Usual Suspects
Im a massive film geek, so picking just one film is gonna be nigh on impossible.
Plaudits have to go to The Usual Suspects though. It's a fantastic film, and demands repeated viewings.
There are some great lines in it:
"Oswald was a fag"
"I'm telling you this guy is protected from up on high by the Prince of Darkness. "


Sheer genius.
(Kezmo, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 12:56, 1 reply)

Sorry, but one more
as we're on Sean Connery.

"The Offense"

This film shows Sean Connery at his very best, and also suggests a dark side to everyone's personality that we like to hide.

If you've not already watched it, I'd suggest that you do, though I warn you that it is very dark.
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 12:51, Reply)

The Hill
probably the best film Sean Connery has been in, and an absolutely brutal and dark war film that is not for the faint hearted. Annoyingly it was discontinued 4 years ago so almost impossible to get on dvd, but worth a watch if you ever see it on.

It is based in a disciplinary camp in north africa during WW2 where the most evil gaurd you will ever see makes the convicts march up and down a hill in full pack, and deals out some seriously sadistic beatings to the prisoners. think of all those war films where the new recruits get dehumanised and abused during training including Full Metal Jacket etc etc. This film takes all of those "brutal army segreant major shouts and bullies the newbies" type films, sets fire to them, pisses them out, waits for them to dry out and then sets fire to them again, then kicks the fire out with a pair of size 12 hobnails.

A classic, and a very hard to find classic at that.
(Halfy By light alone, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 12:48, 2 replies)

Wall-E
I have to be honest, this film goes straight in to the top five best films ever made. It's beautifully shot (well, animated), the direction is great, there are some fantastic little nods to other films and in-jokes (like the Macintosh boot-up sound used when Wall-E reboots - Steve Jobs owns Pixar and started Apple, etc). The first half an hour or so is genuinely breathtaking (far better at the apocalyptic aftermath than things like I Am Legend, etc) and there is real emotional depth in the performances. Bearing in mind the dialog is pretty much limited to "Wall-E!" and "Eeeeve!" and it's amazing at how well you can follow the rollercoaster of emotions in the film.

You'll laugh, cry, be on the edge of your seat and come away feeling drained, but richer for having seen it. And immediately start praying for the Bluray release!
(Chad, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 12:44, Reply)

Its practically impossible...
... to narrow it down to just one movie.

Some I love, in no particular order:

The Shipping News - as a die hard Annie Proulx fan, I enjoyed this immensely, and would love to see a TV spin off show a-la Northern Exposure.

Battleship Potempkin - What can say about this that hasn't been said before?

Northfork - Theres a dog ON STILTS!! If that ain't for the win, then I don't know what is? And the diner scene is just an absolute joy.

Brick - Just such a very fine movie. High School kids slap bang in the middle of a Chandler-esque murder mystery.

October Skies - An early showing from the excellent Jake Gylenhal (sp?) and a nice family movie.

Ground Control (released as Jet in the UK) - this one is a bit of a guilty pleasure :-)

Pushing Tin - Another ATC movie. Mmmm.

High Fidelity - Just great from start to finish.

Also rans, despite the deliberate schmaltsy-ness of it, I love Armageddon.

Con Air is great fun. So are the first two Die Hard movies.

Fargo and O Brother Where Art Thou are both excellent, excellent movies.

84 Charlie MoPic and Apocolypse Now both showing different and as far as I know, equally valid versions of The 'Nam.

The Good The Bad and The Ugly.

And you can never forget Space Cowboys. Finally got Clint in a Space Suit! :-)

There are just way too many to do justice to all the good 'uns, but there a few there that I think are pretty ace.

*edit* And you know...the usual run of John Hughs style flicks and most of Kevin Smiths oeuvre. :-)
(TC, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 12:41, 1 reply)

.
men in black women
(tubeman trousers, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 12:40, 2 replies)

In a similar vein to PJM's post
'Getaway In Stockholm'.

Highly illegal and irresponsible, but oh so much fun.

For those not in the know, the film starts with a Porsche 911 Turbo driving along the motorway in Sweden. A police Volvo appears behind and signals for the driver to stop, which he does, and the policeman gets out of his car and starts walking towards the Porsche.

And then the Porsche driver floors it. He takes the next exit off the motorway and leads the police on a high-speed chase through the deserted streets of central Stockholm, out onto twisty country roads, and eventually pulls into the driveway of a house and switches his lights off.

