Morning all!
I slept for nearly 12 hours last night, after yesterday being told that my role in my company is being changed slightly, and that I'll have more to do. All in all, I feel great this morning!

How are you lot doing?

Alt: Marmite banned in Denmark. Regardless of whether you're a lover (Vipros, Me, etc) or a hater (Kitty, Berk, etc), what's your opinion on having a food banned for having 'added vitamins and minerals'?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 8:53, 146 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Morning
I'm pretty good, got into work early as I'm leaving early to go down to That There London to see QI being taped. Woo!

Marmite is shit and should be banned everywhere for being shit, rather than for having shit added to shit.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 25 May 2011, 8:54, Reply)

Lucky bastard.
There was one recorded last week I want to see. It had Sue Perkins, Brian Cox and Ross Noble on it. I'm not a big fan of Sue, but the other two could be interesting.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I quite like Sue Perkins.
she looks a bit like a lesbian version of my mrs
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:05, Reply)

I don't particularly dislike her
She's just not very interesting
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:15, Reply)

I hope the guests are good on QI
ie, not Rob Brydon.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:04, Reply)

he is shit

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:08, Reply)

Totally this^
Not funny at all, like a waklking bad Dad joke
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Apart from his Ronnie Corbett impression which is exemplary.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:15, Reply)

The impressions are good. It is just that he is a cunt.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:17, Reply)

You will not find me arguing with you on this point.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:20, Reply)

or the tiny man voice

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:18, Reply)

That really is good - and more than a little perturbing, I find.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:21, Reply)

Hope you get David Mitchell and Rich Hall.
I like them.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:13, Reply)

good choices

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:15, Reply)

Ooh, me too!

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Morning AA
I've had a traumatic morning thus far. Took the dog out for a walk this morning and he managed to get hold of a dead blackbird. I had to pick him up by his neck to sotp him swallowing it whole, wrestle him down to the ground and pin him down, then pull the bird out of his mouth, avoiding teeth and claws. To make things even worse, the bird's head also fell off during the struggle, covering me in blood!

How not to want anything to eat today, including Marmite!

Alt:
Vipper's suggestion of putting it on your toast with boiled eggs is champion. I now also add it to a cheese toastie
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 8:59, Reply)

Marmite and cheese are a magnificent combination
And that blackbird thing just sounds fucking awful!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:01, Reply)

It was!
I've just found beheaded bird blood on my coat sleeves
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:02, Reply)

The server is down at work, so I'm here looking busy. Otherwise I'm OK, thanks.
Are you getting more money for more work? If not, be very grumpy about it.

Marmite is the devil's shit, even if it has added vitamins.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:01, Reply)

Tbh, this is at a time when other people in my company are being made redundant
So I'm just glad to be having something to do.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:04, Reply)

I thought so.
I'll be grumpy for you then. This will not be much of an effort.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:05, Reply)

You are a Gumby AICMFP

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:11, Reply)

Everyone was a Gumby at my school.
And now a sketch about architects. Oh, how we laughed.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:16, Reply)

"I would put a tax... on all people... who stand... in water...OOH!"
I'd never seen any of the Gumby stuff until a few weeks back, so it's still amusing to me.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:20, Reply)

The best bit if Gumbyism is delivering the anasthetic.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:24, Reply)

I've not seen that one yet

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:27, Reply)

try here:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=M68GeL8PafE
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:30, Reply)

That is spectacularly unfunny

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Now you know how we feel everytime you post.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:52, Reply)

Hahahahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:09, Reply)

Bookmark that shit, yo.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:09, Reply)

I'm pleased to have dissapointed you.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:10, Reply)

Companies always use this as an excuse to fuck people over

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:23, Reply)

This company has been fucking me over for 4 1/2 years
I'm used to it, and applying for other jobs as we speak.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:27, Reply)

I'm alright, got a load of work to do today
off to solihull tomorrow. I can barely contain the joy.

alt: meh, their loss. I've been to Denmark a couple of times and found them to be a miserable and surly people.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I've only spoken to one Dane
and he was a miserable, humourless cunt. I can only assume the Vikings went on raids to get away from each other.
( Kroney, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:11, Reply)

Oh man there was this great B3ta 'JohnTheDane'? He was SO AWESOME.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:12, Reply)

^ AQI *and* misuse of 'awesome' by me here.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:14, Reply)

I have long harboured a desire to visit Christiana (is that the name?)
Did you go there?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:11, Reply)

fuck yeah
it was awesome. great band playing Bond themes in the street. great food, more drugs than you can shake a stick at.

