what the fuck
you lot are making the research on my desk look interesting. and that research is about a tenant's rights if a landlord steamrollers in and carries out upgrades to a building without communicating them to the tenant. that is how bad you are.

now for chrissake pull your socks up. as sex seemed to get you going yesterday, let's ask:

how old were you when you found out what it was? who told you? did it scar you for life? of course in the cases of SOME PEOPLE, these questions are yet to be answered, but most of you should be ok.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:00, 135 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I was about 4.
mummy bought me a book cos I asked her where I came from.


I wish I hadn't asked.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:02, Reply)

Was it a book on the C18th European penal system?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:17, Reply)

lol penal

(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:18, Reply)

i'm not above talking to myself either, oh no
i don't remember being told, but i do remember marauding into the lounge with a fistful of tampax when i was about 5 and announcing to my parents' guests that they would come in "jolly useful" (i loved the 'famous five') if anyone had a nosebleed.

i also remember the film they showed us of a woman giving birth when i was 11. until that point it had never occurred to me that there would be blood. or pain. so much pain. and blood.

best. contraception. ever.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:03, Reply)

oh god I remember that video.
*shudders*
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:05, Reply)

Was that the film
Where thay had to cut the woman?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:12, Reply)

That was 'Faces of Death'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:17, Reply)

Saw the same film when eleven
It has ensured my genes will not be passed on.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:21, Reply)

I found out when I was about six or seven, from the kid who was molesting me. Only a little molestification.
I'm not scarred by it at all. These things happen.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:04, Reply)

i remember my mum telling me years later
that she explained everything when i was about 5 and i seemed fairly nonplussed. what she didn't realise was that my little brother, who was 3 and as nosy as they come, was earwigging. halfway through unloading the shopping onto the conveyor belt at sainsburys, he announced thoughtfully, "mummy, has that bulb dropped out of your front bottom yet?"

this is why children should never be born.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:06, Reply)

My mum told me properly, all of the ins and outs, when I was 10 or 11
and she made things a lot clearer.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:09, Reply)

Thank fuck for you
My poor tiny brain couldn't cope with attempting to work out where to begin. I actually spent time doing the job I'm being paid for. Let's never speak of it again.

For me, sex was one of those intangible mysteries, like pornography or an 18-certificate film back when such things were regulated, that everyone seemed to talk about and a few claimed to have experienced first-hand, but I had no knowledge of, or opportunity to gain the same. I blame my education at an all-boys' school, which robbed me of both the chance to meet women - any women, at all - and anything resembling a shred of self-confidence. Oh, and my own natural hideousness. Obviously.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:08, Reply)

As regards the question you were actually asking, no idea
Probably a sex ed video when I was about 10. It had a family on a nudist beach. Mum, Dad, son, daughter, about our age, all completely bollock naked and apparently comfortable with this.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:15, Reply)

Mate's brothers who had sex education classes in primary school told us 'cus we were in the year bellow.
Before we all thought it was just kissing.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:09, Reply)

You had a special year for people who shouted and blew air onto fires?

(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:12, Reply)

I like this

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:38, Reply)

I'm not quite sure.
I remember being told the sterile bits, but along with being taught to swear, I learned it in primary school. I wasn't that bothered.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:09, Reply)

Nonce question is noncey

(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:11, Reply)

Totally.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:12, Reply)

i have to bow to your expertise here
given your penchant for molesting the b3ta teen queens!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:18, Reply)

AA's in his 20s now.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:22, Reply)

You're getting me confused with the other loud liberal spastic.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:27, Reply)

He was the only youthful tranny I could think of.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:30, Reply)

I cant remember but I do remember knowing that there was no way I was ever going to let a boy do that to me.
My little sister however got an hours instruction with diagrams by me at about the age of 11. She went to Catholic school.
( girlinthehole, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:16, Reply)

the nuns at the catholic school i went to (for a year, it was clearly never going to happen!)
had glued all the pages on repro together in our library.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:24, Reply)

I went to a Catholic convent school,
the sections on evolution and reproduction in our biology textbooks were sealed with the same "go and talk to a priest" sticker. For about six minutes after we were issued them.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:29, Reply)