And that's the film. 15 minutes of skilled (and incredibly lucky) driving, with the only soundtrack coming from a turbocharged Boxer engine and the occasional wail of a police siren left far behind.

It's brilliant.

The swedes seem to go in for that kind of thing quite a lot. There's a guy called 'Ghost Rider' who did the same thing, but on a bike.




One more: 'Dancer in the Dark', by Bjork. Some say it's pretenscious - I say it's fucking brilliant.
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 12:30, 1 reply)

Porn titles
I love the titles of the crap porn versions of famous films.
I wonder if the people who think these up are B3tans.

Shaving Ryan's Privates
The Sperminator
Romancing the Bone
The Loin King
Cum and Cummer
The Bone Molester
Creamer Vs Creamer
Star Whores
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 11:49, 10 replies)

Not The Best Film Ever
But I watched it this weekend, and it's one of the best films I've seen in a long time.

"In Bruges"

It features Colin Farrell as a hitman who made a mistake, and has been sent to Bruges to lay low for a while by his boss, referred to only as Harry (we don't see him until half way through the film).

His companion on this trip is Brendan Gleason, a much more experienced man in the field. While Gleason is greatly enjoying the historical aesthetics of Bruges, Farrell is bored, and keeps complaining.

The two of them are an odd couple, coming out with some fantastic banter.

What follows is an hour and a half of drugs, dwarves, guns and people saying the word 'cunt' a lot!

It's absolutely fantastic, and the darkest comedy I've seen in a very long time.

Get it!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 11:48, 1 reply)

Teeth
As a horror movie, it is the worst trite you could ever see.

But if you watch it in a comedy frame of mind... it is pure gold.

Could not stop laughing in most parts, it was hilarious! Especially the part where the gynaecologist is throwing her about the table trying to get his hand back from where it was stuck.
(Stephen5555 is posting on, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 11:42, 1 reply)

C'était un rendez-vous
Or "It Was an Appointment", was a little known art house film before 2002 when it was released on DVD. The premise is that a car is driven across Paris to enable the driver to meet with some French strumpet on the steps of Montmartre.

It's also nine minutes long... And filmed in a single take.

So why include it here?

Well, the story is thus. French director Claude Lelouch bought himself a new type of camera which filters out vibration so the result is rock steady. The camera had a capacity of nine minutes of film, perfect for filming brief action scenes, but the clincher was that Lelouch had also bought himself a Ferrari too and reckoned that the car could be driven from Porte Dauphine to Montmarte before the reel of film was used up.

The end result is a hair-raising blat across sleepy early morning Paris, with no soundtrack aside from twelve highly tuned tenor Italian cylinders revving and barking along to the action, with throttle blipping downchanges, missed gears and the exhaust note bouncing off the nearby walls. It's actually even better than say; driving your Alfa Romeo V6 through the Dartford tunnel in second gear with the windows wound down (hypothetically speaking of course).

Shortly after the release of the film, Lelouch was arrested for reckless driving. He wasn't at any point seem driving the car and indeed rumours persist that an anonymous Formula One driver was actually behind the wheel. Whatever the truth, the case was dropped and C'était un rendez-vous earned itself considerable notoriety.

- Spoiler Alert

Alas, it wasn't a Ferrari 275 GTB what was driven across Paris, but an altogether more clumsy Mercedes SEL. The soundtrack from a real Ferrari was cleverly dubbed over the top, along with screechy tyre effects, the latter sounding somewhat less than realistic given the change in road surface from tarmac to cobbles in places.

The location of the camera, just below bumper level enhances the impression of speed - indeed several independent groups testify that the car did not exceed 85mph at any point in the film.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Mon 21 Jul 2008, 11:39, 5 replies)

Hospitalized 2: Redux - The sequel
Okay Hugh Grant and Patrick Swayze battled with some Russians in my first post which can be found here (sorry it's not a link, I am not IT expert):

www.b3ta.com/questions/films/post204012

And so here is the sequel...it is obviously a bigger budget sequel with less coherent plot and would clearly be the blockbuster disappointment of the summer if it was ever released. Enjoy anyway.