We got in there, scored loads of fine weed and shrooms, a few pre-rolleds then sat smoking them in a little garden with a guy leaning against a rock carved with runes playing a mandolin.

Then we lost 4 hours somehow. By the time I left I was pretty much tripping from having smoked so much. Then we had to try and get back to the train station and get to a festival.

edit: Christiania is what it is called
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:17, Reply)

I want some of that shit in my life.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:18, Reply)

it was splendid
the mushrooms were unreal. I ate 4 stalks and was beautifully off my face for hours. I can still vividly remember all the bright colours and crazy things I was thinking. For a long time I was actually concerned that I would never get that amazingly high again.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:23, Reply)

I'm doing some Scottish mushrooms at Hawkwind on Saturday, courtesy of a superb B3tan.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:36, Reply)

We deal with a decent sized Danish company every week
Next time they come over, we'll offer them some for breakfast...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:17, Reply)

I'm just up the road from Solihull
I generally avoid it these days, although I spent much of my 20's drinking myself unconscious in The Saddlers Arms.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:32, Reply)

Morning all, has the sun brought out your sunnny sides today?
Working from home in my pants at the moment about to have a nice kipper tie. Hump day today, it's dowhill all the way to the bank holiday from midday onwards.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:23, Reply)

*pants fives*

( Kroney, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:26, Reply)

Seems like a pretty retarded reason to ban foods.
I'm alright although I overslept.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:24, Reply)

Did you have a few wee drinkies after all?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:35, Reply)

I had a bottle of cider,
did some work and watched Battle los angeles. It was so fucking cheesy I loved it.
Day three of my diet and I dreamt of Pain au Chocolate and Pork chops.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:39, Reply)

I dreamt about firing a problem employee.
He's not turned up for work today. Maybe I killed him with my psychic dream-skillz?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:41, Reply)

I think you probably rang up your samurai mates while drunk.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:43, Reply)

Oh no not again.
Did I ever tell you about what happened last time I did that?

Let me just that this - there are some prostitutes in the Huddersfield area that are in need of a manager.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:45, Reply)

Breakfast of Champions

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:44, Reply)

I bought some discs and pads for the car whilst on the sofa in my pants. I love the modern world.
So many activities now that used to require washing, dressing, interacting with other human beings etc can all now be done from your sofa, whilst only wearing pants. We truly are at the pinnacle of human civilisation.
( Kroney, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:25, Reply)

You can even buy more pants while only wearing pants. It is amazing.

( girlinthehole, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:27, Reply)

You could live dangerously, and not even wear pants to order stuff from the internet.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:28, Reply)

The sofa's leather
I can do without the rippage when I eventually do get up to stuff my fat inernet shut-in's face with more pies.
( Kroney, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:29, Reply)

That way you're only a single layer of bri-nylon away from crapping in your freezer, too.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:28, Reply)

You know those silicon ice-cube mould things?
I have something similar.
( Kroney, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:30, Reply)

My Surpriseometer must have run out of batteries - I'm getting no reading at all. Nothing.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:35, Reply)

I suggest you give a shake, clear out the valves.
Or purchase something made post-1972, I hear wonderful things about these "microchips" they keep talking about.
( Kroney, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:37, Reply)

That's Devil-talk, ye heathen bastard.
First it's these new-fangled 'spinning jennies', now this trickery.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:39, Reply)

I wouldn't bother,
they taste fucking horrible.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 25 May 2011, 9:43, Reply)

This post is so poor, somewhere in Somalia a jumble sale is being held to help it.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:47, Reply)

I've barely slept for two days, Monty.
I'm really sorry.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 25 May 2011, 9:49, Reply)

I'll overlook it - this time.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:53, Reply)

I'd be very grateful if you did.
I was up half the night with bloody heartburn. Hateful, utterly hateful.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 25 May 2011, 9:55, Reply)

I was up half the night with a sick daughter.
I have a horrible feeling I gave her my cold and it was a really unpleasant one.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:00, Reply)

I am catching up with everything including sleep.
My sister's pull out sofa bed is uncomfortable and I had to share with my nephew who, I have discovered, likes to fight monsters in his sleep.
( girlinthehole, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:26, Reply)

Im doing good
Wife and kids didn't wake up before I left this morning so had a nice relaxing cuppa got on my bike and rode to work. Got here to find the changing rooms were shut for refurbishment which meant I could use the disabled facilities guilt free and they have an awesome power shower with adjustable pressure and get hotter than the communal ones. Then got to my desk to find a cuppa waiting for me.

