Medics
As a dental student, I saw more than my fair share of dead people ranging from the specimens in the Morbid Anatomy dissection rooms - think of Gunther Hagens work, but more messy - to the delights of a fresh post-mortem. Which was much more dramatic and rather disturbing. Cadavers for dissection are like preserved waxworks; devoid of bodily fluids and divorced from reality. A fresh corpse is exactly that. A person who obviously has ony recently stopped living and breathing. My most upsetting sight at this time was a stillborn foetus dissected so as to demonstrate the disposition of the spinal nerves. It looked far too much like a little baby asleep and I can still think of it today. What any of this had to do with me spending a career drilling holes in teeth I have yet to determine, but there you go. The most recent dead body I saw was that of my father. Sleep well, Old Man.
(lennylaw, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 20:51, 1 reply)

Have you ever seen a dead body?
I served a stint as an Auxiliary Police Officer in a major American city. Part of our training was a sesh with the Medical Examiner's office, and knowing that we were civilian volunteers they always picked out the choicest corpses when they knew that the Auxiliaries were being dragged in.

Anyway, the corpse they had lain out for us to see was what they call a "floater" - fished out of the harbor in an advanced state of decomposition after roughly two weeks of leisurely summer bathing without the aide of a pulse.

Anyway, when the M.E. dramatically pulled back the sheet, two of my cohorts launched their lunch straight down the front of their uniforms, one passed out, and the rest of us wretched from the stench, which was sort of like low-tide at the rotting fish beach - the M.E. explained that the majority of the stench was from adipocere - the liquification of putrefied fat. Further, he demonstrated something called "skin slippage" by using a forceps to grasp a bit of skin near the dearly departed's left shoulder and in one motion, peeling back the poor gent's entire chest skin, leaving rivulets of runny, stinky, rotten liquid fat cascading down the man's sides and pooling beneath his bloated buttocks. I should also mention that his twig and berries had been considerably scavenged by whatever decided it liked the taste of him, so most of what was left down there was vessles, some greasy snippets of muscle, and one ancient, withered testicle, looking kind of like a shucked oyster with a bad disease.
(vecchio, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 20:33, 2 replies)

Does Body Worlds count?
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_Worlds

If you get the chance go and see it, its fascinating.

Make sure you eat a packet of beef jerky while walking around, it tends to freak people out.
( a username Tue 30 Mar 1971 til, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 20:30, 3 replies)

*shivers*
I was hospitalised last year due to Cellulitus of the face, and given that I was nineteen at the time, I had to stay on a ward with a lot of old wrinklies. (too old for the awesome Children's ward, but then at least I didn't have a censor time on my TV) I was easily the youngest there by a good forty years. The ward had eight beds, the lady to my right was wonderful, chatty, and such a kind person. The one to my left had been motionless from the moment I was admitted there, and all she ever really did was breathe raspily as she stared up at the ceiling. She didn't eat or anything, and there was a lot of hushed talk about her dying. A few days into my stay, they drew the curtains around her, giving her privacy in her final moments.

So it was really sod's law that they were drawn back when she did die. Because it was during 'rest hour' I was watching TV, the rest of the old biddies were asleep like the nurses suggested. I happened to glance over when the lights were switched back on, and said lady was flat out on her back, staring up at the ceiling with... the most horrific expression I have ever seen. It was as if she had been dragged kicking and screaming from her mortal coil. As soon as the nurses realised, the curtains were pulled tight about her bed again, and they went into the procedure of calling back the various relatives who had been around her almost constantly the past few days.

They seem to think that she died at the beginning of the rest hour, when her relatives had left the room, that she held on just long enough for them to go. The idea that I had a dead body in the bed next to me whilst I was watching Daddy Daycare was pretty unsettling. They didn't even move the body until a few hours later, granted I couldn't see her, but the idea of her being there chilled me right to the bone. They pulled all of our curtains across when they did wheel her out, thankfully, but still... it wasn't nice. That night all I could see was her wrinkled face, staring up at me.

The very best part of this being? Happy Birthday to me. Best way to spend my twentieth birthday ever.

That said, reading through some of the other answers here, I realise that I've been really lucky. None of my close friends of relatives have died, other than an aunt a few years ago, and even then we weren't close.
(Wheeler back off Amazon, she's mine!, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 20:30, 6 replies)

Thankfully...
...I've witnessed nothing worse than the odd bug infested animal corpse. I watched over the course of months blackbird turn from a corpse to a perfect skeleton.

