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# Xmas in the heart of darkness
(I helped save b3ta! kinks rock over London, rock on Chicago, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:22, archived)
# actuall real, honest-to goodness choking
even though i knew what was coming
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:23, archived)
# loosen the belt and lose the clementine then.
;-)
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:23, archived)
# is 'lose the clementine' a euphemism?
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:25, archived)
# Not really.
I've never been very good at them. Call a cock a cock, I do.

I was hinting (in not such a roundabout way) that you are in fact, 'pulling a Hutchence'.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:26, archived)
# aha
gotcha

na, that's not really my thing, behbeh
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:28, archived)
# I could never get it right, it just put me off.
Too worried about dying.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:29, archived)
# not tried
if it ain't broke, don't fix it

wanking is supposed to be fairly straightforward
if you need equipment, you probably ought to get out more
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:30, archived)
# There's nothing wrong with equipment.
I'm a sexual explorer, me.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:32, archived)
# i'm a sexual armchair philosopher:
lots of opinion, no real practical skills
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:34, archived)
# well you've got two bits of proof that show you've got the basics down...
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:35, archived)
# knowing how to boil an egg
doesn't make you a chef
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:41, archived)
# That's why you need equipment!
Poles! Straps! Hammers!
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:42, archived)
# It will stop you starving though
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:42, archived)
# Speaking of which, I have pie for dinner.
Awesome.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:45, archived)
# I had pizza for dinner last night with many, many jalapenos on it before beddybyes
I woke up at 4am and felt like I had swallowed many, many screwdrivers and set squares.

Bad idea.
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:48, archived)
# I can't do chilis
Make the poor Captain ill, so they do.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:56, archived)
# not if you run out of eggs
i have no idea what i mean
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:45, archived)
# You've got years yet.
You'll get bored of omlettes before the end of it, and you'll be surrounded by....chickens.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:46, archived)
# And empty shells.
And lots of corn.
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:49, archived)
# And a tractor.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:57, archived)
# it might be worth it in the end then :)
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:59, archived)
# Can you drive a tractor?
Bet you can.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:00, archived)
# yes
but only a really old forson major
none of your fancy new ones
www.rttuk.co.uk/Assets/Images/fordson_major_large_restored.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:02, archived)
# knew you could though.
Ooooh, we've gone all vertical.

*stretches*
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:03, archived)
# You people are weird.
and strangely arousing...

why do you all have to be foreigners and of strange pursuasions?

curse you, foul-handed fate!
(I helped save b3ta! Ratsta, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:03, archived)
# We are arousing.
You should see us when we're all in one room. It's like hot sex marmalade.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:05, archived)
# Oh my!
*has a sit down and a nice cut of tea and tries not to think about marmalade*
(I helped save b3ta! Ratsta, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:08, archived)
# I want to join in
on the worlds widest thread!
(Fiddlers Elbow says the world will end on, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 23:01, archived)
# i think you will find, sir
that it is you that is foreign

