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This is a question B3TA fixes the world

Moon Monkey says: Turn into Jeremy Clarkson for a moment, and tell us about the things that are so obviously wrong with the world, and how they should be fixed. Extra points for ludicrous over-simplification, blatant mis-representation, and humourous knob-gags.

(, Thu 22 Sep 2011, 12:53)
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Scummy Mummies et al
Ladies of a dubious nature ,23 stone swamp donkeys wearing pink velour track suits ala jordan and £3 imitation Ugg boots with earings as big as bike wheels who let their spawn stand in shopping trollies what have they been walkin in previously People put food in them you know? WTF.Enormousley pregnant half wit mouthbreathing LADIES who walk though town with a top that stops way above the bump and show the world with great pride LOOK AT ME I HAVE HAD SEX a great distended blue veined mass complete with stretchmarks and the compulsory bellybutton adornment.Tramp stamps on show ,the fatter the bitch is the smaller the tattoo is Tinkerbell on the base of the spine of a trainee Sumo is not cannot and never will be deemed to be sexy .Pretentious names for their ofspring that is then indelibly stamped on the back of their dirt ingrained neck ,same spawn are destined to a life where they probably will not need a special name as they will most likely end up as a number in the Scrubs . After all this with the names thing Scummy Mummys give the brats special pet names as they talk to them like ----- F#####g dickhead C### You little Bastard which may be cos mummy is a single parent not to sure but as a term of endearment it is dubious to say the least .Poor little mites the first word that they utter is probably Macdonalds .Cafe owners on Facefook whos every meal is chippy ,macdonald , or pizza yet spend hours a day running THE CAFE ,Facefook Farmers who have 20 /30 hours a wekk toiling on the farm and have been signing on for ten years.On the other side off the spectrum but just as bad are sweet looking young things who upon opening their mouths would shock a docker ,using the moby and talking so every one for 20 yards can here one young thing the other day was telling her mate or it may have been her mum who knows? about blowing out the present BF because he would only do her up the wrong un when she really only wantd a good old fashioned shagging,this in the middle of Tesco,s WTF .How to fix this sterilization as standard at 11 like the 11 plus you had to take for people with an IQ of less than say 120 castration for the boys of course ,and by law all supermarket should have a chav beater on the door at all times .
(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 16:35, 25 replies)
Um...
What?
(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 16:41, closed)
W with a helping of TF?

(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 16:41, closed)
too stupid, didn't read.

(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 16:49, closed)
I'm guessing this guy's rung on the social ladder is 0.5mm above those he's describing, and he's just showing off the fact.

(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 17:24, closed)
Am I the only one to recieve a gaz from the wizard?
"FIRST OFF MY SOCIAL STANDING OR EVEN LACK OF SAME IS ABSOLUTLY AND CATORGORICALLY FUCK ALL TO DO WITH YOU. YOUR GUESS IS TOTALLY SO WRONG.READ A FEW OF YOUR POSTS AND MY GUESS IS YOU ARE A ANAL RETENTIVE MUNTER SO ANYHOW WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO DO IS SAY FUCK YOU AND THE DONKEY YOU ROAD IN ON .SANCTIMONIOUS TWUNT THAT YOU ARE ,REPLY IF YOU WISH I CARE NOT BUT YOU MEAN LESS TO ME THAN THE OBJECT I JUST FLUSHED AWAY"

He's got a point.
(, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 13:09, closed)
i did get one, yes.
he was ENRAGED.

'Forgive me but if you did not read my post how the #### do you know its stupid ????? One mans stupid is another mans wit ,being able to class something as stupid without actually reading it is a rare talent i am slightly in awe of you OH WAIT !!

I KNOW YOU WILL REPLY AS YOUR SOCIAL LIFE IS SO FULL YOU SPEND YOUR TIME WRITING DROSS AND TELLING PEOPLE YOU HAVNT READ SOME THING COS U KNOW ITS STUPID SO WHOS STUPID NOW STUPID??? LATERS'

blimey.
(, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 15:11, closed)
you missed out the bit about the Rocky Horror Picture Show????

(, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 16:07, closed)

Forgive me but if you did not read my post how the #### do you know its stupid ????? One mans stupid is another mans wit ,being able to class something as stupid without actually reading it is a rare talent i am slightly in awe of you OH WAIT !!

Could it be even possible ,dare i say it ?

ANYONE WHO FEELS A NEED TO TO MEMORISE THE ENTIRE SAD FIASCO
THAT IS the rocky horror show AND BOAST ON A WEBSITE ABOUT SAME IMO IS IN NEED OF STRONG DRUGS AND THERAPY AND AS SUCH LOSES THE RIGHT TO CALL SOMETHING I WROTE STUPID IF INDEED YOU HAD THE RIGHT IN THE FIRST PLACE I KNOW YOU WILL REPLY AS YOUR SOCIAL LIFE IS SO FULL YOU SPEND YOUR TIME WRITING DROSS AND TELLING PEOPLE YOU HAVNT READ SOME THING COS U KNOW ITS STUPID SO WHOS STUPID NOW STUPID??? LATERS
(, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 20:22, closed)
I got one too :D
Two actually.

@ MUMS

(wizard of goz, Tue 27 Sep, 14:47, ignore, delete, archive, reply)

and then

@ MUMS
MY MUMS DEAD BUT I FORGIVE YOU COS IT WAS ABOUT YOUR MUM REALLY!!
(wizard of goz, Tue 27 Sep, 14:48, ignore, delete, archive, reply)
(, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 20:06, closed)
The alternative
What I do is spend significant amounts of time in Asia, usually Thailand, where the people are generally lovely, can fit in normal clothes, and still support what you could call traditional values of respect for family and elders. It's not 100% paradise, but certainly way more pleasant than here. Going next on Wednesday, book now!
(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 17:43, closed)
I just read that as 'I enjoy the company of underage ladyboys'.

(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 17:52, closed)
Nobody would expect anything else.

(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 19:10, closed)
Tedious
Was that typed angrily using two fingers? Did you mouth the words as you were typing?
(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 17:49, closed)

I really feel this notion would have been conveyed better using proper grammar and spelling. Then again, this might just be clever satire and/or trolling.
(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 17:49, closed)
Heading towards irony that the grammar indicates a below average IQ...
which would mean he/she would be castrated/sterilised under their own law.
(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 18:18, closed)
That's really no way to talk about your mum.

(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 19:06, closed)


(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 19:06, closed)
And relax.

(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 19:14, closed)
Wow,
did you write this and then just throw punctuation marks randomly at it?
(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 20:09, closed)
I want to know what a verbal conversation with you would be like.

(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 22:03, closed)
Repeatedly headbutt a pineapple.
Should give you an idea.
(, Mon 26 Sep 2011, 22:05, closed)
Brilliant.
Simply fantastic.
Have a click.
(, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 9:13, closed)
How come I get no response?
I feel marginalised now :(
(, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 13:28, closed)
I'm guessing you wouldn't pass the 11 plus.

(, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 19:04, closed)
11plus

GUESS AGAIN ONLY 3 PASSED THE YEAR I DID AND IT WASNT EVEN A SPECIAL SCHOOL 1963 ST JOHNS TAMSIDE
(, Wed 28 Sep 2011, 13:12, closed)

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