander

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:40, archived)

You can't even be intimidated outside these days, it's political freedom gone mad

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:43, archived)

There was a man with a UKIP placard dangerously close to the car park leading to the polling statiom

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:53, archived)

"How about I take a picture of you and tag it #cuntsatpollingstations"

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:54, archived)

How about I just politely smile and say that sounds nice, so as not to cause upset to people who are local to me and probably quite nice all told.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 20:01, archived)

nah
you wanna be seen as the local nutter. No one fucks with a nutter.
( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 20:04, archived)

I already wear my pants on my head. What more do they want?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 20:07, archived)

You need to say "wibble".

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 21:12, archived)

yeah, it's a 'thing' apparently
no more or less pointless than any other hashtags i s'pose

#guffs
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:58, archived)

#followthrough

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:59, archived)

#wankywank

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 20:00, archived)

#pollingstationbombinglol

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 20:26, archived)

It's no #ignoringdoubledeckers

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 21:13, archived)

I left the dogs behind and took my kids along to the polling station.
I took no pictures and posted no hashtags.
Quite relieved that my daughter had switched to urging me to vote for "the red one”.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 21:11, archived)

You may as well have done.
Your 'dogs' are probavly the gayest thing that would have been posted today.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Thu 8 Jun 2017, 21:45, archived)

home time thread

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:00, archived)

I've cast my vote and am pub bound, soz

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:02, archived)

nice

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:07, archived)

No doubt it will all kick off

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:12, archived)

I do love watching a pub fight

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:15, archived)

Alright

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:36, archived)

Alright Wicca , hows the boy

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:59, archived)

Hulk sized, bearded and voted for the first time today.
How're your brood?
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:04, archived)

Two moody teens, but they are alright

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 19:18, archived)

And me, bought a lasagne pie to keep me going and burned me tongue
#streetlife
( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:54, archived)

Nah, not yet.
I did vote earlier though, after still being undecided last night.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:13, archived)

sealed with a kiss

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:15, archived)

Gave it a little brush over of the nads.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:21, archived)

Another soiled ballot

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:22, archived)

Just noticed that rob's stopped advertising PACT coffee and is now selling "trust me" trousers.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:44, archived)

it's a shame he got rid of the 'Tailer Park Boys Live' advert

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:50, archived)

Yeah I was thinking of going and seeing that

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:54, archived)

Apparently bubbles doesn't do liquor and whores the song anymore, fuck that

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:32, archived)

Where will we buy tickets for their 2013 tour now??? 🤔😭👨‍👨‍👦‍👦

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:57, archived)

One sneeze, and there goes my sensitive bladder...

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:52, archived)

I should've left ages ago.
This is all NHS Digital's fault.

My apologies to mongy.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 17:58, archived)

Alright psychochomp

(dozers You big spazzer!, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:13, archived)

RIP psychochomp

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:16, archived)

just leave

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:16, archived)

just got some new glasses, and you know what they say;
"new glasses, new prime minister"
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:24, archived)

uh-oh!

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 18:24, archived)

At lunchtime,
I saw a woman with a lipoma over her left clavicle that was the exact size and shape of a bollock. Medicalols chat.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:03, archived)

Is that how you recorded it in her notes?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:05, archived)

Of course, but it's OK because it just looks like an impenetrable squiggle.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:09, archived)

Ahh, I miss handwritten notes.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:25, archived)

My dad's predecessor used to draw pictures of all his patients as animals in their records

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:25, archived)

Your mum's first husband?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:28, archived)

i think his name is 'granddad'

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 15:26, archived)

This one time, I saw a young woman who couldn't be considered conventionally attractive
and thought "Chances are you'll never know love, and will die a lonely childless virgin and a massive disappointment to your parents". Lol!
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:09, archived)

lol

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:09, archived)

maybe her dad was a ballchinnian

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:09, archived)

I just got a compensation payment after being hit with a rhythm stick.
That's right, I filed a personal Ian Dury claim.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:13, archived)

Alright Tim Vine/Milton Jones/Gary Delaney/Stuart Francis/[comedian]