what, what!
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:06, archived)
# don't you find
crampons make a terrible mess of the duvet.
(I helped save b3ta! god save the queen making another unremarkable comeback, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:34, archived)
# Manwife makes more of a mess.
He's terrified of the icepick...
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:35, archived)
# hahaha more appropriate
www.b3ta.com/questions/desperatetimes/post100353
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:33, archived)
# it's almost as if
you're proud of that story :)
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:35, archived)
# My teenage imagination was being directed into the wrong parts of my brain
I could've been a brain surgeon, me.
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:37, archived)
# I'm nicking that excuse.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:42, archived)
# a joy to behold
(I helped save b3ta! god save the queen making another unremarkable comeback, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:36, archived)
# My plan to kill you almost worked.
(I helped save b3ta! kinks rock over London, rock on Chicago, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:23, archived)
# ^that must've done the job.
(I helped save b3ta! xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c., Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:24, archived)
# I have had an extra 3 minutes worth of life added to me :)
All from the laughing I've done just now.
(I helped save b3ta! xihpete A neutrino walks straight through a bar, with v>c., Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:24, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! Shada, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:24, archived)
# LOL
:D
THIS IS WONDERFABOULOUS!
*CLICK*
(I helped save b3ta! SkUG >_O i got a couple of stitches in my eyeball... ow, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:24, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Sunshine Elephant, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:25, archived)
# Is this the god of caramacs?
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:25, archived)
# Pfffft =P
(I helped save b3ta! MrPineapple .co.uk - TSHIRTS FOR SALE. I GIVE YOU GOOD PRICE., Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:25, archived)
# That's an exceedingly good mental image.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:27, archived)
# Mr. Kipling sues b3ta.
Tomorrows site news.
(I helped save b3ta! MrPineapple .co.uk - TSHIRTS FOR SALE. I GIVE YOU GOOD PRICE., Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:37, archived)
# Fuck him. Fuck him and his overpriced cakes.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:39, archived)
# I'd fuck him for a battenberg.
I'd fuck anything for a battenberg.
(I helped save b3ta! MrPineapple .co.uk - TSHIRTS FOR SALE. I GIVE YOU GOOD PRICE., Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:46, archived)
# Even Thatcher?
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:00, archived)
# Hahaha
I'm going to click this as much as I possibly can =]
(I helped save b3ta! MrPineapple .co.uk - TSHIRTS FOR SALE. I GIVE YOU GOOD PRICE., Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:25, archived)
# hahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa!

(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:28, archived)
# TREBLE THUMBS UP!
in fact:
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:30, archived)
# hi cockalorum!
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:42, archived)
# hi cockalorum!

Hello GMoS, you well?
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:42, archived)
# yeah, I'm skimming the surface of awesome
how're you?
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:43, archived)
# Sounds goood
I'm okay, thanks
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:49, archived)
# oh my.
it's good to see your name,
and to see the new hair, although i do miss the mohican.
(I helped save b3ta! Sunshine Elephant, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:45, archived)
# I miss it too,
still it was fun whilst it lasted :)
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:47, archived)
# i hope you kept it in a bag.
(I helped save b3ta! Sunshine Elephant, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:47, archived)
# I use it to make impromptu moustaches
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:58, archived)
# Ahhhhh
That made me laugh so much.
(I helped save b3ta! Killerkitti Like my coffee black, just like my metal, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:54, archived)
# teehee
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:01, archived)
# For a tiny second,
I thought it was the pope rising up.

However, this is equally ,if not more, fantastic.
(I helped save b3ta! Fluffy elephants, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:31, archived)
# Apocalypse now would've been improved if the pope was in it
at least 2 times more than he is.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:36, archived)
# Yes, and vice versa
the pope would be at least 5 times as cool if he was in Apocalypse Now
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:41, archived)
# I like that we can also pretend it's Charlie
for double christ-that's-great goodness
(I helped save b3ta! hanke murphy, I'm a mess, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:34, archived)
# *sings familiar Ultravox song*
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:40, archived)
# Reap the wild wind?!
(I helped save b3ta! kinks rock over London, rock on Chicago, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:42, archived)
# Wanking with tears in my eyes
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:43, archived)
#
PARP!
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:43, archived)
# Hello chap

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:50, archived)
# bon soiree moiyan amis
;)
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:53, archived)
# Who are you calling moyenne?
;)
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:00, archived)
# superb!
(I helped save b3ta! Bloop Fri 16 Jul, 22:10, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:52, archived)
# teh aargh.
magnificent, sir
(I helped save b3ta! plentyofants more ghee, vicar?, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:52, archived)
# good
one!
(Harryhausens working plasticine since the 30´s, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:55, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! @man move along, nothing to see here on, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 21:56, archived)
# That gets an Apocalpyse Woo!

(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:00, archived)
# Top.
(I helped save b3ta! Tart Monkey, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:51, archived)
# i came,
i saw,
(i fuckin lol'd)
i *clicked*
(I helped save b3ta! Zank Frappa Who let the lefties in?, Mon 19 Nov 2007, 22:57, archived)
# Best thing EVER!
I bow before thee
(I helped save b3ta! Flash_Bastard, Tue 20 Nov 2007, 23:22, archived)