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In the Jungle

Coming from the depths of the urban jungle.

(Inselect, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:44, archived)

I hope the nice lad Pineapple doesnt mind me

posting his work, but its fantastic... Well done pineapple!

Sozz if its already been posted. I've not been online all day.......

(

Hugo Rune, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:30, archived)

Once at Uni

I told my lecturer that my PC had become infected with a 'March 7th Tourettes Virus'. I stated that it inserts unsavoury words in word docs. "I've done my finest to irradicate all from my thesus, however should any remain, I apologise in advance" I then randomly added 2 'cunts' a 'beast' and 5 'penis's'.

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Your Mum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:41, archived)

hee hee

I think I'll make a web page that automatically tourettes other sites... That'd be fun, and better than real work :)

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Hugo Rune, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:44, archived)

yes yes

do it

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bazman, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 9:01, archived)

Aw shucks

You're welcome to post it.

CUNT!!

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Not Pineapple anymore, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 10:06, archived)

Skoda's return to F1

Proved less than managable on the corners.

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Watty, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:10, archived)

Lookout

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Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:08, archived)

.......................

The very informative Amazonian Brick-Arsed Aristo Cat.

(redifusion, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:46, archived)

Sophie Ellis Bextor

Hello, can there be an sophie ellis bextor photoshop challenge? There are so many pictures in my head fighting to get out its beginning to scare me.

(mooncarrotpie, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:42, archived)

Sattelite Dish

Do them anyway!! We want a looky...

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vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:58, archived)

agreed.

... you don't need a challenge to start sending stuff in.

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rob, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:04, archived)

sophie

has severe 'david coltharding' of the face. i want to do the david cothard / bextor pic. you can all do something else. thanks.

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big daft dave, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:04, archived)

Sophie Ellis-Bextor's dentist poses by scaled down reconstruction of her jaw.

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Your Mum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:20, archived)

ha ha ha

ha har

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big daft dave, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:30, archived)

yum

Sophie Ellis Crepster

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bazman, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:30, archived)

Is this Dada?

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Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:29, archived)

Can someone please post the original 'diddy, dodi, dido dodo' please?

Pur-lease.

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Your Mum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:34, archived)

your wish is my command

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:41, archived)

You really are a god.

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Your Mum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:48, archived)

no, not really

but he is my dad, yay, behold and be blessed

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:57, archived)

theres life in the...

diddy doddy dido dodi dodo joke still.

i'm happy

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:35, archived)

remember that scene in alien

where he does the thing with the knife to the guys hand...have a go yourself here

(

i've got tickets to the first showing of star wars, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:24, archived)

heres the url

http://www.13thstreet.com/site/games/fivefinger/index.jsp

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i've got tickets to the first showing of star wars, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:29, archived)

where?

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mikeisbrill, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:29, archived)

where?

???

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:30, archived)

there

sorry having difficulty today sorting out my posts

(

i've got tickets to the first showing of star wars, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:33, archived)

Internet (f)Art

Apparently, the Guggenheim Museum has paid $20,000 for two java applets to put on its webpage.
You can watch these two examples of Internet art here.

(Shaolin_Bukkake, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:11, archived)

really?

have you got a link to the where it says they paid for it?

(

rob, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:16, archived)

they are not the best things i have seen in the world

and they are slow and unresponsive.

i'd love to get paid 20K for doing shit like that, i'm sure all of us here in the baord could display in the tate modern with creations thats are on the board.(and obviously get tons of money for old f**king rope)

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:20, archived)

absolute shit

really slow, really dull and it crashed IE. $20000? stealing a living! that is just about the worst bit of interactive art i've ever seen, and i've been on a fine art course.

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big daft dave, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:26, archived)

Most of your stuff crashes IE too.

You'd die if I offered you £20k for your work...I reckon the Milliheron is worth an 'Ayrton'. Any bidders?

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Your Mum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:28, archived)

oooooooooooohhh!

You trying to put me out of buisness? the only reason your ie crashes is cos you're always looking at low quality porn mpegs. i rekon milliheron is worth at least 20k. just look at the speed it goes!

(

big daft dave, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:39, archived)

I counted it legs...