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:19, archived)

i'll be there
www.newsshopper.co.uk/news/15333927.This_Bexleyheath_nightclub_really_wants_people_with_learning_difficulties_to_have_a_good_time/
( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:13, archived)

I'll call ahead to get us on the guest list

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:14, archived)

if you'd learn to read without running your finger across the page
you wouldn't have such difficulty learning now
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:17, archived)

Finger 111!!!!111!!! MODSss

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:18, archived)

Calling it something neutral like 'Shine' is just going to attract regular clubbers/gay people/Geoffrey Rush enthusiasts.
They should stick to their convictions and call it 'Mong' or something.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:25, archived)

it's not much of a club, it was a snooker hall/ late night drinking den, then a cocktail bar, now a club, it is an old wooden hut that if memory serves was the old library when i was a kid

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:27, archived)

Sounds suspiciously like shed chat to me.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:31, archived)

should knock the cunt down and put flats on it
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/ce/Nyne%2C_Bexleyheath%2C_DA6_%283416168450%29.jpg/1024px-Nyne%2C_Bexleyheath%2C_DA6_%283416168450%29.jpg
( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:35, archived)

Crikey.
It's a bit on the fugly side, isn't it?
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:38, archived)

“Allot of the credit..."
hnnnngh
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:46, archived)

they use it more than once

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:54, archived)

I know a man with only 1 leg

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:19, archived)

how does he smell?

( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:23, archived)

^ Windy the cabin boy

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:27, archived)

i'd prefer not to if it's all the same to you.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:33, archived)

you saw her as in you took her on a date?
what's her favourite colour?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:25, archived)

It was tempting.
If she can get a bollock that far down her neck, she must be a champion at deep-throating.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:27, archived)

Tell her she smells nice then ask her if she prefers her hair stroked or pulled.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:33, archived)

You've done this before.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:34, archived)

……………………„„-~^^~„-„„_
………………„-^*'' : : „'' : : : : *-„
…………..„-* : : :„„--/ : : : : : : : '\
…………./ : : „-* . .| : : : : : : : : '|
……….../ : „-* . . . | : : : : : : : : |
………...\„-* . . . . .| : : : : : : : :'|
……….../ . . . . . . '| : : : : : : : :|
……..../ . . . . . . . .'\ : : : : : : : |
……../ . . . . . . . . . .\ : : : : : : :|
……./ . . . . . . . . . . . '\ : : : : : /
….../ . . . . . . . . . . . . . *-„„„„-*'
….'/ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . '|
…/ . . . . . . . ./ . . . . . . .|
../ . . . . . . . .'/ . . . . . . .'|
./ . . . . . . . . / . . . . . . .'|
'/ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .'|
'| . . . . . \ . . . . . . . . . .|
'| . . . . . . \„_^- „ . . . . .'|
'| . . . . . . . . .'\ .\ ./ '/ . |
| .\ . . . . . . . . . \ .'' / . '|
| . . . . . . . . . . / .'/ . . .|
| . . . . . . .| . . / ./ ./ . .|
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:09, archived)

poor eeyore, always sad

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:11, archived)

                                          _
              .--"""  /                  { `.__
             (       (      _   .e"8a-.  J  '  \
              `.._,   \    /_`\/8P '.--\/8P-'   )
 .-.             \   e8a   `.`. `" / o o`._..--'
(;88`-..          \    ""`.  `--.#--.._/  `.-.
 `8_  8P`.         :_e8P .a.  _.' |`\_, \  /-.
    `.` ,8          ^P" e8P 8a    2 '7.__7" \      cheer up you cunt
      \ `":          `.    ,8P _ /_\ '  /
       ;e8|            98P  .-' `7  `--'
       |`8: .e8a._..e8"   .'    :
       :   88P" .8P`88,8P'     /
        Y8/88  eP"| `YP"      /
        `. `M  "  :-.       .'
         :      .'_  ;   _.'
          \ \  '.' `/_.-e8`,.--.
           `-: :  .'""  "  8P   :
              `""`.e8a          ;
                   `"""--.     /   
                          `---'

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:16, archived)

Seems about right

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:11, archived)

Mods are posting nsfw gifs without warning, so it's a free for all

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:13, archived)

it wasn't even a real boob!