Marmite is fucking lush and any country that bans it for any reason should be nuked. Denmark, you've got a week and a bit to get your shit together, otherwise I'm blowing your country sky high!
( Peej, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:26, Reply)

That's a fairly croissant kind of morning.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:28, Reply)

it registers a solid 4.8
on the Briochter scale.
( Kroney, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:32, Reply)

V good

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:37, Reply)

I use the disabled bog all the time, mainly because we have NO disabled people so they are pointless

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:31, Reply)

Disabled people are pointless I agree.

( girlinthehole, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:32, Reply)

Oh I don't know, because of them I can park nice and close to the supermarket as they always have free places

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:33, Reply)

It's too little of a reward for the habit they have of always being in the way when you're trying to get past them in town.

( girlinthehole, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:34, Reply)

Some of them are fucking sexy though.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:48, Reply)

I put it to you that you do this because you are a fucking flid, and thus wholly entitled to used it.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:34, Reply)

I thought that you might
How are you today?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:35, Reply)

I'm pretty darned good, thank you gayboy.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:37, Reply)

I'd ask how you are, but feel that pretending to care is dishonest and might encourage dialogue.
I hope you understand.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:49, Reply)

Monty old boy...
Did you see BBC Breakfast this morning? The future Mrs Boyce was on - that Greek burd with the big knockers.

I have concluded that I probably would.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 9:53, Reply)

^Good LAD
b^.^d
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:01, Reply)

Keyboard broken Rorster?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 10:09, Reply)

Your post reminded me of AA's favourite website
www.truelad.com/
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:18, Reply)

I knew that, just pulling your leg
I'm not that kind of chap obviously. I anticipate a deeply religious experience with Dr Whatchamacallit.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 10:33, Reply)

You would fucking not, you swine.
HANDS OFF.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:02, Reply)

She wants me.
She told me that. Through my telly.

*books flights to that there London*
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 10:08, Reply)

If you lay so much as one finger on my beautiful bride-to-be I shall maim you with an adze.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:14, Reply)

More than just one finger Monts
Oh so much more than that.....
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 10:34, Reply)

I'm taking a day off.
This is my last day of unbooked leave left before I, erm, leave, so if I need to take any more days off I'm buggered, really.

I am very much looking forward to the next apocalypse, though.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 25 May 2011, 9:30, Reply)

Woo and Yay!

( girlinthehole, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:32, Reply)

Unfortunately I have "things to do".
The place is an utter pigsty at the moment. First up - hanging the towels out. Come the end of June, this is going to be my life...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 25 May 2011, 9:38, Reply)

Are you going to be a house husband?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:39, Reply)

Nah, but I will be taking a couple of months off while I take stock.
Which means that doing housey stuff will be a part of that as it's only fair.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 25 May 2011, 9:41, Reply)

I'n on a train
I just went through Milton Keynes, but no-one raped me. Though the lady who gave me breakfast did give the "come to bed eyes"
(Bazongaloid, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:30, Reply)

Did she give you the "come to bed coffee" though?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:31, Reply)

yes I'm on my second cup, if you know what I mean.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:35, Reply)

You mean it's slightly colder, slightly more bitter
definitively less satisfying and leaves you with a mild case of heart palpitations?
( Kroney, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:40, Reply)

That was you going through town?
I thought it was an earthquake.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:32, Reply)

Sure she's not just skagged off her tits?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:33, Reply)

You sound disappointed not to be raped Al

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:56, Reply)

'everyone has a rape fantasy' (c) Al, a Bash, once.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:01, Reply)

I have a poster of chompy lifting his tennis skirt to flash his arse...

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:02, Reply)

...which was the last thing you saw before the blindness

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:12, Reply)

Don't look directly at the sun,
everyone knows that.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:12, Reply)

*click*

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:19, Reply)

Morning our kid. Glad you still have a job to go to, even if it does involve working for dicks*
I'm mostly well narked this morning, despite having managed a new PB over 3 miles first thing. If anyone wants to order a tactical nuclear strike on the main offices of a well-know UK insurance company so that telecommunications are the last thing on their employees' minds, I'd be very grateful.

