Wake up, Off Topic!
This is getting depressing now. Where teh hell is everybody?

I'm goingto buck a recent trend, and ask an actual question. What's teh perfect crime? Could you get away with it? How would you go about covering your tracks/establishing an alibi/evading capture?

Alt: why hasn't anyone mentioned the L-word yet?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:28, 188 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

We're all punning
I don't know if this is funny, brave or stupid.
www.theatlanticwire.com/global/2011/09/what-we-know-about-ucla-math-major-fighting-libya/42021/
(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:30, Reply)

Probably a little of both.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:31, Reply)

it's pretty weird.
I'm going with stupid and funny though
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:32, Reply)

When I was that age
I spent my summer holiday in Germany working in a bank.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:33, Reply)

The comments suggest the rebels he was fighting with got annoyed with him and told him to fuck off home.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:33, Reply)

that does not surprise me in the least
he's almost certainly incredibly annoying
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:34, Reply)

Most students are.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:35, Reply)

I've just found out that there is a torrent of Scroobius PIp's new album, that I'll download when I get home.
I can't wait to listen to it. I'm still going to buy it when it comes out though.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:35, Reply)

Are you going to listen to it in your pants while sitting on the sofa?
Gonz, even though Badger has moved on to that great vagina in the sky, can we still go out for ribs?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:37, Reply)

I think I will, I might give my balls a good scratch too, you know, the kind where you get a bit of sweaty white skin under your nail... A two handed one too, one to stretch the sack and the other to really get in there.
I would totally awesomely still love to go out for ribs, how 'bout next week sometime? I'm looking at flats around east and high barnet too now, just in case shit doesn't go down in southgate.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:45, Reply)

I'm not certain that those two sentences should be seen anywhere near each other

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:49, Reply)

I am quietly revolted, myself.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:52, Reply)

There are some good greek restaurants in my neck of the woods.
I can't do next week as I am on full on half marathon prep for the 11th September, do you want me to contact Clendrix and find out when she's free later in the month and we can do diaries and come up with a mutually agreeable date?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:49, Reply)

Yeah that's fine I understand that you might not want to invite me.
After all, it wouldn't be the 'tiny penis club' if I'm there.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:50, Reply)

Well, I'll be honest here
I was going to see what Lusty was up to, but try and arrange it on a day when she knew you were busy. It's not you Bro, it's just, I've gotta look out for my man Gonz here, I can't be his wingman if I also invite his main rival can I now?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:52, Reply)

Oh OK.
That's fine. I guess I'll just...I don't know...do something on my own.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:54, Reply)

You could get a takeaway
or, or, or, here's an idea, you could always just kind of hang around outside the restaurant and we'll pretend we haven't seen you.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:55, Reply)

That sounds good to me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:58, Reply)

And then when we're walking out and Gonz has his arm draped around lustys shoulder
you'll come up and go "Hey Man! What are you doing with my girl?"

and they'll be this awkward pause while we all look at you, and then Gonz will take his arm from round her shoulders, and step forward and look at you with his head tilted slightly to the left and go "Your girl?" and then he'll smile and we'll all laugh and then when we're quiet he'll suddenly jut his head forward and you'll flinch back and then we'll all laugh again and turn and walk off and Gonz will smack lustys arse and she'll put her arm round him and you'll be left standing there in the rain.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:02, Reply)

I'll have a rap-off with him, winner gets the girl and the respect of everyone else... loser isn't allowed to play football on the tennis courts for a month.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:14, Reply)

Yeah', that sounds awesome.
Is there 3 of you? Two of you should dress up as a tower block and one of you as a plane. Have the slowest one as the plane so it looks like the office blocks are running away.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:04, Reply)

Well, I can't speak for Al,
but after that description, I may never eat anything again.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:50, Reply)

I bet you're the sort to have a sniff, too

( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:50, Reply)

Damn straight, and wipe it on my dressing gown afterwards and act like nothing's happened.
Oh man, I'm so looking forward to this scratch later, I might even stretch to using cutlery.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:10, Reply)