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:33, archived)

That's what she said

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:35, archived)

still wanked

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:43, archived)

yours?

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:14, archived)

+ *checks profile*
yours
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:18, archived)

<s> contents

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:45, archived)

Helmit Kohl

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:17, archived)

This is dumb for even your Talk/efforts.
Show some respect to those who still have some time and love this place.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:17, archived)

looks like a squashed moomin

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:18, archived)

That's what she said

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:24, archived)

bored of this now

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:54, archived)

French pet chat?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:00, archived)

mais bien sur, mon petit souris

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:11, archived)

i've only just realised this isn't ghostace from spirited away

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 14:10, archived)

What's in your manifesto?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:20, archived)

my fucken penus and helmit

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:23, archived)

I'll spoil your ballot, if you know what I mean

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:24, archived)

talk about rotten borough

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:24, archived)

and free breakfast and after school clubs for infants and primaries

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:24, archived)

could they have them overnight a couple of nights a week and all?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:25, archived)

depends on the school

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:26, archived)

you wouldn't be the first politician to fuck the country

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:24, archived)

^satire

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:27, archived)

i
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:28, archived)

This *points at crotch*

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:23, archived)

stains from this morning's egg bap?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:25, archived)

Woah, this is oxford. Marmalade from my croissant

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:28, archived)

It's all about avocadoes on toast these days m8.
If you run down the shops and buy some you might be able to have some on fathers day weekend.
( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:32, archived)

I had a breakfast burrito with smashed avocado at some fancy place in London when I saw my brother the other week.
It was fantastic
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:36, archived)

Yeah, it is really nice.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:40, archived)

i recently saw how guacamole is made
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/15/3d/5c/153d5cdb522c761f0a2a2560c6e9228d.jpg
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:43, archived)

Santa Maria

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:44, archived)

Uh, Nsfw. Someone mod this

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:46, archived)

it's martial law in here, today
sorry. i mean marshall law. from tekken
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:08, archived)

hwaaaaah!
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:09, archived)

so Stephen Merchant is responsible for it

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:50, archived)

like so many things

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:08, archived)

free heroin

(dozers You big spazzer!, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:24, archived)

black prostitutes for all

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:25, archived)

COR!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:25, archived)

it's a click from me!

(dozers You big spazzer!, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:27, archived)

fanny mess-to, more like

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:26, archived)

Laboured

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:28, archived)

clarkson for pm

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:27, archived)

privately-educated millionaire racist Jeremy Clarkson?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:28, archived)

yeah, why not

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:28, archived)

he says what we're all thinking

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:29, archived)

American cars are shit?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:31, archived)

even the old shelby cars?

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:41, archived)

old fords bashed together by monkeys for straight line speed at the expense of handling

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:42, archived)

Gt40 mate

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:45, archived)

only cos the Brits were involved
la-la-la-la-Lola
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:48, archived)

Yeah, just posted below.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:50, archived)

i like the daytona

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:50, archived)

one did it's job in beating the ferrari tho, and they seem to be quite popular

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:45, archived)

I don't doubt their popularity, and I wouldn't turn my nose up at one
but the Americans have never been one for technical excellence; they just do basic stuff on a much larger scale. 4litre V8s that put out less than 200hp ffs.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:47, archived)

Wasn't the le mans winner built in England though?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:50, archived)

I discovered the Nissan pao the other day and am now oddly taken by them.
It's like a fiat panda gone wrong.
( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:42, archived)

Anything modelled after a Fiat is doomed

(Boiled_Tater is not the messiah, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:47, archived)

pictures mostly
tbh it was all a bit last minute and no one really bothers to read all that shit I write
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:28, archived)

Compulsory participation in online arguments.
monster munch: making Britain ^upset again.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:29, archived)

I don't see a difference in a "none of the above" option and not voting at all.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:33, archived)

with not voting it is impossible to tell the difference between protest and apathy
which is also why munchy is wrong about spoilt papers

a 'none of the above' option is only worth it if it means that none of the above get in, in the event that a majority choose that
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:39, archived)

Shut up hippy

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:40, archived)

It's hard to tell anyway because people who don't feel represented are going to be less inclined to get off their arses and make their displeasure counted, as it ultimately doesn't count for much.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:41, archived)