My brother had to cut down some guy who had hung himself.

The best story I've heard was of my Grandad (on my dads side) He died long before I was born, but I'm told he was an illiterate fool with a severe temper.

Back in those days your career choices were limited and more often than not you took what you could. One day he was asked to do some 'recovery' work on a recent ship wreck. He and another diver had to collect the corpses of the cook and captain, as my Grandad no doubt fought back the urge to vomit in his suit, he somehow decided if he grabbed the corpses arm whilst not looking then it would no longer be a corpse.

It was only when it dawned on him what he was pulling seemed light that he turned, only to see he was clasping a torn off arm rather than a body that he did vomit in his diving suit.

Another time, he was searching for 2 missing divers in a dual lake, one higher up that fed a smaller, lower down one via a pipe that got very thin towards the end. Apparently, said divers had took it upon themselves to find out why the top lake was no longer feeding the lower one and found there to be a sheet of metal blocking the pipe. Instead of attaching the metal to something and then pulling it out, they dragged it away from the pipe and were instantly sucked in by the sheer force of the water and were crushed to death as the pipe narrowed.
(vampyre_gem has been dead since, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 20:25, 1 reply)

Enough is enough....
I have (as I do pretty much every week) read every single post on this QOTW so far, and have to concede that it has not really filled me with the urge to skip gaily down the street (although frankspencer did raise the customary smile)....

I'm with curvylittlegoth on this one - we should be celebrating the lives of our loved ones and not dwelling on the maudlin, the dire, the untimeliness of it all. Sure, the reaper is going to get us all one day - yes even YOU dear reader - some of us sooner than others, but surely this should serve as a reminder to make the most of the fact that we are alive NOW!

If nothing else, this QOTW should make each and every one of us pause to remember those we have loved and had taken away from us, before moving on to consider what it is that we find so beautiful, so worthwhile and so downright precious about the miracle of life itself...

I've suffered my share of bereavements over the course of my lifetime (I'm 46 now), hell, who hasn't, but I refuse to dwell on that now...as I sit here and type this, I can hear my 6 year old daughter singing to herself in the next room... Ten minutes ago, my 11 year old daughter passed through on her way to the kitchen, blew me a kiss, and said "love you, dad"....and do you know what folks? Those two events alone more than make up for all the pain and suffering that death has tried to wreak upon me. When was the last time you sat and truly WATCHED a sunset? Or better still, stayed up all night and watched a sunrise? Looked at a vista that you burned onto your memory for life? Felt the rain or sun on your face, and truly revelled in the feeling? Listened to music that made every hair on your body stand on end?

If you're reading this, then you are alive, and therefore doing better than pretty much everybody else who is the subject of the other posts this week. Make the most of your time here, people, because the way I see it (and trust me, I am NOT some religious nut - I am very much the atheist), you get one chance at this - it's NOT a dress rehearsal, and you really ARE a long time dead. Give death the finger and LIVE a little (or a lot) before it's YOUR turn to shuffle off this mortal coil.

Apologies for rant, but this really hasn't been my favourite QOTW.....

Re-lurk....
(Desolation Angel, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 19:35, 6 replies)

Comfort fabric conditioner...
...was the reagent of choice for softening hacked off limbs in my old human dissection room. Needless to say, laundry has never been the same since in my house.

Seen lots of whole deaddies during my time as an undergrad Anatomy student and postgrad anatomy tutor supplementing my frankly pitiful PhD stipend. Makes for a popular topic at parties, after-dinner speaking, that sort of thing. *cough*

My lasting impression is that, overridingly, whole ones are better than the bits. Setting up spot exams for the undergrads meant carrying torsos and arms around all day. On a fundamental level that kind of thing messes with your brain, however "scientific" you are...
(Dr Wee is rummaging through the spare kidneys on, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 19:24, Reply)

I was walking around in Camden
as one does, when I walked past some black bin bags down by the canal, that looked as though they were rather sloppy. And smelly. And creepy in a weird sort of way, so being the wimp I am I walked past them quickly. I kept thinking about these bags as they had kind of creeped me out, and wondered if I should go back to have another look. I changed my mind rather hurriedly when I turned on the news that night to see that the breaking news for the day was "parts of prostitutes bodies found in black bags in Camden." And that was how I kind of discovered the Camden Ripper's victims.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 19:07, Reply)