Curse my vivid imagination

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:24, Reply)

A bit of low-level fraud and piracy is about as far as I get, too.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:37, Reply)

Oh man I bet there are some 'dirty beats' on there.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:40, Reply)

We're all over on the 'secret cool people' board, soz.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:39, Reply)

*cries*

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:41, Reply)

I bet there are some wicked sticklebricks over there.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:43, Reply)

Shitloads of them.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:48, Reply)

Hey Monty! Hey, Yeah Monty! Yeah! Monthy! Over here! Yeah!
So like on your birthday party are you serious about going for an afternoon Tayyabs/Needos 'cause if you are then I'd totally be all over that shit like a bad case of that disease you caught off of that hooker last december, you know the one you had to be taking all those pills and putting that cream and stuff, and the doctor ended up having to give you suppositories. Yeah, that one. All over it, just like that.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:51, Reply)

Deadly serious.
Stunned poster and Jeff are on board.

PS Lusty doesn't know about that hooker stuff so keep it under your hat, OK?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:52, Reply)

No worries I deffo won't be telling Gonz that story so he can let it slip casually in a conversation some time.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:53, Reply)

No, it's ok.
I mean I'd be up in a strange town and whatnot, but no it's cool. I expect I'm busy, anyway.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:53, Reply)

It's for Internet Hardnuts, Kroney.
Soz.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:55, Reply)

Plus he'll see all the spicy poos coming out, and he'll think they are actual poos
and he'll get all excited and try and stick them up his bottom and he'll end up burning himself.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:56, Reply)

Exactly.
I don't want to be responsible for that.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:57, Reply)

I have no witty comeback to this.
So I'm just going to stand here looking slightly ashamed instead.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:58, Reply)

No it's fine
Piston invited me round his house to have a go on his supercar and supermodels. He might even take me for a helicopter ride.

I expect there'll be a slightly awkward meeting with swipe in the morning as I'm getting there just as she's leaving, but otherwise I'm sure it'll be fine.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:57, Reply)

She doesn't leave that early
She doesn't get out of bed for less than 10 thousand pounds.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:00, Reply)

Lolz aside do come.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 12:56, Reply)

Check in at the hotel's from 2pm
so it would work out rather nicely.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:06, Reply)

Which hotel are you staying at?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:15, Reply)

Some grotty little place called the City View.
It's in Bethnal Green.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:17, Reply)

You know, this is since my best and oldest internet friend
decided that I was too much of a risk to her lady-friends to kip round hers.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:19, Reply)

That BITCH.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:20, Reply)

I NO RITE

( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:21, Reply)

She's actually just jealous
because of all the other "ladies" staying round at hers, she knows they would all be taking in turns to ride your cock and she wouldn't get a look in. Except for literally looking into her living room while a succession of drunk sweaty autistic girls bounce up and down on your engorged phallus. And then one of them would shut the door as she was putting them off.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:22, Reply)

No, she'll be too busy trying to persuade
her rich, powerful and definitely-not-gay boyfriend to not have a go on me too.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:24, Reply)

Ah well it'll be a walk 'home' afterwards, at least.
Have you been innoculated against lice and AIDS?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:19, Reply)

My tetanus is up to date
the rest I'm leaving to the winds of Fate.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:20, Reply)

And the smell or raw sewage.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:20, Reply)

And being agressively bumraped by the Nigerian landlord at 5am.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:22, Reply)

Ah Londres
city of dreams.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:24, Reply)

Alt: which fucking L-word?
Leopard?
Llanelli?
Lambada?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:00, Reply)

my money is on
lice, lickspittle or limoncello
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:04, Reply)

I like Limoncello.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:06, Reply)

on icecream ummmmmmmmmm yum
*wishes he was in Amalfi*
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:06, Reply)

We were discussing limoncello last night
I'm not a fan but that's mainly due to the paintstripper type stuff served up in italian restaurants. I'm sure well made stuff is nice, like decent grappa.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:07, Reply)

the cheap stuff smells
more like toilet cleaner
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:08, Reply)

When I lived in Islington
I went to a v v fancy Italian place where I had grappa for the first time - it was absolutely delicious and I thought I'd 'found' a new drink. I bullied a friend into bringing me back a load from a business trip in Milan (we experts call it 'Milano', before watching some challenging 'film') - it was fucking filth.