Spoiled ballots carry as much weight as not voting, ie none.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:51, archived)

but they are counted

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 13:26, archived)

Not voting is not participating.
Voting "None Of The Above" indicates your dissatisfaction with the candidates on offer. Like I said, though, I've not really thought through what a win for "None Of The Above" would mean.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:45, archived)

s4.b3ta.com/host/creative/23553/1426182712/5566593914112252665902.jpg
( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:29, archived)

VOTE MONGY!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:35, archived)

Voting for this

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:39, archived)

Phwoar, I wouldn't mind checking HER prostate

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:43, archived)

ummm

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:46, archived)

I know, a sexy thought, right?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:47, archived)

a free shag with rita ora or tom hardy

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:30, archived)

I bet she's filth.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:33, archived)

#maninfesto

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:30, archived)

ManiFARTo more like

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:33, archived)

My manifesto would just be a screen, showing this video on a loop
www.youtube.com/watch?v=w7x_lWJNnNg
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:38, archived)

death to unbelievers

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:40, archived)

Politics thread!
So, who did everyone vote for?
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:37, archived)

www.lemonparty.org
( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:38, archived)

NONE OF THE ABOVE
You know, like Richard Pryor
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:42, archived)

Bit racist

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:44, archived)

he really was

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:53, archived)

Haven't voted yet, doing it after work as my polling station is on the way home

( H.B.Mupps, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:43, archived)

^

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:45, archived)

Fuck right off mate.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:43, archived)

You're welcome mate

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:01, archived)

the monster raving fuck off 2 cans

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:44, archived)

Charles D. B. King

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:44, archived)

The Fat Chips at Maccy D's Party

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:47, archived)

i don't want to brexit anymore

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:51, archived)

if only Maccy D's had got involved in the referendum
you'd see what you little englanders are missing out on from the continent.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:53, archived)

^infest

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:04, archived)

I'll nip round after work and squander my vote on either Labour or the LibDems.
Thanks, First Past The Post! I really love having a Tory as my MP!
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:50, archived)

Check out North Thanet's previous election results
www.bbc.com/news/politics/constituencies/E14000852#election2015-logo

Clearly a hotbed of festering labour activists.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:57, archived)

:'( 70% between the Tories and UKIP:
www.bbc.co.uk/news/politics/constituencies/E14000949#election2015-logo
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:03, archived)

You got a new neighbor momu?

(Roger McGough-Pipe, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:10, archived)

Yeah, the Cleggs moved in, last week.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:12, archived)

jesus

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:02, archived)

he's the king of kings, that's about as undemocratic as you can get

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:07, archived)

testify, brother!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:09, archived)

looks a bit drizzly out so I probably won't bother

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:08, archived)

i read that if you don't vote you are not allowed to talk for the next 5 years about anything

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:10, archived)

It's sort of a moot point.
If the Tories stay in, you won't be able to talk about anything on the internet any more anyway.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:13, archived)

Won't matter when the food wars start

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:17, archived)

Seems reasonable.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:21, archived)

I'm not much of a talker

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:25, archived)

let your tongue fool around?

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:31, archived)

yeah

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:39, archived)

not gone out yet,
just got out the bath, but i'm seriously considering a strategic Labour vote, otherwise it would be SNP obviously
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:31, archived)

the bbc kept saying that some of your lot were considering voting tory to prevent another independence referendum
I thought you'd all vowed never to do that
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:36, archived)

by "my lot" do you mean "Scottish people"
or "SNP voters"? Cos i can tell you one thing, what you've just said is exactly what the Tory leaflets tell us to do.