Hospitalized II: Redux

The film opens on Mr Ballamatron, Patrick Swayze himself in sunglasses enjoying a pina colada on the beaches of Cuba. There is no reason for this other than to show he is enjoying himself. He makes some lame remark to himself about loving the sea – 'Ah, I love it here, so peaceful.' He lifts up his paper which reads that a war has started. 'The opposite to war' he says. He sips his pina colada a little more before a shadow comes across him. Swayze looks up. Hugh Grant is standing over him. He calls him Ballamaman affectionately. He asks him what numbers he wants from the takeaway later and writes down what Swayze says. They talk a little about the thriving war between Russia and the United States and also about the previous film in case anybody watched this film without having previously watched the arse-kicking awesomeness that was Hospitalized.

Hugh Grant as Timothy Bottomley decides to grab a chair next to Swayze. He sits down and watches as Swayze's pina colada is shot out of his hand. They both look behind them to see an Odd Job-alike in full waiter outfit yelling in Russian, with a pistol in his hand. 'I work for Yuri' says the man. 'But you were my trusted aide!' Shouts Swayze, 'I told you everything!' Swayze takes of his sunglasses and propels them at Odd Job-alike knocking him unconscious. 'Oakleys, dressed to kill' says Swayze in a clear piece of product placement. They get up and walk towards the man. 'What was he saying about Yuri?' says Hugh, remembering Yuri was featured in the last film as some Russian Commander man. Swayze reiterates that the man worked for him but questions how he got his gun and got onto establishment to kill him. 'The Russians are coming' deduces Swayze. 'Quick, we must get back to the building.' Swayze pushes a tree down (fake obviously) revealing a trap door. They run down it and through a series of tunnels to the building – another Swayze owned hospital. Grant looks around him and stops. 'What the-'

Grant has good reason to be shocked. In this tunnel, which he obviously didn't know existed, are various weapons. 'Cold war weapons' says Swayze. Grant inspects them closely. Made in Russia. 'And now they want them back' says Swayze. He explains a random backstory, about how after the first film he moved all the weapons from that hospital to this Cuban hospice, knowing they would be safe here. Why keep them? Says Grant, money says Swayze. Swayze logs in to some computers in this tunnel and sees screens of his hospice. At that moment, he radios Jacinta, whose voice makes her sound like a complete babe, saying he needs her here quickly and that where she is is unsafe. 'And make it fast' adds Hugh for no other reason than to appear bumbling. He quivers his lip a little more.

Cut to Jacinta in her retreat, nearish to the beach. She is clearly some kind of scientist. But more importantly, she is eye candy and obvious future love interest to our Tim, Hugh Grant. She looks out the window and radios Swayze back. What is it says Swayze. The Russians, she says, they are approaching the beaches. 'Shit' says Swayze, 'get out of there'. The Russians make up two helicopters and a loads of boats a little further away. This is crucial to the next bit of the story. Jacinta packs a rucksack and runs out to her quad bike. She revs it up as goes like the fucking wind along the sand. These shots will probably make her look a lot like Lara Croft and make any action fanboy fall in love. By now she has her headset on and is radioing Swayze as she drives along the beach. 'I got visitors' she says as two helicopters begin firing at her. She does some crazy jumps and swerves to avoid the bullets. Just keep going says Swayze. 'When do I not?' says Jacinta. Yes, that's right, she is also a slut. Jacinta stops her quadbike. She takes out some kind of bazooka and aims it at the helicopters. She hits one, it swerves wildly into the other. Together they create a huge fireball explosion and fall into the sea. 'Hot stuff' says Jacinta. 'With Cold War weapons' smiles Swayze. She tells him that more Russians are approaching by boat and easily drives the rest of the way to the secret lair. Swayze lets her in.

Swayze tells her to wait for a bit and that he and Hugh will arm themselves and take on some Russian badasses. Together they run off with loads of weapons, and hide amongst the trees. The Russian boats pull up. A single Russian officer, namely, Yuri, approaches the beach with a white flag in his hand and a megaphone. 'All I want is the weapons.' Says Yuri. He waits for a few seconds before saying that Swayze can come out now and end this futile fighting. Grant and Swayze mouth 'fuck that shit' to each other and Yuri says fine. He looks at the hospice. His second in command chucks him something with a red button on it. Yuri presses it.

KABOOM!

Holy shit! This film has way more money to waste than the first one! The hospice gets blow to smithereens. Jacinta runs out of the tunnel into Hugh's arms. Bless. Meanwhile, Swayze calmly walks out to face Yuri. Yuri says that Swayze knows what they are after. The document says Yuri. Woah, plot twist or what!? Swayze says he thought they wanted the weapons. No says Yuri, the document_ I don't have it, says Swayze. Then I have no choice but to- BANG. Grant plants a bullet in Yuri's sidekick's head. 'Kill you?' Says Grant? They run away under heavy fire from the Russian army. Yuri is incensed with rage.

