Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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what's the best thing you ever had, like ever?Alt: If you could have lunch with anyone, who would it be?
Altalt: *sigh* what the fuck are you shoving down your throat for lunch today? (for darth, it'll be cock LOL)
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:40,
151 replies,
latest was 13 years ago)
YEY \o/I got blocked from that last thread
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:42,
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I dunno, just get a sign saying webiste blocked due to sexual content(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:44,
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nah stil workingi think it's sporadic, although it's happening more often
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:46,
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wankstain fucknut cumgargling labiapunch arseshitfucklet's see what the firewall makes of that!
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:48,
Reply)
Grammar:the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:50, Reply)
You never replied to my witty comment about your sigYou'RE a cunt.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:51, Reply)
You're a cunt everywhereHope this helps.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:57,
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Last threadBasically I said something incredibly clever about how the date was (almost) continuing your sig, whereas tomorrow it'll look like a report on a mass lesbian wedding
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:03, Reply)
I said something funny once.Can't remember what it was now though :(
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:11,
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Nothing, none of those are recognised swearwordsExcept possibly in Glasgow, where invention in the field of swearing is not only recognised but rewarded.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:49, Reply)
ooOOOOoOoooOOOoooOOoOOoOOoOoooooOOOoOOOoOoooOOOOoOoooooOOOooohwell get you miss fancypants
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:51,
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fine! but if you're going underwear shopping I want to go to the games workshop.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:53,
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Ah, the geek crecheFine, I don't want you seeing me get measured for a bra anyway. Last time was mortifying, the tape measure wasn't big enough, they had to improvise with Andrex
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:04, Reply)
the prick! let's burn the fucker down.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:46,
Reply)
I've just taken delivery of the single of Super Gran by Billy Connolly. I think it's probably that.Alt: Jimi Hendrixzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Alt alt: Spaghetti rings on toast. Sainsbury's own brand :o((((((((((((((((
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:49,
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Sainsbury's own?Posh cunt. There's several more inches before you hit the bottom of the barrel yet.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:51, Reply)
I love Monty's idea of being broke"We could only afford own brand foie gras."
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:53,
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that's kinda posh.good to see you're keeping up standards even in poverty.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:52,
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I thought you didn't like Billy Connolly?(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:00,
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He likes Supergran though.For some reason. It was incredibly shit.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:23,
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I think it is going to have to be your mum for all three questions.Predictable, I know.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:55,
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I was LOLLING as I typed itLOL!
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:58,
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Millennium Falcon, Christmas present when I was 6Don't remember being so excited about a material possession since.
Alt: Nigella Lawson. Great food AND a blowie.
AltAlt: I have got chicken today as it happens, you're fucking psychic old boy
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 11:55, Reply)
Alt. For a fattie,she's cute. Yes I would.
Altalt, I think it's cheeseburger and chips.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:01, Reply)
I wouldn't call her fat, not at allAlthough I do love this picture
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:05,
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she has, in the words of Mos Def,An ass so fat you can see it from the front.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:23, Reply)
that's why she is only ever filmed from the qwaist up(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:25,
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COR! She can stick my sausage in her george foreman grill any time she wantsAnd by my sausage I mean my penis, and by her george foreman grill I mean her george foreman grill. Phwoar!
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Peej, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:10,
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i have a fancy client lunch todaywhich should be Rather Good.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:01,
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I'm working late tonightSo a fortifying pie and chips for lunch. fatlolz. It's alright though, I'm going to have some vegetables.
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Kroney, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:01,
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Good lad, the late night drive thru shift is a hard onebut one that will get you noticed by the management
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:04,
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GO TO MARTINSor POPIANDYS
they will fill you up
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:11,
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MARTIN, 32, TELECOMMUNICATIONS MANAGER?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:12,
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neinmartin the extraordinary borat replica who runs the bistro in uxbridge
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:13,
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hahahahhaharanked second of 31 restaurants in uxbridge.
now THERE'S an accolade.
www.4web4.de/
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:14,
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WHY is that the first thing you noticed?you clanging gimp
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:21,
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Your fantasies are becoming more and more unsettling.I am going to have to start locking my door at night.
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Kroney, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:28,
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haha like i'd be caught dead in slough, darlingi think you're quite safe
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:29,
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i've never eaten dinner alonebut i quite like having lunch with a book sometimes. bit of peace away from the carnage of the office.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:21,
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+ when i always eat aloneand to think you could have come round mine, fixed my router and had a good feed
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:18,
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No I got it working, hasn't helped the signal strength through, which was the whole pointtonight i will endevor to change the channel it broadcasts on...
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:21,
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Do you have thick walls/floors/electrical equipmentbetween you and the router in the areas of low signal?
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Kroney, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:22,
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Well maybe, however I get a a better signal from "Pauline" one floor down and one flat acrossand about 12 other networks pop up as well, which is why i though a channel change might work
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:24,
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If you've got a smart phone, get an app called 'Wifi Analyzer'That'll allow you to see the wireless networks near you, and what channels they are broadcasting on.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:37,
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I was planning something like this, and then chossing the least used channelapparently 1, 6 or 11 are the ones to go for
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:38,
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I've bought most of the things I value most, so I struggle to think of anything for the most partAside from that, probably my PS2, although I would have liked it more if it were a surprise.