They don't have an awful lot else to say for themselves tbh, they even prefer to put Ruth Davidson's picture on instead of the actual candidate, it's all a bit weird.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:46, archived)

Both Labour and the Tories have sent leaflets claiming "we're the only ones who can stop the SNP"

(Roger McGough-Pipe, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:00, archived)

yep.
they're both just competing to be the ones to represent Not Wanting Independence, which is a sorry state of affairs really, i want to vote Labour because of Jeremy Corbyn and his manifesto, not because of British Identitarianism. I stopped by their office the other day to tell them that.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:03, archived)

I mean scotch people
I suppose with life expectancy being what it is up there, there aren't many left who remember the poll tax etc.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:25, archived)

there's always been some degree of conservatism in Scotland,
but after Labour's humiliation at the last election and the SNP taking on the left-wing mantle, the Tories here are positioning themselves as the true Unionist opposition.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:29, archived)

I'd probably do that and want to see labour do well down south but they can get fucked after what they did in the council up here.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:40, archived)

well it's for the only Labour MP in scotland,
who i feel a bit sorry for despite constantly putting me off him on Twitter, he's a good MP but he really ought to tone down the "vote for me to stop the SNP" schtick.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:50, archived)

New Salmond, New Danger.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:06, archived)

In the bath at half eleven in the morning? You certainly sound like a Labour voter

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:59, archived)

It's probably of the tin variety, northern poors.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:00, archived)

Just had the epc guy turn up, unexpectedly
Nice guy. MASSIVE nerd. AMA.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:35, archived)

what's a epc?

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:36, archived)

computer repair man from Yorkshire

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:37, archived)

Well I did make a twat of myself
I misheard him when he came to the door, thinking that he said something about the PC. First I told him he'd got the wrong house, then when he read my address and said my wife's name, I got ready to chew him out. Then he got confused and said 'no, I'm hear to check the energy rating'. Felt like a right cunt.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:39, archived)

"chew him out" *crying laughing emoji*

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:43, archived)

What is the satisfactory equivalent?
I meant it to mean 'tell him to go away because I believe he is trying to rob me somehow'
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:46, archived)

oh you actually meant to type that,
i thought it was autocorrect shenanigans or somesuch, never heard the phrase before
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:47, archived)

Ah, I see
Yes, it's what all the kids are saying. At least, I think that's what they're saying.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:48, archived)

it sounds a bit like
something you might do to a lady between the sheets
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:51, archived)

I'm shocked by this
shocked and disappointed
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:53, archived)

is it not normally 'chewed my ears off' or 'chewed his ears off' not sure you should be chewing people out , pervert

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:51, archived)

It does sound dirty, doesn't it
I regret saying it now. Why couldn't I have just said "I was about to give him a piece of my mind"? Everyone would've understood what I meant, and this confusion would never have occurred.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:54, archived)

you could have torn him off a strip

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:56, archived)

Ah, of course

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:19, archived)

lol you've reminded me of that aussie sports reporter who was ranting about a colleague and vowing to 'pull his fucking ears'.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:58, archived)

Nothing, what's a epc with you? hahahaha
Energy Perfomance Register. It hasn't been done in years, and we need it if we're going to sell the house. Just checking windows and insulation, etc.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:37, archived)

Shit in his briefcase

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:39, archived)

He had a satchel
and camo shorts. And a long beard. And had (what is apparently called) a 'daith' piercing.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:41, archived)

I wouldn't have let him in the house looking like that

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:44, archived)

He bamboozled me with acronyms :(

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:47, archived)

That's EPR
EPC register, I should've said
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:43, archived)

how does he feel that once awarded a breeeam certificate that the buildings will never be inspected again and can therefore make changes to increase the carbon footprint with risk?

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:40, archived)

you'd have to ask him yourself

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:42, archived)

ooooooooooooooh

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:42, archived)

looks like he's to scared to learn the truth

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:44, archived)

scam Britain strikes again

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:45, archived)

there you go

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:42, archived)

you only care because bream is a type of fish

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:44, archived)

snotty cunts, i don't even take them out of the water just unhook them, i unhooked one and dropped the bait, stupid cunt went to eat it again

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:49, archived)

how do you know he was a massive nerd?

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:18, archived)

Now we're talking
He said that he's hoping to get his appointments finished quickly today, as he has two different LARP weapons to repair. One of which is a two handed sword, the high density foam blade of which has started to come away from the metal core.