Through the trees, the three of them run until they get to a safe distance – as they run, Swayze criticises Grant's aiming. 'I haven't shot in a while!' says Grant. Jacinta then says that she wouldn't mind Grant shooting at her and Grant as usual doesn't understand. 'But that would kill you' he says. They stop for a bit to rest and Swayze explains – 'They want the codes to the nukes. I have three of their cold war nukes, they have the other 3. But I have all the codes.' Holy shit. The scene cuts back to Yuri on the beach. 'Now, they must die' he says solemnly and quietly to himself. He makes some random arm movements and his men set to work.

Our three heroes are lead by Swayze to another secret hideout in this forest area. The man seems to have crafted his own real life Tracey Island. They walk the steps into another of these underground basement type things and Grant asks about the document_ The problem is apparently that Swayze doesn't actual have the codes on him. He used to store them under the hospice. Since it has been blown to smithereens, it may take some finding. Jacinta explains that they can get to the Hospice through these underground tunnels. And luckily, she designed them! Who woulda thunk it? Damn what a lucky bunch they are. So Jacinta leads them along some passage ways telling them how to get through to beneath the Hospice as there are certain booby traps. Yes, this film just does not stop the action flowing.

They make it to beneath the Hospice. Meanwhile the Russians are directly above them having been tipped off by Odd Job-alike that the codes are somewhere in the wreckage. They lift up the top of a hatch which is in the front garden area of the now wrecked Hospice. Jacinta is sent up first to distract the Russian soldiers. She calmly walks out and past everyone as if on a casual walk through. All the Russian soldiers stop and look at her. Damn is she sexy. Meanwhile, Swayze and Grant escape the hatch and manage to find the safe that the codes are in, battered but still secure. Swayze and Grant run it away from the hospice as Jacinta still distracts the Russians. Swayze sticks some dynamite to it and they run for cover. The door is blown clean off and the Russians all turn around (silly Patrick). Jacinta beats up a fair few Russians as Patrick and Hugh grab the document and run towards her, dodging enemy fire. Yuri is incensed. 'After them!' he says. He then radios something to someone. We don't hear it. But damn! Jacinta gets held down and taken. Hugh wants to go after her. Swayze says, 'no, we can get her later.' Awesome.

Hugh and Swayze get into a car and drive like the fucking wind. Meanwhile, the Russians come after them in not one but two super tanks. These things don't exist in real life. It is essentially a tank that can go like the fucking wind, meaning they are the same speed as our heroes. Swayze tells Hugh to check the boot where there is apparently a mine. Hugh grabs it and is told to lob it out the back. He does this and one of the super tanks hits it and for some reason it blows up. Swayze explains 'Super mine – Jacinta made it last year'. Fair enough then.

The other tank though races for them blowing up everything in their path, including the now defunct super tank in front of them. It blows up trees, houses and for no apparent reason, a doctor's surgery. 'Evil!' shouts Hugh. 'Pure evil!' Swayze agrees. 'I bet they'd attack a man with pancreatic cancer if it meant getting these codes' he says. All at once Swayze has an idea. He hands the codes to Hugh Grant, telling him to memorise the numbers. He does this by simply saving the number on his phone. Swayze spins the car. 'Without the codes, we can now go and save Jacinta' Grant lobs another super mine at the tank. It too blows up. 'Yes' they say. But uh-fucking-oh. Yuri appears in a helicopter and air strikes them. The plausibility of this film is now hedging around zero. But they survive with minor injuries to Swayze. 'I'll be fine' he says. 'Get Jacinta, make sure you protect our nukes and destroy the codes.' Grant runs for the Hospice once more as the car is wrecked. He dodges bullets on his way back and takes down those firing at him, Commando-style. He looks at his current gun, an AK-47. 'AK, a-ok!' he says. Smooth as.

