Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Oh my, you're looking very sharp today, did you do something different with your hair?It's due to be a stunningly sunny couple of days in my little bubble. Have a little daydream: how do you like spending sunny days when you've got no other responsibilities?
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:18,
176 replies,
latest was 15 years ago)
I imagine you've got some kind of floral parasol that brings out the colour of your eyes.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:20,
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Yes, matched with floaty dresses and a charming smile.You know me well, Noely Noel.
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thealternativefact, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:21,
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I can but dream, dear.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:24,
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And a big jug full of ice cool home made lemonaid, two big jugs even !I like picturing your two big jugs with cooling and revitalizing condensation seeping down them.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:32,
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Don't be rude.Go to Asda and buy some bedding.
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thealternativefact, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:34,
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wait, what? I put bedding on my bed last night. Fresh clean sheets. Worst night's sleep I've had in ages.I think I need a dyson bladeless fan.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:37,
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Is it that time of year already?Also, happy Passover.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:38,
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It is, that reminds me, my underpants needs turning inside out.Thank you, happy passover to you too.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:49,
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Honey, I get passed over every fucking day.*sads*
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:55,
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Yeh', the whole shibang.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:45,
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I'll check later for you Clenders :p(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:48,
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I like hiding round the corner from your houseand trying to sabotage your life, for the lolz.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:19,
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I'm the Inspector Gadget to your Dr Claw.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:20,
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No, I'm the Ian Huntley to your Wells & Chapman.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:22,
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Why, thank you Noel.Yes, I did do something different with my hair. Hahahahaha, nah I'm kidding, it's still the same old spiky mess that it's been sine about 1987.
I spend sunny days mashing my keyboard. Although I may go to the beach later.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:19,
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It's in a wave then?(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:24,
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Somewhat horribly, my hair does go quite wavy when it gets long.This. Is. Not. A. Good. Thing.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:26,
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I saw a bit of the new Nickleback video the other dayjesus lookalike rock god Chad Kroeger has died his hair platinum blond and straightened it into a bob, it looks so fucking odd it's hard to describe.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:28,
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Thank fuck.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:30,
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Sorry Noel, I'm still half asleep.Domestic traumalols are also making my brain fuzzy.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:32,
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S'ok, it was incredibly vague, I'm amazed anyone spotted it amongst the trivial shite I normally spout.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:39,
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That's one of the most dangerous words you can say in this housealong with 'park', 'field', 'pond', and 'pepperami'. And, surprisingly, 'uncle geoffrey'.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:46,
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Is that some kind of weird dance?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:23,
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You never start threads. This is bad.Start it anyway - Noel will learn to cope....somehow....
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:29,
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Well what do you expect from someone who comes from an area containing Hoe Lane and Cocking? My life is one giant innuendo.
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Kroney, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:34,
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I'm hungover it hurts I'm going to spend the day moaning about how hungover I am.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:25, Reply)
Chilling in a beer garden with friends, watching the world go byAnd by 'world' I mean pretty smiling women in floaty dresses. Like Clendrix.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:26,
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This works toobut only if you've got someone to go with. Sitting in a beer garden on your own is just sad.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:27, Reply)
Hence i said with friends ;)In the absence of friends, I'd prefer to go cycling through the countryside.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:33,
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I think that possibly one of the most awesome afternoons everwas that Monday in the park in Edinburgh after the Edinbash. Good times.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:27,
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Presumably only because I wasn't there, you bastard.(
thealternativefact, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:29,
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It would have been even more awesomer if you had been.Still, we'll always have Dirty Dick's...
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:30,
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I was quite happy climbing that huge hill. There were firemen practising their rope skilz.(
thealternativefact, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:31,
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Geoff's Sofa?(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:32,
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Andrew's couch?(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:33,
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I've been thinking about organising another Edinbash for next year.What do you reckon?
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:33,
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Too early for me to say yes for sure, but it might work...(
thealternativefact, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:36,
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BARBADOS!(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:38,
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BARBIEDOLLS!(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:39,
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I fucking wishI struggle to live within my means, but I'm having a good month.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:44,
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No, she went of her own accord.*Mindpiss*
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:44,
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Scunthorpe it is, then.(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:39,
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York's a reasonable call.Not much in the way of clubs but some very nice pubs, I'm led to believe.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:40,
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Tacky.(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:41,
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I've been to Blackpool.It really is quite unpleasant as I recall.