I went to a Catholic school
and we were taught evolution and reproduction, but NOTHING on sex itself.
We were, however, shown a video of 'foetuses' in skips and incinerators, and told that this was inhuman, immoral etc etc.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:32, Reply)

Tell the whiney tenant to shut the fuck up
In the alternative is there substantial interference with their quiet enjoyment.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:16, Reply)

the tenant is my client this time
i don't want to get fired, much as i am a fan of your toughlove.

good guess, that is indeed any tenant's argument, combined with the slightly more nebulous breach of the implied covenant not to derogate from grant.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:19, Reply)

Good Guess?!? I'm insulted, I was king of the fri lease back in the day

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:25, Reply)

that's a title few would want
king of the F R I.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:27, Reply)

FUCK YOU

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:33, Reply)

you wish!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:42, Reply)

I have genuinely no idea, cannot remember at all.
I clearly didn't consider finding out about it to be a major event in any way.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:21, Reply)

Oh monty, you and your drugs, it was last week down the turkish baths.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:21, Reply)

The next day I thought
'I don't remember hurting my bottom yesterday, how weird'


It all makes sense now.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:25, Reply)

I'm suprised it hurt you, hardly touched the sides, you big poof you.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:32, Reply)

Gay as a window, me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:35, Reply)

Gay Open
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:39, Reply)

I don't remember actually
However I read sci-fi and fantasy books from the age of about seven, genres which are notoriously stuffed with bad sex scenes so it was probably that. It definitely gave me a broader picture of what's 'normal' anyway, since those same genres are not notoriously vanilla
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:24, Reply)

i remember finding a trashy novel that someone had left in our villa in greece when i was about 8
the characters (she was called january. who the fuck is called january?) got to bed and she was reluctant but went ahead. he put his hand between her legs, withdrew it and said, "christ january, why didn't you tell me you had the curse?"

this mystified me for years. i genuinely thought it was some kind of evil spell.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:26, Reply)

Even I'm not too sure what that means.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:34, Reply)

It means "Trim that shit"
Obviously January had the curse of the lycanthrope.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:35, Reply)

I hate pubic hair in all its forms on women.
It's a fucking curse.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:39, Reply)

i have one of those lasers now
the whole lot will soon be gone permanently. byebye having red hot wax poured all over me and ripped off at the roots!

although the thought of pressing a laser to an area that god only meant to be touched with the most featherlike of caresses and then zapping it is quite unnerving, frankly.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:42, Reply)

I'm jealous.
My friend considered getting it done, the price of it probably would be worth never having to shave your legs again.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:44, Reply)

I thought about getting one but results seem to vary.
Keep us posted. Not literally.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:46, Reply)

well this one was £300 from boots and i am doing it myself
the salon near me offers a deal for £3000 where you can go for treatment anywhere over 3 years. i am thinking of getting them to do my legs, it's a bit too much effort to do my entire legs by myself! the salon said that the boots one wouldn't work because the laser isn't powerful enough, but of course they would say that.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Yeah I'm on about buying one rather than going to a salon
So I'd be interested in your findings.
I have very pale skin and apparently it works best on that so fingers crossed.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:16, Reply)

I'm inclined to agree with you
Trimmed at the very least.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:43, Reply)

Now I find this a difficult concept to grasp.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:44, Reply)

I find body hair in general icky
Like, I know Amanda Palmer's making a statement and all, but every time I see her underarm hair I want to puke.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:48, Reply)

Leg hair, underarm hair... It's really odd and really nasty.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:49, Reply)

I'm shuddering just thinking about it
Grim.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:50, Reply)

So you dislike periods and body hair.
But can't use "instance" correctly. You're about 50/50 approval at the moment.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:51, Reply)

When did I use "instance" incorrectly?
Edit: *coughs* Can't see where...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:53, Reply)

Trimmed certainly
but it's not a curse, it does stop you looking like a pre pubescent girl
(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:45, Reply)

This is why I can't fully agree
It depends on the woman of course, but a brazilian covers all bases perfectly.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:47, Reply)

I do not understand Brazillians.
They are bizarre.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:48, Reply)

I'm ok with them
It means it's kept neat and tidy, and the *sighs* labia area is left void of hair.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:52, Reply)

But it's just a strip. Of hair. Which is nasty.
You may as well use like a spoon's more wax and have it all off.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Hear hear

