Irrational loves and hates
I love crisp, cold, green apples but cannot bring myself to eat a red apple. I don't know why (apart from the crippling autism)

Haribo are the stuff of dreams but I hate Skittles

Tell me of your loves and hates please

Alt:
Good weekend?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:04, 137 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I love, love, LOVE sour skittles. In fact almost sour anything. The more it makes me salivate at the thought, the better.
Other loves include:
Cups of tea
Salt and vinegar chips.

Hates include:
Brussels sprouts
Not knowing where I stand

I hope this answered your queries.

Also: it was eh. called in sick to work because of the mountain of study. Am quitting on thursday. I predict it will go badly.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:09, Reply)

I love York, except for those bloody noisy bells.
You didn't mention them, did you? Are you deaf or something?

Alt: Yeah, good weekend, I changed a ball valve.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:20, Reply)

did you enjoy York then?
Nice to visit, dull to reside in.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:24, Reply)

York is a lovely place, and I enjoyed myself immensely
We did all the things I thought we would do, and the weather was not too bad.

Actually I have one gripe: Beer is just wrong when the sparkler on the tap is screwed up tight. I'm not into creamy heads, and prefer it southern style.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:30, Reply)

where did you go drinking?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:32, Reply)

In York.
Obviously.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:37, Reply)

Hehe.
Don't take it out on Plum, with your irrational hatred of sprouts you bully.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:39, Reply)

It's not irrational, they're just fucking wrong.
As is he.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:47, Reply)

Mostly in the Guy Fawkes Inn.
But also in several other places. The beer always came out the same, taking ages to clear. Even Hopback Summer Lightning, which should be crip, tasted bland.

I hope its not just me.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:38, Reply)

GAY Fawkes, more like!!!!!!
Hop Bare
S b
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:46, Reply)

convoluted, but just worthwhile

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:48, Reply)

Its a lol from me

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:54, Reply)

I wondered why it was so dark in there.
Indescriminate bumdering in the corners
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:58, Reply)

I dont live in York
and the last time I was there was 4 years ago. This will be rectified next week
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:57, Reply)

You weird cunt. Suicide is the only solution to such crippling Asperger's. Soz.
I love proper old skool hip hop, as evidenced by my going to a fucking superb do on Saturday. Barbecue, break-beats, b-boying and graffiti, all for free in a lovely venue in Leytonstone.

Hates: blacks, foreigns, benders, flids etc.
Alt: Fuck yes, brah.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:46, Reply)

That dude's fingers look wrong

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:58, Reply)

I'll pass on your assessment to the poor lad.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:00, Reply)

He looks about to attempt the reverse shocker

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:03, Reply)

red apples can gtfo
I don't much like fish, but I love taramasalata.

alt: yes, thenk you, the sun makes all the difference. However I missed the /OT breakdowns, can someone fill me in?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:47, Reply)

Clearly you've never had a Jazz Apple,
they're delicious.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:48, Reply)

I had a Jazz Apple with your mum and almost put my back out
morning/evening poppet, who's on your hit list today?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:49, Reply)

You are for starters you shithead.
You leave my mother out of this place, she's done NOTHING to you.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:49, Reply)

I've done a lot to her, though. A LOT.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:50, Reply)

yeah but you're a slag, I expect you to.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:52, Reply)

sl f
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:52, Reply)

that too.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:55, Reply)

*runs post through seriousness analysis algorithm*

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:51, Reply)

Why is it, that I've had a great day, and I'm still in a shit mood huh?
it's not fucking fair.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:56, Reply)

you are obviously a menkle
try gin, i find that works. Or find yourself a puppy to play with
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:58, Reply)

just make sure it's not one of those man eating poisonous Australian puppies

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:58, Reply)

I hate puppies. Nowhere near as cute as kittens.
and thanks for reminding me that I have no access to either of them. You cunt.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:01, Reply)

meowbify.com/
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:03, Reply)

Oh I do like that.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:06, Reply)

I love haribo, ale, breasts, roast lamb sandwiches, bacon, marmite, and many other things
I hate nuts (especially peanuts, they stink), liver, walking to work when it's very warm, finding out someone has hidden the large fan we keep in the brew room.

Alt: Excellent thanks, spent the weekend with the Missus, went to see Avenue Q and the new Batman film, planned our holiday for the end of next month, came home and was only 20 seconds off the train when I received a phone call from a housemate, inviting me to the pub. I left about 4 pints later, feeling rather happy, before sticking a bolognaise in the slow cooker, and going to bed.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:47, Reply)

Morning, fatcunt.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:49, Reply)

Morning, shitwit.
How are you?

Btw, you know your jerk recipe? I want to make a slow cooked caribbean curry, would it suffice, or should I tone down the spice a little, as I'll be cooking it IN the sauce.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:50, Reply)

If anything you should add more spice as it will all steam out during the long cooking...