I'd rather drink Kroney's poo-juice than go near it ever again.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:11, Reply)

That can be arranged.

( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:18, Reply)

*holds out tea mug expectantly*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:21, Reply)

*squirts*

( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:22, Reply)

Lionel?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:00, Reply)

Limbo-dancing?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:01, Reply)

It's 'Lincolnshire' isn't it.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:02, Reply)

As in sausages.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:03, Reply)

ROSSAGES.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:04, Reply)

*BEST BREAKFAST EVER* - Paul Saus, Daily Star

(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:06, Reply)

I find this a great more funny than perhaps I should.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:07, Reply)

IT'S LUNCH YOU THICKOS!!!

( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:05, Reply)

I'm having finely sliced Wiltshire ham, and a side salad with balsamic dressing.
What I really want is an XXXXTREME BURGER EXPERIENCE like you see on the Food channel.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:09, Reply)

Is that where a burger follows you down a dark alley and kicks seven shades of fuck out of you?

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:11, Reply)

YEAH DUDE!
BUT WITH BLUE CHEESE* AND BACON!!!!!!!

WHOOOAHHH!!!!!!!!


*'XXXXTREME blue cheese', I mean
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:12, Reply)

She does see the Food channel a lot.


I'm only kidding BGB, I'm not saying you see food everywhere, I'm just pulling your leg. Please don't kill me, or rape me. Actually, I could cope with you raping me, but not killing.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:11, Reply)

I genuinely thought she meant lesbians

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:16, Reply)

If I am being truthful I had no idea what the word was.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:17, Reply)

I had cheese on toast for lunch.
but only because I'd run out baked beans and couldn't have my chorizo, baked bean, parsley and lemon juice on toast spectacular
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:19, Reply)

I had ham in pitta breads
as I ran out of bread.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:20, Reply)

that sounds awesome

(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:21, Reply)

it is

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:01, Reply)

L'Oreal Lesbian Labial Lubricant?


because you're worth it?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:10, Reply)

lygerastiaist Luminous L'Oreal Lesbian Labial Lubricant

(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:19, Reply)

Errrr... 'LOL'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:22, Reply)

JOKE?
Just hired an Eastern European cleaner.
It took her five hours to Hoover the house.


Turns out she was a Slovak.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAH
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:31, Reply)

...

( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:31, Reply)

Laughing too hard to type anything, right?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:36, Reply)

Er, yeah.
Sure.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:37, Reply)

LIVERBIRD!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:39, Reply)

Hello Roota.
How are you today?

It is sunny here. I am leaving work early, this is good.

I like ponies and JLS.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:40, Reply)

Hello impostor.
Don't worry about your pleasant disposition, I am inclined to take on a Monterial outlook on your behalf.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:42, Reply)

I was wondering if I could be arsed
to be a sockpuppet within my own normal login. It turns out that I cannot.

I am in a good mood though. I started to deal with some of my shit last night and it feels good - I should also be LOLing with Len within a couple of hours - and then I'm staying overnight with her tomorrow too.

How's about you?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:44, Reply)

I'm in an alright mood.
But I have socialising to do on both Saturday and Sunday this weekend and I can't be arsed. I like it when I don't step out from Friday to Monday really.
If the weather is good I will be going to a food and drink festival and visiting a tiki hut for rum.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:48, Reply)

I once had some rum in a Jamaican bar in Arseditch that was £9 a hit.
It was fucking supreme - easily the nicest I've had. It just tasted of sugar cane. Unfortunately
a) I was wankered and have no idea of its name, merely that it was from Cuba and
b) it was all over the pavement with ten minutes of my drinking it.

Silly Monty.