999! Your getting slack Mr Dave.
P.s. they may be low quality in terms of technology, but in the world of porn they're diamonds. 'Did you have a horse in your room last night?'

(

Your Mum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:52, archived)

Only rumours.

I think the original article appeared on the New York Times.
I got an article (probably a translation) from the Italian newspaper La Repubblica.
Here insiders are talking about $10k-$15k for each of the two applets.

(Shaolin_Bukkake, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:26, archived)

New board code or not...

...I have still never ever ever seen any kind of option to delete or edit my posts on the board. I have heard others tell of such mythical facilities...

Does one have to be a super-woo-ser admin type person?

(

chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:08, archived)

i think it buggers up

with usernames with spaces, or logging in with capitals or something.

(

rob, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:11, archived)

arse

OK.. I have changed my space to an underscore... lets see what happens!

thanks rob

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chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:16, archived)

log out.

delete cookies.

log back in.

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rob, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:17, archived)

deleted the only b3ta cookie I could see...

will that do it?

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chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:24, archived)

Woo clicky delety!

magic... I now feel so fully-featured.

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chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:29, archived)

R U Sure?

It does not seem to work on Linux...
Could anyone please delete the double message I posted a few lines above???

(Shaolin_Bukkake, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:38, archived)

It doesn't work

on Netscape 4.07 on the Mac.

Well it, but I hear that so often that I thought I'd bother you with it.

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blah, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:44, archived)

arsebollocks

for one magic moment, I had edit and delete buttons all over the shop. And now I haven't.

Oh well.. don't really need them. Although I could delete this whole pointless thread if I had them.

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chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:39, archived)

when i'm not logged in

I can see ecit etc on all the posts, yet when i do login i can't see nought, I have got rid of me cookies and logged back in but still no luck

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i've got tickets to the first showing of star wars, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:40, archived)

can't log out...... =)

(redifusion, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:00, archived)

I seem to have

edit and delete rights on everyone's messages, and I'm not even logged in.

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pabulum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:12, archived)

And now that I am logged in

I don't have edit and delete at all.

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pabulum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:15, archived)

woops

I think that's what rawedge said earlier :)

(

pabulum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:17, archived)

nor can I

I have to delete my cookies to log out.

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rob, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:12, archived)

Marvel as I majestically pimp my site!

(MyName, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:05, archived)

i made what

i think the audition for 'the exorcist' would have been like

here

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monkeon schmonkeon, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:04, archived)

That's

incredible.

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mrbrong, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:13, archived)

i am having trouble naming this beautiful beast.

the floor is open to suggestions

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:59, archived)

Oops

sorry, you'll want the image as well won't you, my bad.

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:01, archived)

Peckersus?

:O)

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Kaiser, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:05, archived)

nice

it's like a flying lance, quick duck!

*wooooosh*

there he goes, into the sunset

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:26, archived)

We have a chance of getting a TV show....

I was talking to a TV production company today who asked if we could put together a load of stuff that might be suitable for a TV show. Preferably vaguely topical (though that's not absolutely necessary), animations, gags, video, whatever. They want a load of stuff by mid next week, on the basis that we're a bunch of creative nutters with ideas, and they could then worry themselves about whether it could be turned into a viable format for a series. If anyone wants to have a crack, email me at [email protected] or just do some shit and whack it up here. Anyone in? This is very much up in the air, but there's a possibility we may be able to make it work if the ideas are good enough. Woo!

(

crab_bloke), Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:32, archived)

big woo indeed

look out TV land the b3tans are coming. Tell em to look at the Daily Reckless and look out for Fat Boab stuff up here and in your postbox soon old chap. Sterling work, pincer person.

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:42, archived)

Animatiooooooonnnnn!

Would be cool to do some b3ta style animation 4 tv free from the resrictions of the animated git. Flash output onto video looks very cool. watch this space. well not this space, a space a little higher up the board.

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big daft dave, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:49, archived)

Good stuff

Let's get some quality shit together. It's about ideas at this stage- in their words production values would have to be "shifted up a gear" for broadcast, but it's def the content that counts. See southpark, jackass etc- "underground" feel is good. Woo. infact, woo x 2.