Road Trip
While attending the University of Connecticut I decided to hitchhike to Florida for Spring break. Late at night near New Bohemia, Virginia I get picked up by a man driving a station wagon. We chatted up a little. I told him where I was coming from and where I was heading. Eventually he had to stop for fuel. When he got out of the vehicle I turned and looked in the back. There was a gurney with what appeared to be a body covered by a sheet. After he got back in I asked "Is that what I think it is back there?" "What?" he says. "Is that a body?" "Yes." He proceeds to tell me that he is a deliveryman for the local funeral home directors' association. It's a boring job so he likes to pick up hitchhikers to keep him company. YIKES! I couldn't fall asleep until two nights later when I was finally in Florida.
(StinkyCheeseMan, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 18:53, Reply)

I have seen too many....
I have seen too many dead bodies in my lifetime..thank you very much. It started when I was 9 and it was my Grandma. That was awful and I remember it like it was yesterday...and I'm 37 now. I've also kissed my Mother in law's lifeless body goodbye after she died of cancer. She was still at home when I saw her. No one tells you that when you die...everything lets loose. Wasn't pretty...but I kissed her anyway and love and miss her to this day.

I've also seen...

-my husband's best friend (he was 34 and died of a heart embolism)

-another of my husband's best friend's father (he loved us as we were his own)

-my friend's brother (who was also my friend and was one of the best guys I've ever known)

-my grandfather (the bastard..long story..other QOTW..if it's about pedophiles)

Then there are the two services I went to that the people were cremated. My cousin..who killed himself at 35..cried like an absolute fool for that one....and one of my best friend's...she died of heart failure after a 5 year battle with cancer...cried like a fool for that one too.

Been there too many times and have seen waaay too many bodies for my liking. I'm envious of you that haven't seen them....try to keep it that way.
(bitchymama belongs to the fat man on..., Fri 29 Feb 2008, 18:40, Reply)

I couldn't believe my luck!
I was in Croydon a couple of years back and stumbled across a model - I originally thought she was sleeping but after seeing a few stab wounds I realised that we were both struck with rigor mortis.

I didn't kill her - but who would pass on an opportunity like that?

See you soon, if they like my story
Mark Dixie
( TGP on the rock 'n' roll, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 18:38, Reply)

I dissected a pig heart today in biology
and thats as close as I have got.
(thebadger Isn't lurking for a change on,, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 17:52, Reply)

Dunno about you lot . . .
. . . . but after reading this week's QOTW, I'm going to be frickin' careful about crossing the street/taking the bus/catching the train/driving home/getting cancer this weekend.
(ring-finger is also a verb, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 17:47, Reply)

My Grandads funeral
Obvious enough, I suppose, but I felt bored and decided a little mischief was in order.

So, seated next to my younger impressionable brother and landlocked by grieving relatives, I nudged him slightly to draw his attention then pointed at the enormous dangling crucifix above the altar and said, "Jaysus", which in a deep Dublin drawl is the funniest, most inappropriate thing you will ever hear at a Catholic funeral.

Poor guy was inconvulsions and drew stares from all and sundry.

I buried my head in my chest and appeared the perfect grieving grandson.
(bazmorningstar efil4nat3b, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 16:52, 3 replies)

Just the other night
Well, this wasn't a dead body - but for a few long seconds, I thought it was. So indulge me while I tell my story.

Wednesday night (two nights ago) was cold here in Mississippi, so for the third time since we bought our house, I turned on the fire - it has one of the fake "gas logs" that look like a big, wood burning fire. The fireplace has a large brick hearth in front of it, wide enough for people to sit on, maybe two feet high.

My wive was standing in front of it, warming herself, when she started to move away, and somehow slipped - probably where the edge of the floor rug is on the wooden floor. She fell over backwards, and her head hit the edge of the brickwork. It was all in slow motion - the sound was terrible, and as she hit the floor there was blood everywhere.

I thought she had split her head open - she wasn't moving, not making a sound, and I was so afraid she had "bought the farm" as they say. Fortunately, she started to groan, and try to speak.

To cut a long story short, she had a three inch cut in the back of her head - twelve staples is holding that together now - and broke her collarbone.

But that's the closest thing to a dead body I want to see.
(Maclir, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 16:46, Reply)

Feeling down...
A joke that I thought might lighten the sombre mood...

I cant think of anything worse after a night of drinking than waking up next to someone and not being able to remember their name, or how you met, or why they are dead.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 16:46, 1 reply)

The nearest I've got to seeing a dead body
was when my train was delayed by over two hours because someone had thrown themselves off a bridge near Grantham, thereby derailing a train and causing severe disruption to all the east coast main-line services.