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:52, Reply)

Really?
I'd have thought it would intensify.

Also, I'm slow cooking with the lid on, so the steam should all stay in...
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:53, Reply)

No definately put more in

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:56, Reply)

Cut down spices and flavourings for slow cookers
Especially stuff like bay leaves and cinnamon. DAMHIKT
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:56, Reply)

"you are a screaming bum-bandit"
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:59, Reply)

Thank you for the endorsement!
As an aside, are there recognised ISO classification levels of bum-banditry? does it start with Lisping, then move up to Mincing, then Flaming, Screaming and finally, Gerbilling?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:07, Reply)

These are the rules.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:08, Reply)

Tru Dat

(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:10, Reply)

I will get it for you.
I've another one which I haven't tested which I have on good authority is ace.

Never tone down the spice, unless you are a screaming bum-bandit. It's a simple rule which many fail to follow. And you really have to have scotch bonnets as the flavour is integral, let alone the heat - other chillies will not do.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:55, Reply)

Danke

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:56, Reply)

All this food is why you're a fatty now.............













and me
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:03, Reply)

I saw your status this morning, fatty. You still weigh more than I do.
Well done on the weight loss though, how have you done that?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:10, Reply)

I weigh considerably more than him.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:10, Reply)

him a small moon
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:14, Reply)

That's no moon

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:16, Reply)

It is if I pull my trousers down.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:16, Reply)

AIDS

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:11, Reply)

You weigh less than 13 stone? Seriously?
I don't mean to offend but you do look heavier, mind you I put in a lot of mile on the bike so some could be put down to muscle I guess.

I lost it following a new and highly complicated diet called eat less and do more. I was 14 stone and fed up with sucking my gut in, not im just under 13 and don't have to suck the gut in but would like to lose a bit more.
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:25, Reply)

He's only 4' 5"
technically he should still sit on a booster cushion when he's in a car.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:28, Reply)

Aye, I know
Tbh, even when my weight dropped a fair amount, my face still stayed fat, and I retained 4 or 5 of my chins. I'm trying to eat properly again, and walk home from work every day, just to lose it a bit at a time, then at the end of September, I'm signing up to the same gym as my housemate, and we'll head down most days.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:31, Reply)

I can't afford a gym
So I just stay active.
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:41, Reply)

Ahh, fair enough

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:53, Reply)

Your Mum.
Your Mum.

Alt: Oddly, your Mum.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:51, Reply)

My mum is the sweet and sour sauce
or the yin/yang of /offtopic backdoor smashing
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:56, Reply)

We should send her a card or something

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:59, Reply)

She is in Ostend or somewhere at the moment

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:04, Reply)

I'v been to her Ostend

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:08, Reply)

I love all sweets, I probably shouldn't but I do.
It's a real struggle not to fill my cupboards with some of Swizzell Matlow's finest.

As to hates, I can't stand cold sauces. Tomato, brown, BBQ, mayonnaise, salad cream etc etc. Really really hate them, won't eat anything with them on which makes buying fast food or shop sandwiches quite difficult. I even gave back a bacon sandwich at a greasy spoon because the knife used to cut mine had been used to cut a tomato-sauced monstrosity before and had left sauce on my sandwich.

Alt: Great weekend, thanks for asking. BBQ for nephew's birthday on Saturday, Twang club and a nice curry on Sunday.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:54, Reply)

I love my kids
I hate everyone else. I don't eat sweets, they taste good but I feel shitty afterwards, same goes for dessert or "pudding" as us common folk call it.

Yes I did fuck all except get pissed in the sun on homemade black cherry wine which was remarkably good.
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:57, Reply)

That reminds me, call "pudding" a "sweet"
and I will have to rip out your eyeballs and shove them up your arse so that when you shit, you shit in your own eyes
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:00, Reply)

It's only fair.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:08, Reply)

I love your kids too. Regularly.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:07, Reply)

Pedo jokes are just so funny.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:11, Reply)

I've explained to several B3tans before
That my daughters have taste and wouldn't fuck any geriatric Gary Oldman lookalikes.
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:26, Reply)

I'm with you on the apples. I won't touch a red one, and I have no idea why.
Then again, I am officially a mental, so it could be that.