Grant makes it to the hidden nukes and run inside but…Yuri is already there waiting for him with Jacinta tied up. He takes the codes. 'But how? You were just in a plane' 'Ah yes, my twin brother Ulrik' NO FUCKING WAY! Plot twist or what. There are two evil people! 'I don't want to kill you, I want for you to suffer with what you have done. And I don't need your nukes. Three is enough.' says Yuri. He hears a helicopter sound. 'That'll be Ulrik, goodbye silly Westerners' He leaves them handcuffed in the lair. 'I thought you destroyed the codes' says Jacinta 'I…did' says Hugh, 'I gave him some takeaway orders'. They laugh and share a kiss. Then Swayze stumbles into the room. He unties Jacinta and Grant, hears about the codes being takeaway numbers and picks up a bazooka and walks on outside. He spots Yuri. 'Hey, Yuri!' he shouts, 'Say goodbye to your brother!' Swayze turns the bazooka on the helicopter and blows it up. 'Noooooooo' shouts Yuri, 'You'll pay for this! I have the codes!' Swayze drops the bazooka. Yuri gets on a boat and he and his surviving men sail away. Grant and Jacinta walk out holding hands. 'Right' says Swayze, 'who wants some takeaway?' They laugh. All is good with the world. For now...

The End.
(Foz, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 11:17, Reply)

It's far too hard to think of a best film
So instead, I'm just going to name a film that a lot of people might not have seen, which is fantastic:

Lawrence of Arabia.

Directed by David Lean, with music by Maurice Jarre (I think). Absolutely stunning. The most incredibly cinematography ever, especially the bit where Omar Sharif appears froma heat-haze in the distance. Peter O'Toole is truly inspiring, and even though it's really long (the video version I have has retained the "intermission" from the cinematic release), it doesn't seem it at all.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 11:05, 1 reply)

If you like...
...Sloppy Giuseppe's description of Vanishing Point, check out The Driver (1978).

Yeah, it's that movie where the guy smashes up that orange Merc in a car-park.

Ryan O'Neal plays a bank-job getaway driver who is coaxed out of retirement by a crazy cop (Bruce Dern). Our man says less than 200 words in the whole thing (Ryan O'Neal's part was written for Steve McQueen) but delivers the greatest car chases ever committed to film. Seriously. Even better than Vanishing Point, The Gumball Rally (1976), The Seven-Ups, French Connection, Gone in 60 Seconds (1971), Bullitt and Dirty Mary Crazy Larry.

Imagine a film-noir cowboy-movie set in grimy 1970's New York with cars instead of horses. It's just awesome.

And it has a young Isabelle Adjani smouldering, speaking with a seductive French accent and smoking Gitanes throughout.

The best film ever is still the original Italian Job though.

That is all.
(Bridger.S.Toilet, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 11:01, 2 replies)

Zatoichi
www.imdb.com/title/tt0363226/

This film is just awesome, the guy is a blind samurai who travels the country kicking arse in true samurai style.

Better sword action than Kill Bill by far, with many comedy moments as well. The ending is one of the strangest I've ever seen and will certainly have you puzzled!

Plus the guy that stars in the film is Takeshi of Takeshi's Castle fame, how many more reasons do you need?!
(Jimmy Large Is huffing Jenkem on, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 10:34, 4 replies)

The Castle
is an Australian low-budget comedy from 1997. It's hilarious, probably the funniest film I've ever seen.
( krang, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 10:27, 5 replies)

Irish Cinema
I recently heard that the Irish were working on a re-make of the film Home Alone. The film is set in Dublin and also features a little boy called Kevin who gets left behind when his large Catholic family go on holiday. At first, the film faithfully follows the original, but then, there's an unusual twist. After spending time by himself, Kevin realises he's gay. However, being brought up in a conservative area of Dublin, he's afraid to let anyone know his secret for fear of being ostracised. The film explores how Kevin comes to terms with this. And the title of the film? Hone Alone.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 10:07, 2 replies)

The single greatest filmgoing experience
When I was but a wee ginger child, my parents, bless them, allowed me to read and watch anything I wished. This allowed me, they claimed, to easily discern between reality and fantasy. My favourite films were the B-movie horror classics where the hero's face, without fail, would come off at some point during the plot, generally with aid of bloodthirsty invertebrates. Yeah, they taught me the difference between the real world (gun aficionados wishing to kill me) and the film world (disfigured axe aficionados wishing to kill milk-titted teenagers in the woods.) These lessons kept me well adjusted, until C.H.U.D.

The premise of C.H.U.D. is, according to IMDB:

“A rash of bizarre murders in New York City seems to point to a group of grotesquely deformed vagrants living in the sewers. A courageous policeman, a photo journalist and his girlfriend, and a nutty bum, who seems to know a lot about the creatures, band together to try and determine what the creatures are and how to stop them.”