Alt: Nigella Lawson, as Monty puts it, "I would boff her until her eyes fell out."
Alt Alt: Bolognaise on a jacket potato.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:02,
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When I was a small boy I opened my birthday present from my grandad and it was a Sinclair Spectrum 48k. I have never felt joy like that day since, and I've witnessed the birth of my kids.
I'd have lunch with the one with the nicest arse
I am having a Chicken Gumbo that I made yesterday.
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Peej, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:07,
Reply)
My technicsAlt- Ted Bundy, we could exchange anecdotes about chicks digging us.
Alt alt- a nommy sammich.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:19, Reply)
lol I'm always mixing up my serial killers(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:23,
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I'm always mixing up my Kellogs Cereals.Cornflakes AND cocopops. In the same bowl. WHAT AM I LIKE, EH?
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:27,
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I haven't had a KitKat for years, now you mention it.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:30,
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no, he shagged a lot of birdsthe film is pretty horrific. there's one bit where he is boning his girlfriend and he has tied her up and gagged her, and wants her to pretend that she is a corpse. when she moves, he shouts.
now, if your boyfriend wants you to pretend that you are a corpse, THAT is your clue that ALL IS NOT WELL.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:23,
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Yet, in your case, when he wants you to pretend to be a man, that's ok?(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:24,
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i've said it before, and i'll say it againi've had much much much much much worse
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:28,
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He was a very confused boyNecrophilia is all well and good, but why not just do it with an actual corpse? They're easier and cheaper to pick up, never pretend to have a headache, totally faithful and, most importantly, don't move during coitus.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:25, Reply)
fascinatinglyOne of his family said that when the madness descended, his face would change and he would give off a peculiar smell.
Pure animal fury. Fascinating man.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:42, Reply)
he was a pretty suave guy.He, and the fictional Pat Bateman, taught me purdy much everything I know about suavity.
Take that as you will.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:25, Reply)
i love the way you felt the need to point out that bateman is fictionalbecause the rest of us have never heard of him?!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:28,
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I just wanted y'all to know that I live my life, y'know, grounded in the present reality.(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:30, Reply)
I ate lunch, it was food.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:35,
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spare me your life story LOL!(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:36,
Reply)
makes a change from semen anda sound beating I suppose(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:36,
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you leave my wife out of this!(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:38,
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You retract that about my fucking cunt kids! That's fucking out of order, mate!(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:44, Reply)
Best thing I ever had was a Raleigh Chopper for ChristmasLunch with William Gibson.
Today's lunch is Oxtail soup and brown bread. Rock & Roll baby!
PS - I hate my new keyboard
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:47, Reply)
it doesn't like you either.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:48,
Reply)
DarthDid you see that Norwich pipped York to the post in the CAMRA beer census?
Soz for lack of lolz.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:49, Reply)
I did not see thatIt is a cracking place to find real ales, is Naaaaarch
Thank you for the update :-)
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:54, Reply)
my little car. I love that little beast.Alt: you lot, obviously.
Altalt: what do you care? Fuck off, you nosy cunt.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 12:57,
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You lot are boring me so I'm dragging my weary carcass to the gym(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:04,
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I can't decide if you mean he considers swings and see-saws to be exercise equipmentor something much, much, much, much, much, much worse
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:12, Reply)
The former.It was either the playground or a witty '+ jungle', implying he was going to one of those soft play area things they have in 'family friendly' restaurants.
I'm sorry, I've been doing a lot of cleaning over the last couple of days, and I think the bleach fumes might have affected me.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:15,
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Did you actually want my LoveFilm 2 months membership thingy btw?I've gone and lsot your address like a twat so please gaz it me and I'll send it on. I've heard cautionary tales of you having to give them all your details which then generates a regular monthly payment after the trail period ends, so be warned
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:21, Reply)
Yeah, I've heard you have to give them card details to generate a membership, but as long as you opt out before the end of the trial period, they shouldn't charge you.I thought it might be a good idea to see what there is on lovefilm, as there's fuck all on the tv over the summer.
Well, apart from the olympics, of course.
I'll gaz you.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:24,
Reply)
LoveFilm is fucking brilliantespecially for catching up on TV shows like The Wire and Six Feet Under that you'd have to either wait ages for obscurely-timed repeats or shell out for the box set
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:27, Reply)
i did think about Netflix, as I have a wii but no PS3 / XBoxbut then it seemed that the range was shit, so it was hardly worth it.
Anyway, now I've got my shiny new iPad.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:28,
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ooo get you, actually Darth does have a point about the TV shows. Some of them are ok, but the majority of the content on Lovefilm is pap.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:30, Reply)
enjoy your bumming in the shower.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:11,
Reply)
Again, confusedAre you suggesting his gym is full of opportunistic, predatory homosexual rapists or skipping ahead to the consequences of the aforementioned something much, much, much, much, much worse?
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:16, Reply)
no, I'm suggesting he'll have a big smile on his face while bending overand beckoning all to come enjoy his gaping anus.
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mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:22,
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but you hoped, didn't you.(
mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:34,
Reply)
I think at that point his carer would probably interveneand get him quickly back on the sunshine bus.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 13:24,
Reply)
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