Alt: pretty good ta, yeah. Watched an awful lot of golf, for some reason. Those commentators say some weird shit.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:57, Reply)

*green apple high-fives*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:58, Reply)

You're an apple racist that's why.
Its probably because where green apples are crisp, juicy and slightly tart a red apple is soggy, tasteless and shit.
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:59, Reply)

They look like they taste chalky.
This is an entirely irrational viewpoint, but I am a girl and therefore contractually obliged to be irrational.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:01, Reply)

Alt: Dear God, how tedious.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 8:59, Reply)

This, from the King Of Tedium.
spouting bollocks about this band and that band that nobody else has ever heard of or cares about.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:02, Reply)

It's not my fault people are stupid.
If I got together everyone in Britain who had decent taste, I wouldn't have a 'crowded house' - DO YOU SEE WHAT I HAVE DONE HERE?????
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:06, Reply)

It's not my fault everyone else under the age of, y'know, METHUSELAH likes to listen to stuff that isn't noisy SHIT.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:09, Reply)

I bet you like "Mike and the Mechanics"

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:14, Reply)

Never heard of the losers.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:16, Reply)

looking back
over my shoulder, I can say they were shit
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:20, Reply)

Arse mechanics, more like!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:21, Reply)

"Your big end's gone, luv'"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:31, Reply)

Yesterday they said one of the players was a good ball stroker.
I nearly shat a kidney, I was laughing so hard.
I am so mature.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:02, Reply)

I had a giggling fit while dissecting the sheep's heart today because my lab partner said "Woah, look at those flaps!"

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:04, Reply)

Yeah, I just giggled reading that.
Soooo, sooooo mature....
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:05, Reply)

Both of these stories have made me do a lol

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:07, Reply)

There's one thing more pointless than watching golf
And that's listening to it on the radio.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:03, Reply)

Does this red apple issue extend to green and red apples
such as Cox and Breaburn?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:01, Reply)

Braeburn apples as they are correctly spelled can fuck off
but the cox gets through on a loophole due to its unwavering Englishness
( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:04, Reply)

Braeburn's are excellent apples

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:10, Reply)

Braeburns are better than cox.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:28, Reply)

i like braeburns

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:29, Reply)

He loves Cox.
That's what I heard.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:05, Reply)

He makes science interesting.
And he's so dreamy.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:07, Reply)

Granny Smiths or GTF
Same goes for apples
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:07, Reply)

if i hadn't been banned i might have liked to join in on this thread


(sigh)
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:08, Reply)

so are you Bert?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:09, Reply)

DO I LOOK LIKE FUCKEN BERT??????

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:10, Reply)

You do write in the same font

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:10, Reply)

And act very erratically too.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:11, Reply)

I bet he owns a kilt

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:12, Reply)

I bet he also takes photos of his cock, dresses them up in paint, and hides them until the opportune moment to post them on the internet presents itself.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:15, Reply)

ok, this one is true

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:16, Reply)

I FUCKING KNEW IT.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:17, Reply)

i wish i had a picture of my cock to punctuate the end of this sentence
would other people's do? muchadoaboutpenis.tumblr.com/
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:24, Reply)

No.
I don't want to see your cock, or another person's cock, on the internet.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:28, Reply)

how about a stopcock?
www.plumbworld.co.uk/stop-cock-bs1010-cxc-15mm-0-3945
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:31, Reply)

Oh man, Noel really messed you up didn't he.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:32, Reply)

up
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:32, Reply)

No, I just can't look at cocks without thinking how ugly and weird looking they are.
So why would I spend time actively looking at one?
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:34, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1680411
(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:35, Reply)

You confuse me. I do not like this.
Ergo, I currently do not like you at all.
(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:36, Reply)

You're so judgemental

(Bazongaloid, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:43, Reply)

my cock's quite pretty really
it's smooth like a salamander
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:48, Reply)

YAY, no Quenntin!

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:09, Reply)

>:(

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:10, Reply)

Pay me the money you own me Q

( Peej, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:11, Reply)

You make him pay for blowjobs now?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:12, Reply)

Makes him pay for the privilege of giving one.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:12, Reply)

privilege mortgage
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:46, Reply)

?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:15, Reply)

I love good beer that doesn't taste of chemicals, or piss, or both.
Also bacon, properly cooked steak, and a good tasty curry.
I irrationally hate ignorant and selfish people, it's just as well it's illegal to fit machine guns and surface to surface missiles to a family hatchback...

Alt: see like list above, + sunshine = good.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:24, Reply)

I continued my weekend food perfection marathon all day yesterday!
Pancakes, smoked bacon and maple syrup for breakfast
Remainder of sweet potato thing for lunch
Roast chicken dinner with all the trimmings
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:30, Reply)

Hey fatty bum bum, lickle sugar dumplin'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:36, Reply)

Jealousy is a terrible thing

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:36, Reply)

You would know.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:37, Reply)

Oy!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:38, Reply)

shalom

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:43, Reply)

Start a new thread, Apey
There's a good chap
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:43, Reply)

all done...sort of

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:51, Reply)

Sean Connery's lesser known skateboarding event.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:51, Reply)

hahaha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:52, Reply)

I came close. ..
Bacon butties/roast chicken dinner/ bbq steak, etc.
Overall yours wins though.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:40, Reply)

Yuck, eh, and yuck.

(Poppet some assembly required., Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:40, Reply)

A good silver medal effort though

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:41, Reply)

Oh, and large mushrooms with garlic, breadcrumbs and butter filling, roasted
they do repeat on you a bit, though.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Mon 23 Jul 2012, 9:46, Reply)