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# New series. Ross Kemp is shown an array of male members and shares his opinions....


Award winning stuff!
(JoePesky, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:37, archived)
# Hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:38, archived)
# LENSFLARETITS

He obviously doesn't know cocks. Those pubes are not according to regulation.
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:38, archived)
# ha ha ha
loon
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:38, archived)
# haha
i was thinking similar things
(I helped save b3ta! monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:39, archived)
# thinking them's no good
you've got to sing them until your throat is sore
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:40, archived)
# Perhaps he thinks the 3D effect shading makes up for the pube excess
(I helped save b3ta! my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:40, archived)
# Oh my friends
let us no stray down that path.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:42, archived)
# I can't say I agree with him,
I'm just trying to understand his thinking
(I helped save b3ta! my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:44, archived)
# Never speak of this again.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:44, archived)
# I have failed the Gods of the Three Pube Rule.
(I helped save b3ta! my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:46, archived)
# Absolutely.
Here we see a classic pube-per-bollock imbalance which could so easily have been avoided by following the simple, time-honoured rules.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:41, archived)
# Could this be a new form of modern art?
Perhaps we're just not sophisticated enough to appreciate it.
(I helped save b3ta! cowcat Bituminous squeegee, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:45, archived)
# No, it's just WRONG
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:56, archived)
# You are talking bollocks again, Medi
(I helped save b3ta! Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:58, archived)
# I am, aren't I?

it's the only way I know
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:01, archived)
# And we wouldn't have it any other way
*manhugs*
(I helped save b3ta! Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:03, archived)
# :)
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:12, archived)
# I would like to make his head into a bell end
Get him blind drunk and then tattoo it on
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:38, archived)
# It's a suitable canvas
Comme ça:
Breakfast
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:41, archived)
# Like breakfast
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:44, archived)
# Stupid arse quick reply eating my links
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:46, archived)
# That is the strangest looking form of a picture of breakfast, ever
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:49, archived)
# What commitment to looking like a twat.
I salute that man!

'noongles Miss
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:50, archived)
# Noongles Squire Doom
:)
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:51, archived)
# *doffs feathered cap*
*prances around in tights*

Verily the noon doth bring the fairest of the board,
With Otterbys and Trellises, a b3ta smorgasboard,
A Prodigy is grumpy, but oft with reason true,
While Pasanonic, SmashMonkey and Wow turn the air blue,
Prof UnderCover doles out the weird,
As does dear Discomeats,
Sometimes you'll hear a Neville, "broam! Pipes!" and things he bleats,
But time is short at this fair hour, the gayshift doth approach,
I've not had time to even mention saintly HappyToast,
As TGA and JPG slope off to cosy homes,
Keep pressing F5, F5, don't let your browser roam.

:)
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:59, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:00, archived)
# *grabs lute*
*thinks better of it*
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:02, archived)
# Please tell me you really have a lute?
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:08, archived)
# I considered it...
Then Sting released a lute album.
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:16, archived)
# ha ha!
Woo! Great stuff, sir!
(I helped save b3ta! Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:02, archived)
# Why thank ye kindly.
I'm not sure why I felt moved to poetry, but next time I'll try and include even more people... :)
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:05, archived)
# *crosses palm with silver*
(I helped save b3ta! Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:08, archived)
# *notes and appreciates*
You shall be first onto the spaceship when the mech-flnorts arrive to take over.
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:13, archived)
# This needs writing out on parchment
And taking to EVERY bash
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:03, archived)
# *blushes*
thank ye greatly fair maid of Milton.
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:08, archived)
# JPG?
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:06, archived)
# Gruntfuttock
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:09, archived)
# Ah!
(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:10, archived)
# Ah! Pedanti!
*notes in big book of regulars for later epic version of the above*
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:12, archived)
# Hehe
epic.
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:13, archived)
# Its the B3ta equivalent of Homer's Odyssey...
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:18, archived)
# Bless you, sir.
I've never really thought of my home as 'cosy'. More 'needs tidying'.