He also quoted Hitchhikers at one point. I am not kidding.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:23, archived)

wow
yeah, that's a nerd alright!
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:30, archived)

oh, you did see it
Yeah, he was a good lad.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:43, archived)

we can't discuss who voted for who under article 66A of the Representation of the People Act 1983

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:39, archived)

well that's that then, I suppose

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:42, archived)

Oh, which pricks voted for that then?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:00, archived)

Theresa May
But they named the research vessel after David Attenborough
The full title was Theresa May Day May Day Arrrggggghhhhhhh Alluhu Ackbar

I thought it might make a good call sign when they're coming in to port
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:52, archived)

huh?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:55, archived)

eh?

( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:05, archived)

S. Baldrick, Dunny on the Wold

( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 12:01, archived)

Can we not have a boring politics thread today of all days.
Facebook is already a fucking no go for the day.
I don't care if you vote, no one cares. Shut up.

What are you thinking of treating yourself to? I'm quite tempted to buy a bike motorbike, the little one is fun, but I'm starting to miss getting over 60mph.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:10, archived)

need to get the beemer a paintjob
that'll be fun
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:10, archived)

I said treat mate

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:16, archived)

he could get a mcdonalds afterwards

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:21, archived)

i bet they have some exotic stuff in poland maccys

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:24, archived)

Beer in France, Italy and Spain

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:26, archived)

cool, what time?

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:27, archived)

half two?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:28, archived)

can we get a maccys in poland, i want the big mac with the bacon in, and whatever the fuck this is
mcdonalds.pl/oferta/sniadania/kajzerka-wieloziarnista-jajko-i-pieczarki/?pokaz=wszystko
( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:31, archived)

some fancy polish sausage probably
you know what they're like
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:31, archived)

Disgusting.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:34, archived)

Kajzerki is the name of the bread roll (swirly top with spices on)
It's basically a veggie mcMuffin: grilled mushrooms, an egg, spreadable cheddar cheese, rucola and 'sandwich sauce'.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:35, archived)

that sounds quite nice.
The spicy veggie wrap is basically some flat veggie pakora in a wrap.
( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:36, archived)

do they stop doing breakfast at 1030 too? as i've missed todays already

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:37, archived)

dunno, last time I had one was August 15th last year
and that's a bank holiday
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:40, archived)

what's the excitement about grrr?
mcdonalds.pl/big-mac-bacon/?utm_source=mcdonalds.pl&utm_medium=slider&utm_campaign=big-mac-bacon
( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:41, archived)

Celebrating 25 years in Poland
Queues out the door when they opened the first one in Poland, which is just down the road from me.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:45, archived)

clicked translate and it came up as 'kaiser roll'

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:44, archived)

I barely go there these days, but they still do a wiesmac
are chicken wings available in a normal macdonalds?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:32, archived)

no wings over here

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:34, archived)

oriental beef wrap?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:35, archived)

not seen one, looking at the polish website i think they are having a party or something, big mac with bacon in, go get one

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:36, archived)

Pig country innit, bacon in everything

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:37, archived)

the battered broccoli is just wrong, but they have launched fat chips, it's all go in maccys over there

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:40, archived)

that's brocolli abuse, there ought to be a support hotline for victims

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:41, archived)

I'm hoping to treat myself to a bigger house
'How big' depends on what people are willing to pay for this place
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:13, archived)

11p probably!
hahaha 11p
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:13, archived)

11p lol

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:15, archived)

I've seen ham that's more expensive than that house.

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:16, archived)

I'm thinking of making my current house a bigger house
seems a bit less hassle to move the family out for a few weeks than to have to move all of our possessions
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:24, archived)

Just move your family out, the place will seem bigger as you'll need less space.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:24, archived)

I'll do it for $500

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:25, archived)

Definitely
Unfortunately that option isn't really open to me. It'd be a damn sight cheaper if it was.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:25, archived)

nice work
my Dad openly shows his clients the material costs, his labour costs and his expected profit. Clients lap it up, even though the labour is his fucking profit in the first place, so he just whacks 3-5k on top for giggles and they always cough up.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:36, archived)

There's a nice car automobile I've got my eye on

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:13, archived)

Fancy. What colour?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:16, archived)

Stripped, phwoar

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:18, archived)

Phwoar

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:20, archived)

nintendo switch
by having a zero hour contract and never going on holiday, i've accrued 108 hours of leave. gonna cash some in and buy a children's toy. yeah!
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:15, archived)