I'd like to think this was done deliberately because the bridge-jumper had had such a shit time in life that s/he wanted to cause as much trouble as possible when leaving this world.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 16:34, 1 reply)

A couple years back..
A friend of mine and I went to a small party for someone. We live in a very forested area, and on the way we crossed a small bridge.

A cop car comes to a stop in front of us with his lights flashing, and we see blood splattered all over the road and the guard rail. There was a large lump of something in the middle of the road, also covered in blood.

"A deer. That's weird, on a bridge."

And in unison we came to the fantastic realization that "... Deer don't wear pants.."
(afkun, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 16:24, Reply)

i'm 34 and i've never seen a dead body
even grandparents who have been in he chaple of rest before a funeral i've not been to see them, but have been emotional and physical support for other who have wanted to go.

i always tell people that i prefer to have a last memory of them when they were alive rather then laid on a casket.
( Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 16:13, 2 replies)

Not death, as such, but...
I keep seeing an incredibly short woman (and when I say short, I mean literally 2ft tall) who walks up the street outside my work every day. She always has a mobile phone glued to her ear.

She seems to be about 18, but height-wise looks more like 4. She's obviously got some sort of growth defect.

I wonder how long she'll live? Maybe it's the phone that's responsible for her stunted growth? Perhaps it's been glued there for the last 14 years?
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 16:12, Reply)

bodyworlds
i got dragged to that when it was over in spitalfields market by my friend sam. i am notoriously squeamish, but the bodies didn't really look "real" enough to me. if it were ever revealed to be a hoax i wouldn't be surprised, the texture is so like plastic. nonetheless, i felt distinctly odd by the end of the exhibition.

however. as we got to the end of the display, there was a big horse and i didn't like that one little bit. it was too much flesh and it still had a big ginger tail.

and i kept thinking about this creepy german skinning it and - ugh. so right above the horse was a flight of steps that led up, not to more exhibits, but to a cafe. sam and i looked at each other, and simultaneously i said:

"jesus christ, who could eat after seeing this?"

and sam said:

"fuck me, i'm STARVING!"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:53, 4 replies)

Since so many people are saying "I went to Body Worlds"...
It's on now in Manchester:
www.msim.org.uk/whats-on/body-worlds-4

Now THAT would be a b3ta bash, what say?
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:50, 3 replies)

I should have posted this before the body falling one
When I was five, it was the height of summer, and because it was still light out at 8pm, I refused to believe it was bedtime.

My mum was telling me to go to bed, but I was a daddy's girl. So out I run into the garden where my dad was watering the grass.

As I ran up the garden, my dad was laid on the grass, hosepipe was still on. So I told him. He didn't respond, except to stick his tongue out, so I start kicking him, telling him to stop messing around and that mammy's telling me to go to bed.

Because he's still messing around, I ran back into the house to grass him up to my mum. My mum went out the back, told me to get back in the house (to which I promptly answered the door to my mate and started playing out the front).

Minutes later, an ambulance is outside, running into the house, and I'm being taken next door but one to spend the night. I was telling them how my daddy was in hospingtal and how he now knows what I felt like (I had a lot of operations).

The next day I was informed that my dad had a pulmonary embolism (caused by lung cancer), fell over, and died before he had hit the ground.

I haven't been quite right since.
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:49, Reply)

Bodies..
This might turn out to be a long one.. So apologies in advance..

A bit of back story is necessary..

My mum had a sister, a few years younger. At some point, she had contracted lung cancer, and after a somewhat extended battle, passed away. I was a wee nipper of maybe 5 years old, so I wasn't really aware of what's going on. My cousin however, my mom's sister's kid, three years older than me, was very aware of that. He was going through a rough period.

A few years after my aunt passed away, my uncle temporarily (fuck temporarily, about 5-6 sodden years) moved to Ze Fatherland (Germany) as an illegal worker, in order to have the money to support his kid, and hopefully provide a better life.

My cousin, during that time lived with my Grandmother, my parents accepted him as their own, and I accepted him as my brother. My cousin and my grandmother had a number of huge fights, but they did love each other. She was with him every step of the way during his most difficult years. She was there to give him proper advice, feed him and take care of him. She was there when we found out that he was shooting up regularly, and she was the one that provided the most support for him to clean up his act. With the support of the family, but mostly my grandmother, he cleaned up sharpish, found a job and eventually became a better person all around.

When my uncle returned, my cousin went back with him, etc etc, now they've got their own wood-processing company, things aren't that bad. Business is slow, but they manage.