I like golden rum best, like, err 'Cockspur' and, ah, 'Mount Gay'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:51, Reply)

I will try to be more sensible than that and use food to mop up some rum

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:53, Reply)

this?
www.thedrinkshop.com/products/nlpdetail.php?prodid=1187&afwinid=90909
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:12, Reply)

Nah it was from a tiny producer, no brand name I'd heard before.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:19, Reply)

100million jackpot on the euromillions tonight.
If only I had a time machine.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:58, Reply)

simpler to just wish for the cash.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 13:59, Reply)

but then how would i get to sleep with Jane Fonda around the time of Barberrela?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:02, Reply)

This is a surprisingly good point
Although I must point out that in your case (and probably mine too) merely being present is no guarantee.

Well, actuallly in your case, what with chloroform and all...
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:07, Reply)

And £100million

(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:07, Reply)

Are you suggesting Jane Fonda was a prostitute?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:09, Reply)

She was in Klute.

( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:09, Reply)

Good film, not seen that in ages
*adds to Lovefilm queue*
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:10, Reply)

Cowboys and Aliens isn't showing at my local cinema yet : (
I'm buggered if I'm going to watch Spy Kids 3D.
( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:14, Reply)

I understand it's a load of pompous twaddle*.

*Cowboys and Aliens, not Spy Kids 3D
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:16, Reply)

*groans*
Am...full..must..stay...awake.

172 quid for 10 people!!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:22, Reply)

This is why I never eat a big dinner at work.
*sings lullaby*
( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:23, Reply)

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz*dribbles*

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:25, Reply)

HaHa!
You are totally going to see Spy Kids 3d. I bet it's almost as bad as Chipmunks 3 or what ever career graveyards I had to plow through recently.

On a related note, the Ex was watching some trash the other night, with Jamie Lee Curtis and sigorney weaver in it, than made me realise that both there careers are now basically over. it made me sad.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:20, Reply)

Pfft! My nephew can easily be dissuaded by seeing Spy Kids.
I'll just bung him a fiver. He'll be happy enough.
( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:23, Reply)

Found it.
www.imdb.com/title/tt1414382/
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:28, Reply)

Sigourney Weaver in a romcom????

( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:34, Reply)

A really quite shit romcom, yes.
It saddened me to see Jamie Lee it it but I expected little better.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:42, Reply)

The spy kids films are pretty good
Honestly.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:21, Reply)

You only went because you thought it was called 'Spy ON Kids'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:22, Reply)

I watched it because I'm so into film I know it was directed by Robert Rodriguez who I'm really into.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:25, Reply)

To be honest I'm not keen on adult spy films, never mind children's films.

( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:26, Reply)

It's not for everyone but it's fun, and has a good sense of humour. Not childish.
And the kids aren't shit actors.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:27, Reply)

Ok! we shall see what the lad says.
And I will bow to your good review and go and see it. I managed to sit through the animated Star wars film with him years ago without slitting my throat.
( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:29, Reply)

Shame

(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:42, Reply)

Har...................har!

( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:50, Reply)

No just my charm and wit would be more powerful if I could back it up with some money.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:12, Reply)

Or some actual charm and wit.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:13, Reply)

I'm hilarious
b3ta.com/search/posts/48141/best
compared to
b3ta.com/search/posts/80153/best
(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:17, Reply)

Hey, I'm not the one claiming to be funny.
I have nothing to prove, I already know I'd be lucky to bed Fonda now, let alone than.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:22, Reply)

She's 90-12, you know.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:23, Reply)

I have no clue what that means.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:26, Reply)

In her skin cream advert she says
"I'm 85 (or whatever), you know".
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:27, Reply)

OK.
If you say so, I'm neither surprised, nor particularly interested in this piece of information, but glad you felt the need to share.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:29, Reply)

Pleasure.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:30, Reply)

You all came back!
Hurrah! So, tell me all about the secret cool board. Is it nice? Are there throw cushions?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:13, Reply)

of course not, girls aren't allowed and only girls like throw cushions.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:14, Reply)

What do you do for boobies without girls?

( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:15, Reply)

well, we used to Use Bobby's
But now he's flounced it's a bit tricky.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:17, Reply)

Where has everyone flounced off to?
If this carries on, /OT is going to be Monty, Al, Rory and Chompy. And that's a party waiting to happen...
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:21, Reply)

Don't know if they've gone anywhere, just not here.
Not totally sure Bobby was serious, but ho knows, I even flounced my self for about a minute yesterday.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:24, Reply)

You don't really want to be invited to that.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:24, Reply)

Suits me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:24, Reply)

that's because you think anything nice is bent.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:25, Reply)

swap bent and nice.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:26, Reply)

You'd like that, wouldn't you?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:29, Reply)

I'll try anything once.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:30, Reply)

I think you're really fucking nice.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:30, Reply)

Why thank you.
Wish I could say the same.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:41, Reply)

Yeah this, you'd have thought she's have named someone shit.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:26, Reply)

This is starting to remind me of the death of the home sweet home threads
everyone going waahh don't give into the trolls offtopic is for nice conversation. When the HSH threads stopped offtopic became excellent for a while and loads of people joined. I think we need a mass exodus of the whingers
(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:36, Reply)

Forums have their ups and downs.
It'll pick up again, I'm sure.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:37, Reply)

It would be quite nice to go a day without people moaning about someone else on here.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:39, Reply)

I concur.
People used to have a skin.
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:42, Reply)

Circumcision lolz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:49, Reply)

OH GOD THERE YOU GO AGAIN.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:43, Reply)

it got stupid when the HSH threads were around
it was either really saccharin, or people mindlessly calling each other cunts. Nothing wrong with a bit of insulting, but at least there has been some interesting conversation
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:51, Reply)

I'm going to vanity flounce soon
and then lurk to see who misses me. And then create a sock puppet to come back a while later to say "where's that Kroney bloke gone, then? He was the best poster on here!"

Then I shall watch the nostalgia and tears of regret.

Because that's what well-adjusted people do on the internet.

Hi, Bert!
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:27, Reply)

hahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:29, Reply)

There are shitloads of girls - we just haven't told Stalin here.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:18, Reply)

Trotsky, if you please.
Stalin was a wanker, and not any kind of communist.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:25, Reply)

You all look alike to me.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:27, Reply)

Trotsky was way more jewish looking
and had cooler facial hair.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:31, Reply)

Stalin looked like a 70's porn star.

( girlinthehole, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:32, Reply)

So does Monty.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:33, Reply)

Monty is a 70 year old porn star
how else do you think he managed to bag a sweet thing like lusty?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:34, Reply)

I assumed he drugged her.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:39, Reply)

Haha!
Only the first time.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:53, Reply)

It's fucking amazing.
That's all I'm allowed to say, I'm afraid.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:17, Reply)

Well, screw you, Boyce!
Screw you with Darth's!
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:20, Reply)

Oh man.
That's the coolest board. EVAH!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:26, Reply)

I know!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:28, Reply)

Hour to go!!
I decided I would join the 15.30 cool club.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:31, Reply)

I'm considering upgrading to 15:00
My motivation is at all time low. And it's sunny.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:34, Reply)

It's proper nice outside
Monty, how do you best deal with a subordinate who, when you ask them to do a relatively simple task that somehow has to be achieved, starts coming up with stupid reasons why it can't be done?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:37, Reply)

CTITF

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:39, Reply)

Give us some details Al
There's precious little else on at the moment!
( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:39, Reply)

Ugh.
Put some fucking trousers on you internet freak.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:40, Reply)

Give over, it's sunny

( Kroney, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:41, Reply)

I mock them HARD.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:39, Reply)

Slovak joke went down well.
Was countered with the cream of sum yung gai joke.

How we laughed.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:47, Reply)

Well at least someone round here appreciates high-end wit.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:48, Reply)

Too right.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:49, Reply)

That's a great idea. You go.
If anyone queries it, say I said it was OK.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 2 Sep 2011, 14:38, Reply)