Alt: I don't get this love/hate Marmite thing, I think it's... OK.

*Your employers are dicks. Am not suggesting you get paid in dicks.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:48, Reply)

You haven't really thought this one through Marty
He spends most of his day dicking around on the internet committing gross misconduct and defaming his boss and company as a set of cunts; I wouldn't say that he passes any kind of muster as an employee of any sort really, let alone one to be trusted with the kettle and certainly not a computer.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:10, Reply)

Every day you come closer and closer in my mind to beatification.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:21, Reply)

Oh man I'm well on the way to becoming patron saint of the internet

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:26, Reply)

This statement is sounding dangerously JMG
Careful Rory
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:30, Reply)

Morning mate
How's it hanging today?

I have my half-yearly review to complete today. I have concluded that I am vital to the running of my company, and deserve a promotion and a hefty salary increase commensurate with my status.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 10:11, Reply)

Good for you sir
Get in there and show 'em the maker's name. Or something else Geoffrey Boycott might say.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:14, Reply)

"If you're gonna flash, flash hard"?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 10:18, Reply)

Perfect
You know your Boycott, sir. And you have my respect. When's the review?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:19, Reply)

*Doffs Yorkshire CC cap*
Why thank you kindly.

I do this bit online, but I'm going down south to meet my boss in July for the formal face-to-face carry on. Load of pish, but got to be done.

So what's new today?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 10:31, Reply)

Sorry mate,
detected "one of those days" in the offing and went to Tesco for sustenance. Not looking forward to the Championship next season I can tell you. Brighton and Southampton both look handy.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:47, Reply)

To be honest I hardly look at the Championship these days
Southgate fucking ruined Boro. How can someone go from being a player to a manager of a Premiership team without learning his trade at the lower levels? Steve Gibson the Chairman backed him well beyond the point at which he should have given him the heave.

Gordon Strachan isn't really the answer - he did ok at Celtic, but his first move at Boro was to bring in a load of 'ok' SPL-level players who just aren't good enough to break into the Premiership.

Meh.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 11:17, Reply)

I did wonder if Strachan's purchasing of half of Glasgow's players was some kind of experiment to prove how well Celtic & Rangers would do in England
You're quite right about Southgate not doing the apprenticeship down below. Am terrified about the potential for a mass exodus from Forest in the summer - afraid we might have blown our chance to go up. In which case we can be as bitter as each other for the next few months.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 11:20, Reply)

For me Southgate looked like a cheap option - instead of bringing in a proven manager
but that has kicked Gibson in the arse. They've gone down, and they'll never get back up. You pay peanuts and you get monkeys.

To be fair, some of the players he brought in were surplus to requirements upo north - Willo Flood hardly got into the Celtic 1st team, Steven McManus and Barry Robson were 'ok' but nothing more than that. Kris Boyd is a lazy poacher and has been found out, finally.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 11:39, Reply)

Yeah, Boyd struggles against anything other than Mickey Mouse defending
Couldn't believe how slow he was when I saw him at Forest. Wins a lot in the air but that's not really enough.

Still, cricket this weekend, eh?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 11:50, Reply)

He was totally bone idle for Rangers so it was hardly a surprise
Yes, cricket hopefully Saturday and Sunday. Let's see if the weather can behave itself this weekend though. I doubt it!

I had a bit of a disagreement with our skip last night. He doesn't fancy playing in the cup competition on Sunday 'cos we're playing a team 4 divisions above us and "we'll get beat". I told him that was a load of shite. We'll never improve as players or as a team if we don't play teams better than us. What kind of attitude is that for a captain? Shocking.

So what you up to? Any competitions on? How much training do you do with Miss Foxtrot? Do you do informal sessions at home, or go to proper studios? And can I get a pair of Ola Jordan's used nick-naks?
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 12:03, Reply)

Yeah your skipper's being a lazy knob
Where do you bat? Am assuming it's reasonably high up based on your run-making prowess. Do you bowl at all?