I'd like a switch.
There's a few second hand knocking about on gumtree
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:17, archived)

it'll be interesting to see what gets announced at e3

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:21, archived)

I don't even follow it anymore. I just don't play enough to worry about new releases.
Just have a look on Amazon every couple of months for older stuff that people have said was good.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:26, archived)

wee wee more like

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:26, archived)

This is a good question,
as I've got a bit of spare cash at the moment and a bit more coming in in the near future. I might splurge a couple of grand on a proper gamer PC, especially as a mate owns a computer shop and could probably do me a good price on one.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:16, archived)

Yeah, i miss pc gaming,
I enjoy the ease of just sticking the console on and off you go, but it's not the same.
What sort of thing you be looking at? Some of the 4k render stuff looks amazing.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:20, archived)

I haven't had a proper look at specs or anything yet.
A couple of months ago I bumped up my existing setup to 12 Gb of RAM and it still wheezed and fell over when I tried to run DOOM on it, so it looks like I'll be going maximum hardcore on as many specs as poss.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:24, archived)

The new doom was good fun,
Very much like an old shooter. Story was a bit janky, but that wasn't really a problem.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:26, archived)

I didn't get on with it
Until I remembered that the way to play Doom, is to just run screaming until you get to the end.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:28, archived)

Yeah, takes a bit of getting used to when modern games are so tactical and cover based.
That feeling when you enter a room full of ammo and armour and you know there's a big stupid fight coming up.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:35, archived)

lol
When I first played Skyrim, I would get to a big door, and there's not only loads of health potions lying around, but a crafting table and the ingredients to make MORE health potions. You just know that something REALLY nasty is on the other side of that door.
( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:37, archived)

Is there a mod where you can defeat the monsters by talking to them and getting them to open up about their feelings?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:38, archived)

sounds like you should play undertale, ma8

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 11:16, archived)

All of this is exactly why I want to play DOOM in the first place.
I could never be arsed with all those hyper-realistic CoD-style games (actually more because gaming is my most internet autism-y thing and I'd a million times rather play on my own than with other people). Painkiller was my go-to mindless shooter for ages but it's worn a bit thin by now.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:39, archived)

Couple of grand? You won't need that much unless you're buying all top of the range stuff
I could spec you one up if you want
( H.B.Mupps, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:47, archived)

I treated myself to about 15 things at the edinburgh fringe and a record cleaning machine this week.
I'm tempted to buy an old quad amplifier but keep not bothering to.

Gonna buy an LP by the funk band lettuce. Only seems to be on sale in america and with shipping it comes to about $40 which is a bit steep.
( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:20, archived)

I'd liked that lettuce thing you posted the other day.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:24, archived)

Yeah, that's what I was thinking of getting.
They're good. Silly name aside.
( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:25, archived)

Dear Slippery Mick,
Thank you for recommending OSMC.

Yours,
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:27, archived)

No problem, got it all set up alright then?

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:28, archived)

piece of piss really
even auto-detected my NAS and works with the Kore app, so I was watching movies on it in about half an hour.

I need to find some skins/add-ons to make music playback a bit more user friendly though. I want a big grid of all my albums, not endless nested folders.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:40, archived)

I think it'll natively do that once you have it index your music.
There's a 'library' view and a 'files' view.

Have you tried Exodus and SALTS for telly/film streaming? they have most stuff on there.
( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:44, archived)

not properly fiddled with it yet
but that's the sort of stuff I'd be after, ta. The TV itself can already do Netflix and Youtube.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:46, archived)

Now go onto one of the kodi support forums and see how popular Sam Nazarko isn't.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:36, archived)

Who is he and why has he upset them?