Eeeeeeeeeeeeek! These Cannibalistic Humanoid Underground Dwellers had faces like a pile of used condoms stuck together with Marmite, but they came up through toilets and ate people’s arses! This was the point where the real world and the horror film world morphed into a single space of liminal reality and I, as an impressionable babe, became convinced that if I sat on a toilet to do my wee, my bottom would be eaten by a human, long ago disfigured by toxic waste. Doomed was I to a decade of hovershits.

I never really got over this, and every time I sit down for a poo, I hesitate and wonder if there are any C.H.U.D.s in the sewers beneath me, geared up to snack on my bum. I can’t even use the toilet on planes, as I am so convinced I will die on the toilet, be it by maw of C.H.U.D. or other reprehensible mean. I was having a sleepytime toilet evacuation when the Buncefield oil depot blew the fuck up just a handful of miles from my house.

I was briefly terrified that the blast (nuclear, in my panic) would render me an ashen form on the bog, much like residents of Pompeii died in stasis.

The next thought hissed through my mind: C.H.U.D.s.

Best film ever? I doubt it, but it was certainly the single film – nay, piece of art of entertainment – which had the biggest impact on my life.
(TheSnark oh, c'mon, like you didn't see me coming, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 9:49, Reply)

Pebbles on a Plane
Coming back from my delightful dreadful holiday last Friday I was stopped going through airport security.

"You appear to have something solid in your bag, madam. Like a stone."

"Oh yeah, would it be a pebble?" I asked, thinking of the barely-4cm-in-diameter pretty little quartzy thing I'd picked up on the beach and slung in my case without thinking.

"We'll have to check, madam."

And so they opened my overly-crammed case to fish out the tiny pebble. They set it amid my camera cables and underwear strewn across the table and scrutinised it intensely.

"We can't let you take that on the plane, madam. You could put it in a sock and hit someone with it."

Bearing in my mind that the Valium had left my system, there was eight days of pent-up rage coursing through my veins, and I wanted to be anywhere other than the godforsaken hellhole that is Belfast airport, I think I was rather restrained not to bitterly enunciate the words:
"Fine. But I'm about to go to the duty free and buy a massive bottle of scotch which I will then drink, smash, and do more than lightly graze someone's forehead AND ANYWAY I'M WEARING SANDALS AND I DON'T HAVE ANY SOCKS."

So, ladies and gentlemen, forget Snakes on a Plane. There's a more deadly horror in town, and it's Pebbles on a Plane, and the terrifying sequel, Tweezers on a Plane. And don't miss the up-and-coming Half a Bottle of Banana Smoothie on a Plane.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 9:32, 18 replies)

Bad Taste
Bad Taste - this has to be one of my favorite films of all time . I first saw it as a 13 year old on a school trip the effects were cheap and tacky but fuck me it was funny.
Scroll forward about 15 years and im living in the uk. Wander one sunny afternoon into HMV and wat do i find ??
Bad taste for $3!!!

Viewed it that night with my flatmates
"Its Peter jacksons first film guys" LOTR was on at the time.

After the cliff diving scene the girls leave . My mate Fraz and i watched it all. And again the next night.

It became our flat bonding thing all new flatties were made to watch it .Their reactions gave us clues to their personalities and how they would fit in.

This was a golden time in my life lots of fun with mates and so on. Bad taste allways brings back happy memories for me.

OH yeah and the exploding sheep stilkl makes me laugh. So many good lines as well.

"Luck me i got a chunky bit"
"Go for the head shot Barry - its the only surefire stopper"
"I just hope im not the poor bugger thats got to clean that mess up"
"Isnt it amazing how you can fit a whole town of human beings into a few cardboard boxes if you slice off the fatty bits"
" Gee they come to bits easily"
(welgar, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 8:48, 8 replies)

bloody hell...
I turn my back for a few days to go and slap some Arabs around and you resort to this nonsense.

I love the cinema, I have since I was a small child. My earliest cinema memories are 'the head' in Jaws; being terrified at the rumbling sub woofer effects in Earthquake, every new Bond movie. Farrah Fawcet and Lee Majors, Escape to Witch Mountain, Superman, the BRILLIANT Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, I could go on.