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:56, Reply)

tut tut baldy cnut

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:59, Reply)

I did a LOL

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:15, Reply)

I agree
But some girls blessed with youthful looks tend to look a bit pre-pubescent with nothing there, and that's just wrong.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:58, Reply)

A brazilian covers very little
but it means that there is still hair/tongue contact.
So surely a Hollywood is more considerate.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:48, Reply)

It is Roota, it is
But some girls don't like to get rid of it all, and it's their choice.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:49, Reply)

Are we on that Sunday morning debate with Nicky Campbell?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:50, Reply)

Haha!
I'm sure this topic would get a few sternly worded letters of complaint.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:51, Reply)

There's a weird double-standard though
where men don't really feel the same need, although really it's just as required.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:53, Reply)

I feel the need to keep trimmed
but I'm not waxing for anyone, and I have the same standards for women.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:55, Reply)

Same same
Always trimmed.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:57, Reply)

Good men trim.
Facial and chest hair is nice on men.
Leg hair I don't mind.
All armpits should be bald.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:55, Reply)

I have no chest or back hair
I used to shave my armpits, but was mocked for being 'weird'.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:57, Reply)

You're in the right there

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:59, Reply)

Which way, that it's weird, or that armpit hair is disgusting?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:00, Reply)

armpit hair is horrible
I don't like excess hair on men or women though.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:01, Reply)

I stopped shaving because my ex hated that I did it
Now I know it's not just me that hates armpit hair, it's coming off tonight.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:03, Reply)

Make mini-mohawks

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:05, Reply)

Yes!!
This is going to happen.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:06, Reply)

Pictures.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:10, Reply)

I don't know.
I love smooth bodies but that's more because it's natural. I've had a couple of boys who due to race have been practically hairless, and it's amazing. But a waxed chest or whatever is just a little weird.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:02, Reply)

But if you have to shave, wax or pluck, then it clearly isn't natural is it?

(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:03, Reply)

No, I am not phrasing that well.
I like a naturally smooth body. Formative experiences innit.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:05, Reply)

i would only ever go hollywood
i think a brazilian just looks like you missed a bit!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:58, Reply)

She was riding the crimson wave

(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:37, Reply)

i worked this out when i moved onto jilly cooper some 2 years later
my mother would have gone ballistic if she had found out how much middle-aged grot i consumed as a child.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:41, Reply)

I nearly failed my second year exams because I got engrossed in Jilly Coopers "Rivals" and "Polo" during my revision sessions
well, that and I suffered a slight nervous breakdown around that time.

But I mainly blame Jilly Cooper.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:44, Reply)

Ditto with my reading material
My parents were big on letting me read what I want/ having my own computer from about age 10 (back when that wasn't really widespread) and yet they had a massive bee in their bonnet about tv. I do wonder if they realise just how much more books get away with
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:44, Reply)

i remember sneaking down to whsmith to buy "riders" when i was about 12 with my pocket money
the strapline read "sex and horses: who could ask for more" and i wholeheartedly agreed with this sentiment. some nosy old bag in the shop saw me clutching it to my eager flat little chest and said "i don't think you should be buying that, dear." so then they wouldn't sell it to me.

interfering old hag.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:57, Reply)

She wanted it for herself
I bet she took it into the back room and flicked her withered bean to it.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:59, Reply)

In that case WHY THE FUCK DID SHE NOT SAY SO

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:41, Reply)

^THIS
It is not a nice surprise, and whilst I'm nice and gentlemanly enough to gloss over it (not a euphemism) I'd prefer a 'heads up' (might be a euphemism).
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:44, Reply)

Urghghghghhgghg
It's just...manky. And disturbing.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:46, Reply)

oh, in the book
she had some stress and she'd completely forgotten about it.

why danielle steel couldn't have used words that an 8 year old might have understood is another question.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:56, Reply)

She'd fallen to the communists

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:45, Reply)

I suspect I was around ten.
I have vague recollections of a rare two-car visit to my nan's, in order that my father could drive me home separately from the rest of the family, hand me a pile of books and inform me that if I had any questions I should read them again more carefully.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:25, Reply)

Did you stop off at some secluded woodland on the way, too?
God my dad used to do that ALL THE TIME.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:28, Reply)