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:38, archived)

The kid who maintains OSMC.
People get upset because he's monetised their open source project, I think.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:41, archived)

I'm going to treat myself to a ruddy great drink once I finish this course of antibiotics

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:22, archived)

excuse your french!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:24, archived)

I'm glad you haven't died.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:27, archived)

might've been better if I had

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:59, archived)

I'm going to go shopping for a better deal on life insurance.
Not what I'd call a treat, but I'll feel better for sorting it out. Likewise, I need to get a will written (if only so I can disinherit my daughter).
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:27, archived)

I've just got life insurance and critical illness cover sorted.
Sounds stupid but it's a weight off my mind knowing no matter what happens to me, ladypig will be alright
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:34, archived)

I neglected to cancel a policy from a couple of mortgages back, so I've been thrown away money on a monthly basis.
I'm also not convinced that I need that Critical Illness cover that I've been paying for.
Exciting stuff!
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:47, archived)

lets face it, you're worth more to your family dead.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:51, archived)

I'm very aware of this,
but I've made all my children swear that they'll avenge my death, so they can only do me in if they all agree to it.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 10:58, archived)

morning

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 7:24, archived)

Motorbike started first kick this morning.
This is a good sign for the rest of the day.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 7:56, archived)

which bike?
nice to hear it's holding fuel pressure
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 7:58, archived)

The 175
I've barely started on the 250. I've got the wiring loom done, and the tank you got me is stripped and primed, but the rain has slowed me down as I've got nowhere in doors to paint.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:08, archived)

yeah, paintings bollocks like that
even in a garage the moisture gets in and contaminates the surface, especially if you've user filler cos it sucks it up faster than a dockside whore. Never again.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:09, archived)

Ha, I took it down to a bloke on the estate and he put it in some machine that sucked the dents out.
Or blew the dents out.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:11, archived)

IBHD
TDOB
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:31, archived)

Happy World Brain Tumor Day

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:29, archived)

my cat died from that
well, no, she died from the lethal injection, but my point still stands.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:30, archived)

Accessory to murder^

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:47, archived)

i demand a return of the sunshine, it is a basic human right in june

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:33, archived)

come over here, not a cloud in the sky

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:38, archived)

what's the mercury hitting?

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:42, archived)

20 today, 24 tomoz

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:45, archived)

not bad, bit cool for my tastes

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:47, archived)

24's over my acceptance threshold
but Imma get drunk at a wedding this weekend to compensate
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:00, archived)

the storms and wind have been scaring the cat :(

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:44, archived)

well that's just not on at all

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:47, archived)

sunshine mack
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:54, archived)

Mornin'
Bleedin' transport delays and no bleedin' information for love nor money. It's enough to make a man have a second cup of tea.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:35, archived)

theresa's fault, VOTE LABOUR

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:38, archived)

*nods*
'Sup?
( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:38, archived)

you're up early

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:38, archived)

I'm always up at 6
Gives me time for breakfast, shower, etc before going to make breakfast for the mad auntie
( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 8:44, archived)

alright

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:06, archived)

yer, you?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:08, archived)

not bad for a young'un

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:13, archived)

Morning.
My daughter wants me to "vote for Theresa May". Her brothers have both switched from Green to Labour, so I'm claiming a 66% success rate as a parent.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:06, archived)

is your daughter a fucking idiot or just a spoilt brat?

( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:09, archived)

They've all based their decision on who will let them spend less time in school,
so talk of "cuts to education" has been the vote winner, for her.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:13, archived)

That's just the influence of dominatrix lesbian porn

( mongychops, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:09, archived)

at least you'll only have to help fund your sons through university if she gets her way
as a neoliberal your daughter should provide for herself
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:10, archived)

No doubt paying for her education will fall under the "boy jobs" heading.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:15, archived)

liberal
provide alter the matrix to create wealth
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:43, archived)

tell your children this is big boys shit and not to get involved

( $$ ✅, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:15, archived)

"I'll tell you what's not for turning. THIS!"

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:22, archived)

When she grows up, insist she retrospectively pays for all the food she ate as a child.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:48, archived)

I should put a lock on the fridge, until she starts contributing to the household finances.
I'd send her back, if I could.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:50, archived)

Yeah. If she's hungry she's just not working hard enough.

( Slippery Mick &#8207;, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:56, archived)

Hey, hey, we're the Mornings
And people say we morning around
But we're too busy morning
To morning anybody down
( H.B.Mupps, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:48, archived)

morning

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:55, archived)

hello love

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 9:58, archived)

Knock Knock.
Avon, your bell's fucked.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 1:08, archived)

Bollocks.

( AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Thu 8 Jun 2017, 6:36, archived)