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crab_bloke), Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:58, archived)

what we need

is dancing girls... in white bikinis and polar bear heads andthen a lead guy in full posh suit with tails and a penguin for a head - not a penguin head but a whole penguin instead of a head -they can do one of them old fashion dance routines set to hardcore thrash w3rd!!

(scabby dog, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:03, archived)

sounds like a good idea

gorilla film making.

if i have some free time i'll see if i can get somthing done.

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:44, archived)

Crab Bloke on Telly ...

Will we be seeing Cliff and Diana on the telly, then?

(Jools, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:45, archived)

And

Deity Gangbang!

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vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:50, archived)

that could fucking rule

if i had any ability i'd help but i don't, so best of luck.

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mikeisbrill, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:53, archived)

Could we call it "WOO TV"?

...in an "incomprehensible-to-most-of-the-world" pun on the U2 title?

Total class if it happens. You have inspired me to hit the Photoshop hard as soon as my big deadline for this week is over...

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chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:01, archived)

I am up for it, have dabbled in video/TV in me time

I must urge extreme caution, TV types = v-bad, look what they have done to TVgoHome etc. They have advertising to sell to make money and a certain level of nutterness and they will back off or try to water it down.

No Watering Down!! should be the slogan at all time. Or we risk being another dotcomedy fronted by Gail fucking Porter

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bazman, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:15, archived)

unless

it is a mutant Gail Porter-Bear

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bazman, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:27, archived)

It needs to be legal

This is the only real problem- we can be as stupid as we like with what we come up with as long as no-one gets sued.

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crab_bloke), Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:36, archived)

wooo

can there be celery involved, please!

(

bazman, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:37, archived)

and

my Barbra Streisland robbing banks idea I should shelve then I suppose

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bazman, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:42, archived)

Off to the zoo then

to snap some polar bear pictures.

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izb posting occasional messages since 2001, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:44, archived)

dot comedy

ive been trying to remember the name of that show - how fucking bad was that programme!! aaaahhh!1 b3ta show should never ever be like that cack - b3ta seems like it should be more on the lines of an updated version of terry gilliam madness etc

(scabby dog, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:57, archived)

Exactly

it's been done badly a few times- this is our chance to redress the balance. "guerilla creativity" is the name of the game.

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crab_bloke), Tue 5 Mar 2002, 7:59, archived)

Marvellous

I'll get me thinking cap on and see what i can come up with... Possibly a picture of me with a cap on that says "thinking" on it... Maybe that's only good enough for dotcomedy?

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vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:02, archived)

I met the producer of that show.

He said that the pilot wasn't crap, and that it was ruined by C4s commissioning editors.

(

rob, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:01, archived)

exactly my point

they are spider babys the lot of them, we should set traps

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bazman, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:11, archived)

How long a show?

I was just thinking that a short show would be better than a long one. Unnovations, for example, is pretty awful and unfunny on the TV, because it's dragged out far too long.
The perfect show (IMO) would just be a rolling gallery of b3ta images, with the theme tune to the Take Hart gallery in the background. And that's all. That way you'd still pick up on running themes in the pictures, which is half the joke.
I'm not sure that animations would work as well on the TV, since animation isn't all that difficult on TV anyway. There are notable exceptions though, such as the Davros/Stephen Hawking one (and yesterday's rickets sisters animation).

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KQ, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 10:13, archived)

damn I look fine in my new krillby

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chthonic, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:31, archived)

Fantastic

And if you fell in the sea, it would swim you back to shore. Stylish safety clothing. woo!

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crab_bloke), Tue 5 Mar 2002, 8:02, archived)

I posted this ages ago,

And it's actually a picture of Esther Rantzen, like anyone can tell.
But I like it.

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vulga is a foul mouthed cunt, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:22, archived)

This scared the hell out of me...

Clicky

(Dean, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:00, archived)

AAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

bad flashbacks of an old job where i had to use a mac.

never do that again, ever, you scared the hell out of me

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Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:24, archived)

fucking hell!

scary!

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mikeisbrill, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:27, archived)

That's

class!

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witchy is covered in BEES, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 6:53, archived)

A message from the creators of b3ta.com...

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Your Mum, Tue 5 Mar 2002, 5:36, archived)

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