b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke » Page 1 | Search
This is a question I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

Challenge: write a joke. As simple joke with a setup and a punchline.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT - IGNORING THIS COULD RESULT IN BAN

* Don't steal jokes - write them
* Don't flood post
* Just don't be a dick ok?

So join in and write a bad joke and apologise for it.

Read Latest | Highest Voted

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Wed 8 Aug 2018, 9:00)
Pages: Latest, 52, 51, 50, 49, 48, ... 4, 3, 2, 1

Tell Us Your Story »

A load of dogs have just escaped from the police station.
Luckily the police are currently out there chasing many leads.
(I helped save b3ta! Squiggy Alloria makes theme parks., Tue 8 May 2018, 10:33, 1 reply, 7 years ago)
The police station was being attacked by flies.
They had to call in the swat team!
(I helped save b3ta! Squiggy Alloria makes theme parks., Tue 8 May 2018, 10:33, Reply)
I made a musical cake.
It was a gateau blaster!
(I helped save b3ta! Squiggy Alloria makes theme parks., Tue 8 May 2018, 10:32, Reply)
I say
My wife went to the capital city of Indonesia.

Jakarta?

No. She went by plane.
(bezlightyear, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:32, 1 reply, 7 years ago)
When I went camping, I kept getting electric shocks.
It was a static caravan.
(I helped save b3ta! Squiggy Alloria makes theme parks., Tue 8 May 2018, 10:32, Reply)
I am going to give my piano to charity.
I will be an organ donor.
(I helped save b3ta! Squiggy Alloria makes theme parks., Tue 8 May 2018, 10:31, Reply)
How many drinks can a Prussian knight drink?
Two tonics.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:19, 1 reply, 7 years ago)
My wife reads a lot of early twentieth century literature examining class and hipocracy.
- Forster?

- no need, she loves them.
(I helped save b3ta! bounder not here that often, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:17, Reply)
Every new computer I get seems to come installed with a very posh AI with no name. I hate it.
I called support, but they told me to try Turing a Toff anon again.
(I helped save b3ta! blugg (it's all gone horribly wrong), Tue 8 May 2018, 10:17, Reply)
What do you call a skateboarding former UN Secretary General?
Boutros Boutros Gnarly!
(I helped save b3ta! mikeisbrill, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:14, Reply)
Which wrestler is most like a young horse?
Mick Foaly.
(I helped save b3ta! mikeisbrill, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:08, Reply)
How can you tell if the bin needs emptying?
Bin stinks (instincts)
(I helped save b3ta! Sheep!, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:05, 2 replies, latest was 7 years ago)
...
For years I've been using the phrase "Kruger-Dunning effect", which just goes to show.
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:04, Reply)
What do you do if you see a zebra vomiting?
Look both ways to make sure traffic has stopped and then vomit at your leisure.
(I helped save b3ta! mikeisbrill, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:59, 1 reply, 7 years ago)
Which video game member of the eulipotyphlan family Erinaceidae had a number one in 1998 with It Feels So Good?
Sonique The Hedgehog.
(I helped save b3ta! mikeisbrill, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:57, Reply)
What's #000000 and #FFFFFF and #FF0000 all over?
A newspaper dot com
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:56, Reply)
What four legged animal helps pollenation?
Most of a bee.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:49, 5 replies, latest was 6 years ago)
What smells of piss and doesn't work?
The House of Lords
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:45, 1 reply, 7 years ago)
What's the difference between USA and USB?
One has a white lead and never seems to be the correct way round, the other is is an industry standard that was developed to define cables, connectors and protocols for connection, communication, and power supply between personal computers and their peripheral devices.
(I helped save b3ta! christhebarker, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:38, 3 replies, latest was 6 years ago)
Some people think I'm a homophobe
but it only sounds that way.
(Star Wars Starwarsy McStarwars Face, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:37, 3 replies, latest was 7 years ago)
I went to an aquarium and there was a fish singing Dean Martin songs.
I asked one of the staff, "What's that fish singing?"
He replied, "That's a Moray".
(I helped save b3ta! Smallbrainfield, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:36, Reply)
What do you call an arachnid wearing white gloves and shouting, "r u on 1 matey?"
A house spider.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:35, Reply)
Why did the Shetland Pony keep his mouth shut?
He was a little hoarse.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:34, 1 reply, 7 years ago)
Why did Ken Livingstone cross the road?
Hitler.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:31, Reply)
Why did the pope cross the road?
To bless it.
(I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:29, Reply)
I just bought 2000 slices of spam in batter
I'm just frittering away my money.
(ccc, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:28, Reply)
What's the best place to buy a toaster?
A pop up shop.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:26, Reply)
Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock.
Who's there?
A spider with an erection.
(I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:20, 1 reply, 7 years ago)

Tell Us Your Story »

Pages: Latest, 52, 51, 50, 49, 48, ... 4, 3, 2, 1