Got exams weekend after next (dancing, not written!) and a big comp the weekend after. The amount of training we do is a compromise between the amount she'd like to do and my desire to occasionally play Xbox and watch TV! Can't do it at home sadly, not enough space, but we're up the school three or four times a week, and sometimes in the park opposite our house in the summer. And I shall be meeting Ola Jordan in just over a month. I'll ask her.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 12:08, Reply)

Oh you beauty
That would be ideal. Best to wait until that tosser of a hubby isn't in the vicinty mind. Wouldn't want you getting your headlights put in on my account!

You dance in the park? Do you draw a crowd, or just strange looks?

I open the batting - for now. I just joined the club half way through last season and they had an established opening pair, but one of them is away at college in France at the moment so I appear to have pinched his spot until he gets back. However he was the top run-scorer last season so I've heard rumours that the other opener (my current batting partner) will drop down to number 3 instead.

Yes the skip is being a collosal helmet. Pish attitude like that will get us nowhere.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 13:19, Reply)

I have to say I'm thoroughly impressed that we've managed to keep this thread going for so long
Opening batsman, eh? I suppose you'll be insulted if I start referring to you as Straussy, then again he wasn't born in England so the comparison doesn't hold ;-)

I would love to say I could take James Jordan but given that he can military press his wife, who is 5'3" of solid muscle and breasts, I might be overestimating my abilities. Now, how to raise the topic... "I thoroughly enjoyed your workshop and demonstration today, Ola. A chap I know on the internet, Reverend Fister is the only name I have for him, would like me to obtain those pants you're wearing."

Oh, and just strange looks, but I'm used to those.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 14:02, Reply)

You're right
I'm amazed that no one has leapt onto here to thwart our dancing/cricket chat. Beats the hell out of tapas anyway.

I'd settle for a comparison with Straussy, although sometimes it's more like 'Our Geoffrey'.

I'm sure that plan would work. Seems foolproof to me. Let me know how you get on with it! So is she as hot in real life as she appears on my goggle-box? One of my colleagues is involved in ballroom dancing in some way, and she reckons that a lot of the top dancers are complete bitches. Is that right, or is she just a jealous old crone?

I have to say I've also got a bit of a soft spot for Flavia Caccace. Yowser.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 14:15, Reply)

WTF?
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-13537084
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:50, Reply)

Fucking magnificent
However, this just makes me facepalm.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:51, Reply)

Careful you don't break a nail

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:53, Reply)

*dials 999*
I actually had to do this the other day, some kids had set fire to a large tree in the park across the road from us. Had it fallen, could have been quite dangerous.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:57, Reply)

Fucking ouch!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:53, Reply)

Indeed
ouch
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:56, Reply)

I wonder how long it'll take him to hel.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:01, Reply)

ium
(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:01, Reply)

Jesus wept.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:03, Reply)

It's all downhill from here today.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:04, Reply)

*goes back to bed*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:08, Reply)

This would be a quality pun if B3ta had spellcheck
Edit: Excellent save
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:02, Reply)

Bit daft innit, most breakfast cereals are sprayed with all manner of extra vitamins and minerals before packaging to improve their nutritional value.
When I was about six or seven I came back from a night at a friend's house and my parents had got a border collie puppy, who we called Fly. Pearl was our cat, a tabby female who was nice enough if I remember. I loved that puppy, he was wonderful. We became good friends and he was fun and interactive and very, very smart and wily. The dog and cat, as nature demands, did not get on.
One day, Pearl swiped at Fly and caught his eye. I have vague recollections of seeing it happen. The dog was hurt and went off to the vets. He was fixed up and returned to us with a bandage and collar and eventually healed to almost full health. I couldn't forgive the cat, though. I couldn't understand why it would do such a thing. Every time I saw it outside, I pulled her tail. I'd lift her up by her tail and she'd squeal and squawk and wriggle and run off into the undergrowth.
I kept up this campaign of punishment and eventually the cat disappeared. I harboured a long-standing guilt until I told my mother a couple of years ago. She said not to worry, and that she thought the cat had been run over by a combine harvester.
Just think yourself lucky you don't have a tail.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 25 May 2011, 9:58, Reply)

WTFOTD
also ha ha ha ha ha
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:00, Reply)

You're a strange man, Noel.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:00, Reply)

This^
Noel Neverforget
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 25 May 2011, 10:02, Reply)

Putting aside
your cat abuse, those bloody forrins have also banned our breakfast cereals for the same reasons I believe.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 25 May 2011, 10:18, Reply)