March 10th last year, my grandmother passed away. Her heart had been very weak for a few years, and to some extent, we had all expected it. It was a Saturday morning, we went to her place after a close friend of hers that had keys to her apartment had called us. She had a heart attack at some point during the night. My father and I sorted out the funeral details while my mother prepared her. The funeral was to be on Sunday.

During all of this, I managed to remain calm. I was reasonably close to my grandmother, but I kept my emotions under control.

My cousin arrived that night. Because he and his father live somewhat far, it took them a few hours. We had a few beers in grandma's honour, and prepared for the funeral.

The next day, during the funeral, a slight drizzle started.. As my grandmother's casket was being lowered into the ground, my cousin started crying. It was obvious that the loss was much greater for him than for any one of us. Having lost his mother at a very young age, my grandmother was his mother, a person that he really, truly loved, possibly more than any of us. It is then, that I started crying, because I knew that my grandmothers life had influenced us all, especially my cousin in a way that we'll always appreciate.

The one year anniversary of her death is coming up.. We all miss you gran..
(zeroSignal, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:48, Reply)

I have never seen a dead body.
Yes at 27 years old, I am yet to even glimpse on a real life corpse. Which makes answering this question difficult. But I am on a mission to answer every single QOTW.

Death has always been something that I've never really had to deal with. I have a memory of my uncle dieing when I was a kid. I went to the funeral and ended up a complete emotional wreck. I wasnt even that close to him. He was just the guy down the club that could drink my dad under the table and give us sweets. I remember seeing him in hospital barely able to talk as lung cancer took a hold.
The whole funeral experience watching the candles burn down, the prayers and seeing adults cry just set me off and apparantly I cried all day. I was more upset than his wife.

A little older my grandmother died. She was on the same side of the family, so as such was a bit distant. I remember going up there on Sundays and seeing her just sat in her chair and wasnt able to do much. She used to have a TV pinned to her face because she was going blind. Soon TV was just replaced with a radio. She ended up in a nursing home and died there.

I was asked if I wanted to go see the body at the wake. I declined. I knew that if I did then thats how I would remember her. A dead body layed in a coffin would be quite a shocking sight. I feared it would remove all memories of talking to her on those Sunday afternoons.

Luckily I have never had someone really close to me ever die. I sometimes imagine.. roll play in my head if you like what would happen if I lost a brother or a parent and how I would feel. I think I'd be completely wrecked to be honest. The sad thing is, the days will inevitably come.


To be honest, I dont think i'd particularly like to see any dead body at a wake. I do believe that when someone dies, the actual person leaves the body. The body is no more than a representation of what the person once was. I don't see the point in saying goodbye to a corpse. I'd probably rather say goodbye with an old photo. At least the life was in it then.

Appologies for lack of humour. Death isn't funny. Next week we need a side splitting QOTW. One so funny we all hurt with laughter!
(Miggyman, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:46, Reply)

my great grandmother
died when I was about 12. I went to see the body in the casket and I recall my mum telling me that my great-gran had woke up from her bed where she was lying having been ill for some time and asked for a glass of sherry.
She drank her sherry, said thank you and goodbye and died.

That's how I want to go....not only drinking but dropping dead just when it's my round...result!
( sneep used to date Freddie Starr's hamster, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:37, 2 replies)

I didn't realise she was dead until they put me on trial.
Best shag of my life.
(SSSSS, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:34, Reply)

hmm
Go to the Bodyworks Exhibition. Hundreds of the fuckers. If you look carefully you can still see their tats. They've minges and knobs and all sorts of stuff. Theres even a special area where there is a dead foetus for each phase of pregnancy. Of particular highlight is the pregnant woman complete with an almost full term foetus inside her. And by complete, I mean "cut in half".

Its actually really good and I recommend it. You can touch them if you like.

My only critiscm is the lack of animatronics. That would be hilarious.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:32, 2 replies)

Bad first day
I do IT support for a local Co-op. I remember my first day, one of the boys took me out to a few different kinds of store so I could get a feel for what gear was in what kind of shop. I got taken to a funeral parlour, met the manager, had a cup of tea, got taken through to the back of the shop to the office... Through the embalming room, where they were preparing a fucking babies corpse. Not a happy sight at all, especially for your first day in a job that you thought would involve sitting on your arse all day.
( crazygibbon all your monster munch are belong to us, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:19, 1 reply)

I felt nothing. Nothing.

(SSSSS, Fri 29 Feb 2008, 15:18, Reply)