;-)
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:14, archived)
# clutter and mess = cosy in my book.
Thus my home is a little TOO cosy for human habitation...
(I helped save b3ta! Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:20, archived)
# sycophant!
(I helped save b3ta! Zank Frappa Who let the lefties in?, Sat 25 Apr 2009, 17:33, archived)
# I'm liking b3ta this afternoon
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:39, archived)
# did you not like it yesterday?
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:41, archived)
# I wasn't around much yesterday
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:42, archived)
# it was even better yesterday
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:43, archived)
# I thought it was quite good this morning
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:57, archived)
# No I didn't
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:42, archived)
# thats cos Mrs Trellis wasn't here
(I helped save b3ta! twig Save 6 Music, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:43, archived)
# \o/
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:46, archived)
# yes
and the fact I had to calm someone down, due to a post
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:52, archived)
# Don't be here after 7pm then
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:41, archived)
# No?
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:42, archived)
# The nutters appear and then people get upset
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:43, archived)
# :(
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:44, archived)
# ^^^^ :((((((((((((((
(I helped save b3ta! epiphany coming live from sweden, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:48, archived)
# These are hurtful lies
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:46, archived)
# lets face it, we are all nutters to some degree
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:50, archived)
# well I suppose my family does have a history of mental illness
but I'm pretty functional
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:51, archived)
# ^
dis
(I helped save b3ta! Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:04, archived)
# I have seen this
I have also seen a lot of lovely work :D
(Mrs Trellis GIN, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:46, archived)
# nutters?
excellent!

*grabs ringside seat*
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:47, archived)
# I like the nutters

correction: I love the nutters
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:57, archived)
# well! jokes on you!
We're here already!

haha

*smears self in lard*

OH MY FUCKING GOD I'M SMEARED IN LARD

*runs out screaming*
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:02, archived)
# That's when we have to sacrifice a member to ward off the impending gayshift
(I helped save b3ta! my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:43, archived)
# ...even though you know it's hopeless.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:46, archived)
# It never seems to work, but it is entertaining
(I helped save b3ta! my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:48, archived)
# Oh, I think we can all agree on that :)
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:49, archived)
# Yeah. Be here for the gayshift. When b3ta gets good.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:44, archived)
# :)
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:45, archived)
# Ning glomp smoosh other faggy crap.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:51, archived)
# *enclickles*
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:52, archived)
# :) Ta! Today for lunch I ate excrement.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:55, archived)
#
Today for lunch I ATE POISON!
(Jeru War and Piss, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:57, archived)
# He is angry and ALSO: wig
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:05, archived)
# Today for lunch I ate myself
I then puked myself back up because I had work to do
(I helped save b3ta! Shlvng, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:04, archived)
# this is wonderful truth
(I helped save b3ta! gronkpan @vomitinglarry.bsky.social, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:47, archived)
# I wish I could gayshift more
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:58, archived)
# compo anything about a copper day
seems to be working well
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:55, archived)
# happy b3taday!
you grumpy old git... ;)
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:03, archived)
# ta.
I'm not the least bit grumpy. More in despair of how people will make themselves look illiterate in a frantic bid to post any old shite on the board ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:09, archived)
# I know...
I had a couple of ideas, but then realised I was essentially just shopping the police, with no dicernable gag, or indeed, compo relevance.

I await inspiration...
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:12, archived)
# hahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:39, archived)
# awww

(I helped save b3ta! Floppy Donkey crawled out of the ditch., Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:39, archived)
# *titters*
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:41, archived)
# even though he's a big plum..I take my hat off to him
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:40, archived)
# Hahahahha!
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:42, archived)
# that's making me laugh more than it probably should :D
(I helped save b3ta! i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:44, archived)
# it hasn't sent you into
labour or anything has it?
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:51, archived)
# *checks gut*



No. No it hasn't. I'll remember to check back here in September though :)
(I helped save b3ta! i_yam_bucket doo wah diddy diddy wah wah diddy doo, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:00, archived)
# at last - something he can speak
about with some authority.

Yay!
(I helped save b3ta! enceladus, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:45, archived)
# Hahahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! epiphany coming live from sweden, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:48, archived)
# ha ha
yes! Woo!
(I helped save b3ta! Ptolemy the man with the silent pea, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:51, archived)
# I'm Ross Kemp
I'm here in fucking france, looking for a baguette, looking for a gang.
(Jeru War and Piss, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:53, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Barry the Time Sprout one of your 5-a-day, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 16:58, archived)
# HAHAHAHA! YES.
(I helped save b3ta! Shlvng, Thu 23 Apr 2009, 17:01, archived)