This was over 20 years ago, mind.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:43,
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It's still a hole. I went there on a stag last year and it is fucking grim.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:49, Reply)
I imagine it as being like the green room ata Jeremy Kyle show(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:56,
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The pubs and clubs are exactly like that. You can only tell women from men because the men can spit further.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
I think we should get an apartmentand go up at festival time for a couple of days.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:39, Reply)
that has got to be the worst possible time to visit Embrait's full of bloody furrins that won't get out of your bastard way.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:42,
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clendrix has got a penis?I must say, this doesn't surprise me.
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:33,
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It was a very nice pub just behind Princes Street.The missus did a particularly fruity shit in the loos there and nearly killed the next person to go in. The poor woman came back out visibly traumatised. And green.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:35,
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I'm witty too(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:34,
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Really?I must have missed the one time you stopped being on your phone long enought to be witty
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:50,
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Are there any girls on here that like the sun?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:29,
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Don't get me wrong, I like the sun.I just burn incredibly easily.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:29, Reply)
Again this seems to be a themei go a nice golden brown, no burning for me, just a little cancer later on
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:31,
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In a shocking display of ironymr b3th worked in Africa for years, never wears more than a t-shirt unless the temperature dips below 5 degrees, and has probably never seen a bottle of sun cream in his life. When he did get cancer, though, it had absolutely nothing to do with his skin. It's like those people that live to 100 and smoke every day for 80 years.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:51,
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Me, I love the sunshine.especially since I lost a load of weight and being out in it no longer makes me a fat, sweaty mess.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:31, Reply)
I'm always a sweaty mess in the sun.jusst don't cope well with heat.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:35, Reply)
Same with me, even when I was skinny.(
Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:36,
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Hello darling.How are you?
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:43,
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Good Ta. was thinking about you the other day while in the ABC shop. They had a dirty great picture of Southwark Bridge on the wall above the british television section and I was thinking about that time we went to Eat together. All well with you and the Russian Woman?
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:44, Reply)
That was a lot of fun, even if it did highlight how much of a fucking idiot I am :)Russian Woman is fine, da. Things are going well.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:50,
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yeah good times.I have a great photo of us too that occasionally comes up on my random photos screensaver.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
Of you and Crow or me and you?The photos of me and you are dreadful due to my amount of pissedness...
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:55,
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to be fair - I was *fairly* pissed that night.Amberl said she was surprised I didn't Hurl. :P
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:57, Reply)
I was fairly far gone if I recall correctly.I remembered with a sickening lurch that I'm not going to be able to drink until FRIDAY.
Actually, that's not that long, is it? Silly antibioticas.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:00,
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I never used toand I still don't deal with it very well if it's humid, but when I went to Spain in September it was 30+ every day and it was great. My ex was dying, though.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:37, Reply)
Nah, humid or dry, I just don't deal with heat well.I need a cool environment.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:39, Reply)
With ducks. I like ducks.And nice smelling things in the park and good friends and gin and ginger ale.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:29,
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NOELLERSHow goes it?
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:36,
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Dandy and that, yeah!And your lovely self?
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:37,
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Stressed but recovering from the illz.Seeing my mother today. Which is exciting.
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Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:38,
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I like to spend them in a darkened room, writing poetry about how no-one understands me or my music, and self-harming. And making up 'Jimmy Hillers' on the internet.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:30,
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I thought you like sunny days as it was a good excuse to release yourself from the tree you are usually tied to.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:32,
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I had a dream last night that I'd had my hair cut into a 50s greaser quiff.It looked quite good. When I woke up, I went into the bathroom and in my sleep my hair had formed itself into a kind of quiff.
MY DREAM WAS A PREMONITION.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:49,
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It looked pretty good, I am actually quite tempted.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:56,
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I think I can draw this matter to a conclusionI frequently sport a quiff when my hair is of the appropriate length (ie not now)
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)
Oh dear, what was i up to, cheeky scamp that i am(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:44,
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Bumming a dead tramp round the back of the bins.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:50,
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Poor old george, he never should have carved that rat into a crack pipe(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:51,
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I like to walk the dog whilst wearing an oversized pair of sunglasses and an inflated sense of self worth. (, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:37, Reply)
Why, thank you. I *am* looking pretty 'fly' today. How nice of you to notice.My happiest way to enjoy nice weather is th hang out with a bunch of my favouritest people, listening to music, talking, playing with the dog, and possibly drinking something ice cold.
Then having a nice afternoon nap in the shade.
EDIT: Hey everybody look at the 2nd popular page on the image challenge it's me i'm popular people love me vote for me vote for me vote for me huh please willya huh look at me everybody look at me somebody love me oh god i might as well just cut myself nobody loves me.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:38,
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Good morrow, Internet NemesisHow does this lovely Spring day find you?
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:43, Reply)
well, it came in through the window,moved the curtain, lifted the duvet and happy slapped me on the back of my retinas.