Given the amount of affection he has shown me since,
if we did I must have asked if it was in yet.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:31, Reply)

Schoolboy error.
Literally.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:34, Reply)

Aged around 9 or 10
Me and my friends were climbing and playing in a building site, and found a few dog-eared copies of Razzle and Mayfair. Later on, one lad found his Dad's porn stash and we were introduced to the seedy world of 80s German porn, including anal and golden showers.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Glass coffee tables.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:31, Reply)

I think it was a glass dining table
Woman got spitroasted over it, then pissed on.
Edit: Oh, and one was called "Doppel Faust"...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:32, Reply)

I got one of those, seems a bit pointless for that though, surely it would be like walking into greggs and being satisfide with just the smell a cake.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:37, Reply)

There was a bush near the local cricket fields that always had smut mags in, and another bit by a local common.
We always moved it from there to our secret base in the local park, but 'cus the base was so shit (not much more than a wigwam without the sheet bit) we lost it every couple of weeks to build a new one, and therefore couldn't find the stash of tramp smut.

One day one of my friends took the smut home because we wern't going via the base when we spotted it, but his mum found out and phoned up all the other mums to say she's found us playing with pornography. Half the parents laughed, one was releaved to confirm hetrosexualty and a few kids got grounded on the basis of keeping up appearances.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:36, Reply)

It's a bygone world sadly denied the boys of the 'digital age'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:39, Reply)

Nowadays pure filth is available with but a Google search.
They'll never know the thrill of finding porn stashes.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:40, Reply)

*stares wistfully into the middle distance*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:44, Reply)

I find a porn stash in a hotel room in Euston a couple of years back
It was quite well hidden.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:55, Reply)

First thing I do when in a hotel room
Is hunt for porn.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:01, Reply)

I do now!

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:04, Reply)

STOP THE PRESSES
One of my workmates noticed me enjoying the orgasmic musical extravaganza that is Bon Jovi's "Bad Medicine" and upon being informed of the name of the song, asked if it was by Def Leppard

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

RSwipe, you're a lawyer, isn't there some kind of loophole making beheading acceptable in such a circumstance?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:38, Reply)

YEAH, WHAT AN IDIOT!!!
Imagine mixing up one middle of the road gay-as-shit 80s pop-metal act with another!!!11!!!!!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:40, Reply)

He probably can't tell the difference between 'Poison' and 'Tygertailz' either!!!!!!!!!
Can you believe people like that actually exist???
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:41, Reply)

You should hand in your notice.
Imagine if people found out you worked with SUCH A KNOB????
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:42, Reply)

I have to say I'm very pleased that you're as annoyed by this as I am Monty
I really expected derision rather than support. How touching *sniff*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:48, Reply)

Innit *sniffs*
Ah, that's better. CRANK UP THE 'JOVI', FOXO!!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:55, Reply)

*cranks*
*rocks out*

Cock remains mercifully not out.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:57, Reply)

You take that 'metal' word out of there this instant!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:41, Reply)

£100 says both acts could be found on the TV-ad-only compilations
'Soft Metal' and 'Precious Metal', voice overs by Tommy Vance.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:44, Reply)

That does not make them metal in anyone's opinion other than the idiot who put the album together
I give you the "Now that's what I call music" albums. Very little content on any given volume could accurately be called music.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:50, Reply)

I think this is a good point, and very well made

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:51, Reply)

Thank you very much
There are plenty of examples outside of the world of compilations, too. Most recently, Take That's "Progress". Really? Their "Greatest Hits" album also represents possibly the most misplaced "S" ever.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:56, Reply)

And there was me having you down as a lifelong A-Ha fan.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Ha hole
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:56, Reply)

InstanT, Labs, come on.
You're better than this.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:44, Reply)

No he isn't.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:45, Reply)

Shitarse

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Yeah', BJ doesn't have any tattos, deffo not metal.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:57, Reply)

He has actually
But they're pretty small and insignificant.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:59, Reply)

So guess he's half heavy metal?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 11:30, Reply)

if there were a law making beheading acceptable
i would have invoked it on many previous occasions.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:40, Reply)

Examples please
I can't wait to hear this
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:46, Reply)

they aren't that interesting sadly
shit men, shit clients. that's about it!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:54, Reply)

Is there any other kind of men?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 10:59, Reply)