Every Saturday from around 7 years old I would go with my little friends on the bus to a run down old fleapit in Alexandra Parade in Glasgow (no adult supervision was required – kids had freedom in the 70’s when we still had summers and before the Daily Mail bred legions of marauding vampire Nazi pedalos). For 50p you would get two movies AND cartoons and (I shit you not) they let a little downs syndrome kid dance on the stage at the intermission for braying matinee brats to throw sweets at. I still cringe.

Cinema has been a constant pleasure all my life and at each stage has offered something different. When I was 8 years old taking my little sister to see Star Wars on a hot summers day while on holiday on the Isle on Man was the height of cool and decadence – the sand pit was still there later. Getting in to see an AA’ movie while underage was a buzz. Taking Jackie Marshall to see Pretty In Pink seemed far more suave than a fumble up a close. On our first date Mrs Spimf and I both wanted to see Who Framed Rodger Rabbit? but were afraid to seem uncool – I even did the shady yawn routine.

Sudden loss of cinema freedom after the birth of my son was really tough. I have a huge DVD collection. I gambled on Bluray before it was a clear winner. I spend a fortune in Blockbuster. I have all the movie channels and yer HD and yer big Philips ambilight LCD knob extension with 7.1 surround. In short I watch a LOT of movies.

But I am fucked if I am going to define my entire life’s movie going experience to one single movie. I am a complex and emotional creature with a myriad of emotions, opinions and desires. I could no more point out which hair on my child’s head is my favourite than rest upon one movie. It’s a crass infantile question.
Goodfellas though innit.
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 8:31, 2 replies)

Schindler's List
I heard it was a real "box of tissues" movie but I only had a wank once.

runs away...
(British Steel was participating in awesomeness on, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 5:54, 4 replies)

Haggard
This is by Bam Margera and a few of the other cky guys. mostly shite but worth watching for Falcone.

"smear the shitlogs everywhere! I'm gonna go and take care of business upstairs"

"Did you know that ninety percent of the worlds freon is in old fridgerators?

"He wears womens underwears"

These quotes are only funny if you've seen the movie, so go and watch it.

Some excellent movie picks from this qotw, at least from the people who made an effort/picked something semi-obscure.
(Ktulu O'Ryleh float like a turd, sting like chlamydia, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 3:52, 3 replies)

This is turning just into a listing....
...So I'll join in!

To be honest I am easily impressed, for instance I love the Alien v Predator movies because I love both of their originals, the movies could be the predator and the aliens dancing to the time warp for 2 hours and I'd still think its amazing.

However my favourite movies are:

V for Vendetta: Not only does it have the best monologue

"V: Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villian by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. (he carves a "V" into a sign) The only verdict is vengence; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. (giggles) Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.
Evey: Are you like a crazy person?
V: I'm quite sure they will say so."

in a movie in my opinion, but it also has a view of the future which is totally believable in the short run. It has an awesome main character in a cool mask which I WILL be buying for Halloween and it also has a rather heart warming ending where the people finally stand up for themselves and show that a ruler should be scared of its people rather than the other way round and instills the message that one small person can make a huge difference.

28 Weeks later: Purely because of the artistic merit really, it has one of the best sound tracks ever (muse slightly over used, good song though) and some absolutely awesome camera shots (were the guy is standing on the wall for instance and the fighter jets zoom over, beautiful).

Iron man: Ok, I have recently become a bit of a Marvel geek and bought loads of comics. However this movie appeals to Marvel nerds and normal people (like me until recently) it has a good story, some really good jokes and some good old fashioned ass kicking.

Thats it for now I guess, tell me what you thought of these movies if you watch them as a result of this!
(Guilt wants to get in your moist confines, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 2:49, 1 reply)

in fact
this ties in nicely

i would rather watch a film of myself painting the walls with my own eyeball fluid (though i guess i'd be blind) than watch garden state again
(ladyintheradiator, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 2:05, 1 reply)

mm, gore
i can sit through most films. blood, guts, you name it. except brains. has anyone seen pi? i had to leave the room.

i am pathetic.
(ladyintheradiator, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 2:03, 1 reply)

garden state
i would rather paint a room with my own eyeball fluid than watch this film again.
(ladyintheradiator, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 2:01, Reply)

not the best
but deserves mention. All of my fav's have already been posted but one.

I went down

www.imdb.com/title/tt0126344/

well worth a watch

If anyone has a copy of "when Brendan met Trudy" please seed it, it's impossible to find
(knackerz is skinning up, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 1:31, 2 replies)