I have now had some caffeine and I feel relatively competent.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:48,
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I couldn't help but flinch at thatI get well freaked out by anything remotely eye-pain related. *shudder*
I had jalapenos last night and consequently had to stop for a poo on this morning's run. I know you like to be kept abreast of these things.
Hehehe
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:50, Reply)
Yes, I'd already seen that, thank you.I'm really not as scatalogical as you seem to think.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:52,
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Why are you so keen on me then?It's certainly not my looks, confidence or personality. I assumed it was my poo-related japery
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:57, Reply)
InterestinglyI was talking to mr b3th about what happened here yesterday, and I said (of you) 'You know that one we saw on tv'.
His response? Genuinely, with absolutely no prompting: 'Is he gay?'
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:00,
Reply)
HahahaThis is of absolutely no surprise to me. It would have been less damning had the section when Anne quizzed me on my Ballroom skillz made the broadcast cut, but I was getting called a bender long before I learned to Waltz
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
To be fairI think it's because, in his eyes, any man i ever talk to is either gay or trying to get in my knickers.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:04,
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Is Jalapeno that Spanish guy you mentioned before?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:53,
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click, dammitI'll forgive you the grammatical error. Just cos I likes ya
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)
Chuck us a link then, daft case.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:51,
Reply)
You see that button up there that says Image Challenge? Duh!Also: http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/yesornotoav/popular/page2
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:54,
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Yeah, if you want to pimp for clicks, just link straight to the post, we're all fuck-lazy.(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:58,
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Is that the second popular page or just the second page?(
Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:00,
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Second popular page booooyyyyyy!I am an attention whore, and I don't care who knows it.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:01,
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Oh snap!5th down on second popular page for Old Time Adverts, sweet! Almost popular!
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Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:06,
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Based on the usual pimp-whore relationship dynamicIt should be someone who has more attention than they know what to do with, but still occasionally takes it from their whores to keep them in line.
Monty, then.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:15, Reply)
I'm going to make chicken and bacon caesar salad and eat it on the roof gardenAlcohol will probably be involved
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:52,
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STRIKETHROUGH 'L' END STRIKETHROUGH AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:57,
Reply)
Is this the first in a new wave of postmodern strikethroughs?Or are you just a lazy twat with your keyboard stuck on caps lock
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)
I'm feeling tanned and fit todayafter a tremendous weekend + Monday off.
I'd like to be at the beach, pissing about. Or having a BBQ. Beer would be involved in all activities.
I cannot wait for Friday when real holidays begin
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:52,
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Alas I cannotI am at my Mam and Dads that weekend. My apologies to you all
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:54,
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I trust a good time will be had by all(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 10:55,
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having just booked a holiday with some girlfriends, i can tell you that it will be:- lying around the pool/beach
- eating lots of fresh fish and fruit
- drinking icy cold vodka and chilled dry wine
- lounging on a catamaran
- reading many books
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:14,
Reply)
I didn't think you ate fish.Are you not a vegetarian? I am confused now.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:33,
Reply)
no, i ave zero principles. i am just fussyi eat what i like. i hate meat, so i don't eat any of it. but i like white fish and salmon. so i eat that.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:39,
Reply)
Playing cricket, having a few ciders, shouting drunken abuse at my mates while they try to bat etc.(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:16, Reply)
That sounds fucking brilliantApart from the bit about cider. We should totally organise a b3ta cricket match.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:20, Reply)
I don't believe I'm familiar with that euphemismIn fact, my bowling action can be described as "fuck-awful"
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)
Nothing much to do with bowling I'm afraidwww.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Bowling%20from%20the%20pavillion%20end
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)
I assumed it was to do with bumderingI feel most ashamed of myself, especially as an avid cricket fan. Can't help but wonder how many times I've heard that and thought nothing of it
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:36, Reply)
Try not to dwell on it.So do you play much? I used to play loads when I was in my teens, but still go down to Lancashire once a year with my old team for a 3 day cider/cricket/footie/pool/darts session.
Since me and the ex parted ways a year or so back I've found considerably more time in my calendar so I've started playing for a local team. I'm enjoying it more than ever. The dressing room banter is brilliant.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:48, Reply)
No, haven't played in yearsI show absolutely no aptitude for sport whatsoever and were we to organise a match, would embarrass myself thoroughly. But I would still bloody love it.
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:51, Reply)
Are you not? How remiss of me - it's a personal favourite.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:32,
Reply)
A run down by the riverFollowed by sitting in a beer garden watching the football, if I could think of a single pub in Norwich with a TV outside
(, Tue 19 Apr 2011, 11:22, Reply)
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